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In My Humble Opinion - Sebastian/Blaine - NC-17

Word Count: 9,068 Summary: How 4x07 should have happened. Author's Note: Unedited. I also tagged random four people (up to five tags show up) who expressed interest or I thought might be interest. I'll tag the others in a separate post.

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Sebastian can’t help but think that this is what it was like for Blaine two years ago, watching Kurt walk down that staircase. Blaine glances around at the students passing by him before looking down at the bottom of the staircase, where Sebastian stands.

“Sebastian. Of course it was you.”

The accusation, of course, stings, but Sebastian can’t blame him for thinking that. Last year’s plan to win over the New Directions hadn’t gone to plan. With a shake of his head, he allows himself to look Blaine up and down. That same confident boy he’d seen a year ago isn’t there anymore. Blaine looks like a cat dangling over a bathtub, squirming, uncomfortable, and maybe even frightened.

“No, it wasn’t. I swear,” Sebastian says after a breath. “I turned over a new leaf, remember?” Blaine seems skeptical as he continues to look around, as if he expects the trophy to just be sitting in the middle of the hallway or hidden behind a student. “No more bullying, blackmail, and assault this year,” he adds.

Blaine continues to move forward, without a glance to Sebastian. Sebastian can’t help but feel pathetic at the drop in his stomach. Of all people, he shouldn’t be worked up over this. He’d always said love was stupid until Blaine came into his life. Why should now be any different? Why had one goofy boy with hair gel turned his world upside down and changed him?

“That must be boring for you.” Blaine sounds bitter, and Sebastian steps forward, closer to him.

“Yeah, it is. Being nice sucks.” His voice is soft and teasing, and he laughs, though it dies in his throat. It seems to be the right thing to say because Blaine turns his head around, looking at Sebastian.

A small, tired smile plays on his face as he says, “Oh, really?” They pause in the hallway, and Blaine turns to him, slipping his hands in his pockets.

“I mean, it’s an absolute waste of good jokes. So many prime opportunities wasted because I actually have to make an effort to be a good guy.” Sebastian grins, and Blaine’s shoulders relax.

“How have you been, Sebastian?” Blaine asks. “I haven’t seen much of you.” As he nudges Sebastian’s shoulder, Sebastian almost laughs. When Sebastian stands straight, Blaine’s head comes up just halfway up to his chin.

“I wanted to spend as much time with Kurt before he left.” Blaine’s smile falters, and his shoulders curve back in as his posture drops. “Not that it mattered much.”

With the change of subject, Sebastian can’t help but feel awkward. He’d never been good at comforting anyone, let alone over a breakup. He’d been so used to causing breakups. As Blaine stands, shuffling his feet and staring down at them, looking like he’s about to start crying, Sebastian can’t just stand there and do nothing either.

“Blaine…” Moving forward, he wraps his arms around Blaine, squeezing. For a moment, Blaine stiffens, and it seems like he’s going to pull away. But then his arms wrap back around Sebastian as well, and his head falls against Sebastian’s chest. Though he doesn’t start crying, Sebastian can feel him tremble. It hurts when Blaine’s fingers dig into his side, but Sebastian grits his teeth, setting his head down on top of Blaine’s.

“Your head smells like raspberries,” Sebastian says after a moment. Blaine let out a choked laugh, lingering for a second longer before pulling back.

“It’s the gel.” Blaine sighs and shakes his head, starting to smile again.

“Your hair gets flatter and flatter each time I see you.”

“You’re one to talk. Looks like you’re trying it out yourself.” Blaine’s eyebrows arch as he looks up at Sebastian’s hair.

“Apparently, if I have long hair, I have to gel it back. Dalton rules. Trust me. I’m not the biggest fan of the look either. Though, I still pull it off pretty well, if I say so myself.” A smirk twitches up on Sebastian’s lips as he winks.

“Debatable,” Blaine teases.

Silence falls between them, and Sebastian knows that he can’t keep Hunter waiting for too long. There will be plenty of time to talk if Blaine transfers to Dalton. Sebastian’s stomach knots. That ‘if’ has been dangling above his head since they came up with the plan.

“He’s waiting for you in the library,” Sebastian says, slowing down as they come to a stop in front of the double-set of doors.

Blaine’s brow furrows as he asks, “Who is?”

“The guy you’re here to see. Captain of the Warblers.”

It had been so hard to give up that title, not that he had much of a choice. The Warblers had long since forgiven him both for the slushy incident and their loss at Regionals, but they had decided it was time to switch things around again. Besides, Hunter had transferred with the purpose of bringing the Warblesr to victory. Still, the Warblers missed Blaine. Even if he hadn’t been the captain, no one could replace him or the excitement he brought with him. It had been over a year since he’d left, and no one had stopped talking about him. It was for that reason that the idea to win him back came along.

The confusion on Blaine’s face is transparent. “I thought you were captain of the Warblers.”

“Things change,” Sebastian says with a shrug. He back and watches as Blaine disappears through the doors. For the first time in a while, hope swells up in his chest, but he’s afraid to latch onto it. What if the plan fails? What if he has to watch Blaine walk away from him again?

“Please, Blaine,” Sebastian murmurs to the closed doors and sighs. “Please.”

oOoOoOo

Even if Sebastian hadn’t been there when Blaine was a Warbler, the blazer fits him now. Even if he’s reluctant to sing, once he starts, Sebastian watches him fall into the song. He’s never seen the Warblers look this happy. All of their faces are filled with hope as they sing along in the background, falling into his step. They burst into life. It’s like watching the end of some cheesy children’s movie where two long-lost people are reunited.

Then, there’s Blaine. His voice explodes with passion and fear and longing. His voice swells along with the song, and he looks at home. There’s no other way for Sebastian to describe it. Sebastian can’t decide whether he’s falling apart or picking up all these lost pieces as his eyes close and he sings at the top of his lungs.

He really is, Sebastian thinks as he says it, flawless. He’s a Dalton boy through and through. Now, he just has to realize it.

oOoOoOo

Blaine’s agreed to get coffee with him at the Lima Bean after school. When he comes in, he has the blazer on. It looks a little silly with the sweater vest underneath, but it still makes Sebastian smile. He walks over to Blaine and grins.

“Like the blazer. Where did you get it?” he asks with a wink. Blaine flushes and fiddles with the buttons as if he’s going to take it off.

“I look ridiculous. I just – It felt nice to wear it.”

“No, no, it suits you.” Reaching up, he ruffles Blaine’s hair, laughing as Blaine pouts and tries to duck out. “Promise. So, how have you been?”

“I’m alright,” Blaine mumbles, though he can’t look Sebastian in his eyes. Instead, he glances down and to the left, as if, out of nowhere, the floor has caught his interest. “You?”

“I’m fine. Really, though how are you?”

Before Blaine can answer, though, they’re next in line. “I’ll have a medium gingerbread latte,” Blaine says, his voice small.

“Whipped cream?”

“Yes please.”

“That’s be –“ Before the barista can finish, though, Sebastian jumps in.

“And I’ll have a medium vanilla latte without the whipped cream. I’ll be paying for both of us.”

“Sebastian, you really don’t have to do this.” Blaine looks flustered, and he reaches into his pocket, pulling out his wallet. “I can pay for my own drink.”

“I know you can. But you won’t.” When he gives Blaine a stern look, raising his eyebrows, Blaine sighs and puts his wallet back inside his pocket.

“Fine. Just this once.”

They sit down next to the window, and Blaine squeezes the bridge of his nose. “You didn’t need to do that.”

“No, but I told you. I turned a new leaf.” He lifted his hands up and smiled.

“I keep on waiting for you to make some sort of sex joke.”

“Can’t promise that won’t happen. The bashful, schoolboy thing is still pretty hot.” As if on cue, Blaine glances down with a blush spreading across his cheeks.

“Sebastian.”

“Blaine.” Sebastian laughs and takes a sip of his drink. After a moment, he sighs, and the light mood slips away. “C’mon, now talk to me. You’re not okay.”

“You’re the first person to really notice,” Blaine mutters, and Sebastian can hear the uncharacteristic bitterness there.

“I’m sure other people have noticed.”

“Fine, maybe not notice, but care. Everyone expects me to bounce back. How am I supposed to just – He was the love of my life, and I messed it all up. I can’t count the number of times I’ve cried since we’ve broken up, and I’ve watched The Notebook twice in this past week alone.”

“You actually like The Notebook? Really, Blaine?” Blaine’s response is just a choked laugh, and Sebastian shakes his head. “It’s okay to not be okay sometimes,” he adds.

“I don’t want to be not okay. I don’t want to cry and try to talk to him and fail. It was so stupid. It was some guy over Facebook. Some stupid, stupid –” Blaine cuts off and his hands ball up into fists.

“People mess up.”

“Spare me the whole ‘everybody makes mistakes’ speech. It doesn’t make what I’ve done better. It doesn’t make me any less of a horrible person.”

“It doesn’t make what you did any better, but doing a bad thing doesn’t automatically make you a terrible person,” Sebastian says with a shrug. If one bad thing made Blaine a terrible person, what would that mean he was?

“I cheated on him.”

“Life happens.”

Blaine glances out of the window, his eyes watering. “Why are you being so understanding?”

“Because I’ve fucked up. Plenty more times that you have. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve helped someone cheat on their boyfriend. Even husbands. I’m trying to fix things too.” Even if he sounds matter-of-fact, it hurts Sebastian to admit it. “And, c’mon, look at me. I’m still pretty awesome.” Sebastian taps his foot against Blaine’s under the table.

“I see the ego hasn’t entirely disappeared,” Blaine says, and a small smile flickers on his face for a second.

“C’mon, grab your drink. We’re leaving this dump.”

“I really don’t have time –“

“We’re leaving, and you don’t have a say in it,” Sebastian says. “We’ll be home before midnight, Cinderella. Don’t worry.” Sebastian grabs Blaine by his hand and tugs him up. “Trust me.”

Blaine holds his gaze for a moment before nodding. “Okay.” He starts moving towards the exit with Sebastian before asking, “We’re not going to a bar, right?”

“No worries. I’m keeping it PG. Maybe PG-13 if there’s cursing involved. I know that’s absolutely scandalous.”

“Let’s go, then.”

Twenty minutes later, they’re inside Sebastian’s car and driving down some small country-style road. The roof of Sebastian’s car is down, and even though it’s on the colder side, it feels nice. Blaine’s hair looks silly, pushed back by the wind in one giant piece, kept together by his gel. Sebastian is sure that his own hair looks just as ridiculous.

Reaching down to the volume knob, he turns the volume up, One More Night by Maroon 5 blasting. It’s far too loud, and Blaine glances over at him. “Sebastian, you can’t play the music that loud.”

Sebastian just shrugs his shoulders. “You should try screaming.”

“What?” Blaine looks taken back.

“Screaming. It’ll help you feel better.”

“I heard you. This isn’t some indie movie, though. People live around here, and we’d be bothering them. I’m sure your music is already bothering them.” Blaine has to talk louder to be heard, but Sebastian still reaches down and turns the volume up more. It’s starting to hurt his ears, but he still feels victorious as he sees Blaine scowl out of the corner of his eyes.

“I can’t hear you,” Sebastian says, pointing to his stereo. “The radio’s too loud.”

“That’s because you’re turning the volume up,” Blaine shouts, poking Sebastian’s side. Sebastian just speeds up and turns the volume up even louder.

“You’re going to have to scream if you want me to hear you,” Sebastian yells, sticking out his tongue.

“Sebastian!” Blaine reaches out to turn the volume down, but Sebastian beats him to it, turning it all the way up. The car is shaking, and Sebastian wouldn’t be surprised to know that anyone within a mile radius can hear them.

“Still can’t hear you,” Sebastian yells again, though even his voice is lost in the music.

“Sebastian Smythe, you are an absolute asshole. Turn down –“ Before Blaine’s done with the speech, Sebastian’s turned the volume off, and Blaine’s just left screaming at the top of his lungs. “– that stupid radio before I have to –“

Blaine cuts off, his hands clasping over his mouth.

“God, no need to yell,” Sebastian teases, winking at Blaine. “Really, Blaine, think of the people.”

“I can’t believe you. Oh my God.” Blaine shrinks down into his seat as if he’s afraid someone will see him.

“Fell any better?” Sebastian asks.

Though Blaine crosses his arms over his chest, Sebastian is sure he spots the faintest smile on his lips before he pouts.

oOoOoOo

“Bresler Lake Reservoir?” Blaine asks as they pull in and drive down the road to the parking spots.

“My uncle sometimes fishes here when he comes to visit. Not that many people are going to be here now because it’s too cold.” Sure enough, there are only three other cars in the parking lot, and Sebastian’s sure at least one has to be from the guy who runs the fishing shop. As soon as he parks his car, Blaine hits him on the arm. “Ow!”

“You know what that was for,” Blaine says, prodding his shoulder.

“You’re so touchy.” The roof of Sebastian’s car clicks into place, and Sebastian gets out, locking it behind him and Blaine. His head turns up to the sky. It’s gray and the clouds seem low, moving fast. Still, it’s quiet, and he’s here with Blaine. Sebastian’s hands slip into his pockets as he smiles, still looking up.

“Sebastian?”

“Hmm?” His gaze falls down to Blaine.

“Why did you take me here?”

“Because anywhere I would have taken you in Lima or Westerville would have made you think of Kurt. Besides, fresh air will clear your head.” For a moment, Blaine just looks surprised. Then, a smile spreads across his face. “C’mon, Killer.”

They make their way out of the parking lot and towards the lake. They shiver as a gust of wind blows, but they still make their way over. He’s always loved this part of Lima, away from everyone else. The grass blends from wheat-colored to green on one side. On the other side, a small line of rocks line the path, sloping down towards the lake.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?”

“It doesn’t even look like Lima.” Blaine leans into Sebastian as the wind blows again, and Sebastian wraps his arm around him, rubbing up and down his arm. “But it is pretty.”

They’re not saying much, but somehow the silence doesn’t feel awkward or uneasy. It’s not like they don’t have anything to say. It’s been months since they’ve seen each other, and Sebastian is sure Blaine has dozens of questions about the Warblers and Hunter. He wants to know more about what Blaine’s been up to and how McKinley is, whether he has any friends there. It doesn’t seem like he has too many.

But it seems silly to talk. The wind rustles through the grass, and the waves of the lakes make a soothing sound as they hit the rocks. Blaine stays next to him, and he stares down at the small clouds of dust that come up at their feet with each step on the gravel.

It’s only about a mile in that Sebastian finally pulls away, moving towards the lake.

“What are you doing?” Blaine asks. He doesn’t follow Sebastian down the uneven rocks, instead waiting at the edge of the path as Sebastian bends down and sticks his hands into the water, cupping them. He grins and runs upwards quickly, dumping some of the water on top of Blaine’s head and running his fingers through Blaine’s hair, working the gel out of it.

“What are you doing?” Blaine squeaks, flailing his arms about as his head tilts forward. He shakes himself out like a wet dog and scowls before darting down himself, grabbing some water and splashing it on top of Sebastian’s head. Sebastian shivers and lets out a yelp himself, scrunching his eyes closed as water drips down his face.

When Sebastian opens his eyes again, frowning at Blaine, Blaine’s face cracks into a giant smile, and he starts laughing. “You look so silly.”

“Look who’s talking,” Sebastian says, flicking his fingers and getting off the remainder of the water onto Blaine. Blaine darts down again, grabbing some more water and splashing Sebastian before darting off.

“Bet you can’t catch me!” he shouts. Sebastian’s jaw clenches before he runs after Blaine. It isn’t easy to catch up to Blaine. Even if Blaine’s fast, Sebastian’s legs are longer. Still, it takes a good minute before Sebastian lunges forward and wraps his arms around Blaine. They fall forward, onto the grass and roll over a few times, losing momentum.

Their breathing is heavy, and they just lie there for a moment when they’ve stopped moving. Blaine’s sprawled on top of Sebastian, and his hair’s messy, some grass caught up in it. His eyes stay fixed on Sebastian’s face, and Sebastian’s breath catches in his throat. Blaine’s not pulling away from him. His eyes fall down to Blaine’s lips as he leans forward. His eyes close, and –

“I can’t.” Blaine’s off of him in a second, his face red. “I love Kurt. I know that’s stupid, Sebastian, but I can’t.”

Just like that, the moment’s gone. Sebastian feels silly and carried away. Of course Blaine hadn’t wanted to kiss him. Now more than ever, he wishes he could just go back and change what he did. What if he’s just ruined the little friendship he’s built up with Blaine.

“I shouldn’t have,” Sebastian says, his voice tight. He pulls himself up and brushes himself off, not looking over at Blaine. His heart pounds against his chest.

They make their way over to the car in silence, and Sebastian feels stupid as he pushes back tears. The quiet’s now tense, and Sebastian doesn’t know how to break it. Usually, he’d make some sort of joke, but his mouth feels dry, and that just feels wrong.

This time, Sebastian doesn’t pull down the roof of his car. He puts the music on low before buckling himself in. As he reaches to start the car, though, Blaine’s hand settles on top of his.

“Thank you for today. It meant a lot.” Blaine’s eyes meet his.

“No problem.” Sebastian’s voice even sounds hollow to himself.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t –“

“Don’t worry about it.” Sebastian’s voice is clipped. He pulls his hand away and starts the car before gripping the steering wheel.

“But you were right.”

“About what?” Sebastian asks, moving the car out of park.

“Dalton’s my home. Besides, it’ll be nice to have you around more.” Tilting over, Blaine nudges his shoulder against Sebastian’s before turning the volume to the radio up.

oOoOoOo

Sebastian had asked for a single room when he’d transferred to Dalton last year. It had been useful with all of his late night trips to not have a questioning roommate. And, on the off chance he snuck someone in, he didn’t have to worry about anyone interrupting them. Dalton had given him another single room this year, and things had been a little lonely.

However, with Blaine moving in at the middle of the year, the solution is obvious.

Blaine smiles as settles his things down. “It’s going to take some used to living away from home again,” he says, looking around at all the unpacked boxes.

“You’ll get used to it quickly.” Sebastian tucks the sheets underneath the mattress and shifts the pillow up. He looks at the made bed and smiles. “There. Good. At least you’ll have a place to sleep.”

Blaine grabs a box that says “BEDTIME STUFF” on the side before tearing at the tape. Sebastian watches, amused, for a minute as Blaine claws at it before grabbing scissors and leaning down.

“These might help.”

“Maybe.” When the box finally springs open, Blaine grins. He reaches in and pulls out a small white owl stuffed animal. “It’s Hedwig,” he explains to Sebastian’s questioning glance.

“Hedwig.”

“Yeah, like in Harry Potter.”

“I got the reference.” Shaking his head, he moves over, grabbing the lamp out of the open box and setting it in the bedside table. “I’d say I’m surprised, but, honestly, I’m not.” After plugging in the lamp, he looks up. Blaine’s looking at him with wide eyes.

“You don’t find this cute.” He pouts as he clutches the owl to him.

“I think you’re very cute,” Sebastian says. As Blaine’s face turns bright red, Sebastian laughs.

“I meant the owl.”

“The owl’s cute too.” Sebastian leans over, ruffling Blaine’s hair and grinning. “Welcome home, Blaine.”

oOoOoOo

Even with Blaine, Sebastian is sure that they aren’t going to win Sectionals. So, when their name is called out, Sebastian’s jaw goes slack. The Warblers are all jumping up and down and cheering. Hunter’s the one to grab it, and he wraps his arms possessively around it. The smirk towards New Directions is a bit much, even for Sebastian.

They look deflated, not that Sebastian can blame them. They lost their head divas last year, then they lost Blaine, and now they’ve lost Sectionals. Blaine’s hand tugging at his sleeve makes Sebastian look away from the New Directions. Blaine beams up at him before throwing his arms around Sebastian.

“We won!”

“That would seem to be the case,” Sebastian replies with a laugh, hugging him back.

“I just want to –“

“Have victory sex?” Sebastian asks with a smirk. Blaine flushes and purses his lips for a moment, but he’s too happy for the expression to last long. He shakes his head as he pulls out of the hug.

“You’re never going to stop with the sex jokes, are you?” he asks, squeaking as the Warblers move into a sort of group hug. Hunter looks thoroughly displeased as he’s squished in the middle with the trophy, and Sebastian chuckles.

“Why stop when I’m so talented?” he mumbles back, turning to face Blaine.

oOoOoOo

Thad gives the funniest speeches when he’s drunk. Sebastian’s leaned back against the sofa, sipping at a beer as he laughs. They’ve all gone back to Thad’s house on Friday night, since his parents aren’t home, to celebrate their victory.

“Goddamn, Blaine, we couldn’t have won without you. ‘Cause you’re like – you’re like our friend, and that’s just really cool.” He sniffles and raises his glass. “To Blaine Warbler,” he says. The Warblers all slur out their agreement and raise their glasses and cans as well.

“You guys…” Blaine gives them all a toothy smile before burying his head into Sebastian’s chest. Sebastian wraps an arm around him, running it up and down his back.

“Hey, it’s kind of true.”

After a moment, Blaine peeks up from under Sebastian’s arm and smiles. “Really?”

“Really.”

“You’re comfy. Like a human pillow” Sebastian laughs as he presses a kiss to the top of Blaine’s head.

“And you’re drunk.”

“Nu-uh.”

“Yes, yes you are.” Sebastian reaches out and runs his fingers through Blaine’s hair. Scooting closer, Blaine nudges up against his hand like a cat.

“Feels good,” he mumbles out, his eyes still shut. After a moment, he adds, “I want food. ‘M hungry. Can I have ice cream?”

“Ice cream?”

“I want ice cream.” He glances up at Sebastian with wide, puppy eyes, and Sebastian sighs.

“Thad, do you have any ice cream?” he calls out. Thad looks over at them and laughs.

“Yeah, probably. It’s upstairs in the fridge. Help yourself.” He goes back to his conversation with Flint, and the two of them burst out into laughter again. Sebastian nods and gets up, and Blaine whines at the loss of someone to lean against.

“Come back,” he whines, reaching up to Sebastian.

“Do you want the ice cream or not?”

“Can I come with you?” He reaches out to get help to get up, and Sebastian pulls him up.

The entire way up, Sebastian has to support or at least hold Blaine’s hand. He’s stumbling around and giggling, and he’s drunk. When they get to the top of the stairs and the door to the basement closes behind them, Blaine moves forward, pinning Sebastian to the wall.

“We’re alone,” he breathes against Sebastian’s lips, as if that needs saying. Sebastian’s eyes go wide, and he lets out a whimper as Blaine’s eyes fall down to his lips.

“Blaine –“ Before he can say anything else, Blaine’s lips are against his. At first they’re soft and tentative, but as Sebastian’s arms wrap around his waist, Blaine leans in. His tongue darts out, pressing against Sebastian’s lips and slipping past. Sebastian’s tongue wrestles with Blaine’s, and one hand slides up Blaine’s back and neck into his hair. He tugs, his heart racing as Blaine moans.

After a moment, Sebastian pulls back a bit, Blaine’s lower lip between his teeth. Blaine arches into Sebastian, his eyes closing. They fall back into kissing for another minute, and one of Blaine’s hands makes its way down to Sebastian’s ass. When they pull back, both of them are breathing.

Reaching down, Blaine tries to palm Sebastian over his jeans. Sebastian’s self-restraint is already wearing thin, so it’s lucky that Blaine’s drunk and presses down against his thigh instead. With a shaky sigh, Sebastian pulls himself out of Blaine’s grip.

“We can’t.” It feels like a weird sort of reverse déjà vu as Blaine turns red.

“Why not?”

“Because you’re going to regret this tomorrow, and I can’t deal with that.” It’s truer than Blaine knows. He’s already scared of losing Blaine, and he’s not sure what he would even do if Blaine pushed him away.

“No, I won’t.”

“If you can still say that tomorrow, then we’ll see tomorrow, okay?”

Blaine seems to consider the offer like it’s something important. His lower lip juts out as he thinks, and he nods. “Okay.”

oOoOoOo

As expected, Blaine doesn’t want to do anything the next day. Instead, he’s embarrassed, at first trying to avoid Sebastian. When he can’t take it anymore, Sebastian confronts him.

“It really wasn’t that big of a deal, Blaine. We kissed. That’s it.”

“But I wanted to do more,” Blaine says. “Maybe Kurt’s right not to trust me.”

“You were drunk.”

“But –“

“I need to study, Blaine.” Sebastian squeezes the bridge of his nose. He knows he shouldn’t be so short with Blaine, but he feels crushed. It’s stupid that he does. He’d known that Blaine would change his mind, and yet…

“I’m sorry,” Blaine whispers, wrapping his arms around Sebastian from the back. He massages Sebastian’s shoulders and leans his head on top of Sebastian’s. Sebastian looks up and moves his books off of his bed and onto the floor. Blaine curls up next to him.

“It’s fine. No, I’m just tired because I have an AP chem test and a killer headache.”

“Maybe you should take a nap.” They lay down on the bed, and Blaine’s rolls over on his side. They end up tucked up next to each other, Sebastian serving as the big spoon. His eyes close as he cuddles up against him. His fingers run down Blaine’s arm for a minute before resting across his waist. “Better?” Blaine asks.

“Much.”

“It’s just that with Kurt –“

“I know.” Each time Blaine brings up Kurt, it makes his chest ache. Blaine has never exactly been great at catching on to his feelings.

“I don’t want to hurt you, Sebastian. I mean, I guess you were excited about the sex. You don’t really go out and get it a lot.”

“It’s not like that.” Sebastian feels hurt that Blaine would even think that. He has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from saying something potentially offensive. Blaine doesn’t ask what way he means, and Sebastian takes a deep, calming breath.

They lie there in silence, their breathing deepening as they fall closer to sleep. Sebastian’s begun to drift off when he Blaine mumbles, half-awake, “You mean the world to me, Seb. I don’t want to lose you.”

You’re not about to, Sebastian thinks before falling asleep.

oOoOoOo

Things aren’t always so simple between them. Even if things are getting better about the Kurt breakup, Blaine still has moments where he’s inconsolable. There are moments when he breaks down. When Sebastian has to sit by his side and tell him not to blame himself. Once he starts, it’s a never-ending cycle.

That’s how they end up watching The Notebook one night to cheer Blaine up. Sebastian reaches into the bowl, pulling out some popcorn. He rolls his eyes as Blaine’s eyes stay plastered to the TV. “I can’t believe you like this crap,” he mumbles out.

“Shut up. It’s not crap. It’s sweet.” He lets out a small coo as he nuzzles against the pillows and reaches for the popcorn without looking. His hand misses the bowl at first, and Sebastian guides him to it.

“Next thing you’ll tell me that you’re into Twilight,” Sebastian grumbles, reaching over to the bedside table and grabbing his Coke.

“No.” He pauses for a moment before leaning against Sebastian and frowning. “I don’t want it to get sad.”

“We can always stop watching,” Sebastian suggests.

“No, no, I want to watch it. Crying helps.”

“I swear I can feel the estrogen in this room, and you’re a guy.” Sebastian wraps his arms around Blaine and continues playing with his hair.

“Noah and Allie were kind of meant to be, and if you can’t see that, it’s not my problem you’re blind,” Blaine huffs. He glances up at Sebastian for a moment, his brow furrowing, and Sebastian feels a momentary guilt.

“Okay, okay, it’s not absolutely terrible. It’s just not my taste. If you want to see a good, sad romance, I suggest Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.”

“I’ve never seen it.”

“We are so watching that next time.” Scooting up on the bed, Sebastian glances up at the TV and sighs. “How many times have you seen this movie?”

“Do I need to tell you?”

“Okay, how much can you quote it?”

“Probably about seventy percent,” Blaine replies, and, for once, he looks a bit embarrassed.

“That is actually rather terrible.” Flopping his head back on the pillow, Sebastian stares up at the ceiling. “How much longer is the movie going to last?”

“How much longer are you going to complain about it?” Blaine asks, prodding Sebastian in the side. Yelping, Sebastian pulls back and swats at Blaine.

“Do I really need to shut up?”

“Please?” Blaine doesn’t seem too teasing anymore, so Sebastian nods, feeling somewhat bad. After all, Blaine had been crying earlier; this is supposed to cheer him up.

Which brings Sebastian to the question, “How is this supposed to cheer you up?”

“I –“ Blaine seems at a loss of words, and, after a moment, he starts laughing. “I guess it’s not really going to do that, is it?”

“Let’s see, a Nicholas Sparks film where they both die at the end? Not exactly.”

“Well, I get to spend some time with you. That’s something, isn’t it?”

It’s as if some warm balloon is swelling inside of Sebastian’s chest. He can barely hide his smile as he taps Blaine on the nose. Blaine’s eyes seem to light up, and, just for a little while, Sebastian can ever forget that Blaine’s bad mood rose up because of Kurt. For right now, Blaine seems happy, and that’s what matters.

“You spend all your time with me anyway,” Sebastian replies instead, sticking out his tongue.

“Oh yeah.”

oOoOoOo

“Hey, Sebby.”

Sebastian looks up to see Jeff bounce down on one of the armrests of the armchair he’s sitting on. Moments later, Nick joins in on the other one.

“What’s up, guys?” Setting his pencil down on his book, he places them on his lap and looks between them.

“We just wanted to talk.” Nick has a weird-looking expression on his face, like he’s unsure if he should even say what he’s thinking. Sebastian’s not sure whether or not he wants to get into this conversation. Judging on their expressions, he might regret it.

“What?”

“It’s about Blaine,” Jeff says.

“What about him?”

“You’re kind of obvious.” Jeff bites his lower lip, waiting for Sebastian’s reaction. Sebastian can feel himself stiffen, and he glances down at his lap, shifting his homework.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Look, it’s okay to love someone,” Nick offers, wringing his hands. “I mean, Jeff and I – We weren’t a thing right away either.”

“Well, you were obvious from the start,” Sebastian says, picking up his homework and opening his book again. Before he can do much else, though, Jeff snatches it out of his hands and puts it to the side.

“No, you’re going to listen. Sebby, I know it’s not easy. I know you’re a stubborn asshole at time, but that’s what we love about you.”

“I don’t know whether that’s sweet or offensive.”

“I think it’s both.” Nick laughs before getting serious again. “Look, it’s kind of obvious for you too, though.”

“I’m not discussing this with you two. Besides, he’s still not over Kurt.”

“He likes you.” Nick nods.

“That much is obvious,” Jeff adds, nodding. “Besides, as amusing as it was to see you at first, it’s getting kind of sad, dude. You’re like a little puppy.”

The thought makes Sebastian’s cheeks flare. Has he really been that obvious? Then again, out of all of the Warblers, Nick and Jeff have always picked up on his emotions the best. Sebastian scowls, but before he can reply, Blaine comes in.

Jeff’s jab at his side is not too subtle, and Sebastian glares up at him before softening his expression and turning to Blaine.

“What’s up?” Blaine asks, falling into another armchair. “Am I missing girl talk?” Crossing his legs, he looks between Jeff, Nick, and Sebastian as if expecting an explanation.

“Nick and Jeff were just being silly. You know how they get,” Sebastian says, waving his hand as if to dismiss the matter.

“Maybe we should go,” Nick says, standing up.

“Homework to do,” Jeff adds. Out of the corner of his eyes, Sebastian can see Jeff looking down at him again, but he ignores it. They shuffle out of the room, and Blaine’s eyebrows scrunch together.

“That was weird. Did something happen?”

“Just the two of them being them usual selves. They’re probably horny. Bet you ten dollars they’re having sex right now.” The distraction works, and Blaine laughs, forgetting that he even found something odd the two of them a second ago.

“I wouldn’t even be surprised.”

oOoOoOo

Sebastian hates Christmas season. Everywhere he goes, he sees couples. Of course, cuddle weather is perfect for dating, and he can’t help but think about the empty bed he has to go home to. It’s almost become custom for Sebastian and Blaine to fall asleep in the same bed, wrapped up in each other. But now he’s home for the holidays, and he has to fall asleep all by himself. As he spots yet another couple holding hands, he grits his teeth thinking that this is what having baby fever must feel like.

“What do you think of this one?”

Sebastian looks up as Blaine holds up a blue bow tie with red polka dots. “Dalton colors, really?” As Blaine inspects it, Sebastian leans back against a wall. “Are you sure your dad wants a bow tie for Christmas anyway? Isn’t that more your thing?”

“I’m positive. He wears them too!” Blaine decides to put it back and moves on to one with a white and blue plaid design.

“If you say so.”

“Well, I do.”

Blaine settles on striped, green, black, and white one in the end. Perfume for Blaine’s mother is next on the list, but their stomachs growl, and they both need a lunch break. They make their way over to the cafeteria, and before too long, they’re sitting with teriyaki chicken in front of them.

“I love Asian food,” Blaine groans, slurping up a Lo Mien noodle. Sebastian lets out a noise of agreement, his chopsticks picking up another piece of meat. “Why aren’t you getting your parents anything again?”

“We’ve gone over this. I’ve already bought presents for my parents. I don’t wait until three days before Christmas.” Stretching his legs out, he pouts. “I’m already tired.”

“Well, we still have to figure out the perfume and something for my brother.” With the last bit, his face fell, and jabbed at the chicken as if it was somehow its fault. “I never know what to get him. Maybe I can get him a calendar with actor’s quotes on it. Do they make things like that?”

“I have no clue, but I’m starting to fear for my feet.”

“You’re such a drama queen, Seb,” Blaine said, rolling his eyes. “C’mon, it’s fun.”

“You know what else is fun?”

“What?”

“Getting salmonella.”

“Sebastian…” Blaine glances around before something catches his eye. “I know what will cheer you up.”

“Highly unlikely.”

“A cinnamon pretzel. On me.”

Sebastian can’t argue with that. As Blaine knows, next to chocolate-covered pretzels, they’re one of his favorite sweets. It’s been a while since he’s had one, and if he going to face another few hours of shopping for presents, he might as well find something to keep him happy for the first half hour.

“Okay fine.”

Blaine looks smug as they walk over to the pretzel stand and he buys two pretzels. The cinnamon sugar melts in Sebastian’s mouth, and he lets out a pornographic moan as he eats it. It’s satisfying to see Blaine squirm, but he doesn’t listen, continuing to make obscene sounds as he eats it. There’s something fun about making Blaine blush. In the end, though, the pretzel disappears, and he’s left licking the cinnamon sugar.

“It’s all gone,” he groans, tossing the bag back as he collects the crumbs. Blaine laughs at him and sniffs another perfume sample.

“This one smells nice.”

“O pretzel, pretzel! wherefore art thou pretzel?”

“Or maybe this one.”

Sebastian crumples the pretzel bag and throws it away. “I miss the pretzel.” Blaine looks up at him.

“You have sugar on your lip.”

When he sticks his tongue out and tries to lick it up, Sebastian doesn’t taste anything. His face scrunches up, and Blaine moves in closer. “Where is it?” Sebastian asks, bending down closer to Blaine. There’s a red tint to Blaine’s cheeks.

“It’s…” He trails off, and Sebastian’s brow furrows.

“Yes?”

And then, Blaine’s pressing their lips together. His tongue traces Sebastian’s lips, and Sebastian’s eyes go wide. Blaine Anderson is kissing him. Everything around him doesn’t matter anymore, and he feels ridiculous, like a little girl as he lets out an internal whoop. His arms wrap around Blaine’s hips, and he kisses him back. The kiss makes it hard for Sebastian to breathe, but he doesn’t care.

When they pull back, Blaine’s face is flushed. “Tastes like cinnamon,” he mutters, giving Sebastian a bashful grin. His tongue darts out, wetting his lips as he giggles. With a grin, Sebastian leans back down to kiss Blaine. However, they’re only kissing for a few seconds when someone beside them clears their throat. They glance over to see the Macy’s sale representative looking at them and shifting uncomfortably.

“Have you decided which perfume you want, sir?” she asks, looking between Sebastian and Blaine.

“I – umm – think I’ll need a minute longer,” Blaine replies, his hands slipping into his pockets and he rocks back and forth on his heels. “Sorry.”

“No problem. Take your time.” She clears her throat before scurrying off.

“God, that was embarrassing,” Blaine mutters, though his eyes fall back down to Sebastian’s lips.

Maybe the holidays aren’t so bad after all, Sebastian decides.

oOoOoOo

When they get back from winter break, it’s annoying facing the horde of Warblers telling them “I told you so” and “I saw this coming for ages”. Still, Blaine squeezes his hand and rolls his eyes. Only Hunter doesn’t really comment, just choosing to glance them over before shrugging.

“Okay,” is all he says, and that’s that.

Once they go Facebook Official two weeks later (“It’s stupid that that’s a big deal. Why does that make dating you more official than when we kissed?” Sebastian complains), they get an alarming amount of comments and likes. A handful of the Warblers just write: “About damn time!” or “Took you guys long enough.” Sebastian finds it silly and embarrassing; Blaine finds it cute.

Everything is fine until Blaine’s on Facebook, and a message from Kurt pops up.

“I thought you said nothing was going on between you and Sebastian.”

Sebastian’s stomach knots up, and he wants to tell Blaine to stay away from it. He knows that Kurt is just hurt, but he has no right to tell Blaine what he can do or who he can or can’t be with. They broke up over three months ago.

“I tried to make things right, Kurt. I beat myself up over it. I know that doesn’t excuse what I did, but I was falling apart. Sebastian was there for me. And there wasn’t anything between us until two months ago.”

“I see.”

Sebastian doesn’t fail to notice that Blaine adds, when he thinks that Sebastian isn’t looking, “I still love you. You were my first everything.”

It makes Sebastian feel sick to his stomach, and he feels terrible as he wishes for Kurt to just reject him. Maybe then, Blaine will forget.

There’s a long pause in which Blaine fidgets and switches between tabs before Kurt replies, “I care about you too, but you broke my trust.”

“Do you think we can ever be friends?”

“That sort of a thing takes time. I have to go. Rachel’s calling me.”

Sebastian falls back on his bed, turning away from Blaine as he closes his eyes. He wonders whether Blaine will ever forget about Kurt. After a minute, Blaine comes and curls up next to Sebastian. Sebastian wants to ignore him because that gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach is Blaine’s fault. Worse yet, Blaine knows that.

Instead, Blaine nudges against him, murmuring Sebastian’s name a few times. When Sebastian doesn’t respond, Blaine sighs and just leans his head against Sebastian’s side. “I love you. I still do love him, but he’s not a threat. I miss him. I want him in my life as a friend, but you’re not going to lose me.”

Sebastian feels like he’s going to cry, but he doesn’t say anything, staying stubborn as he clenches his jaw.

“Sebastian, please. He was my first love. I was with him for over a year, and our break-up wasn’t exactly easy. I want to resolve things with him, but I’m not going to toss you to the side. I want to be with you.” He presses a kiss to the back of Sebastian’s neck, and Sebastian caves, turning around with a sigh.

“You’d better not toss me to the side, asshole,” is all Sebastian says before wrapping an arm around Blaine’s waist and kissing him.

oOoOoOo

Blaine squeals as he points at the Blow Pops. “I used to have those all the time when I was little!” he says excitedly, grabbing two or three and putting them into the shopping cart.

“That’s a rather unfortunate name for a kid’s candy,” Sebastian comments, chuckling. “Blow Pops…”

“Oh, shut up.” Blaine hits Sebastian’s arm and rolls his eyes before continuing to scan the shelves. “Oh, God, and they have candy necklaces! I love these.”

“That’s what you’ve said about everything here.” Sebastian laughs. Everyone else in the shop is giving them curious looks. Every other person is either a mother or the mother’s child, and Blaine and him stick out.

“I’m going to get some sour sugar too. And gummy worms. And chocolate. Which chocolate should I get?” he asks, his head darting around as he prances over to the chocolate and goes wide-eyed. “There’s so much to choose from…”

“Well, you’re going to get diabetes if you don’t stop soon.” Sebastian shakes his head before giving Blaine a fond smile. As a present, he’s taken Blaine to a candy shop. As much as people sometimes tease Blaine for being a little kid, it’s as if he’s really regressed right now. More than that, he’s alternating between a little kid and a preteen girl.

He tugs at Sebastian’s sleeve and grins. “Look at this. They have a chocolate heart with a cream center that’s pink! That’s so cute.”

“You are terrible. I don’t know you,” Sebastian groans, turning away as Blaine puts it in the basket and continues to look around.

“Oh, shush. It’s fun. It’s candy! Besides, it is cute.”

In the end, he’s piled up a ridiculous amount of sweets. “I’m going to get a cavity just looking at it,” Sebastian says as he pays for it and they walk out of the candy shop. Blaine picks a giant, rainbow lollipop, opens it, and starts lapping at it.

Blaine leans over to give him a quick, sugary kiss, and Sebastian smiles. “Thank you, Seb.”

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Blaine.”

oOoOoOo

Sebastian whimpers as Blaine sucks at his hip bones.

“Is it bad that I like watching you squirm?” Blaine asks, his hands running up Sebastian’s chest and stopping at his nipples. His nails graze against them though his eyes remain fixed on Sebastian’s. Sebastian whimpers, arching off of the bed before responding.

“Why would that be a bad thing?” Biting his lip, he keeps from moaning again. Blaine’s relentless, and he focuses back on Sebastian’s hips, dragging his tongue along the inside of his hip and down to Sebastian’s thigh. One of Sebastian’s hands falls to the bed, and he squeezes the sheets. His eyes close, and his hips jerk upwards.

“Impatient,” Blaine teases, kissing down Sebastian’s navel. He pauses above Sebastian’s cock and kisses around it.

“Blaine, please…”

“God, I love hearing you beg too,” Blaine murmurs, still skirting around Sebastian’s cock. He traces his tongue lower before pulling back.

“Blaine.”

Blaine takes Sebastian whole, his lips tightening around Sebastian’s cock as he smirks. His tongue drags along the underside as he hallows his cheeks. He pulls back, moving to the tip and swirling his tongue around the tip before bobbing back down. His eyes flicker up, meeting Sebastian’s, and Sebastian flushes.

“Fuck,” he groans, arching his hips upward. Blaine chuckles around his cock and takes him deep again, loosening his throat before humming. The vibrations go straight down Sebastian’s cock, and he whimpers, his fingers wrapping around the sheets again. After a moment, he shifts his hand, moving it to Blaine’s hair. He runs his fingers through twice before settling in and tugging.

Blaine continues bobbing up and down, and Sebastian’s head falls back against the pillow. His stomach clenches, and he feel a low buildup in his stomach. His hips jerk up again, and his breathing deepens. Blaine’s pace just quickens, and, with a broken moan, Sebastian comes. His eyes flutter shut as his hips jerk up one last time.

Blaine slows down and pulls back, keeping only the tip in his mouth as he swallows the come. When he pulls back, a bit dribbles down his lips, and he laps it up, grinning. Sebastian stares up at him before tugging Blaine down on top of them and pressing their lips together. Blaine’s kissing is messy and needy, and Sebastian whimpers, feeling sensitive as Blaine accidentally rolls their hips together.

He pushes him back, reaching for the bedside table and grabbing lube and a condom. He sets the condom to the side before moving out of the way so that Blaine can lie down on the bed. He uncaps the bottle and squeezes some lube onto his fingers before carefully working them into Blaine. When he’s three fingers in, Blaine’s pushing back against him and whimpering.

Sebastian curls his fingers, his mouth going dry as Blaine moans and arches up again, his fingers now curling around the sheets. Sebastian pulls out after another minute, and he reaches for the condom, tearing open the package before slipping it on. He puts a little bit of lube on his cock before tossing it to the side.

Blaine flips over to face Sebastian, and Sebastian moves so that he’s hovering over Blaine. He positions himself , and Blaine’s legs hook upwards, over Sebastian’s shoulders. Blaine’s sweating already, and his hair sticks to his forehead.

“You ready?” he asks, and Blaine just jerks his head up and down, whining.

“Please. Please, Seb.” Sebastian slips in, watching as Blaine’s face screws up in concentration. He waits for Blaine to adjust before starting out slow. Blaine reaches up, his fingers wrapping around the first part of Sebastian he can find, Sebastian’s arm. He rocks against Sebastian, his eyes shut. Sebastian’s hand falls down to Blaine’s cock, and he tries to stroke it in time with his thrusts.

“Faster,” Blaine starts begging after a while, and Sebastian’s thrusts start to get erratic. Their breathing and the sound of skin against skin is the only thing that fills the room for a while before, out of nowhere, Blaine reaches down to grab Sebastian’s arm. “S – Stop.”

“Stop?”

“I want to…” He lets out a groan as Sebastian stills. “I want to ride you.”

“Oh.” For a moment, Sebastian stares at him before pulling out. He moves himself so he’s sitting up, supporting himself by the headboard of the bed, and Blaine wets his lips. They move, repositioning themselves before Blaine works himself down on Sebastian’s cock, taking it all the way. Sebastian’s head falls back against the wall, and Blaine grips Sebastian’s hips and starts moving up and down.

“Faster. Oh, God. Blaine, please,” Sebastian babbles out, his eyes closing as he thrusts upward.

“Fuck, I love being like this. Watching you moan and just beg.” When Blaine starts talking like this, Sebastian whimpers. Blaine’s usually the one falling apart. “I love fucking down on you and just watching you take it. Watching when you come.” It doesn’t take long before Blaine’s words slur together and just become a string of obscenities.

When Blaine comes, he dips his head back, his lips meeting Sebastian’s for a kiss. He squeezes around Sebastian, and Sebastian moans into the kiss, his tongue pushing back against Blaine’s. Blaine’s overworked and sensitive, but he still thrusts down a few more times until Sebastian comes as well inside of Blaine.

After a minute, Blaine gets off and falls down on the bed. Sebastian moves next to him, and they lean so that they’re facing each other. Their noses bump together, and Sebastian leans forward to press a peck to Blaine’s lips. They lie there for a few more moments, not saying anything. Blaine’s hand reaches up, and he runs it through Sebastian’s hair, tucking it behind his ear before smiling.

“I love you.” It’s the first time Sebastian’s said it aloud, and the words feel weird coming out of his mouth. He takes a shaky breath before repeating it, this time quieter. Blaine’s smile widens as his thumb traces down Sebastian’s jawline and then up to his lips. He hovers there for a second before pulling his hand away and nudging their noses back together.

“I already knew that.”

oOoOoOo

“Yeah, it is. Being nice sucks.” Sebastian’s voice is soft and teasing, and he laughs, though it dies in his throat. Blaine doesn’t look at him. In fact, he completely ignores him. He just keeps on walking, looking annoyed. He continues glancing around, looking for the trophy. With each step, he’s more distant, and Sebastian can feel his stomach dropping.

They continue walking, Sebastian feeling his eyes prickle. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that this plan isn’t going to work. Blaine’s long gone.

“He’s waiting for you in the library,” Sebastian says, slowing down as they come to a stop in front of the double-set of doors.

Blaine’s brow furrows as he asks, “Who is?”

“The guy you’re here to see. Captain of the Warblers.” Sebastian slips his hands into his pockets as he shrugs. He can still try, but the hope he’s had flickers out. A song and a blazer isn’t going to win him over. Blaine doesn’t belong here anymore. Even if he did, he wouldn’t ever recognize or admit it.

“I thought you were Captain of the Warblers…” Blaine looks confused and sighs. For a moment, he seems to be waiting for Sebastian to say something else. When Sebastian says nothing, he walks away.

Sebastian watches at the doors close behind him, and he drops his head. The fantasy he’s spent the past two weeks playing over and over in his head fades away, and he stares down at the ground. “We could have had it real great, Blaine,” he says to empty air. “We really could have been something.”

#spuffina

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