#stopwiping

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ARNOLD NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ASSWIPING IS MURDER!

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The amazing Kat Theaz talks about her journey as a nonwiper and why she will never wipe again

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oh please i haven’t wiped my ass since 1969 and i was born in 1994

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Ezio in Space

Ezio was sitting on top of his kitchen sink taking a massive shit because all the bathrooms in his house were being used and he had 200 spicy laxatives which is something he recently invented but it turns out he took way too many laxatives because his ass caused a massive explosion causing the entire kitchen to catch fire but Ezio had another problem, he couldn’t stop shitting.

Ezio tried so hard to stop shitting but it just caused him to shit even more violently he decided to go outside to avoid causing further damage to his house he ended up flying into the sky, “here we go again” Ezio said while being shot up into the air. Ezio started flying faster than a rocket, eventually ending up in outer space and landing on the moon.

“oh boy what a predicament this is” Ezio exclaimed while walking around the moon, “how am i gonna get home this time?” he asked himself in fear. Ezio proceeded to put his hand in his pocket and realized he had some spicy laxatives with him and proceeded to eat them all and then he started shitting again and started flying back to earth to find that his house has burned down because of the fire that shot out of his ass. “well i learned my lesson, do not eat too much spicy laxatives because my house will burn down and i will end up in outer space”. Ezio walked away from the charred remains of what used to his house and disappeared into the sunset only to return when its time for his next adventure.

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Ezios journey

Ezio was drinking his favourite high fibre smoothie which consisted of beans, lentils, chia seeds, avocados, bananas, apples and coffee mixed together and then blended together to make what he likes to call “rocket fuel” because when he drinks it he farts fire which sometimes shoots him up in the sky. well one day he decided it would be fun to add 37 packs of laxatives to the rocket fuel and not only did it cause him to fly faster, it also caused him to leave a very foul stench, it was so foul that even Milk the fart sniffer fainted the second she smelled it.

Ezio was enjoying flying around the world but he began to realize that he was unable to stop and has tried crashing into things however that only made fly faster. after shitting out fire for 69 hours he started to slow down but sadly he was he was flying over the atlantic ocean when he started to slow down but luckily when he stopped flying he fell into a pirate ship but lucky for him he let out a massive smelly fart that caused all the pirates to pass out so he pushed them off the ship while they were passed out and used the ship to sail back home but then he got hungry and all the food pirates had were filled with fibre and he decided that he had enough fibre for one day and quickly sailed back home to everyone running away from him because he smells really bad.

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Milk the Fart Sniffer

once upon a time there was a girl named milk. on the outside she looked like the average girl but what made her different than the other girls is that she sniffed other peoples farts. she loved sniffing farts not because it’s fun but because everytime she sniffs a fart she gets special powers that include being able to control peoples minds. she loved it because it meant that she can rule the world but sadly there was a huge setback. her powers only lasted as long as the farts she sniffed to get them to work in the first place. she was saddened by this setback but determined to find the perfect specimen of a human who can fart for so long it can make her invincible. one day while she was going for a walk she discovered an old map to a secret island where over 50% of the oxygen of the island is made of farts, that island was Stop Wiping Island home of some of the most petrifying farters to ever walk the earth. so she traveled there and discovered one of the most Notorious farters was hospitalized after a car crash and his name was Mark Skidz. so she broke into the hospital, disguised herself as a nurse and gave mark skidz a lethal dose of laxatives and made him the most gassiest most shit-tastic farter to ever exist however her plan got foiled when she discovered her powers have a weakness and that weakness is karen farts and karen had a fart that lasted about a minute and it caused her plan to foil before it could even begin. she is now in jail for trying to take over Stop Wiping Island.