#shifty headcanons

[radioactive-earthshine]

Giving the core four traits and opinions that make me sigh and not in a good way because I've seen too many people try to headcanon them as shining perfect leftist liberals with no flaws or shifty opinions that could create an interesting story or dialog.

Bart: will never ever vote, period. He's not anti-democracy he just has this stance that every social injustice people struggle with today are fixed by the time he is born and him not voting is not going to change that. He'd rather do anything else other than engage in politics to help. He will do everything else, but he's not voting. He's operating under an understanding of society from 1000 years in the future so he comes off as sometimes apathetic to social injustices and is clueless on why they are so important. He gets better but he ain't voting.

Tim: he's a canon DARE kid. No one is allowed to do drugs and no drug should be legal or regulated. He also has some deeply ingrained conservative beliefs he needs to challenge and work on. Some of those extend to his own relationship to the queer community and he believes that people being too flamboyant actually hurts them and it would be better if they conformed more. I could go on but that would be bullying him.

Cassie: She believes people just need to work harder to pull themselves up. Homeless? Just get a job and be smarter about your choices! She's prone to victim blaming, and can be deeply insensitive and non understanding to people's own hardships. Often holds herself to such a high standard she forgets she is allowed to make mistakes and others are too, and this frustrates her deeply. If she could make community service mandatory for everyone she would because she believes so strongly in people doing more even at the expense of their mental health. She bullies the ever loving shit out of Bart for not voting every single year.

Kon: doesn't believe sex work is a legitimate or respectable career, he can't help but think those that are "illegal" sex workers can do better and they should be "helped out their current situation instead because no one is actually mentally stable while being a sex worker". He also believes legalizing prostitution wouldn't help anyone or give anyone more autonomy and protection but it would make human trafficking easier.

[radioactive-earthshine]

Kon Superboy is like, a good person socially (and I do love him. This makes him spicy) and does have nuanced and empathetic takes on issues that are important to him, but he’s Not a cool counterculture punk anarchist. He’s got weird sorta conservative baked in opinions from his shady cloning lab information uploads, and from years of being a teen celebrity under the guardianship of Rex Leech, also just from being a shithead 16 year old.

He’s also never voted, I think he spent a lot of time not being legally people let alone legally an adult and never shifted out of that mindset and also I think he’s been dead/erased from reality on major election years.

Kon being a punk is such wishful thinking, there is nothing in his comics to point him in the directions of being a punk counterculture anarchist.

You're right! I do think he came out of the tube as a person who ultimately wanted to do good, and was good, but did have some conservative opinions just installed in his brain that he had to work through. We sort of see this even in his comics by the way how he treated women. He gets better as time goes on, but it was still something he had to process.

This poor boy hasn't even made it to 18 yet 😭 and when he could vote he was ripped from reality lmfao. He finally turns 18 and CAN vote and then just.... doesn't.

[radioactive-earthshine]

B5 has never voted in an election, is entirely unaware of and uninterested in any political issue that does not affect him directly and can name the president only because he would explode from humiliation if someone asked him and he didn't know.

He's just so utterly unbothered with 21st century politics and considers the time a place of barbarism with exception to Kara, Clark and a sparing few other people making it better. Otherwise he don't give AF and can't be bothered with it. In his own time, he at least does vote during the Legion's own elections (and complains about them) because it is a thing that can deeply impact him and his friends.

I think for Querl his investment in politics is entirely situational, he'll either care a lot because he feels he needs to and it really will impact him or his friends and all sentients, but if he doesn't think it matters much he just doesn't CARE.

He don't know Obama.

[shiftysdogtags]

Can I request fluffy headcanons of Shifty falling for a girl?

I have talked to @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant about this in depth at some point and it has given me a whole new love for Shifty. 

All requests are open💕

Taglist: @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant @floydtab

I feel like for Shifty there wasn’t a ‘falling in love’ process before he met her. There was a time before he seen her, and there was everything after that moment. There is no in between for him. It's a sudden and quick process and he just knew the second he saw her that his single life was over, and he wanted her more than anything. It was only after they began their relationship that he realised the ‘falling in love’ thing would be him loving her more and more than before.

The first time he laid eyes on her he could physically feel his heart sing with happiness. He couldn’t look away from her direction, and while he was never a big believer in love at first sight, he definitely was when he seen her smile.

Shifty is a blusher and it doesn't take much to get him to blush but, there are different levels. He blushes lightly when he is complemented or when everyone stares at him on his birthday. He turns undeniably red when he sees a pretty girl looking at him, and it only gets worse if he makes eye contact with her.

Even from the opposite side of the street he would feel a little bit awkward because he doesn't want to keep staring but he can't look away either. He wants to remember everything about her. He knows that he will never feel the same again and he wants to make sure he appreciates the moment enough.

Letting her walk away was one of the biggest regrets of his life and he swears if he ever saw her again, he would do anything to talk to her. He couldn’t get the picture of her laughing in her little blue dress out of his head and he spends the next two weeks moping around, planning what he would say to her and how he would ask her out.

When he finally sees her again, he would be mesmerised. It is in the exact same place he had seen her previously and he was stuck to his place on the path. But he finds enough confidence from somewhere and before he knows it his feet would have him moving towards her. And of course, he trips over his feet, but he doesn't let that stop him from getting to know the prettiest girl he has ever seen.

When he tries to ask her out, he can help but stutter and mumble. He is always messing up his words by thinking faster than he can talk. Eventually, he gathers himself together and he is really formal. He introduces himself as Darrell, thinking Shifty wasn’t proper enough for such a pretty girl, and the way she says his name is his new favourite sound. He likes to call her ‘Miss’ and ‘Ma’am’ even when she insists he just uses her name.

After the first date he wouldn’t wait around long enough for a goodnight kiss. Once he made sure she was safely at her front door, he says a quick goodnight and leaves. He wanted a kiss, he really did, but he didn’t want to put her in the position where she felt awkward, like she had to kiss him. He would be way too nervous to make a move.

The whole way home he couldn’t help but relive the whole date. It was the night he knew he wanted to marry her. Shifty loves being in love. He didn’t know such a strong feeling could be felt towards someone. And he is really glad he somehow managed to ask a girl like her out, even after he tripped.

The following few months was kind of repetitive in their relationship. They spent all their free time together and sometimes Shifty would surprise her with an afternoon walk when he was finished work. No matter how tired he was, he always wanted to be with her. 

He has a picture of the both of them tucked into the frame of the mirror in his room. Every time he looks at it his heart swells and he falls in love all over again. Shifty doesn't fall in love with his girl just once, he falls over and over again throughout the years of their relationship.

She is the one who has to hold his hand and every time without fail he blushes the deepest shade of red possible. It’s only after they have been together for ages will he be the one to make a move. He is constantly learning new things about her and just when he thinks he has her completely figured out, he learns something new.

Their shared first kiss is the definition of the sweetest moment ever. He never wanted to spring it upon her, but he didn’t want to over plan it either. He would be really relieved when it just kind of happened. He didn’t know what to do with his hands and they randomly ended up in her hair, but he doesn't remember moving them there.

His lips are really soft so when she randomly leaned in for a quick peck, he blurts out that he loves her. It was the first time he had said it out loud to anyone. He thought it was the most unromantic way to have told her, and he was completely convinced he had messed everything up. The smile on her face when she says it back changes his mind very quickly. From that moment on he tries to tell her every chance he gets, and he likes to remind her that she is the light of his life.