I wrote commentary for some of my favorite songs on my Fighting Winter playlist, if anyone is interested! Just comment or DM me for the link.
(My inner DJ/music muse would be absolutely thrilled if people showed an interest in her yapping about the songs she chose for the story and why, etc. 😆)
Also FYI there are spoilers in there, so if you want to read along to the music, I'd suggest listening and reading first, then reading the commentary for that chapter afterward for some behind the scenes context. Unless you don't mind spoilers...
Friends is the subunit song by Jimin and Taehyung (co-written and co-produced by Jimin) from Map of the Soul : 7 which was released in February 2020. Interestingly enough, the Korean title is actually 친구, a word that is only used for friends of the same age, which is how ARMY figured out that it had to be their subunit prior to the release of the album.
On a very surface level, Friends is about the bond between Jimin and Taehyung recounting different little stories over the years, including the now famous dumpling incident which was first presented to us as a conflict that merely took up a few hours. Actually though it was a conflict that grew big enough that Jimin and Taehyung barely spoke to each other for two weeks and it culminated in Jimin getting drunk with Yoongi and then meeting Taehyung at a park at 4 am to make up. Yes, the same park at 4 am that Taehyung and Namjoon sing about in 4 O’Clock. That song, like many suspected, really was about Jimin and Taehyung as well.
But, while Friends might seem simple and fun on the outside, especially due to the upbeat melody and anthem like chorus, I think there is far more to it than meets the eye. Stella Jang, who co-wrote the lyrics, said in an interview with K-Pop Herald that BigHit sent her an email which contained the song as well as long stories about Jimin’s and Taehyung’s bond and based on that she was supposed to write short lyrics. She also had a friend, who is an ARMY, help her truly understand the depth of their bond. That alone to me shows that this goes far deeper than most might assume, and others wish for it.
Hello my alien
We’re each other’s mystery
Would it be why it’s more special
This verse for me is very interesting, especially since Jimin reclaims a nickname that people used to call Taehyung by which he hated. Instead Jimin turned it into something endearing, something that now belongs to them instead of others. It’s also noteworthy that that specific line is in English, not Korean, and he says my alien, so basically telling the listener that he takes some kind of claim over Taehyung, connects them in a way that anyone would understand, and unmistakably highlights that he’s the only one to call him like this because Taehyung is special to him, much the way you’d call someone dear to you/someone you love by an endearment such as ‘my darling’ or ‘my love’.
More below the cut:
The mystery part could refer to the early days of their friendship, the times when they were just getting to know each other and trying to figure out their dynamic and each other in a more general sense. We know they almost instantly became friends, stuck to each other and spent a lot of time together, despite constantly getting in little fights, but perhaps those struggles were what made the end result that much more special to them. Interesting to note is also how Jimin once said that when he saw Tae for the first time he experienced many different emotions (he didn’t specify which ones though), and how to this day he remembers Tae only wearing those red shorts and snapback and how even then he already looked like an idol/celebrity.
But the line could also refer to something more recent, or something more overarching, like a secret about themselves that only they know about, that they share and guard together.
Someday, when these cheers die down, stay hey
Stay with me by my side
Forever, keep staying here, hey
and
Someday, when these cheers die down, stay hey
You are my soulmate
Forever, keep staying here, hey
You are my soulmate
These two might just be the most important parts of the song, and the ones that seem to be the hardest to swallow for some. This is basically Jimin and Taehyung asking each other to stay together forever, even when (or especially when) their careers will be over and BTS won’t be such a main and overarching reason for them to stay by each other anymore, so to speak. It implies that what they have is something they want to last forever, that it reaches far beyond them just being two best friends inside a group, but that they are rather two people who found ‘their person’ in each other. They know they’ve found something one of a kind, once in a lifetime, and want to hold on to it, to each other. It’s also them proclaiming and reminding everyone once again that they are soulmates, that this isn’t just something ARMY made up, some shipping agenda or anything like it, but that it is truly the title they see most fit for each other, that it basically feels like their bond was destiny and they were always meant to be together. You are my soulmate is also in English, something that every listener will understand, something so important they specifically made it this way so you wouldn’t need to look up translations from Korean to get it.
Sidenote--somehow soulmate has become a very debated term in connection to vmin so lets look at the definition for soulmate that wikipedia gives us: A soulmate is a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity. This may involve similarity, love, romance, platonic relationships, comfort, intimacy, sexuality, sexual activity, spirituality, compatibility and trust. Most of these are rather connected to the most traditional way in which people imagine soulmates, as in two people destined for each other, lovers perfect for one another. Of course there are friendship type soulmates, but those are far more rare in peoples minds. The point I’m getting at is that Jimin and Taehyung never defined which type of soulmate they are, and until I saw non-vminies have a fight about how they’re definitely just platonic ones, I never even really saw the word soulmate in connection with ‘platonic’. In a way you could argue that both sides are right, that they are both friendship soulmates but also romantic ones as well, their bond encompassing both. But in the end, of course, that’s something only they can confirm yet I thought I’ll mention it anyway.
Like your pinky,
we’re still the same
I know your everything
We must trust each other
Don’t forget
Instead of an obvious thank-you,
you and I —
let’s promise that we won’t fight tomorrow, for real
These lines may seem so simple, short and sweet, but I think there is a lot of meaning to them, a lot that’s written between the lines and potentially only something they understand the true extent of. I know your everything is another reminder that they are each others secret keepers, each others closest confidants, their person to go to and laugh or cry or celebrate with. Jimin and Taehyung have something that is rare, one of a kind, and it’s something beautiful that should be regarded with respect and wonder since it’s close to a miracle that they met and formed their bond in such a manner. After all Jimin is from Busan and Taehyung from Daegu, chances are, if BTS hadn’t happened, they might’ve never met, though looking at everything BTS have said about each other, they seem to believe they were all destined to meet regardless if as members of BTS or as normal people. The same most likely would’ve also have been the case for Jimin and Taehyung, and Friends is a beautiful piece of proof of that.
Many dismiss Friends as just a song about their friendship, but I think once you truly think about the lyrics and the thoughts that must’ve gone into it, you might change your mind. Even more so when you take into account what Namjoon said about Friends in his MOTS:7 vlive, how he wouldn’t even dare try writing any of the lyrics because he could never, ever do them justice, and how just thinking about the bond Taehyung and Jimin have, he gets goosebumps. That alone already says a lot, implies a lot of different things, very deep and (in my opinion) potentially more than just friends type things. There was also a moment during Bon Voyage 3 in Malta where Namjoon and Seokjin were at a restaurant together and somehow they brought up Taehyung and Jimin and both just shook their heads at how they are just--something, something apparently meaningful enough neither dared to voice it.
Friends might not be something you’d call a traditionally romantic or love song by any means, at least sound wise, but I’d argue the lyrics tell a completely different story, one of a bond that binds two souls, that combines friendship and love (both the love you have for a cherished friend, but also the one you feel for a romantic partner, I’d argue). The song, as well as 4 O’Clock are far more than meets the eye, you just have to be open and willing enough to see it.
After all Taehyung did say: “95z is love.” The biggest clue of them all.
From anon: I know it sounds like Delulu, so I write anonymously because I’m ashamed. The “blue & gray” lyrics sound like something Tae writes about Jimin to me. The words “my angel” (Jimin is an angel), “someone save me” (we saved each other many times), someone will call in the evening (after work in the evening we meet face to face) “I am blue and gray” (when I’m blue, Jimin’s smile is enough). To me it sounds a bit like lovesick ??? “I want to be happy” (Tae is happiest when he’s with me)
This is an interesting ask, and I don’t necessarily think it’s delulu of you to think this way, even if there are some who would claim otherwise. We know what Blue & Grey is about thanks to everything Tae, as well as some of the other members, said about it at the BE press con as well as Tae’s BE Weverse comeback interview, that it’s lyrics and music born out of Tae’s own feeling of burnout, of being blue and grey, and also is meant as this song to bring comfort to those who might currently be feeling the same way. It’s a song that feels authentic in its sincerity, especially because it was written with a raw honestly and introspective by someone who knows that feeling, as well as additional lyrics added to it to make it OT7 by others who have gone through/felt similar things as well.
We know Yoongi felt it, since we read his lyrics for his tracks on Agust D; we know Namjoon felt it, since that’s the feeling out of which mono. was born; we know Seokjin felt it, because that’s how Abyss came to be; and we know Hoseok felt it, because the members have mentioned how he used to be blue & grey before their debut since he’d been a trainee for so long and felt helpless/hopeless at times, like they would never debut; we also know that Jungkook felt it, since it was brought up in connection to the year that almost had them disband, Seokjin mentioning how Jungkook had retreated into himself, barely spoke about his feelings and thoughts, if at all, and they weren’t sure how to reach him; and I’m sure Jimin felt it as well.
So, since we know the backstory of Blue & Grey you might argue there isn’t really anything there to analyze, and in a way, I agree, but just because we know the main point/theme of the song, that doesn’t necessarily meant there can’t be more to it, especially when you consider how originally Blue & Grey was intended for Tae’s mixtape, and how the lyrics used to not only be different than the ones we have on the album, but they also used to be completely in English. In a way you could argue that while the basis of the song was always the same—a song about Tae’s feeling of being blue and grey—the underlying meaning/connections might’ve changed, or simply been modified to fit OT7 more instead of just him.
Before we get into it, one thing I’d like to say is that I’m in no way trying to twist this to say that the only reason for Tae to write songs is to make them about Jimin, I’m not that kind of person and I think his artistry has far more to it and holds so much deep meaning, but looking at the lyrics and things Tae has said about Jimin over the years, it isn’t that farfetched of a connection to make. It can just as well be complete nonsense, of course, but I see no harm in considering the possibility. I respect Tae and his music tremendously and I’d never want to belittle it in any kind of way, but it wouldn’t be the first time he’s written a song with Jimin in mind or referencing things that connect to him, so let’s just entertain the possibility, maybe even put our delulu hats on if that’ll make us feel a bit better, and treat this as something fun and not to be taken so extremely seriously or as facts, yes? Okay. Let’s go below the cut.
First let’s have a look at the original lyrics we first heard for Blue & Grey during In the SOOP, the version that was intended for Tae’s mixtape:
Where's my angel
I'm sick and tired of everything
Someone come and save myself
Cause I can't take it anymore
Everywhere I go, everywhere I see
Can you look at me cause I'm going free
Every time I cry, every time I smile
Can you look at me cause I'm blue and grey
I just wanna be happier
Baby don't let me go.
Even just based on that it’s easy to see how much they have changed between this and the BE OT7 version. For reference, this is how the album version starts, more specifically Tae’s opening verse:
Where is my angel
하루의 끝을 드리운
At the end of the day, casting its shadow
Someone come and save me, please
지친 하루의 한숨뿐
is only the sigh of the exhausting day
Like anon pointed out angel could be a reference to Jimin, or literal angels since we know that while Tae isn’t religious (as far as I’m aware) he does believe in angels and calls upon them to help him. But, as recently as his April 2020 vlive where he spoke about Friends, or rather the dumpling incident, he said that afterward when he and Jimin made up and Jimin told him he wants to support him and be his source of strength/energy Tae thought “my gosh, Jimin is such an angel like this. How could I have been in a fight with him?” (though I could swear the subs used to be a little different from this, that he said “how could I fight with an angel like Jiminie?” or something to that effect, (or that maybe our wonderful translators worded it differently during their live translations and I’m just getting confused), but that would mean for some reason at some point the vlive subs were changed thus raises the question why?). But even in previous years there were moments in which Tae called Jimin an angel.
In his letter to Jimin during BV2 in Hawaii, Tae spoke about how whenever he’s in the bathroom to cry, Jimin would cry with him (we also know that Jimin is the only one who truly knew why Tae cried when reading the letter, as well as that during BV3 the staff specifically called for Jimin when they noticed that Tae was crying), or laugh with him, is there for him. That could fit with “Every time I cry, every time I smile” and also make sense in connection with the next line “Can you look at me cause I'm blue and grey” since, in a moment where you feel blue and grey and yet find the strength to look for someone to help you, to reach out to, you’d want a person who’s very close to you to be the one to look at you/approach you, and he said it himself, in his Hawaii letter, how Jimin is his dearest friend, as well as during FESTA 2019, that Jimin is his one and only true best friend. So, what better person to seek solace with than him?
Furthermore, Tae also once said this (notice the mention of feeling blue):
Then the line “I just wanna be happier”, though I can’t really find a specific connection to Jimin in it, it does still fit with something Tae said last year after the release of Dynamite when they were guests on the radio. In it Tae mentioned how he is happy these days (he played the original version of Blue & Grey during ITS recorded some time end of May beginning of June 2020 while the MBC radio appearance was mid-September 2020, so 3-4 months later), how it took him a lot of time to achieve it since he always worried about things, but that he focused on finding happiness and it seems like he did manage to find it. When comparing Tae in the first half of 2020 to Tae in the second half, I think we can all agree that he seemed much, much happier in the second half, so his efforts paid off.
Also, if you remember, Jimin once (or more times) mentioned how Tae is happiest when he’s with Jimin (he could’ve just meant it in a teasing way, of course, but it could’ve also been just played off as such while being true anyway). So, if he’s happiest with Jimin, supposedly, it would make sense to look for him, mention him even if only through references people may or may not pick up on, and in a way it could also work with this line “Baby don't let me go.” because, once you found someone that can help you, that makes you happy and (among other things) keeps the blue and grey away, you’d want them to stay, right?
We don’t really have any details of what helped Tae finding that happiness, be it working on BE and getting to be the visual director, be it working on his mixtape and being able to put all these emotions he hasn’t shared before into his music and finding catharsis through that, or be it something in some shape or form connected to Jimin, all I can really do is speculate, and really, that isn’t really the point, is it? What matters is that he did find his happiness in the end, and found his way out of his blue and grey feeling.
So, we can say that at least the original version of the lyrics did potentially have some connections to Jimin, especially because I’m unwilling to think it’s all just a coincidence since with something as meaningful and personal as a song like this, there are no coincidences. Also, when comparing the ITS version and the BE version, the former seems to be directed at someone, a specific someone, like the latter more toward themselves, an introspective look (thanks to Admin 2 and romanticdrift for pointing that out). It’d be interesting to know how the rest of the song went, how the lyrics continued, and surely that would help a lot in seeing if there were more connections or not, but I guess we’ll simply never know. While the main point/theme of the song was and is, indeed, that blue and grey feeling and basically verbalizing it through lyrics, it isn’t too out there of an idea to think that Tae made those connection to Jimin deliberately as a way of perhaps pointing out a person or something that he looked for while he felt blue and grey, a person/things that helped him or he thought could do so. Though, again, that’s just speculations and theories, not facts, and I could totally be wrong.
One last thing I’d like to mention, and maybe I’m seeing a connection where there isn’t actually one and reading way too much into it, but I’ll share it anyway. In the BE version of Blue & Grey Jimin and Tae sing the following lines together:
괜찮다고 하지 마
Don’t say you’re okay
괜찮지 않으니까
because you aren’t
제발 혼자 두지 말아 줘 너무 아파
Please don’t leave yourself alone, it hurts so much
This, for me, is quite significant, even if doolset interpreted it as them talking to themselves and not someone else/each other, it still reminded me of the following lines from Jimin’s Promise:
아무렇지 않은데
“I’m alright”
그렇게 말하는데
Though I say so,
사실은 내가 그게 아닌가봐
maybe the truth is that I’m not
And I delulu and reading too much into it? I don’t know, but it was one of the first things I thought of when I read the translation of that particular moment in Blue & Grey.
Our song Prisoners was released a year ago today! It remains one of my favorite Dead Rituals singles.
It is a straightforward indie rock track, but my goal was to add some interesting textures and layers add some depth to the mix.
The song is about pressure from toxic people, and struggling to find a sense of belonging. It’s an open question that relates to one’s chosen path in life, looking back on every little thing that brought you here. What would happen if you could do it all over again?
The original concept for the song was to have it be an electronic-leaning track, much like the song Dark turned out later on.
However, I quickly realized “Prisoners” begged for a more energetic approach, so I made it a bit heavier with drums and guitars. My collaborator Paolo Cotrone developed some additional guitar parts and the heavier outro riff, which helped the song come together. My wife Brita also sang on the track’s choruses; I enjoy how her vocals contrast with the dense, raw guitar parts! Paolo and I also created an acoustic version, which gave the track a different flavor. The song also appears on our 2022 live EP, as we recorded a full band take during the sessions. Just a few seconds into the first pass at the song, the nut of my guitar, which I had cut improperly, exploded in scattered pieces everywhere! Thankfully, I had a backup guitar!
Find this song and more of our music on Spotify, Youtube, or Bandcamp.
gg releases of 2022 that make you (me) go 'so true bestie' part 1
songs that are utterly iconique, ahead of everyone elses, cultural resets and so on. gg only bc i can do what i want. with commentary bc i think i'm funny
LOVE DIVE - perhaps soty. perfect bop, concept, ICONNERY!!! like 'narcissistic my god i love it'??? genius
Feel my rhythm - Mozart sunbaenim would be proud, actually i have no idea who that classical sample is from lol. like i know it but- *gets struck down by the hand of god*
GingaMingaYo - Tsuki dragging billlie right out of nugudom with this one. name a better success story (except for brave girls rollin renaissance)
run2u - oh, her *sighs dreamily* if you dont get it i cant help you
Copycat - now. is anyone surprised? soty no 2. the concept, yoon bomi, the styling, the choreo, yoon bomi, that scene in the mv when chorong and bomi dance facing each other while looking identical, yoon bomi.
dm - fromis9 said it doesnt matter and they were so real for that
danger - I'M IN LOVE I'M IN DANGER. thx woo!ah! for another fun bop bc catch the stars while good was super boring (the fits at the end are still ugly as hell tho)
trouble?travel! - does anyone know this song?? anyway when adora sang 'hey dont go and pop it like champagne' that really spoke to me
pixys villain - "chew you up and spit you out i'm slowly killing you now dont make a sound" say more bestie. going into the bewitched hall of fame
a lot of recurring themes from The Despair Code are never going to really have their day...i'm a little sad about that but hopeful that if rnttnzr songs are ever played live, the lyrical content of some of these instrumentals will be fleshed out and used. who knows. i've even thought about fully rerecording Operation Northwoods songs, and they have such a long way to go it would be like a new song anyway.
but that's not what i wanted to talk about.
the version of the rnttnzr character (which is you or me and everyone else that wants to be) in The Despair Code is driven entirely by toxic and corrupt motivations. so much so that even happy sounding songs like Bicycle or GENIE are about nostalgic grief and failing someone you love, respectively, rather than childhood memories and running away together...and this self-fulfilling "bad luck" happens to rnttnzr because of perspective.
to fully understand why rnttnzr is so cursed throughout this album, i want to talk about IVY and the title track. the perspectives of these two songs give insight into the motivations of our tragic hero. in The Despair Code (the song), the scene is an ambulance arriving in the middle of a city on fire. at the nucleus of the disaster is the truly beloved of rnttnzr among the debris of an intense wreck. and the perspective rnttnzr takes is "i was too late to save them."
IVY is pretty similar, but like the play on words suggests (as IVY is both a character and a reference to needles), it's about an OD - an intimate, choking death without a city on fire in the backdrop. Just a silent hotel room. rnttnzr's first thought is "i should have stopped them."
how crazy do you have to be for the first word out of your mouth at the scene of someone's death...to be the word "i"?
not that I wouldn't try to save someone i loved. anyone would...but rnttnzr in this and many other ways makes their own self the center of the lives of their loved ones, and everything moves outward from there. you might say rnttnzr may only even have these relationships (if on a subconscious level) in order to play out personality complexes and trauma. so that when rnttnzr wishes to have been able to save a lost one, the motivation isn't "i wish my love didn't die;" it's "i wish i would've been the one to save my love." big big difference. this is without even getting into whether either of these "relationships" in IVY and TDC were actually two-sided.
rnttnzr is intentionally gender-neutral because it's a character for the listener to put themselves beside and learn with. you could almost watch yourself making the same mistakes. however, the complex i am ascribing to these songs is extremely rooted in my experience of male savior fantasies, which i had even as a seven year old. to be that crucial person to save someone from the brink of death, and be forever lauded and appreciated etc etc. and adored by them. i did this exclusively toward girls. for many years. jesus.
so even though it is not a gendered phenomenon in the context of the story (rnttnzr could be a girl arriving at the scene of another girl's death, for example), i name it as being inspired by the male fantasy savior complex family. rnttnzr is self-hating though and so feels no shame for this, only the version of suffering rnttnzr needs for this Despair Code side to keep feeding.
so yeah that is one of the crucial things rnttnzr has to unlearn in order to survive into album 3. using other people as strawmen for a hero complex is not anywhere close to friendship or love. it is a very blind and greedy way to see other people. it's no wonder you're too late to save everyone when you're never there unless you need them.
No tea no shade but the best version of White Queen (As It Began) is live at the Hammersmith Oden where Freddie introduces it with “Okay darlings, this is a little, a delicate little number called White Queen”
