Holland - I’m Not Afraid
On Holland’s new MV, South Korea being stuck in the heteronormative stone age and how that unnecessary sloppy kiss might actually change the world for the better.
In short: “I’m Not Afraid” is FAR MORE relevant than “Neverland”.
Please click to read on.
As some of you might know, I was rather critical of “Neverland”. I found it highly problematic that it was hyped not despite but simply because Holland is openly gay. Even though I like it, the song itself is pretty weak and so are Holland’s vocal abilities up to this day. The only reason it caught people’s attention was the comparably spectacular kissing scene, a real shocker if you will. Jump scare to a narrow-minded conservative (catholic?) South Korean elder. You don’t even see hetero couples getting it on like this on South Korean TV. But you know... in an ideal world, we’re past that point already, aren’t we? Queer people kissing in Western media is, fortunately, already canon. It’s 20gayteen. We made it. So I wasn’t exactly sure whether “Neverland” was doing us the big favor it advertised. In my opinion, it was exoticizing homosexuality even further. I wrote a lengthy paper for university that dealt with how toxic the whole “flower boy” culture actually is for SK’s LGBT+ community. The media is selling homosexuality as an entertainment product that, however, is still widely denied in real life. A gay Korean friend once told me: “I am from the countryside. Homosexuality simply doesn’t exist there. It’s not a rare thing, it’s not frowned upon, it simply doesn't exist.” The K-Pop industry is to a great extent based on selling “ships” to people, on toying with androgynous visual concepts... to cut myself short: it’s the gayest place on earth while at the same time (and as an uncanny side effect) hammering heteronormativity into young people’s brains. And boy, when I say heteronormativity I mean you are served the whole array of anti-feminist and patriarchal values. Exo’s “Lotto” is most likely one of the most disgusting and unbearable MV’s out there when you’re watching it as a somewhat emancipated woman. But that’s for another time... (I love Exo btw). So anyway... thanks to kissing games and all that oh so innocent stuff, homosexuality is fictionalized. Always toyed with, never actually acknowledged. In people’ s minds it’s a show element. It exists exclusively on stage. Good thing if a young gay guy comes along to change the world, you’d think. But I’d like to claim that Holland’s success actually just rode the very same wave that the idol industry has been riding for years, only in a somewhat more extreme form. It wasn’t a gay kiss casually happening because it’s okay these days... everything (including the teaser) was about that very kiss. Let’s be salty for a second... it was a really crappy song, paired with really crappy visuals and vocals that would have gotten 0 attention if it weren’t for the 2 boys making sweet out-of-context-love in that California king bed. Holland didn’t receive the love he received because it was suddenly okay to be gay and rejoice with the boys in South Korea. He received it because the video was downright (pleasantly, obviously) scandalous. And that’s the big ass problem we face here. It shows how unprepared South Korea is when it comes to being part of 20gayteen. Don’t get me started on the fetishization it necessarily attracted. Well, I still think it’s better to be fetishized than to be ostracized... or is that just me? When “Neverland” was released everybody was like “those are the winds of change” and I was like... uhm no. Actually, this just reestablished what has been going on for years: Being queer is possible on the silver screen, it’s South Korea’s favorite supply to spice trivial content up and we live in the times of “gay sells”... It’s a marketing strategy.
So based on that, you can imagine that I approached “I’m Not Afraid” with a certain mindset already. I didn’t have high hopes. When I saw gifs on Tumblr that informed me “Oh, it’s hot air revolving around a making out session again” I was tempted not to watch it at all. Angry even just by looking at the gifs. Obviously, I ended up watching it.
And the boy slayed.
“I’m Not Afraid” has indeed taken that step. Away from being gay for the entertainment factor to bringing forth a pro-diversity and pro-equality message. I bloomed (excuse me, Troye) at the lesbian couple, the tattooed guy, the trans lady, the beautiful palette of skin colors and (here it comes) maybe especially at the way Holland blew that shisha smoke at the camera. Ever since then I’m wondering whether SK has a law that requires cigarettes to be censored while tolerating the display of waterpipes... so many questions. Anyway... I’m talking about pride here. As a queer person, that video makes your chest swell with pride rather than (as “Neverland” did to me) cringe... It’s a sweet short film about a perfectly ordinary group of friends having a good time and there is nothing you homophobic, heteronormative piece of poo can do about it. Even though it is obviously completely staged (duh), it conveys a certain casualness that makes diversity look natural where it originally always used to be the forced center of attention. Pocky games and other kissing games are like cockfights (no pun intended) shoving the scandalous gay into people’s faces... and now look at Holland and his squad casually being themselves.
I mean, the whole MV can basically be considered that big homage to Troye Sivan’s “Youth” (insert that butterfly meme here with me pointing at “Not Afraid” and asking “Is this a “Youth”?) and I’d like to point out that Troye didn’t deem it necessary to zoom in (out?) on a sloppy French kiss but maybe that’s the point. Maybe it’s not that bad after all. While (at least in theory) Western media has seen one or two queer people and is pretty okay with them exchanging saliva, South Korea ain’t yet and maybe really needs to see some snaky tongues curling around each other before people get the point of how it is human nature to also be attracted to the same sex. Any sex really. Gender is so 1990.
You go, Holland. *stares at you as proudly as you stared at the camera after deepthroating that dude’s tongue*
I end this with a moment of tearful silence for the fact that I had to click “I agree” when YouTube warned me that “I’m Not Afraid” might contain content that’s not agreeable for everybody. But here I am: Not afraid.
