A Spoonful of Peace at a Time
Dogs don't care that you're broken. Dogs don't care if you're a bad person who's done bad things.
They don't even care if you're not human.
The slobber all over your face is a testament to that, Chen sternly trying to get Spoon to behave and assuring you he's not as bad as a dog trainer as it might seem at first.
"He really should know better." Chen sighs. "Looks like I'm going to have to go back and reinforce his training."
"It's okay." you tell him. Because it is. Because that's been one of friendliest contacts with another living being you've had in a long, long time. You don't mind the doggy breath or the spit all over the place, because you know what it means.
Spoon...Spoon actually likes you. His emotions are so pure, so unrestrained - he doesn't hold back from loving people with all his heart, doesn't hold back from showing them his love. It makes you smile.
All Spoon cares about is what's happening here and now. It's an important thing you should keep in mind more often, sometimes you get so lost in the drama that is your life you forget to take a moment just to breathe. Relax.
Remember that you're a person now and you can allow yourself to relax.
It's hard to remember sometimes, what with all your lofty goals and secret life all crammed into that skull of yours. You know how easy it can be to lose touch. To lose sight of the little things. Sometimes you feel you're balancing over a precocious ravine, just daring yourself to fall (and keep on fall, fall, falling.)
Spoon nudges his snout into your hand and looks up at you with his big, guileless eyes. Absently you rub him behind the ears and watch as his eyes shut in pure pleasure. For Spoon, all he cares about right now is his moment. Living his life. Enjoying all the ear scratches he can get.
"You're a good boy." you tell him, because he is.
"Don't reward him for his bad behaviour." Chen makes a point of huffing - although that was definitely a smile twitching on his lips while he watches the two of you.
Spoon just wags his tail, banging it against Chen's prosthetic leg with a tinny Thump! Thump Thump! each time. Eyebrow raised, Chen finally gives in and pets Spoon too.
Huh. Even Chen isn't resistant to Spoon's puppy dog eyes, it seems.
The background chatter and noise of the dog park has become white noise. It's something to distract you from the darkness that creeps in when you're left alone to your own thoughts. You definitely don't want that, thinking too much is dangerous. Better to keep your mind occupied at all times so you don't have to deal with the reality of the situation.
Maybe your life is a mess. Maybe everything is going to fall down like dominoes around you.
Right now you're just enjoying the peace while it lasts.