“This can’t go on like this! You’re not eating, you’re not sleeping, you barely talk!”
♞ — ( sentence starters ) // accepting
@sirenxmi
“Minki…” For a small moment, that’s all that he says, all that he can manage as he sits in the corner of the couch, an unlit cigarette between his fingers, his lighter in the other hand and a folder of paperwork in his lap. Those were the only things he had been managing — smoking and working for tireless, terrible amounts of time. It was all he could do to keep himself put together…even if that was turning into unhealthy, thoughtless coping methods.
But he couldn’t continue to do this, to himself, and more importantly to Minki. Everything couldn’t continue to be like this.
He was hard-headed, and stubborn, and he couldn’t count the amount of times he had dismissed comments and concerns about his own personal behavior, keeping the weight of his guilt to himself. Even if that had meant wearing himself thin — he couldn’t be bothered to be concerned with himself, not after what he had done..even if there technically wasn’t a “choice” for him.
He could have negotiated, found another way to recruit without raising suspicion, he could have at least shared it with Minki sooner than it had been; as soon as he had gotten instruction. But he hadn’t.
But nothing was going to be fixed if he continued to act and think like this, if he continued to avoid everything at hand —and not do anything about it. Damage had inevitably already been done, but it would only get worse if everything was kept in silence.
“Could we talk then?” The cigarette, lighter, and folder were all moved off to the side table before he finally looks up at Minki. “Please…”