#splatfest commentary

[splattales]

“It’s true!! She’s a plesiosaur! Marina, tell them about how Nessie is real!!”

“Oh. Yeah, um. Thousands of years ago, it was speculated that sightings of Nessie were not of a monster, but an ancient dinosaur living in Loch Ness. It’s still quite difficult to believe, but there was an entire souvenir industry around the legen—”

“It proves Nessie was the last dinosaur around during the human times!!” 

[askdjoctavio]

“Whoa whoa whoa! Is that actually a new Splatfest theme?!”

“Ok.... now I know that Chaos VS Order was overhyped...”

“I see the plan, if Off The Hook keep Splatfests going on forever then nothing bad will happen to them like what happened with me and Marie!”

“Who... who hurt you Callie?”

[sepiagogal]

“I’m starting to regret not using my hacks for this splatfest.”

[octowussabi]

“So glad I’ve been granted the opportunity to participate in this Splatfest. 

Now Mayo can win twice like the universe intended.” 

[kamabocolossus]

“Can someone please get these jellyfish away from me? I don’t like how close they’re getting to me...”

[hyperfreshisms]

“I feel silly now, am I always this overdramatic?

[askdjoctavio]

“Hold on a second, since this is a one off splatfest that makes this the true final fest...”

“....does that mean the plot of Splatoon 3 is gonna actually revolve around mayo or ketchup?

“....You know too much!”

“I swear to cod, if my wasabi get replaced with ketchup or mayo I’m leaving this franchise to become a mario character!!!”

[sepiagogal]

“As much as I’d like to have white ink for a day or two I’d rather stick to my natural colors.”

“Besides, the egg came first! I need to correct this wrong for the good of my sanity!!!”