6 Habits of Positive People
Your biggest cheerleader, and your toughest critic, can often times be found in your own head. It is self talk guiding you through life, providing a running commentary. It is perfectly normally to have the positive voice encourage you to achieve more or to make the next move. On the other hand, the negative voice can step in at times and start telling you why you are wrong, and that you are going done the incorrect path. Completely normally to hear both sides but maybe not always at the same time!
It may be completely normal to have negative self talk, but that doesn’t mean that you have to listen to it. Just like if a person was saying negative things to you - you don’t have to listen to it!
Successful people have figured out that secret and learned that they can change the track in their head. So how do you do tha,t and what do does your new inner monologue sound like?
6 Hallmarks of Successful People’s Self Talk:
1. They Don’t Beat Themselves Up:
Successful people acknowledge their mistakes or shortcomings on a project and then move on. They don’t get caught up in shaming themselves, name calling or berating because it does no good. Instead recognize what you didn’t like about the situation, decide what you learned from it, determine how you are going to handle it differently in the future and then move on.
2. They Ditch “Hand-Me-Down” Talk:
Things we hear as children stick with us (side note: know that we are adults we should remember that we talking to children) and sometimes a well meaning adult will say something not knowing the effect it will on us or not knowing our personality. Now years later that comment comes back to us has a haunting message of doubt. Lose it! Trace back the origin of those messages that keep you down and try to work through why it stops you.
3. They View Setbacks as Stepping Stones:
Setbacks and challenges are a way of life. Often times the best opportunities come out of how you handle challenges. Successful people know that you can view a setback as a roadblock but as hazards that are short detours.
4. They Don’t Let Negative Thoughts Snowball:
We have all been in that situation were we let our negative thoughts overwhelm us or “snowball” and we can’t move forward. No action comes from that place and you want to avoid that mindset when all possible. The best thing to do is to not let those thoughts snowball there but how? When one or two things start going wrong don’t let your mind go to the negative - you will find it.
Instead separate each challenge out, don’t look for a negative pattern and create a plan of attack for each challenge. Concentrate on what is in front of you not on what could go wrong.
5. They Don’t Personalize the Situation:
Just because something doesn’t goes your way, it is not a reflection on your abilities as business person, your skill set, knowledge or how hard you worked. Also there were other factors that contributed to the outcome so don’t take it personally.
6. They Forgive Themselves:
Even if you did make a mistake that contributed to the outcome, or if you just feel it wasn’t your best performance, you need to forgive yourself. Learn from the situation, acknowledge that you have learned from the situation and move on.
For more information on how successful people turn the negative self-talk in their heads around read the article by Gwen Morgan in Fast Company.