#sinister stranger

[fysamspruell]

Sam Spruell as John in Sudden Light (2020) via Festival-Cannes

[wonder-my-wunderlust-blog]

A stolen ring, fear of spiders, and a sinister stranger.

The cafe was a small hole in the wall of no particular consequence that was run by a Scandinavian gentleman who had only a passing interest in the royal wedding and no interest in any other wedding besides. He took to wiping the counters and reading the paper in turns. The cafe itself was clean but poorly lit  and there was no television to be had. 

 I have had enough talk of weddings to last me several decades and I’m afraid that should I ever get married I would hardly enjoy talking of it as much as I have talked about Margret’s wedding since her engagement. Her first engagement. Not her scandalous elopement. Though it may seem that I’m being harsh on Margret for her silliness. do not mistake that for loyalty to the groom to be. He unsettles me and I cannot blame Margret for likewise feeling unsettled.

Her fiancé is very much like a spider, all reaching limbs an almost calculating countenance. He has of late even taken to sitting in the corner of whatever room he is in. I am not horribly afraid of spiders for as long as i can see the expanse of their web I know how to leave such beings alone and they do likewise. Margret, however, is deathly afraid of spiders. Once her love of this gentleman sobered (as it does with time) she started to subconsciously draw parallels between the man she was to part only in death and the thing she feared most on earth.

No, the reason I could not condone my sister's conduct was not because I believed she should marry her fiancé, for I had hardly known him two months before their engagement and felt that there was something sinister about his features from the beginning. I could not tolerate her running away. She was understandably frightened but one should avoid blind panic when confronted with that which frightens them. Fear leads to far too much stupidity in my opinion and that it was my own sister that acts so stupidly, disappoints and irritates me.But then I wonder what it must be like for my dear Margret. What could it be like to be married to that fear until the end of your days? To have fear multiply itself in its physical absence and cling to you like thousands of tiny spiders weaving you shackles of paralysis and anxiety? How far must one run to out run fear? How far does fear's web extend? Would she ever be able to escape it? And at that point what is she afraid of? The spider or the web?