high af reader legitimately thinking slasher konig is a huge ass bear as he murders her friends
"oh damn..that's large ass bear"
konig covered in blood and guts : ".."
Slasher!Konig who actually thinks it was a compliment. Come on, this guy never heard a nice word in his life - this, combined with his fucked up views on love and affection, makes him think that your screams of terror are actually affectionate moans, and your pleads for mercy are just indicating your arousal. So, when you really think he is a bear for a hot minute, and you yell it to the people in your group...yep, everything checks out - you're madly in love. You're showering him in compliments. You adore him. Only when he rips off your friend's arm with nothing but a huge ass knife - and you're pretty sure that bears do not use knives, even the big ones - you realize it's a man. A really big, scary man. Covered in blood and guts, leaning closer to you with the most crazed look in his eyes, his bloody hands reaching to grab your... "Danke, Schatzen. Didn't know you could be so adorable" He grabs you by the scruff of your neck, like a kitten. Flips you over his shoulder like a bag of potatoes, so your nose presses right into something that feels like a pile of guts clinging to his uniform, and you'd throw up right on his boots, but a firm hand on your butt makes you freeze. Dead in your tracks. This guy is definitely not a bear, but can rival one in the sheer size - you hate to admit it, but you're almost impressed at just how fucking big he is. Too big. You don't want to admit it, of course, but the guy of his size shouldn't be this fucking big. Konig thinks it was all flirt. He finally found himself a perfect pretty wife who actually prefers her husband to be bloody and covered in guts, and that calling him a bear is sort off a weird nickname. He doesn't really care - he adores this too fucking much.
