T.W:Just me venting, a lot.
Im so worried I know I know I'm going to fail, but I don't want to lose my GPA. It's very important to me because it's the only thing I have that's truly mine, and what hurts the most is that I'm, in a way, "naturally talented." I don't need to study; I just listen, that's it. But I haven't been able to do that for a long time, and it makes me feel terrible because it made me feel special, and that makes me feel like I'm not special anymore. My feelings are so complex and whatever I try to talk about them, adults or people of my age react the same way because they aren't the feelings that are socially acceptable, I have been literally called narcissist and sociopath for that and these two arent bad things, also I dislike the misinformation about the personality disorders such as Sociopathy or Narcissism. Because a person is a Sociopath does mean is a bad evil person but I'm getting off topic.
I hate that people can give me The comfort I need, because I can understand everyone else, but they can't do the same for me. I understand that other people's emotions are complicated, but that doesn't change how annoying it is that when it comes to MY FEELINGS, MY SITUATIONS, THERE'S NOTHING AND NO ONE CAN TAKE A MOMENT TO LISENT TO ME AND THEY GIVE THAT LOOK OF DISSAPOINTENT AND DISGUST WHEN THEY REALIZAD THAT IM NOT THE NOEMI CARING, INTELIGENT AND NICE THAT I CAN BE WORSE I DONT LIKE THEN ANYMORE. AND I DONT WANT TO PRAY FOR HOW I FEEL BECAUSE ITS MAKE ME FEEL LIKE SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME AND NEED FIXED AND I ALREDY KNOW THAT SOMETHING ROTTING ON MY IS WRONG I KNLW THAT IM DIFFERENT.
Anyways, ignore my descent into madness i just wanted to vent.