Random Ineffable Husbands HEADCANONS:
Crowley has other types of sunglasses, including some funny shaped ones, but he just like the ones he has the most.
Aziraphale isn't afraid of ducks, he just doesn't like them because one hit him in the face once.
Aziraphale CAN drive, he just doesn't because he's terrible at it.
Crowley once joked that if anyone suspects anything, they can say Aziraphale bested Crowley and made him a servant. Aziraphale did not find it funny at all.
Crowley does eat SOMETIMES, just not very oftern because, being a snake, he sometimes has to stretch his lower jaw to eat because chewing hurts his jaw, like it gets sore.
It's also really freaky to see him yawn when he's really tired. Only Aziraphale finds it cute.
Crowley only likes one thing anout winter: Aziraphale.
Aziraphale is ambidextrous.
Aziraphale likes all seasons, but dislikes summer and other warm times because that's when people try to buy something from him.
Gabriel and other archangels have visited Aziraphale's bookshop, but none of them have ever noticed Crowley as a snake watching from a banister; he disguised himself in snake form and hid.
After the bookshop was restored, Crowley has never trusted another candle, match, or lighter inside of the building, even having mini heart attacks whenever Aziraphale uses the stove.
One day particular day, when a very pushy customer tried to buy something, Crowley came up with an idea and SPRINTED INTO THE BOOKSHOP, SCREAMING THEY WERE BEHIND HIM. It confused the hell out of Aziraphale and the customer, but that's when they saw the 'blood' and injures on Crowley's face and body. The customer ran and Aziraphale closed up to tend to his 'friend,' and Crowley revealed the fake blood was really jelly and the bruises were just some dort he rubbed on to look beaten.
Aziraphale has thought about making the bookshop a mini museum so people stop trying to buy his stuff, but hasn't because he doesn't really know how he would get the books out of the displays to read them.
Crowley once gave Aziraphale a plant and saw it growing better than it ever had when he was caring for it. It both surprised and annoyed him.
Aziraphale once tried duck. It wasn't bad.
Even after their face swap, the two are still careful, because Heaven and Hell can be anywhere.
Neither like Gabriel for different reasons. Aziraphale simply dislikes him because he's condescending and thinks Aziraphale isn't doing his job, so he shouldn't be on Earth. Crowley full on hates him because he's a know-it-all asshole who thinks he's better than everyone.
Aziraphale can fight, and he's good at it, but he just chooses not to. Most of the time, at least.
Crowley doesn't fight because he can't fight. He has no idea how to. He's more of a trapper or a trickster, but if it ever comes down to it, he'll run and try to get his enemy defeated by their own volition.
Aziraphale called the Velvet Underground "B-Bop" because he once listened to B-Bop and hated it.
Crowley has thought about growing his hair back out, because Aziraphale can braid it, but still likes the short hair because Aziraphale ruffles it, so he had a dilemma.
Aziraphale has been to Paris since the revolution. MUCH better time.
The two once staged a fight a fight to look like they were enemies because Heaven and Hell sent more spies. What followed was a very close rendition of that "F*** you Tony! F*** you Ezekiel!" video.
It still worked.
Crowley doesn't eat like Aziraphale, but he does like a good steak from time to time.
Aziraphale once caught Crowley in his snake form, because he was cold, and the two ended up sleeping together near the fire, and I mean they shared a space together while sleeping.
