there used to be a time when i felt guilty for not studying enough, procrastinating all day or skipping lessons. but that guilt was almost playful...lighthearted. that guilt was often found in memes, or conversations with friends, or a good humored joke thrown at us by our favorite teacher...and we ultimately brushed it off and continued to repeat the vicious cycle.
now...everytime i find myself procrastinating, not studying enough, skipping lessons...i'm reminded of all the children in Palestine, the ones who couldn't make it till preschool, the ones who had their books burnt, buried under the rubble, the ones who dream of becoming this and that after the war ends, and the ones who only dreamt, and now they are not around to make them come true. i think about all the schools, libraries, colleges bombed, all the history lost in the archives now in ruins...and this time the guilt is no longer found in memes, or in conversations with friends, or in jokes by teachers. this guilt is different. it's real.