#source: joke

[welcomehomeincorrectquotes]

Frank: *to Julie*Could you please go to Howdy's shop and get a carton of milk? If he has avocados, get six.

Julie: *coming back from the store with six cartons of milk* He had avocados!

[emmikay]

Tumblebrutus: Do you have any books on turtles?

Mistoffelees: Hardback?

Tumblebrutus: Yeah, with little heads.

[greece-epic-drama]

Echo hiding behind tree watching Hebe Hebe: Yesterday I met girl in the woods Echo: girl in woods.  girl in woods. Hebe: I can’t recall how she looked like Echo: how she looked like.  how she looked like. Hebe: maybe she was the most beautiful one Echo: she was the most beautiful one.  she was the most beautiful one. Hebe: or maybe the ugliest ever Echo: Echo: she was the most beautiful one  Hebe: *turning on her heel* GOT YA

[shit-the-vampyr-cast-never-said]

Geoffrey: Doctor, I keep hearing strange voices from my underpants.

Jonathan: Just ignore them, they're talking bollocks.

[shit-the-vampyr-cast-never-said]

Edgar: *escorts a crying woman to the hospital doors and starts coming back*

Tippets: Is she all right?

Edgar: I’ve just told her she’s pregnant. 

Tippets: Is she?

Edgar: Well, it got rid of her hiccups.

[incorrect-deltarune]

Susie: The best way not to cry while cutting onions is not create an emotional attachment.