Tags by @shininglightofdarkness that deserved their own post:
#ciel wanting to be consumed - because he knows he will be consumed utterly one day and it's a way to control it. because one day it will be #a peaceful release but now it's part of the game. because he wants comfort and because he wants yo know he is the centre of sebastians #desires and how he imposes his own to provoke that.
#see this is the flavour i love. its desire and theres respect and affection but so much of that comes from just how much ciel impresses#sebastians palate #i think he also likes how far ciel - with his guidance/grooming of ciels nature - can be drawn away from humanity #i think part of the thrill is desiring and eating and desiring to eat something like himself #no meal will ever satisfy him after ciel. ciel might have been almost like a communion of his own nature#as well as a feast #and then - ironically - i think he may have the rather human feeling of a peak defining experience meant to shape a brief life #but hes immortal. what can he do? he just drifts. frustrated that for all her starves and stews in boredom it is because this time he cannot #sate himself on the thing that changed his stomach and his tastes and his shape to this shape #i think it's fascinating if kuro ends that way. after ripping through the victorian underworld and shifting the dynamics of the reapers and #affecting the lives of those around him and not only impacting a demon but winding the very core of one around himself #he dissappears. he dies. he is consumed. and it's the thing he wanted all along * and it's the human trajectory of a rushing brilliant life #that bleeds into others and drags them along with it #and sebastian - the demon. the immortal - seems to return to the status quo of eternity. the endless lapse where he was before their #contract - the boredom and the hunger - and it seems to have come full circle but he's gone back a subtly different shape and he cannot make #himself back to how he was (nor do i think he would want to because he knows what he is and its a dreadful suicidal upheaval to want to undo #what you are - almost psychological suicide when all you are is that understanding of yourself - and because it would mean undoing himself #from ciels influence and that is the crux of what defines him and that is such a tricky trap to be caught up in for the rest of time.
#dare i say one common to many human experiences. hes been permanently affected. he can't be just himself now) and he will not be able to rid #himself of that part always conscious of ciel and that hunger always conscious of his absence. that what it is ultimately - love has a very #human connotation even if it isn't inaccurate and affection and amusement and identity and respect are all there - but ultimately i think it #all derives from hunger. the core definition of the devourer and now - from sebastian refining that hunger through an aesthetic to suit his #palate to the thing he was cultivating to suit and sate that hunger at its apex - that hunger has forever changed. the shape of his hunger - #the shape of his drive has forever changed into the shape of ciels soul and his want for it. and now he has had it and his hunger remains #and it cannot have either ciels soul nor simply his company and to be deprived of what it aches for wizens it furiously into the shape of #its absence all the more. #* - what ciel wants is encouraged by sebastian and he has been made into his shape on pain of a death to early to possess his goal.
