#simonla rosechu

[paperstarzz]

I’ve been binging the Geno Samuel documentary, so I drew Simonla Rosechu (and a gem from the CwCki)

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[taffysannotatedsonichu]

Sonichu 11 Page 60

SANDY: I’m sorry too, Uncle Simonchu.

WILD: Wow! I had no idea that was going on there too. My dad suffered a similar fate with Team Rocket.

WILD: I am really sorry for you, man.

SANDY: What did you do after all that?

SIMON: Well, Sandy, after being set free, I pursued my interest in fossils and geology. Feeling banned from Virginia, I started a new life in West Virginia. It’s not a swift. I recieved the invitation from Simonla on my phone yesterday, shortly after uncovering this Razor Claw and this fossil. I figured I’d revive the fossil while I was here.

WILD: Hmm. I know someone who’d appreciate this. May I take the Razor Claw to him as a gift?

SIMON: Sure, Wild. I have no use for it.

WILD: Cool.

SANDY: I would like to guide you to the CWCville museum for your fossil restoration, Uncle Simon.

SIMON: Thank you, Sandy; that is very kind of you.

Wild and Sandy suddenly realize they’ve been jerks and Wild particularly empathizes with Simon’s abuse because his father was similarly forced to perform evil under the wing of Team Rocket.

Simon ends his story with what he’s been doing since his release from prison, seeing that he was acquitted due to being coerced into the crime. He felt “banned from Virginia”, despite him walking off scot-free, seemingly not getting much attention in the media, given how little of a role he plays in Sonichu 10, what’s presumably the CWCville gvt’s official public record of the events, and CWCville events seemingly being of little importance to the rest of the state of Virginia. He left to the mountainous Appalachian region of West Virginia, a fresh start away from his abusers in Virginia and Minnesota, and a place for him to fulfill his passion - digging for fossils. He now looks forward to a future where he’s on speaking terms with his sister, brother-in-law, and niece.

Simon’s two gifts are the crux of the conflict of this issue - a Razor Claw, a holdable item in Pokemon games used primarily to evolve Sneasels into Weaviles (provided they hold it while leveling up at night), and an unknown fossil. Were it not for the unforgettable arrival of Bananasaurus, birthed from this fossil, and Reginald finding his new Weavile form monstrous, this episode would have ended here and now.

[cwcisgod]

Some more Chris-tory for you guys: Simonchu was a character created by the troll Evan George, based on the character of Simon from Gurren Lagann. Evan created Simonchu thinking he was terrible enough for CWC to feature him in the comic. He was right, but instead Chris turned Simonchu into Simonla Rosechu.

Chris made Simonchu female so that he could pair her off with Wild Sonichu. Chris denied any wrongdoing, and eventually lied and said that Simonla was entirely his own creation. So Evan (rightfully) called out Chris for stealing his character, and got a bunch of other trolls together to pressure and harass Chris into killing off Simonla in the comic. CWC did so in Sonichu #10, where Evan George and Simonchu blow her up with a voltorb.

[taffysannotatedsonichu]

Sonichu 11 Page 58

Caption: 30 minutes later…

SIMON: Hmmm!! That was some really good soup, and my nerves needed the celery. Thank you. And thanks again so much for forgiving me. You’re good for my sister, Wild. Any you two made a very spirited kid. 

SIMON: Ahhh… I was not as fortunate, though. I was forraging for berries for my family…

SIMON: Evan caught me as a Sonee from behind with a Quick Ball.

SIMON: He and his crew force-evolved me to something of their M.S. Paint “design”.

Screen: Troll-velution 3.5

SIMON: I was not the only one caught for their “collection”.

SIMON: They “trained” us with abusive attacks from their level 100 Beedrills.

SIMON: We were all kept locked in cages; mentally dumbed-down with videos of the seriously mentally-challenged.

Man on TV: Duh-er!

SIMON: Over the time, I’ve heard talk of a familiar name. My sister Simonla. I tried to contact her. I found her number on the CWCville Construction Company’s website. I sent her links to the videos of Evan abusing me.

After Simon comes to his senses, he monologues his entire life story to Wild and Sandy, who have presumably seen very little of him aside from immediately following Simonla’s “death”. His life thus far has been rather tragic: as a Sonee (a yellow Sonee, notably, granting further credence to my theory that most Sonees/Roseys are supposed to be yellow/pink respectively, then evolve into their primary element’s color) he was kidnapped by Evan and then forcibly evolved, brutally trained with other EHPs, and they were forced to dull their senses and intelligence. Despite the fact that by 2017 when this was written Evan had long left the trolling sphere and Chris’s feud with him was over, Chris continues to add false charges to his quote-unquote “rap sheet”. What is Chris doing, continuing to paint Evan as an animal abuser behind his back? Given that Chris’s fervor towards him had otherwise subsided, is it possible that he wrote Evan like this in a rare display of continuity, since Evan’s character was established during the period of loathing? Notably, Simon says that Evan forced him to fight with Beedrills, the Pokemon species that Evan claimed was the inspiration for Simon’s drills (seeing as Chris wouldn’t have gotten the Gurren Lagann reference).

Simon did make attempts to reach apparently his only living family member (despite saying he was foraging for his family earlier), Simonla. Apparently, according to this weird wording, Simon sent Simonla videos of Evan’s abuse over the phone, because the only thing he mentions is having Simonla’s phone number from the CWCville Construction site. Even if we are meant to assume that he also got her email there, he tried to reach her through her work email and not a personal one, though she did reply sympathetically, according to the next page. I question though how Simon was able to record videos of the Asperpedia Four abusing him. This was 2008, when cell phone video cameras were rather primitive, and given Evan’s other treatment of him I don’t know why Evan would let him even have a cell phone. Apparently, according to the next page, Simon used one of the A4’s phones, but how then did they not notice Simon stealing their phones to record their abuse and later alert his sister?

“Duh-er” calls to mind “D’oh”, the catchphrase of Homer Simpson.

[taffysannotatedsonichu]

Sonichu 11 Page 48

BLAKE: *clears throat*

CHRIS: Yes, Blake?

BLAKE: Beggin’ your pardon miss, but… nice rack.

CHRIS: Thanks Blake. But, don’t get any ideas.

BLAKE: Of course not! Believe me, I was more durprised now than when I heard of what you have been, Miss Chandler!

CHRIS: Quite, Blake.

Blake gives Chris an awkward comment about his newly enlarged breasts, despite the fact that Blake is married to Bubbles by this point. Chris probably did this to make it seem like the new, female him was not only more physically attractive than his former male self but more physically attractive in general. I question why it was Blake who hit on him, rather than, say, the newly single Punchy or Chris’s future husbando Magi-Chan. If I was Bubbles I’d have slapped Blake in the face for saying that.

At the bottom of the page, everyone, including Chris’s parents, pose for a picture outside his house. Bob had been dead for going on six years at this point, and 2017 Barb looked much more decrepit than she does in this photo, hinting these were taken from pictures taken many many many years prior hidden away somewhere on the Chandlers’s computer.

[taffysannotatedsonichu]

Sonichu 11 Page 57

SIMONLA: I can’t believe you two! Simon was not the one who planted and detonated the bomb! 

SIMONLA: Alec did that! Magi-Chan told me while I was bedridden!

SIMONLA: I had forgiven Simon; he genuinely felt bad and sad about what happened.

SIMONLA: I expect you both to forgive my brother too.

SIMONLA: Simonchu was a victim of poor circumstances!

SIMONLA: And I want you both to put that mess behind you, and apologize to Simonchu right…

SIMONLA: Sandy, go get the first aid kit and smelling salts from the bathroom.

SIMONLA: And, Wild, fix up some soup; lots of celery on the side.

SIMONCHU: Zzz

Simonla explains to her husband and daughter what should have been painfully clear to them almost immediately after her murder attempt - that Simonchu was not in any way responsible for her near-death and that they were crazy psychos for trying to kill him over a murder that did not happen that he did not take meaningful part in. Wild, despite clearly having not forgiven Simon last page, claims that he’d forgiven Simon due to his remorse.

Simonla, laying by her fallen brother’s side, orders Wild to fix him celery soup and Sandy to help her wake him up with the help of smelling salts.

[taffysannotatedsonichu]

Sonichu 11 Page 47

SONICHU, ROSECHU, WILD, BUBBLES, PUNCHY, ANGELICA, MAGI, BLAKE, SIMONLA, SANDY, ZAPINA, AND SILVANA: Merry Christmas, Christine!

CHRIS: Sonichu, Rosechus, merry Christmas to you all too. What’s up? “Welcome back, Christine”?

ROSECHU: We all realized we’ve never celebrated your return from the future, and we unanimously decided to come over and celebrate. 

SONICHU: We’ve all missed you the many months. Heck, it felt like years!

CHRIS: That is really sweet! I love you all! You all are family to me. Please, come in.

Cake: Welcome back, Christine

Returning to the fumetti style seen in Issues 6 and 10, the EHP squad arrives at Chris’s real front door to give him a cake. The photos were taken in May of 2017, hence the trees being green and Chris wearing short sleeves, while the rest of the crew looks incredibly over-dressed, still in their Christmas coats. If Chris cared about consistency, he could have either covered the trees with fake snow (it’s literally a bundle of cotton, it’s not that expensive) or edited snow in Photoshop when he put in the speech bubbles. But alas, Chris assumed no one would notice or care, so this ostensibly yuletide scene is surrounded by May trees. There’s literally a big purple flower behind Simonla’s head.

It’s obviously the same slack-jawed picture of Chris in panel 1 and panel 2, although there appears to be a little Photoshopping on his arms and necklace.

[taffysannotatedsonichu]

Sonichu 11 Page 53

SIMON {thought}: Seriously?! She invites me over after all that?!

SIMON: Alright, I’ll go over. I’ll hear their shouts.

SIMON {thought}: Take the Razor Claw and fossil with me.

Caption: August 18, 2008

JUDGE SLACK LEWIS: …I hereby sentence the four of them to reside in an Amish community; no technology access…

JUDGE SLACK LEWIS: …of their lives! And their Pokemon are to be released, after being healed of their former trainers’ abuse!…

JUDGE SLACK LEWIS: In our local Pokemon Centers and community centers! All of their other possessions and property are to be sold at auction! Court is adjourned!

WILD: If you ever come near me or Sandy again, I will cut and Vine Whip you up!

WILD: You rotten, lousy, pathetic murderer!!!

Caption: Present day… December 18, 2008

Caption: 2:00 PM

SFX: Bing-bong

SIMON: Hey, sis.

SIMONLA: Come on down, bro.

Simonchu is aware that coming over to Simonla’s house is not a wise idea, though he decides to visit anyway, bringing the Razor Claw and fossil with him as presents to hopefully appease his still-bitter brother-in-law and niece.

Simon has a flashback to the (retconned version of) the Asperpedia Four’s trial. We are shown that despite seemingly being an accomplice in Sonichu 10, he is not among the defendants (it’s possible that all his charges were dropped when it was made known he was coerced, or possibly there is no way to charge Electric Hedgehog Pokemon of crimes.) Regardless, Judge Slack Lewis outlines his fate - to be released into the wild, alongside the Asperpedia Four’s other Pokemon, after getting healed up at a Pokemon Center. All their non-sapient possessions  have been seized by police and are set to be auctioned off at a police auction.

Despite walking off scot-free, Simonchu is still not out of the woods (pun not intended) since Wild, even though this is set in a universe where Simonla did not die, is still furious to the point of threatening Simonchu’s life should he ever show his face again to Wild or Sandy (but, notably, not Simonla, even though, again, she’s still alive). Wild threatens to use his signature Vine Whip attack on him, even though in the Pokemon games the move being incredibly weak at only a 45 power (meaning it is generally only used by lower-level Pokemon and replaced by a more powerful move as soon as possible). Wild calls Simonchu a murderer, despite him being exonerated of the crime, and once again let me stress that Simonla’s still alive.

The day after receiving Simonla’s text, Simon arrives at the Wild household, presumably after digging for the entire night. Luckily for Simon, the first face he sees is a friendly one, Simonla.