Doubting/ Bo Sinclair
You were curled up in a pathetic ball on the sofa, your tired eyes drifting closed as each flash and blare of the late night TV show weakened your resolve to stay awake.
He had promised he would be back tonight, at least at a slightly reasonable time and not completely sodden with whiskey for your big anniversary dinner.
The food you'd prepared had long gone cold, and the beautiful burgundy lingerie that complimented your skin so well underneath your clothes felt scratchy now, a painful reminder of your attempts at an evening.
With your resentment growing with each tick of the clock, you felt a simmering pot of anger begin to tip over in your stomach.
Pointless, pointless, pointless.
When flipping channels became too mindless you gave up, dragging your body worn upstairs into the empty bed, crying silently into the sheets once you had finally given up hope, smearing mascara over your pillow in regret at your futile attempts to coach romance out of your idiotic drunken mess of a man.
When you awoke Bo was in bed beside you, slumped on his back snoring, his trousers half off, hanging haphazardly off his legs as he had obviously drunkenly passed out before he had managed the final step.
You scoffed, pulling yourself up and mooching into the kitchen to make yourself coffee, barely managing to dredge up a smile for poor Vincent.
"Make me one while you're at it love," Bo grunted from behind you, rubbing his eyes as he woke up.
You smelt the searing stench of whiskey that still clung to him, and almost felt your heart stop when you got a whiff of women's perfume.
He wouldn't dare.
Something buried deep in your body snapped, a desperation to hurt him, to lash out and to make him feel a fraction of the way you felt rose to the surface and jealously reared it's ugly head.
"No," you snapped, turning around to glare at him, clutching your mug in one hand and resisting the urge to throw the scalding liquid in his face.
He looked taken aback at your seething anger, moving to cup your face in his large hand.
"What's wrong sweetheart? Not your time of the month is it?" He snickered, still pushing at what he thought was your playful frustration.
You sniffed, pushing his grip off your cheek.
"No, you bloody ape. Just get off me. I don't want to look at your fucking face,"
Your outburst was a shock to all the brothers,
Vincent who had hidden himself from sight as soon as you snapped, Lester who had come in the kitchen unawares and especially Bo.
Your patience and gentle demeanour you always showed towards him had vanished in your bitter hurt and he wondered why the biting harsh words you'd said made his stomach ache with sadness.
You never swore when you were angry, you never lashed out like that preferring to deal with things diplomatically and sensibly, teasing his temperamental anger.
You went to hang out with Vincent in the basement to calm down, still nursing your coffee, though it did nothing to soothe the pounding of adrenaline in your ears.
You didn't particularly like what he did, but it was quiet down there and cool, and you could watch him work in silence, no expectation of stilted conversation. He was too shy for that.
Vincent didn't mind, he enjoyed your company in a strange way, in solitude you two had bonded although you didn't get much of it.
You had assumed Bo was off sulking, or consorting with whatever sleazy woman he had picked up at the bar and jumped when you heard his loud voice bouncing of the stairway walls, shouting for you to "come up this instant and stop messing 'im about,"
You weren't over the moon about it, but you came up, blood boiling in your ears, knowing that disobeying him would not be wise, especially in his volatile mood.
"Look whatever I did, I'm sorry okay? I don't like you shouting at me. Let's go back to normal," he said, his eyebrows furrowing as an almost pout graced his chapped lips.
He cupped your chin softly, thumbing your lip gently with a coarse finger.
You felt your traitorous body react without you consent and you leaned in to his gentler touch.
It was only when the thought of his rough hands on a bottle, on someone else, cupping another's chin with a frightening tenderness did your mood sour and you gut wrench.
"You couldn't even make it home for our dinner," you whispered, afraid to break the silence with your voice and his frown deepened, a wave of confusion sweeping his features.
"I reminded you so many times, I even WARNED you this would happen and still, you go out drinking. I'm sat at home with a fuckin' lovely meal cooked for you while you're out with whores. I look like a damn fool Bo," You were met with silence, as the cogs slowly turned in his head.
He huffed, letting your face go as he shook his arms around.
"So I missed a dinner baby, we'll do it again tonight,"
"Worst thing is, you don't even remember it was our anniversary," He paled a little as you carried on with your speech, ranting to him about how upset you were as he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, his eyes searching your face guiltly.
"I didn't mean to baby, I'll make it up to you, I promise," he leered, a arm moving to snake around your waist and his puckered lips coming up to meet your neck, pressing gentle kisses as the hand resting at your waist squeezed your hip.
"Get off Bo," you snarled, shrugging him off.
"I don't want to fuck you right now. Belive it or not you can't have a fuckin' relationship just based on lust,"You said, your voice steadily rising in frustration. You tried to calm down as best as you could , spotting Vincent scurrying away from the conflict out the corner of your eye.
"Could have fooled me," he muttered and you scoffed indignantly.
"What the hell do you want me to do then? I forgot alright? I'm human," He scoffed, his fists clenching as waves of anger seemed to roll off him, making your anxiety spike.
It scared you when he got like this, his anger was unparalleled, and while you hoped he would never hurt you, he was dangerous.
"You love me right Bo?" You whispered, watching as his jaw tightened in frustration and he stepped further away from you in reflex.
The echoing silence that followed was answer enough and you swallowed the aching tears that burned at the back of your throat.
You turned on your heel away from him, striding out of your house and into the town of Ambrose.
You hid yourself in a little alcove of an oak tree by Vincent's museum, you doubted even Lester would find you here and mentally kicked yourself.
You asked the question you knew not to ask, the deeply bottled insecurity that surrounded your crumbling relationship spilling out.
Bo was complicated, and while you told yourself he would have to care for you a little to keep you around, there were days were it felt like he hated you and your stomach would pang with a deep ache that he would never love you like you loved him.
The gentle evening sun hitting your face did little to cheer you up.
"You're blocking my sun," you said, your eyes still fluttered closed as you hoped the tear tracks left on your cheeks weren't obvious to him.
"Y/N.."
"Yeah, yeah I'm not going anywhere I'm just hiding out here for a bit," He grumbled something unintelligible as you got up, too tired to fight with him and too emotionally exhausted to listen to his possessive spiel.
"Where are you going?" His words drifted across the wind towards you as you turned around, sighing.
"I don't know Bo. Alright?"
You tried not to think about how forlorn he looked left in the spot you'd been sat in, and you really tried not to think about how much you wanted to forgive him then, that voice that belonged to insecurities piping up louder this time.
You awoke the next morning to the smell of freshly brewed coffee and frowned in sleepy surprise, shaking the rest of your dreams from your mind.
It was too late for it to be Vincent and feeling around beside you Bo was missing beside you.
"I made you a cup," he said, in a grumbly voice as you stood shocked, having managed to make your way into the kitchen.
He never made you coffee, he always said his tastes like cat piss, but you knew it was just laziness on his part.
"Thanks," you said, taking the mug from him with a moment of hesitation, staring at him in slight disbelief.
The next few days was spent with little kindnesses.
He washed the dishes, he watched a chick flick movie with you, he even let you wear his corduroy jacket with little complaints.
You finally snapped one evening, curled up under his arm. You'd barely spoken about what he'd done, or the uncomfortable revelation you'd uncovered but the air was thick with tension and your heart hurt everytime his eyes trailed to yours.
"why are you being so nice?" It wasn't that Bo treated you horribly but he was never... nice.
You knew you weren't getting the normal boyfriend experience when you got yourself into this mess and you hadn't cared all that much but you wondered if the constant negligence had worn down your standards just a little.
He looked like he'd rather be anyone else as you confronted him but you gave him a stern look, emphasising you WOULD press it if he didn't tell you.
"I want to show you I care for you. 'Am no romantic, but I do love you, I do," He muttered awkwardly, his eyes you loved so much staring up at you, for the first time vacant of all mischief and bitterness.
You felt your heart well up against your will, the caterpillars in your stomach evolving into butterflies as he grinned at you.
Then it hit you, what had sealed it for you, the smell.
The woman's perfume. "W-what about the girl?" You said, your eyes turning up to catch his stare as you caught the sneaking hand stroking your hair in an iron grip.
"What girl?" He scoffed, narrowing his eyes at you in suspicion, as you glared at him.
"The scent on your clothes, I smelt it. Where you with someone else, on our anniversary?" You choked a little when you got it out, wincing in embarrassment at your own emotion.
"That was nothing, darling, I promise you you know I wouldn't do that to your pretty ass. I got you something for our anniversary and I couldn't decide. The stupid woman kept spraying me when I couldn't decide," He muttered and you giggled out of pure relief, watching as he scrambled to pull out a box of perfume, which just so happened to be your favourite.
"I love you too Bo," you squeaked out wrapping your arms around him in a crushing hug.
"Yeah alright sweetheart don't get carried away," he grunted but you saw the hidden upturn of his lips, that he barely concealed from your watchful eyes. P
"Now can I get laid?" He grinned and you smacked his arm reproachfully, though fully intending to give in later that evening.
I'm really proud of this! I hope you Bo fans enjoy :)
