“Ah.” I pause. Jay is sitting on his bed in the hotel room cross-legged in a nest of sheets. Because Jay thinks sheets might be sad if he doesn’t hug them all. Which probably is everything anyone really needs to know about an eleven year old kid from far Outside the universe. “You’re not out looking for Pokemon on your phone?”
“Nope! I’m writing,” he says proudly with a huge grin.
“What are you writing?” I ask.
“Oh!” Jay looks down at his phone, then up at me. “Lots of words, Charlie. Over 9000 so far!”
“And you are writing about –?” I prod.
“Me, only it’s not really me because it is me,” he says, and being Jay expects that to make sense.
I count to ten, at least glad it was me and not the wandering magician who learned this. Magician or not, I’m not sure he knows what fanfic even is, or undersands it all that well. “A fanfic about?”
“Well, me of course, because I am a big fan of me, which makes the story even more jaysome.”
“Of course it does. And you managed over 9000 words?”
“I do have lots of adventures,” he boasts. “And – oh, right. I was doing research and I need some help with it. Because I think the cloning machine in the story works, but I need your help making the scene work?”
“Story-you made a clone of you in the story?” He nods. “What do you need help with?”
I stare at Jay. Go to speak. Find nothing.
He falls over in a fit of giggles. “I totally got you with a jayjoke!”
I throw the nearest thing I find at his head, which turns out to be a lamp.
Jay moves aside in a blur, still laughing, and informs me he’d never slash fiction because that might hurt it but he bets he could do the best fanfic of me.
I’m not as fast as Jay by any means. But I am motivated, and I almost grab his phone before he vanishes with it to some other location. I yank out my phone and check Jay’s tumblr, and then his facebook page he thinks I don’t know about. He actually had wrote fanfic about me, writing that everyone should do fictions about their bestest friends.
He would probably change his thoughts if he knew what I was thinking right now. Or perhaps not, given Jay. I read the stories, turn my phone off. It wouldn't be hard to figure out Jay’s password, so I make a mental note to write some interesting fanfics in his name the next time he annoys me.
Which will probably be before the day is over.
