@skybreakr says, " do you remember your nightmares ? "
she doesn't wake up screaming, but she wakes in a cold sweat feeling like she isn't herself. and sometimes, in her dreams, she's not. she can't tell who she is. where she is. beneath the shadow of the monolith and drained of any semblance of life, she watches a fight that she's not part of. she doesn't know these people, but the pain she feels in her chest as she watches is real. betrayal in action. some of dance she's not privy to understanding. something like pained resolve painted across the woman's face and something like deep remorse painted across the man's.
she doesn't understand what she's watching, but her heart bleeds all the same. from her position as a god, watching a play. from her place of knowing without knowing. does she exist in this dream?
stories of betrayal can't exist without some form of love.
it's there and it's bleeding out. he touches her shoulder and guides her down to the ground and she dies there, looking up at him.
maelle can't look away, even if she wanted to. she's forced to perceive, to carry this burden of heaviness that she doesn't understand.
and then, she's doubled over beneath the glowing numbers and screaming. the sort of scream born from a grief that can't be put into word and studied. a ribbon drifts, idly, blood tainting the breeze. a massacre has happened.
she wakes and she's maelle again and her throat feels like she's been screaming for hours now.
lune finds her, as she often can be found, alone and staring out at nothing, looking for answers that will never form. the others are asleep, or as asleep as they're allowed to be given everything happening around them. maelle can't shake the feeling she's being watched from somewhere beyond the scope of her range of sight. something in the shadows. someone.
a brief smile is exchanged, lune's understanding and maelle's tired. they sit there in silence before the inevitable question. she can see it forming on lune's face before she asks and while she doesn't intend to sound clipped in response, she is.
impulsive, instinctive. one of the teachers back in the academy would've scolded her for not thinking before she leaps.
"are you only asking so you can pick them apart and try to understand what secret they'll reveal to you if i do? some perfect path to the monolith and our success, just... tucked away in my head! ready for the picking!" residual ache causes her to rub at the center of her chest and she refuses to turn her gaze to lune again, focusing instead on those same glowing numbers that dog each and every one of their steps. maelle could leave it at that. ideally, she should. "just... leave me alone," softer then, between her teeth and with a subtle shift of her shoulders. "please. i don't feel like being analyzed."