#sleepy speaking

[sleepydrownedrat]

White people. Mass media. Internet users. Shut the fuck up about "sk[rest of the name cut out so I can preserve my poiny but also not be culturally insensitive if you don'tknow what this refers to uh look it up]." That's not. Well okay one you're entirely wrong about the concept and two stop co opting indigenous culture into your own "quirky" bullshit fuck you. This also goes for the other thing white people stole from my tribe's culture and took it to mean "scary monster 😨" that I'm not saying on account of yknow. Part of the point and the actual thing behind it is that you're not supposed to say the name. And I for one respect my culture I wish other people did too. Treat native cultures with the respect they deserve. Fucker.

[izukumidoriyahere]

(( I kinda want to different kinds of Deku on this blog but idk should I??? Like I really want to do villain deku, support course deku, pro hero deku, etc.))

[sleepydrownedrat]

Am i allowed to have someone tongue-fucking a throat wound they made in another person in my story or is that too much

[sleepydrownedrat]

Have now officially made multiple people in my theater group get on this hellsite.

I guess this is my legacy, to be the deadbeat dirtbag tumblr addict older sister

I'm okay with this

I love my friends

[sleepydrownedrat]

Tell me why I just got the instinct to run away from the fuckign nurses assistant in the doctors office. She was literally just going to take my blood pressure why was I struck with fear

[sleepydrownedrat]

The hardest part of music for me is coming up with ideas for things, not because of lack of material, but because of something I can't quite place.

It could be a lack of practice making it difficult to make things that my post-irony addled brain thinks aren't stupid. This is fair.

It could be just that starting out is hard, an empty project is a brick wall, et cetera. Sure, that's fair. And I'm all by myself so that doesn't help.

But what I'm thinking of at the moment, it's like. There's a block in my head that prevents me thinking about things that I would otherwise write about. That makes it difficult. There's also the thoughts of 'it wasn't that bad and bitching about it is just going to make you look like a stuck up privileged piece of shit' which is I think somewhat related.

There is a sort of lack of emotional connection to my memories, a complete lack of associating myself in them and there is no emotion attached to them because they're not real, they're barely even there, and I can't think about them without something in my head shutting me down. I can actually feel it happening right now, this cutting off from my own thoughts and feelings and body, like I'm underwater, barely managing to write this. And if I'm trying to think like this, it doesn't work to be made into music because the shutdown inhibits that ability to both play music and negotiate the thoughts into words, but the raw thoughts themselves are impossible to turn into anything by themselves and I can't just make something because the emotional center of my brain is shut down so I can't use emotions to help me write. Then when I'm feeling functional again and can actually do things and the blanket is lifted, then I don't even remember anything I was thinking about or anything I'd remembered.. it's frustrating.

[sleepydrownedrat]

The whitest youtuber you know is spending half their video on the shittiest least flowing "intentionally" cringeworthy rap verse about video games or some shit

[sleepydrownedrat]

Girl who desperately wants to fit in and be cool with her friends that smoke so she devotes her nights to researching smoking weed so she theoretically knows everything about it so she doesn't look stupid when she actually smokes with them and they don't find out she's actually never done it before and is stupid