#sleepless: task

[rhysomalley]

♛  jidenna // bambi ♛

“ don’t get too near for there’s lions, beware.

sometimes i hide. when you facetime, i text you back a lie, cause i’m afraid to look back in your eyes. i’m terrified you were love of my life. “

♕ zayn // drunk ♕

“ run away now like we’re supposed to do. take you to the back now, i take a shot for you. wasted every night, gone for every song, faded every night, dancing all night long “

♛ the 1975 // m.o.n.e.y. ♛

“ new clothes, bloody nose powders and walking back home. has he got enough weed? no, broken phone retching on the floor alone. “

♕ childish gambino // redbone ♕

“ too late. you wanna make it right, but now it’s too late. my peanut butter chocolate cake with kool-aid. i’m trying not to waste my time. ”

♛ elliott smith // twilight ♛

“ you don’t deserve to be lonely, but those drugs you’ve got won’t make you feel better. pretty soon you’ll find it’s the only little part of your life you’re keeping together. “

♕ childish gambino // heartbeat ♕

“ are we dating ? are we fucking ? are we best friends ? are we something in between that ? i wish we never fucked and i mean that.  not really - you say the nastiest shit in bed and it’s fuckin’ awesome. “

♛  kid cudi // soundtrack to my life ♛

“ i am happy - that’s just the saddest lie.

i’ve got some issues that nobody can see and all of these emotions are pouring out of me. i bring them to the light for you, it’s only right. “

[rhysomalley]

LOVE ; Love is kind of like when you see a fog in the morning, when you wake up before the sun comes out. It’s just a little while, and then it burns away… Love is a fog that burns with the first daylight of reality. 

I say to you, you will face pain in your life.

You may lose your limbs, bleed to death.

It is not aimed at anyone,

but it will come your way.

The wind sweeps over everyone.

The little girl in the red rain coat, her cheetah printed rain boots charged at Rhys. He had little time to prepare before they had both fallen in a big puddle. Red hair, freckles, and chubbier cheeks than a normal child will have, Rhys “the cabbage patch” knew he was in love. Rolling around in mud, endless laughter, and being scolded by parents from the stains in his clothes ;; that was love.

You will feel so all alone abandoned,

come to see that life is brief.

And you will cry, “No, it cannot be so,”

but nothing will avail you.

At the age of seventeen, Rhys started to grow into his own person. Freckles lightened, blending with his pale skin. Height matched his lean body, and green eyes bore all emotion. The girl in a striped cardigan, flower in her hair, brown hair flowing down her back, she used to wear a red rain coat and play with Rhys. She now avoids him. Rhys never knew he even found brown eyes the most beautiful thing in the world until he fell in love with a certain pair. Endless nights, sleepovers, growing up together, copying each others’ homework, and holding hands in the school hallways ;; that was love.

Pregnant at sixteen, offering to do anything to support her, that was love.

Rhys remembers spending two whole days in his home, in his bed alone, crying when her father had removed her from school. There was no word from her for a few months and when he finally saw her again, she wasn’t pregnant ;; that was his first heart break.

You must bare your heart and expect nothing in return.

You must respond totally to nature.

You must return to your simple self.

So long as you love your own true simple selves,

you are not alone.

Meeting a man with raven colored hair, eyes bluer than the sea lit a fire inside of Rhys. Worthlessness, days of anxiety, restless feeling inside his bones, electrified body language,  and constant suspense ;; that had become love.

And the second time he felt heart break was somehow worse than the first.

To be serious is to be simple;

to be simple is to love.

The rains are pounding, the winds driving.

The breeze is gentle and the grass burns.

The earth is dusty. Go ankle deep in mud.

The disappointment he feels is crippling. Rhys and love had never really had a good relationship, but love somehow always conquers everything. Hopefulness, marriages and hand holding, that one smile you have for that certain someone, the adventures, and the first person you’d want to tell every single thing to ;; that is love now. 

And Rhys will have it.