seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Norway
seen from Singapore
seen from Malaysia
seen from Canada
seen from Singapore
seen from Australia
seen from Slovakia
seen from United States
seen from Ecuador
seen from Russia
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Poland
seen from United States
seen from United States
Religious people frequently psychologise same-sex attraction to explain it away. It was suggested to me a number of times that my intense crushes on girls were a distorted expression of my desire for friendship and familial intimacy.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
I missed believing death wasn't the end.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
The freedom to speak the truth about who you are is deeply liberating and healthful, as Bessel Van Der Kolk attests in his work on suppression and trauma:
As long as you keep secrets and suppress information, you are fundamentally at war with yourself. Hiding your core feelings takes an enormous amount of energy, it saps your motivation to pursue worthwhile goals . . . Meanwhile, stress hormones keep flooding your body . . . Ignoring your inner reality also eats away at your sense of self, identity and purpose.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
As soon as I feel seen, I begin to panic about how I'll cope when they inevitably pull away.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
Today, Australian women are allowed to remain in their government jobs after they marry (since 1966), people can leave a marriage freely (since 1975) and homosexuality is no longer a crime (since 1984 in NSW). Perhaps one day, situations like mine will be just another historical curiosity, a simple case of good old-fashioned discrimination.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
Of the widespread normalisation of 'traditional' marriage that had occurred by the 1950s, Coontz writes:
Never before had so many people agreed that only one kind of family was normal. The cultural consensus that everyone should marry and form a male-breadwinner family was like a steamroller that crushed every alternative view. By the end of the 1950s, even people who had grown up in completely different family systems had come to believe that universal marriage at a young age to a male-breadwinner family was the traditional and permanent form of marriage.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
The way to remain unbroken, we were told, was to abstain.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
Trusting God's benevolence and the authority of the Bible gives Rachel the strength to say no to temptation to indulge her lesbian desires. Instead of sex with women, Rachel now turns to God for fulfilment. The implication is that our desire for sexual intimacy is an echo of a deeper, spiritual longing for intimacy with God.
"In/Out: A Scandalous Story of Falling Into Love and Out of the Church" - Steph Lentz
