queliot post s5 infidelity..... š
I've talked about this one a bit before but basically it's Quentin returns from the dead 10 years post the end of the season, Eliot is married to some nice rando who's actually good for him, but he and Q have a messy affair that ends Eliot's marriage.
Here's a snippet, I haven't written a ton of this but my goodness I really want to. The vibes of it are so specifically tough and kind of mean and messy and Not Pretty in this way I worry I am incapable of pulling off, but I want to give it a try.
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In the end, he has to excuse himself to the bathroom to throw up before he can hear the full story. Itās funny, all the times he used to imagine seeing Quentin again, some miracle giving him a second chance, and heād never imagine nausea being the overriding physical sensation accompanying what should be the happiest moment of his life, but itās there, roiling through his gut, his head pounding and eyes stinging, entire body recoiling from sensory overload as he hears Juliaās excited, loud voice telling the story. He keeps flinching every time Quentinās voice cuts through to embellish the details. Heād forgotten the sound of his voice. Forgotten that heād forgotten it, forgotten to think about the way his mouth moves. Fuck.
āEl, are you okay?ā Quentin asks at one point, and Eliot makes an involuntary whine in the back of his throat. Quentinās voice, saying his name. Quentinās voice. Quentin. Q. Quentin. Heās going to be sick again.
Thereās a hand on his back and he leans into Benās touch automatically. Heās anchoring himself with Benās presence but at the same time itās like Ben isnāt really there. And Julia isnāt really there. Eliot himself isnāt really there, itās only Q, Quentin is the only thing that exists. Which means this must be death, this place, this feeling, it must be death. Because Q is dead. That much he knows. That much heās been forced to know every day for the last ten years. He has carried it as a talisman, it is a fact that grounds him to the earth.
