#spaceboy rambles

[spaceboy812]

Just played Bad Things on Roblox (great game, go play it, one of the best psychological horrors I’ve ever played /gen) and I REALLY wanna talk about my take on the tumor

Short version: I don’t think it’s real!

Long version: I think it’s an excuse that Ivan made up in his own head to justify his abuse towards Andrew. “The tumor made me do it,” “I wouldn’t be treating him like this if it weren’t for the tumor,” “my brain is infected,” “it’s because of that tumor.” Are all things he tells himself to justify his abhorrent actions, his behavior. When he puts words in Andrew’s mouth and makes him feel bad for nothing, it wasn’t Ivan! It was the tumor! When he forces Andrew to sleep on the floor, and wakes him up in the middle of the night for no reason so he’s easier to manipulate? It can’t be Ivan! He wouldn’t do that! It’s the tumor’s fault.

The “tumor” doesn’t exist. That scene at the end of the game where it talks to him? I interpreted as his own subconscious making him face the fact that everything IS his fault. That the damage he did was so great he can’t hide behind a “tumor” anymore. Ivan isn’t the victim. Yes, he does need help. Yes, I think he could fix himself if given adequate therapy and enough time, but that doesn’t change the fact that he wasn’t the one getting hurt. Andrew was.

I think Ivan 100% knows that, which is why he imagined an excuse for his behavior. He has to be a victim in some way, otherwise he was abusing Andrew for no good reason. Even at the ending of the game, I feel his suicide was also him feigning victimhood in a way. I wanna stress that I’m NOT SAYING AT ALL that Ivan’s suicidal thoughts aren’t valid, they are and were, being Suicidal is possible for ANYONE, and always valid. Everyone deserves help, especially for things like that.

What I’m saying is that even in Ivan’s final moments, he made Andrew’s abuse about him. Like, it’s crazy to me that Ivan killed himself over the fact that HE abused Andrew. Ivan felt the need to attain victimhood to absolve himself of responsibility SO HARD that he ended his own life. And that’s fucking tragic man.

Man I hope my whole ramble there is anything coherent it’s like 6:40 AM and I’m really fuckin tired

Uhhh anyway #ivanhateclub /lh get that boy some help and get Andrew a permanent restraining order

[spaceboy812]

a good friend of mine just finished deltarune and his playthrough is really making me consider how perspectives can differ depending upon what's seen by each person.

He plays games very quickly, and tends to read dialogue very fast as well, which leads to him not processing shit all the way sometimes. He went straight to the goal, and paid little to no mind to side things.

This led to something very interesting!

My friend thinks that Kris is a villain, he doesn't like them very much. I find this fascinating and refuse to correct him until the game is finished, I wanna see how this plays out. Not much longer now. My mischaracterization

[spaceboy812]

Thinking about Bad Things again, specifically about how Ivan and Jimmy Mouthwashing share a similar space in my brain.

Obviously Jimmy is like way worse but they do have a similar mentality, it was the main thing I was thinking of while playing the game.

I think it’s really interesting to see how drastically worse the situation would be if someone like Ivan genuinely had no consequences for their actions. Like I genuinely feel that if Jimmy and Ivan swapped places neither game would be that much different- besides the rape, I don’t think Ivan would go THAT far. He’s awful but he’s a coward too.

Anyway yeah Ivan “Take Responsibility.” fanart when

[spaceboy812]

more mindhack stuff :P

as much as I love the pairing of newbie guard x unid, the idea of shipping ANY character who's been mindhacked with anyone feels a bit. wrong? In a way?

Because yes technically they are still capable of consent, but it's not really THEM y'know???? like. would the pre-mindhack Unid be willing to kiss that twink? I dunno! Honestly I don't think he would be

They're cute together but it feels a little bit uncanny, especially if you were to ship post-mindhack unid with post-mindhack newbie. Because that's two lobotomized people basically.

idk. it's late I need sleep uhhhhhh one more thing

As much as what the doctor is doing in the game is bad I really don't blame them at all because they were obviously (non-sexually) groomed by format. mfw I'm an evil ai and I have a position of power over a young child who's parents are in a bad financial situation :P

[spaceboy812]

Also heyyy. Maybe the reason I’m so sleepy is because I’m awake until the asscrack of dawn thinking about fictional characters… not sure though

[spaceboy812]

Outer Wilds is a truly unforgettable experience. I didn’t play it personally, because the controls were not to my liking, but I watched a friend play it.

I’m endlessly glad I did.

If you haven’t, play Outer Wilds. Why? Just trust me bro.

[spaceboy812]

cooking up something nefarious and mysterious rn

bubble bubble toil and trouble uh

fuck i can't think of a rhyme

[spaceboy812]

Man as soon as ATA 3 comes out I’m gonna be COOKED 🥀 the medical horror is my favorite aspect of the series so I really really hope they don’t fuck it up