King Squishy
Disclaimer/Triggers: Fic is in no way representative of Yoongi's personality or thoughts in real life. Crude language.
Note: Completed part 1 guys. Hope you like it!!! Not edited as usual (btw, when I say not edited- I mean I haven't edited it perfectly. I still edit to some degree as I write, but due to wanting to churn out the volume of fics I want to get out there, with my time constraints --I tend to not officially sit down and edit every piece extensively ). I plan to have one more part to finish the story.
[PART 1]
She stared at the screen, squinting her eyes, completely tired from the strain of focusing on the screen in front of her. King Squishy, his ugly blob Majesty, trudged over to her. She had been recruited by the planet, Xalaxia, to manage their secretarial works requiring communications with earth. Since she knew the Xalaxian dialect and English with fluency, she had been the perfect gal for the job.
Y/N wouldn't have minded working on the lush green planet with pink golden sunsets, if not for her treacherously annoying and strict boss. The king of the planet himself. King Yoongi. Or as she liked to refer to him as, the bane of her existence. He would always harp on her to finish the work quickly even when she was ahead of schedule. And he would unscrupulously watch over her every move ,as though she were committing a crime by working diligently on behalf of his stale, rank pumpernickel ass.
He wasn't fluent in English, so he relied on her a lot for even diplomatic efforts of his planet. Here he came, entering the room with an infuriated face, waddling his squishy amber, amorphous ass resembling jelly like a duck. All the people on this planet had two forms, one that resembled something more similar to humans--average heights reaching up to 6 feet and up. The other form most of them carried was that of a a normal human face on top of what could not be described in any other words other than a goopy blob that would shapeshift to form humongous tentacles. The black appendages would sometimes drip inky obsidian fluids as they walked, leaving what Y/N called , a "xalaxian trail".
Y/N tiredly drawled out as she typed a document without moving her eyes off the screen, "What service would you like to procure from me today your Majesty"?
Yoongi snarled as he threw a bunch of papers onto her desk, "Is this what you call a complete financial report of the trade embargo we have between Earth? It has a bunch of typos, even I would be able to tell!!!! Why are you so incompetent, you lazy woman"?
I bristled, alive with fury as I attempted to calm down, staring at the document he threw at me. I felt like laughing when I figured out what his problem was. "Ummm, Sir, you do know that these type of letters require more official language ,right? The spellings are all correct. Whatever you have marked in red ink is just the past tense of regular English verbs. We don't say ever say the word "thinked", we say "thought", to express past tense".
His entire face blanched as he started sputtering in a fury, "F-f-fix it then, you human imbecile"!
And he immediately scurried away, his prominent trail viscously dripping after him. I had to not choke on my own laughter, as I stared at a human blob try to run away from me. His magestically goopy form, was trying to get away, but the massive size of his tush was not letting him, making him look like he was twerking and wiggling his butt as he tried to abscond.
Xalaxians did not wear robes or any clothing for that matter in their blob-like forms, they only wore them when they were humanoid in shape.
Y/N sighed, the days on Xalaxia were becoming monotonous, as she felt encumbered with all the excess transmissions to be translated. She was leaving late nowadays from her work station, dropping down on her bed exhausted, instantaneously falling asleep. It had been exciting in the beginning, with all the cuisines, colorful people, and beautiful outdoor environment. But with the way she had been transferred from working with the kind council member Taehyung to becoming the king's secretary, it had been a less than pleasant transition, putting it very lightly.
She pondered with her hands holding up her chin, maybe she should apply for the yearly mating banquet. Humans were allowed to participate. It was quite simply put, a banquet where people found mates (permanent mates, not casual ones). Y/N had not participated in the last two years she had been on Xalaxia. But even she was feeling a bit lonely from time to time. Maybe a mate would help curb that. She wasn't getting any younger.
Xalaxians mated for life, and since their life span of 1000 years instantaneously conferred upon their partner once a mating bond was formed, it was a very big deal who your partner was. Y/N dreamily imagined finding a kind Xalaxian who would treat her right and give her children, something she had always wanted. They would live in a gorgeous garden estate and relax, sharing a marriage bed. She felt like blushing at the mere thought.
She typed up and submitted the application form on her bed. A tinkling sound came from her lap top indicating that the form had been submitted. Before Y/N could even process the happiness and possibility that would come of starting the search for a mate, she got a phone call.
As she picked up the call from an unknown number, she heard a screeching voice, "HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME??? HOW COULD YOU SUBMIT A MATE FORM WITHOUT MY PERMISSION, WHEN YOU ARE MY SECRETARY? I FORBID YOU Y/N, I FORBID YOU FROM LOOKING FOR A MATE"!
Y/N's indignance peaked, who the hell did this king think he was? Forbidding her from finding a mate, something that was mandated by law as a privilege allowed to every resident of Xalaxia. Y/n calmly replied, "And I fail to see how that is my problem, you rank ass goop ball. Don't test me, sire. If you infringe upon my rights, I shall merely quit the job. What exactly is your problem anyway"?
He yodeled back, exasperated, "YOU. YOU. It's always fucking YOU". Y/N felt so irritated and frustrated at his vague proclamations. "And what do you even mean by that, Sire"?
He sobbed , clearly inebriated from drinking, as he would never show such expressions of emotion otherwise. "You wouldn't work for me anymore, if you found a mate".
Y/N sniped back, rather confused at his intent, "And how is that supposed to be my concern"?
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Y/N didn't understand his bloody problem. Always scolding her for no goddamn reason. His rotund, lardaceous, jiggly ass needed a reality check and quick.
The Royal Banquet Hall of Xalaxia was teeming with otherworldly flora in myriad shapes and sizes-bulbous fluorescent fuchsia tendrils winding across the delicate crystalline roof of the massive glass greenhouse where the banquet was taking place. The hall pulsed with an iridescent lacquer which changed hue every few minutes.
Floating orbs containing singular candles were suspended in clusters in the air casting flickering shadows of lavender and gold. At the far end of the massive hall, seated amidst a sea of other ministers was King young --shrouded in a fine fabric shimmering purple and gold, in his humanoid form for once. It was so he could negotiate with all the alien dignitaries who had come from various foreign planets. So they wouldn't be confused or intimidated by his voluptuous cakes. A clear hazard that came with the job.
He sat on his ever glowing fungal, slimy throne with a rigidity-- reminiscent of a street lamp. His posture screamed : I am pretending to not lose my shit at any given moment. Something Y/N was well accustomed to seeing.
And see she did.
She swept through the entrance of the hall, dressed in a frothy, whimsical pink fabric that shimmered- mimicking the luster of a nebula. The dress was woven with Xalaxian silk, infusing the dress with a mauve gradient at the hem of the gown--printed with gold inscriptions traditional to the tribal regions of the planet. Her attire hugged her perfectly, allowing her to glide into the room --leaving a deluge of scintillating particles in her wake.
Her lips were painted a brilliant berry color - mimicking drippleberries (plants native to the planet) and her hair was braided with the violet xalaa flowers that bloomed once in a year, on the night of the full moon on Xalaxia. They were rare flowers that bloomed and died , depending on the life form they came in contact with. The fact that they trusted Y/N enough to adorn her hair, sent out a clear message.
All in all, she was stunning and the current center of attention as other foreign dignitaries flocked towards her to get a glimpse. Her generous bosom spilled into the deep neck of the gown showed off her shimmering skin. She looked as though she had bathed herself in drippleberry juice--a concoction known for hydration which made the skin visibly glisten with a dewy confidence.
She was being swarmed , alien males with too many appendages , men with spiked tails trailing behind them. Males even goopier and uglier than Yoongi as well. A fog of pheromones flooding the atmosphere as countless people tried to catch her attention, make conversation with her, and even dare to lure her close enough---just enough to get a taste perhaps.
All things that enraged Young as he tried to maintain a smidgeon of his regal composure.
She walked into the hall like she owned it, like a rare precious treasure that was ready to be stolen by hungry eyes and hands. Hands that King Yoongi wouldn't let even remain in the same vicinity. He glared indignantly at all the happenings.
"Are you ok , your Highness"? A council member hesitantly uttered.
"I'm fine Phillips", Yoongi muttered. "Just internally combusting, nothing new".
As belligerent as he was , at all these aliens staring at his Y/N, he couldn't stop staring at her beauty .Her grace, her. He couldn't look away. He couldn't even think of anything other than her.
His inner conscience was rattling at him.
Her tits are glistening. Why are they so shiny? Control yourself, Yoongi. This is a political diplomatic event. You are a monarch, a leader, respected ....atleast till yesterday you were.
He slapped himself on the cheeks.
Get it together.
She turned, smiling at someone. And Yoongi almost growled in exasperation.
Nope. He thought he could handle it and he couldn't. I'm going to start an intergalactic war with the way this is going. She's mine. And I'm damn well keeping her. Someone control me before I convert to my blob form. I'M ABOUT TO SLITHER.
He was frothing at the mouth, about to snatch up and stab a prehensile tentacled bastard.
And he thought, things couldn't get worse right?
Well, they just fucking did.
Yoongi's globular eyes twitched with contempt as he saw the suave , tall, striking prominent emissary, Sir Kaelith of the Andorre Nebula talk and interact with his Y/N. The guy walked like he was floating.
Yoongi gritted his stubby little teeth, even damaging his gums in the process. He was about to draw blood. The dude's devastating bone structure and angular jaw line that could cut through Xalaxian steel intimidated Yoongi. What if she ran away with this smooth talking , assless bastard. What was Yoongi to do? Smile as the woman of his dreams married and had kids with this fool?
His eyes were glued to the two of them. The guy who wasn't him extended his hand to Y/N. And that is when Yoongi could literally feel the fumes pour out his ears, he was about to see red.
Y/N looked up at this guy sweetly , stepping into the alien emissary's arms as he fluidly ushered her into a lively dance , twirling her as he encircled her waist with his strong arms.
Across the room , Yoongi was shattering. His eyebrows twitched maniacally, his form started flickering , the flute of a wine glass he was tightly gripping cracked. If he didn't do something now , he would fly into a gelatinous rage.
And we all know that King Yoongi in his goopy form, could not be controlled. His chief secretary paled at the thought. The king had no point of return once he flew off the handle. Unhinged was one way to describe the king in his fury. Insane, mad, savage may be other accurate descriptors as well.
The cherry on top of the messed up sundae was when Y/N hugged the ambassador.
That's when King Yoongi's chief secretary pressed the red button on his wrist watch.
Well, at least they could say they tried to control the situation that was about to transpire.
