Summary: What the members would be like with a plus-sized partner
Warnings: mentions of body image issues and fatphobia (I tried to keep it light tho), slightly suggestive, swearing, not proofread
A/N: Thanks to my darling @bethanysnow for this request. This is something I’ve actually wanted to write for a while but for some reason hadn’t gotten around to. It’s essentially just more dating headcanons but with a focus on plus sized partners bc we need more representation in the fandom dammit!
Masterlist
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Jin:
He’s said in the past that his ideal s/o was someone on the chubbier side, but I honestly think he might struggle a bit with what all that actually entails? Not that he’s shallow or anything, but with the Korean beauty standard as harsh as it is, I think he would be confronted with a fair bit of internal stuff he needs to address.
He would absolutely adore you, though. I see him becoming friends first, just based on his personality, instantly becoming each other's comfort person, but I also think it takes him a while to fully trust and let himself be open with someone. He tends to internalize a lot in favor of keeping things light and unserious, so if he allows himself to be vulnerable with you, you’re a member of one of the most elite clubs ever.
I know a lot people think he would maybe have quite a bit of ‘culture shock’, for lack of a better term, when it comes to things like the treatment of plus sized people, but as we’ve seen on his more recent solo content, he’s a lot more observant than we realize. Not to say there won’t be moments where he’s caught off guard or misses something passive aggressive, but I think he’s a lot better at navigating those situations than we’d expect.
Like, we’ve seen how he handles a lot social conventions and pressures, he very polite but genually dosen’t give a fuck. He’s really good at casually reassuring and defending you(like when he shut down the guy on run!Seokjin who was teasing his co-host). He knows what it's like to be judged only by how you look, and so I could see him being pretty defensive/protective over you at times because of that.
Would be the type to discreetly have clothes at his place that would fit you and waits to bring them out when the opportunity presents, like “oh you’re cold? Here, have this sweater!”
If topics like diets and weight loss make you uncomfortable, he would be very diligent about changing the topic, regardless of who was around. Your comfort is always his top priority no matter what.
He would love date nights in together where you can cook together. Even if you’re not into cooking necessarily, he’ll happily turn it into your own personal cooking show,(he would totally have one of those ‘kiss the chef’ aprons)
He’s surprisingly touchy-feely with you. Like it’s not even in a sexual sense, he just takes a great deal of comfort in feeling you in his hands. Love love loves laying on you, you’re his new favorite pillow, and he loves having you lay on him as well. He won’t hear of you trying to argue and say you’re too heavy, he thinks you’re perfect and he wants you on him at every possible opportunity.
Yoongi:
It’s well known that Yoongi’s very introspective and understanding. He’s the type of person where body size either doesn’t even cross his mind or he’s very conscious of it.
Not in a bad way, though. It’s moreso in the sense of yeah, he’s aware you’re bigger, but it’s usually just a simple detail about you like your hair or eye color. But if you’re having a bad body image day or someone’s trying to give you shit, he’s all over it before you can even blink, hyping you up and shutting down any negative comments.
On a more intimate one-on-one level, this mf doesn't give a single fuck about how you look. You could be dressed to the nines or vegged out in sweats on the couch and he would still be swooning over you
He loves how soft and squishy you are? Like we’re talking peak cat behavior with him laying on you, doing the squishy paw move as he buries his face in your chest. You’re basically his favorite napping spot and stim toy
Always encourages you to eat well and not waste a thought on diets. You’ll come home after a shitty day and your favorite food/dessert will just be waiting in the fridge for you. He’ll play it off though if you ask him.
“What’s this?”
“It was on sale at the store,” He replies, barely looking up from his phone. “Why? Do you not like that one anymore?”
“No, I do-”
“Good.”
And that’s it, no questions, no admitting he went to three different stores to find it, just his secret little grin when he sees how happy it made you.
If you’re feeling bad about yourself, he always addresses it very quickly and simply, not wanting to dignify them much by giving them more of your time than absolutely necessary. Just "That's bullshit. I think the real issue we need to worry about is your eyesight, because if you think you’re anything other gorgeous, we need to get you some fucking glasses.” And that would be it, he’d give you a kiss on the head and walk away.
If it was really serious tho, he would listen and try to help and comfort you. He knows he's not gonna change how you feel with some grand gesture, it takes slow, consistent work, and he's committed to being there with you every step of the way reminding you how much he loves you.
He would 100% make sure that there are clothes you can wear in his closet but will never say anything about it.
I imagine him being very clingy in the mornings, arm looped around your waist keeping you close. If you try to get up, he’ll yank you back into the bed, half-laying on top of you now like a stubborn cat, face buried in your chest as he grumbles about it being too early and you ‘can’t leave him here like this’(this being alone in bed).
Hobi:
As soon as he laid eyes on you, he was smitten. Everything about you just drew him in. Your eyes, your smile, your curves. God he bet you look beautiful when you danced…
Cut to Jimin smacking his arm to snap him back to reality and him immediately coming over to introduce himself.
There would be no friends first phase this time with Hobi, or if there is, it’s extremely brief because he genuinely can’t keep a secret worth shit, especially not when it involves how head over heels he is for you. Like, even he doesn’t fully understand it, you’re like his muse or something(Mona Lisa starts playing lol)
All that aside tho, I think he would have the most like random(?) hurdles to get over in regard to dating someone bigger? Not that he’s oblivious or anything, but I think growing up with the Korean beauty standard being drilled into their heads so much, he’s gonna have some slightly skewed perceptions and ideas about bigger bodies that he’d have to unlearn in order for the relationship to grow properly.
Like, there are just so many little things that affect bigger bodies that some people don’t seem to realize, like even something as simple as whether or not the chairs at a restaurant have arms, or if a shop has really narrow pathways can affect whether we can navigate those places or feel comfortable? Once he becomes aware of those things tho, he’s watching for them everywhere.
Is appalled at how restricted and isolated plus size fashion is. Like excuse the fuck outta you, his baby will be wearing whatever designer brand they want, even if he has to threaten a few of his brand deals to get his way(lowkey mafia au Hoseok right here, just saying)
I think the main place he might struggle would be if you had trouble with keeping up with his lifestyle. Like he’s constantly on the move, going to events, working on new projects, touring. It’s hard for even the fittest person to keep up with, let alone if you have mobility issues or get tired more easily. It might take some work to figure out the balance between the two of you, but it honestly helps him remember to breathe? Like it’s okay to not go at breakneck speed through everything,
Is your biggest hype man ever tho, always gushing over how gorgeous you look and how lucky he feels to have you in his life.
Gives you soo many happy squishy hugs. He’s such cuddly softie and you’re literally the perfect hug shape in his opinion, so you’re getting cuddled, snuggled, and squeezed at every opportunity
Namjoon:
Man has written too many lines about bigger/thicker partners in his songs for him not to be into plus sized partners, alright? Like the proof is literally there in black and white.
He’s definitely the type to be friends first, not for lack of interest in you, but because of his own hesitancies and trust issues. He’s had his trust betrayed enough in the past that he tends to keep people at arms length at first till he knows that he’s safe with them.
Once you’re together though, the man is obsessed with you. Like his hands are constantly resting or holding onto your hips and thighs or caressing the sides of your waist. Like for someone who’s claimed to not be very into skinship, he’s very into it with you.
It’s no secret that this dude is BUILT, okay? Like those arms are made for lifting and manhandling you about. And he loves that with a bigger partner he doesn’t have to be worried about breaking you. Goodness knows one good spank from him would probably send a person flying across the room if they don't have some sort of padding.
On a more innocent level though, he’s also very soft with you. You regularly end up staying up half the night talking about thoughts and feelings that you don’t usually feel safe or comfortable sharing with anyone else. He values intellectual intimacy even more than physical intimacy.
I really see him dating someone in the arts, but maybe not necessarily in the music industry. He would enjoy a slight level of separation between your two worlds. Like if you’re an artist, one of the things he loves about going to events to support you is how in your spaces he’s “Y/n’s boyfriend”. Not RM, not BTS, just Namjoon. Your Namjoon.
I also think despite how observant and in tune he thinks he is, he would still catch himself falling for and having to unlearn certain fat stereotypes. Just like “My being fat does not inherently mean that I can cook.” “Right, sorry…”
Honestly I think he’s the most casual with his partner? Like he will accidentally call your bro or dude(or not accidentally, if you’re cool with it). There will be moments where he needs to talk about something and he'll just be like “Can I have a bro moment?” “Sure, *makes show of dabbing him up* whatcha need?”
He’s also soo fucking protective of you though, like he will not tolerate anyone even looking at you the wrong way. If you’re having a tough day or not feeling your best, he will do everything in his power to make you feel better, or at least make sure you know that he’s there for you.
Jimin:
Tbh, I think out of everyone, Chim would struggle the most with dating a bigger person. And most of it is because of his own internal complexes.
Like he grew up doing a lot of martial arts and dance where there is such a focus on what your body can do and how it looks. That combined with how he’s been critiqued in the past for looking ‘chubby’(which is such bullshit, but anyone who has rounder features is labeled that way regardless of their actual weight bc people are dumb) it’s made him think far more critically and not constructively about body.
Despite his own issues, he has a very soft image about what he sees as beauty. One of my favorite clips is him telling Joon about how he saw this elderly couple and how their soft, caring manner for each other really resonated with something in his heart, and I think he really wants that for him and his partner as well. He wants a love that is gentle like that, where you are each other’s safe landing point.
Which is why I think that he would date a teddy bear. Like I’m picturing soft, kinda nerdy science teacher/librarian vibes(totally not leaning into his kindergarten teacher vibes lol). He’s drawn to your cozy aura, and loves how comfortable and safe you make him feel. Lowkey think it plays a little bit into a noona thing? But that’s a topic for another day lol.
Y’all definitely have the whiny boyfriend - calming partner vibe(I just picture that meme of Grizzy from we bear bears crushing NomNoms to his chest lol)
He’s lowkey soo protective of you tho? Like he knows that you can technically take care of yourself, but if you’re ever feeling uncomfortable, or if someone is treating you poorly, he’s stepping in and quietly, but effectively, shutting it down.
He borders on overprotecting you sometimes, though. Like how he doesn’t like anyone talking about dieting of things like that around you, because he’s aware of how toxic these cultures can be and how easily they can get under your skin, so he doesn’t want to even give them the chance. Doesn’t matter how many times you tell him you’re okay, he still worries and watches out for you everywhere you go.
He loves how casually intimate the two of you are. He’s always touching and caressing your hips or waist or arms, and is soo happy if you’re the same with him. Similar to Jin, there’s nothing even sexual about his touches(most of the time) he just loves feeling you close, each little touch is like a silent message between the two of you like “I see you, I love you”
Taehyung:
I totally see Tae dating a muscle mommy, bc he is baby. Like if you can carry him? Ooooh he’s gonna koala you soo fucking hard, lol. Loves being wrapped up in your arms more than almost anything else in the world.
He doesn’t really pay too much mind to your size honestly? At least on a surface level. He falls in love with your energy and personality first and then your body. Which yeah sounds cliche and a little frustrating honestly, but that’s just how he works. It might take him a while to realize that comparing you to statues and paintings from the renaissance doesn’t quite answer your question of if he finds you hot, but he catches on eventually.
He’s kinda obsessed with you tho honestly, he’s always touching and cuddling you, nuzzling into your chest or tummy, and leaving little kisses on any bare skin he happens across.
Gives extra love to the places he notices you’re more self-conscious about, tracing over your stretch marks or caressing your rolls with an almost reverent tenderness.
Being with him is just so domestic tho? Like he is just this big ol' teddy bear(especially now that he’s bulked up from the military). He brings you flowers all the time, takes you out for brunch dates every weekend, buys y’all matching pajamas, etc
Loves how you take care of him, whether it’s making him dinner or just holding him when he’s feeling down. He feels soo safe and protected in your arms.
He really loves it though when you’re open and vulnerable with him. Being plus size, you tend to develop a thick skin to protect yourself because people, and society at large, can be ridiculously cruel. And so it’s a little harder to let people in sometimes. But with Tae, he wants nothing more than to be your soft safe place where you don’t have to pretend. It doesn’t matter what’s bothering you, he’s always ready and waiting with a hug no matter what, and it makes his heart swell with so much pride and love when you let be there for you.
So soft and encouraging. He’s always doing cute little gestures to cheer you up, like the ‘when life gives tangerines’ pose thing. Anything he can do to get a smile out of you is worth it.
Jungkook:
I honestly think he would be in denial that he likes you at first? Not because of your size, he’s like this with everyone he likes. Like he flirts with you constantly, teases you, even engages a lot of casual skinship, but he always holds off on calling it anything more than friendship. He’s just afraid of commiting and then fucking things up, so he thinks it’s better to stay as just friends, until you finally corner him and get him to fess up.
I feel like he thinks he’s above having any sort of toxic perceptions of bigger bodies, until you call him out one day for some offhand joke or comment that he made. He may not have meant anything by it, just trying to tease you like he does his other friends, but once you explain how those comments come across and how they’ve been weaponized, he’s horrified and begging forgiveness.
But once you get through those early rough patches, you have the biggest dork and hype man on your hands.
Quietly squeals and does lil happy hands every now and then because he randomly remembers like “omg, I'm dating this person!!”
Quietly supports everything you do. Like, he’ll hide outside the door when he hears you singing, having his own mini hype party for you, bc he knows if he comes in, you’ll get shy and stop.
He dotes on you all the time and is soo fucking touchy. He loves just laying on you, squishing your face in his hands and kissing you whenever you start to complain. He can’t help it, you’re just so soft and warm, he’s practically addicted to touching you.
He would work really hard to better educate himself about that actual science and facts about plus size bodies, and to try and be more in tune with your needs and any subjects that are particularly sensitive for you.
But also, everybody know that boy is soo fucking strong. Like he we’ve seen how much time he spends training and building up his body, he would love being able to show off to you by picking you up and manhandling you just a little bit(or a lotta bit, hehe)
Summary: As the Bangtan pack grows closer to Akira, they soon learn that their human Omega grows frustrated (sexually) with each passing day she spends with them. Tensions escalate. Boundaries are tested. Can Akira handle what Bangtan throws her way? Also, a surprise throws Akira into a deep tailspin.
Warnings: strong language (cursing), slight sexual tension, mentions of oral, mentions of fingering; reverse harem, polyamory relationship (parallel polyandry); lycan lore, strong language, breeding kink, heavy smut, strong violence, angst, parallel polyandry relationships, omegaverse, a/b/o, slow burn, trauma/healing themes, abusive family. mention of blood, extreme violence, sexual themes, heavy petting, physical abuse, etc. dni if you are not over 21.
WC: 9.9K
*author’s note at the end.
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“She’s been sitting outside for hours, shouldn’t we do something?”
Standing near the patio doors, the three maknaes watched as Akira sat on one of the benches in their enormous backyard. Jungkook could faintly see her holding something in her hand just as her shoulders slowly slumped down. They each watched as she wiped her face, a sign that she was crying. Taehyung moved to open the door, but Jimin stopped him, “Don’t.” He shook his head, telling the young Alpha not to bother her.
“But she’s crying, hyung! We can’t let her just sit there crying!” Taehyung pleaded.
“If we crowd her every time she’s upset, we’ll overwhelm her.” Jimin reasoned. They turned back to the door, watching as her body shook, releasing pent up tears that had been held for years, “Let her come to us. When she’s ready, we’ll be there. Come on, leave her be.” Jungkook pouted but obeyed, following a sulking Taehyung and a resolute Jimin back to their meeting room. Days after her grandmother visited, Akira had barely left her room. Feeling as though she’s been relegated to staying inside the house, Akira needed space. She needed air and moved her sulking to the backyard, hoping the fresh air might clear her head. She appreciated that the guys gave her space to deal with things on her own when she needed it, and lately, her thoughts jumbled around so much, too many voices would’ve overwhelmed her. She needed time.
The time spent alone gave her time to think about things. Akira decided that if she truly wanted to heal, if she really wanted to move forward with her pack, she had to be honest. With them and with herself, she had to be honest about her feelings and what got her to that point. The following day, Akira made the attempt to end her suffering, “Thank you for being here. This hasn’t been easy for me to do, but I made a decision and I’m ready to talk about it.”
One by one, the Bangtan pack stared at each other, confused as to why Akira called them to the dining room. Did they do something wrong? Was she unhappy? Was she leaving them? The fear slowly started to seep before she spoke again, “A few months ago Namjoon told me he loves me.” The silence grew louder as all eyes pointed to a calmly masked Namjoon who was slightly panicking on the inside, “That all of you love me…” Akira sighed softly, eyes remaining on the charm bracelet they gave her. She picked at their insignia, bottom lip wrung between her teeth as she tried to get her words out, “…I wanna tell you how much that means to me. How much having someone love you means to a person like me…even if I don’t know if I could ever say it back.”
“What are you trying to say, beautiful?” Yoongi urged gently.
“I’m saying I don’t know how to love someone.” Akira closed her eyes tightly, sighing as she reached into her pocket to pull out a folded up picture. Even though she threw away the frame, she still held onto the picture, reaching into the trash to retrieve it once she realized she couldn’t let it go. Akira carefully sat down and slowly slid the picture to the closest person seated near her, which was Yoongi. “I wasn’t raised to experience that. I wasn’t taught that. To love someone back, to give them your heart…I don’t know how to do that, and I don’t know when or if I can ever do that.” Akira could barely look them in the eyes. Afraid that they’d be disappointed in her, or worse.
“Is this you when you were a baby?” Taehyung asked as the picture finally reached him, sitting near the head of the table next to Namjoon. As the picture made itself around the table, Akira nodded,
“Me and my sisters, yeah…” Hoseok could tell something was off as he observed Akira’s fidgety demeanor. Just what did Akira and her grandmother talk about that made her this scared?
“Does this have to do with the decision you just mentioned?” He asked, holding up the picture. Akira nodded solemnly,
“I’ve decided to fully move on and I feel like the only way I can do that is if I tell you everything. I realize you guys only know part of my life, but not all of it. You hardly know me, just as I hardly know you. I don’t want that, so I’m gonna tell you everything.”
“Princess, are you sure?” Hoseok questioned softly, “If this is too much for you, you can always choose not to say anything, and we’ll respect that decision.”
“I have to.” Akira reasoned, “I’m not gonna be able to fully trust our relationship if I don’t. I know they’re the reason I have trust issues, I know they are the reason I hold back sometimes. Why I can’t ever bring myself to tell you I love you when I don’t understand it or ever felt it. I’m not letting them take up any more of my life.” Quietly, Yoongi reached out from her right, grabbing hold of her hand and squeezing reassuringly. Akira smiled weakly, glancing up for a moment to see his gentle gaze on her. She then took a deep breath, “The abuse started when I was young…”
Akira told them everything. From the time before she didn’t present and after. The beatings, the forced servitude, the sibling taunting, and the lack of rescue that never came. Even how bad her father got, to the point where she attempted to end her life—The confession alone made their skin crawl with painful unease. The only people who genuinely cared for her were her grandmother and her mother, though Akira still struggled with believing the latter. Though she couldn’t see it, their faces ranged from shock and horror to sadness and anger. Jungkook gripped the table to keep from turning, his irises flickering from dark brown to blood red. Jin, usually the most reserved of the group, kept shouting curse words throughout the mind-link, completely taking the pack aback by his strong use of language. Taehyung tried to keep a straight face, but every so often, his brows would furrow and his lips would tremble, face crumbling to shed tears. Jimin, stoic as ever, even managed to turn red as his eyes watered and he’d casually wiped tears away.
Namjoon clenched his jaw so tight he thought he was going to crack a molar. Yoongi held onto Akira’s hand tightly, the only thing keeping him grounded to the earth right now and Hoseok? Hoseok was so lost in his own thoughts, that his face was the definition of pure rage. So calm, so collected, yet inside, fire burned. He hid his mouth behind his hand, chin resting in his palm as he listened to Akira speak of her trauma. At one point, the memories got so intense, Akira paused for a moment, wiping her tears away as she tried to get through it. Yoongi couldn’t take it anymore, “Enough, Akira…please, beautiful.” He begged her, face slowly reddening as his eyeline watered.
Akira whimpered, nodding in agreement. She knew she couldn’t continue, body shaking in her seat as the silence was suddenly noticeable. They sat in silence, but only for a moment. Yoongi stood, slowly pulling Akira’s chair away from the table. He bent down slowly, wrapping his arms around her shoulders before kissing her gently on the top of her head. Akira broke down in tears, hands firmly grasping onto Yoongi’s shoulder. They just sat there and let her cry. Yoongi felt a tear escape his eye, and then another, tightening his hug around her. His lips remained the same, gently pressing deeper onto her head.
The men slowly started wiping their faces; sniffles and coughs echoed in the space. Akira turned her body, burying her face in Yoongi’s chest. He let her cry into his shirt, not caring if it got wet. Jin quietly removed himself from the table, along with Jungkook. Namjoon understood they needed some time alone, to process everything they just heard, if he needed a moment to fully comprehend it. How did Akira manage to survive years of abuse, he wondered? How could a family hurt one of their own?
— — —
“Look at her, hyung. I don’t think she fully knows how we all feel about her. Or at least, she still doesn’t fully comprehend it.”
Namjoon and Jin watched from the patio doors as Akira learned to play Go with Yoongi. They were once again outside on the backyard patio, enjoying the summer heat. It had been nearly three months since Akira moved in with them and the atmosphere around them definitely changed. The air felt lighter and the tension was over. Akira had fully recovered by now, and acclimated into their pack as if she was meant to be there all along. She brought a certain joy that wasn’t there before, and everyone felt it. Namjoon made his intentions clear with Akira, that he is fully in love with her, just as the rest of his pack mates were. They didn’t rush her into reciprocation, as she was still trying to accept her own feelings, as well as come to terms with being treated better than she’s ever been treated before. They all knew it would take time for that part of her heart to develop into something more, and they fully respected that, giving her patience and understanding.
“I understand. How can someone who knows nothing but pain comprehend love?” Jin turned to Namjoon, the rhetorical question hanging in the air, “She’s truly remarkable, our Omega.” Jin smiled softly as Akira laughed loudly, jumping in her seat as she learned a new move from Yoongi. His gummy smile peaked slightly as he watched her excitement. Akira’s arrival was an easy adjustment for everyone. Everyday, for three months, everyone pitched in to help speed things along in her recovery, whether it be physically or mentally. The feeling of safety was their biggest concern for her, and once they knew that she felt safe, it opened up a lot of possibilities for them.
“I’m still worried hyung. Her wolf hasn’t presented yet.” Namjoon bit down on his bottom lip, his brow furrowed while his eyes watched Akira through the glass doors.
“I say give it time.” Jin smiled, watching the joy spread across Akira’s face, “If nothing changes, we love her for who she is.”
“She makes me so happy it scares me.” Jin turned to Namjoon again after his confession, “This pack hasn’t experienced this kind of joy in a long time. I’m worried it won’t last.”
“Waiting for the other shoe to drop won’t help either, Joon-ah. So embrace the now while we still have it.” Jin patted Namjoon on the back before leaving to head to the kitchen, starting on lunch. Namjoon sighed before opening the patio doors, making his presence known. Yoongi and Akira looked up, both smiling as Namjoon approached them,
“Akira, I need to speak with you for a moment. Mind if I steal you away?” Akira stood from her seat, giving Yoongi a sweet smile to let him know she’ll be right back. Namjoon held out his hand for her and walked her back inside the house, leading her upstairs to his bedroom. Akira was a little nervous, but Namjoon assured her, “It’s not what you think. This is just where my personal office is.” Namjoon chuckled. Inside the equally large room, nearly as massive as hers, Namjoon’s desk sat facing large windows. The desk faced the bedroom door, with dark bookshelves lined on either side; some books even spilled out on the floor, stacked in neat piles. The large king bed sat on the opposite wall facing the electric fireplace across from it. The soft neutral colors of cream and green contrasted the dark stained wood. This was the first Akira had ever entered one of their rooms.
“What is it you need to talk about?” Akira followed Namjoon to his desk, where he sat on top of it. He made room for her, spreading his legs for her to stand between. His hand still firmly clasped hers, afraid of her reaction.
“I heard from Jackson yesterday.” Akira nodded, waiting patiently, “Naomi wants to talk to you.” At the sound of her name, Akira visibly stiffened. Namjoon knew the topic of family was still a sore spot for her, but he had to at least relay the message, “I told them I would talk with you, but that there’d be no promises.”
“I can’t Joonie.” Akira shook her head; the thought of entertaining Naomi made her blood run cold, “I can’t—I don’t wanna see her. I meant what I said, "I don't want her in my life.”
“I know baby, I understand.” Namjoon caressed her cheek with his other hand. He sighed once he saw the hurt and anger surface on her face, “I’d never force you to do anything you don’t want to. But just so you know, there will be times when our packs have to be in each other’s presence. There’s events we cannot miss.”
Akira looked away, “Will this cause problems with their pack for you?”
“No, we’re still brothers, regardless of what happens between you and Naomi. I wanted to let you know the door’s still open.” Namjoon shrugged, watching the turmoil on Akira’s face. Her sigh brought her shoulders down, the tension in her body leaving her. Namjoon pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist, “It’s ok baby, you don’t have to do it.”
“I’m finally in a good place, Joonie.” Akira whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck, “I was starting to feel safe and then she reminded me that she’s always gonna be a part of my life. They all are…” She dropped her head on his shoulder, making him squeeze tighter.
“Tell me what you need. What can I do to make it better?” Namjoon asked.
“I don’t know.” Akira pulled back, staring down into his eyes, “I don’t know…”
“As your man, my job is always to protect you. I wanna do that, but I wish I knew how without having to ask.”
“My man?” Akira smirked, making Namjoon chuckle. His deep laugh stirred this warm feeling inside the pit of her stomach. Her back straightened, pushing her chest out towards him. Namjoon shamelessly scanned her body. Akira wore a light blue 90s style babydoll patchwork dress. It was oversized enough that concealed parts of her body, yet short enough to stop just above her knees. The tiny pearlescent buttons at the top unbuttoned just enough to show cleavage. Namjoon wasn’t complaining and neither were the guys.
“Ain’t I your man?” Namjoon licked his lips slowly, making Akira catch her breath. His grip tightened when she didn’t reply, “Ain’t I your man?”
“Yes.” Akira replied breathlessly.
“Yes, what?” Namjoon challenged.
“Yes, Alpha.” Akira gulped, the small squeak of her voice made a growl erupt from his chest. Akira jumped, lost in the heavy scent of his pheromones; the sweet coconut and leather wrapped around her like a syrupy vice. Namjoon only needed to glance at her lips once before the irresistible pull magnetized them both into a kiss. Lips rushed and busied themselves with faint moans and groans escaping them both. Akira fell into his body; Namjoon pulled her even possibly closer, his fingers digging into her hips as hers played with the nape of his neck. One hand traveled along her spine, clasping at the back of her neck, making her gasp softly. “Joonie…”
Namjoon tried desperately to control his wolf. His eyes turned blood red, making Akira gasp once more. Her scent was thick and heavy in the air; the sugary scent wafted out into the hallway even with the door closed. Akira could feel the slick between her legs, body craving more of his touch but Namjoon restrained them both, “Akira.”
“Did I do something wrong?” Akira asked quietly, nervousness creeping up her spine. Namjoon shook his head, iris fading to their natural color as he quickly shushed all doubt,
“No, no beautiful, you didn’t, no.” He pecked her lips repeatedly, reassuring her as her head tilted back in his hand. She didn’t know it, but she bared her neck to him, making him groan. “I’m just finding it very hard to control myself.”
“If you wanna stop, we can.” Akira softly spoke, “I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.”
“Trust me, you’re doing the opposite.” Namjoon spoke into her neck, kissing slowly and gently. Akira’s breath grew heedy. Open mouth kisses trail from the base of her neck and just below the base of her ear. Namjoon teased lightly, biting down just behind her ear. Akira gasped, gripping his neck as her eyes rolled back. Her slick dripped into her panties, arousal could probably be smelled from the hallway. “Fuck, you make crazy.”
“Joonie—oh!” Akira was surprised he stood, picking her up by the back of her thighs. She held onto him, mildly turned on by his dominance, but also nervous for what he was about to do, “Joonie, I don’t think I’m ready for this.”
“Baby, I can smell how wet you are.” He confessed, making her body run warm with embarrassment, “I can’t give you the kind pleasure I want, but at least let me take care of you.” He offered.
“H-How would you d-do that?” Akira shook nervously as he walked to his bed and finally laid her down on the soft comforter.
“You giving me permission?” He asked softly. The hunger in his eyes was noticeable. Akira hesitated, still nervous about what he would do. She wasn’t sure what he would do to take care of her and honestly, it was nerve wracking. But she trusted him, that was for sure, and she knew he would never hurt her. So she nodded for him to continue, “Words baby. Use your words.” He smirked at her.
“Yes, Joonie.” Akira moaned. Namjoon’s body towered over hers. His arms bulged as he used his strength to stay upright, flexing beneath his thin, white t-shirt. Akira’s knees braced themselves at his hips. Her eyes slowly traveled at every feature, from the moles under his bottom lip and cheek, to the fleshy pectorals peeping below his collarbone. Akira thought he looked like a god.
Namjoon slowly moved his right hand up her calf, then smoothly to the flesh of her outer thigh, disappearing beneath her dress. Her sandal fell off with ease, leg hooking around his waist for support, “You trust me, beautiful?”
Akira nodded quickly, “I trust you, Joonie.” Her other sandal fell as he pushed her leg further apart, resting his hips fully against hers. Akira’s chest rose and fell rapidly, welcoming him closer as he pressed his lips against hers. With the roll of his hip, Akira felt the brush his hardened length rub against her clit. She moaned into the kiss, rolling her hips back in response to his. Taking the opportunity, Namjoon licked into her mouth, massaging his tongue with hers. He rolled his hips again, firmer this time. Akira moaned louder, gasping as their lips smacked together. “Fuck, Joon—!”
“I promise I’ll make you feel good baby.” He whispered to her, “Just let go and let me take care of you.” Akira followed her instincts and stopped overthinking. Namjoon continuously ground his pelvis into herself, his thick length continued to brush her clit. Akira never dry humped anyone before, but it was definitely something she could cross off her list. The wet patch in her panties grew as more of her pussy leaked. The fabric tightened, giving her friction to use to keep her moaning louder. Namjoon moved faster, dropping his lips to her neck, sucking firmly across her skin. The heady smell of coconut kissed at her nose, eyes dilating as heat flushed her body, “Namjoon!”
“I know baby, you feel it, right? That feeling that makes you wanna squeeze around me?” Akira nodded desperately, needing to know what that feeling was, "That's your body wanting to release, baby, you wanna cum.”
“Fuck, Joonie, please…” Akira begged, feeling his teeth sinking gently onto the tops of her breasts.
“Not yet, baby.” Namjoon teased, making her whimper, “If you’re gonna cum, you’re going to do so on my tongue.”
Akira squealed, feeling the tug of her underwear as Namjoon pulled on the fabric; feeling the wet cotton between his fingers. His kisses lowered down her body until he was raising her dress below her bra. Normally, Akira would feel insecure about her body: her stomach was too plushy, her thighs too big, her stretch marks canvasing all over. She was thick in places Namjoon couldn’t get enough. He loved her chubby fupa and her hip folds. He loved that she’ll have her thick, chocolate thighs squeezing his head soon. He even loved her pillowy folds as they glistened from arousal once he pulled her underwear completely off. The lips opened slowly; sticky wetness webbing from each side as her cute button-sized clit peaked out. Even the trim hair glistened, taking up her strong, syrupy scent. Namjoon could easily spend all day between her legs, but he wouldn’t deprive her of an orgasm. Not today, anyway, “I made you this wet baby? Did your Alpha do that for you?”
Akira took a moment to reply, distracted by the lazy drag of his fingers in between her folds. Sweat covered her neck as she moaned out in response, “Yes Alpha…”
“Can your Alpha have a taste, baby?” His eyes penetrated the deepest part of her soul. More slick trickled out, surprising Namjoon at just how little it took to turn her on.
“Yes, please…Please, please, plea—oh my god!” Akira’s back bowed just as Namjoon covered his mouth around her pussy. Her head was thrown back, hands clenching the covers as he devoured her. Namjoon held her thighs apart, lapping at her opening like a dog to a water bowl. Tongue darting in and out of her at a fast pace, Akira couldn’t help but grind against his face. “Joonie! Oh Joonie—fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” Her body shook as the bed springs squeaked. Certain that she would not close her legs, Namjoon let go of one of her thighs and hooked his middle finger inside of her. “Fuuuuck!”
His finger glided slowly at first, slowly down his tongue to match his lazy pace as his tongue circled her clit. He could hear the blood rushing to her heart. The trimmer in her breath. Her greedy hole sucked up his finger until he was knuckle deep, his smile against her clit showing how eager she was. “Grab my hair, Omega.”
Akira did as she was told, no alpha command needed. Her fingers tingled within his silvery gray locks, tightening as he added another finger. The stretch wasn’t unbearable, almost welcoming. Akira sucked in her breath, concentrating on the feel of his fingers and the warmth of his breath on her pussy. She shut her eyes tight, feeling the burn in her chest from lack of oxygen. The tickling sensation of his fingers scissoring and rubbing against her walls, moving deeper until they hit a soft, spongy spot had her groaning with pleasure. Namjoon watched as that pleasure intensified, watching her body lay in rapture. He kissed her inner thigh, “Breath baby.” Watched as her sudden gasp for air turned into a pleading whine for more friction. “You ready to cum baby? You want your Alpha to make you cum?”
Akira whimpered, tears pricking at her eyes, “P-Please A-Alpha…!” Namjoon groaned, biting into the soft flesh of her thigh before attacking her pussy once more. He sucked harshly on her clit while his fingers pistoned faster and faster. Akira pulled at his hair, making his eyes roll. The moans grew louder, “Ah! Ah! Ahh!” Her back arched once again as Namjoon continuously stroked her spot. She squeezed his fingers tighter and tighter, sucking him in deeper. She was so close, just a little more.
“My Omega! She tastes so sweet! I need to have her, I gotta have her!”
Namjoon growled, making Akira melt further into the bed, “Fuck Joonie, please let me cum!” Akira squirmed, feeling the blinding heat from her orgasm reaching her, “Alpha please!” She begged him.
“Cum.” The sudden permission released a chorus of moans unlike anything he’s heard before. Wrecked by his touch, Akira came undone; the band finally snapping as Namjoon released his fingers from her entrance and lapped up her juices. He held her thighs apart; enjoying the tug of his hair as she rode out her climax, grinding her pussy harder against him. His nose bumped her clit with each stroke. After he was finished lapping at her hole, he sucked harshly against her clit, pulling another orgasm from her. Tears released from Akira’s eyes; her body twisting as the overwhelming sensation wrecked her body. Namjoon held her waist and feasted on her, coaxing the second orgasm out until it left a dull ache. Her body trembled as Namjoon rose to his knees, mouth and chin glistening as he massaged her hips to sooth her. He watched tears trek down her cheeks and her tummy quiver.
Leaning down to place soft kisses on her thighs, her clit, and her stomach, he finally reached her lips again, letting her taste herself on his tongue. Her legs wrapped around his waist as her fingers combed through his hair. “Feel better?”
“I never felt anything like that.” Akira panted, “Is it always like that?”
Namjoon brushed his thumb across her cheeks, "Sometimes. Other times, it’s a lot more intense than that.”
“What about you?” Akira noted, feeling his heavy dick pressed against her pussy, “You didn’t get to cum.”
“Trust me, we’ll have plenty of time for that.” Namjoon assured, making her gasp, “For now, I’ll take care of it. You just get some rest, you can barely keep your eyes open.” Namjoon chuckled, watching as her heavy lidded eyes fought to stay open. Namjoon slowly pulled down her dress, lifting her legs to tuck her under the covers. Akira couldn’t deny that what just happened wore her out. The thudding in her chest slowly regulated as her eyes fluttered slowly, “But I want you to lay with me.”
Namjoon smiled, dimples pooling at his cheeks. He leaned down, kissing her nose, “Give me a few minutes to clean up and I’ll be back in your arms in no time.” While Akira closed her eyes for a nap, Namjoon went to take care of himself in his bathroom. Meanwhile, downstairs, everyone sat in the living, completely gobsmacked at what they just heard. If it wasn’t the heavy scent of her arousal permeating the entire house, her loud moans and screams surely gave it away. Taehyung and Jimin looked at each other, jaws dropped. Yoongi fixated on the memory of her moans, wondering what she looked like when she came. Jungkook closed his eyes, trying desperately not to get a boner and Jin and Hoseok paced the floor.
“I can’t believe he did that.” Jin murmured, “We didn’t discuss taking things further with her, we should’ve discussed it.”
“I’m actually jealous it’s not me.” Yoongi replied, clearly not caring about discussing their sex life with Akira. Jin glared at him, annoyed,
“Yoongi!”
“What?! Don’t act like you weren’t thinking it!” Yoongi rebuffed, “We knew one day we’d get to that part in our relationship, even if it is a little foreplay; she feels the most comfortable letting the Pack Alpha help her explore that side of her first, I say let it happen. Besides, if she’s comfortable enough for that, that means she trusts us.”
“Hate to say it but he has a point, hyung.” Hoseok agrees, “If she gave him consent, we can’t tell Joon not to please her. All we can do is hope he doesn’t push past her boundaries, which we know he wouldn’t do.”
“He won’t.” Jin argued, “I can’t say the same for his wolf; he’s been fighting for control since she came into our lives.”
“So then what should we do?” Jimin questioned, “Because I don’t feel comfortable telling him to control his wolf when we can barely control ours.”
“When he’s done, we have a meeting. We can’t just follow basic instincts, she’s still a human and I refuse to lose her trust because one of us couldn’t control ourselves and act without thinking. If we end up hurting her, we’ll not only lose her trust, we might lose her, and I refuse to let that happen.”
— — —
“Joon-ah. You have any idea how you could’ve jeopardized everything if you couldn’t control your wolf with her? She’s a human, her body can’t handle certain things.”
Namjoon felt like a kicked puppy, sitting there in the living room getting scolded by his hyung. He might’ve been the pack leader, but when the oldest of the pack speaks, you listen. Especially if that one is a Beta. After a much needed shower, Namjoon wasn’t all that surprised he got summoned. He promised Akira that he’d be back after his shower, and while she slept, the meeting was held. “I know hyung, and I’m sorry. I fought for the most part but the human part of me couldn’t help it either. We didn’t have actual sex, I knew my limits. I would never hurt her like that, you guys know that.”
“We do, hyung.” Jimin agreed, “We know you wouldn’t but the fact of the matter is, since she’s come into our lives, our wolves have been losing their shit. They keep fighting us. We’re not as synced as before, especially now that you’ve established a new boundary with her. We’re afraid that if we get close to her in that way, we won’t be in control of what we do.”
“I understand.” Namjoon nodded, looking down at his hands.
“We’re not here to scold you, Joon-ah. But this is a warning. If we end up hurting her because we lost control, it’ll scare her away, or worse.” Hoseok explained.
“I honestly don’t know how to fix it.” Namjoon sighed, “I can’t seem to get him to listen, it’s like my mind wants to split in half.” He groaned, digging the heel of his palm into his eye socket.
“Maybe we need to establish some rules then, for our wolves? Have a meeting while they’re present so that they know what’s happening.” Jungkook suggested.
“What kind of rules?” Yoongi frowned.
“Rules like not going any further until she tells us to.” Taehyung suggested, "And when she finally does decide to go all the way, we let her lead and set the pace. They’ll listen to their Omega if she feels like she’s in charge.”
“What do we do when our rut comes in? I’m not asking for outside help anymore, that would devastate her.” Jungkook shook his head, imagining how hurt Akira would be if they let another wolf service them.
“She said she wouldn’t mind, but deep down, I know she would.” Namjoon answered, “With her permission, I think the safest thing to do is to have someone in the room at all times. To keep the energy calm and peaceful.”
“You mean one of us watches?!” Jin gawked.
“Actually, I think the Betas should be the ones to monitor it.” Yoongi agreed, “You guys barely have a rut, you’re more level headed when it comes to tense situations and if one of us gets out of hand, you can always defuse the situation.”
“There’s no way she’d agree to that.” Jimin scoffed.
“How would you know?” At the sound of her voice, they each turned their heads towards the top of the staircase. No one had heard Akira leave Namjoon’s room. Her puffy face thick with sleep, dress wrinkled from previous activity, and hair in a wild curly mane. And still, she looked as regal as ever in their eyes, making her way down the stairs with soft pitter patter of her bare feet.
“We thought you were napping, princess.” Hoseok greeted her, wiping the sleep from her eyes as she approached him. She stared up at him, her brown doll-like eyes filled with enough temptation to make him crack.
“I was until I realized Joonie wasn’t next to me.” She turned, finding him sitting on the couch with an apologetic expression, “Please don’t be upset with him about earlier, guys. I had as much responsibility in it as he did.”
“Namjoon’s not in trouble princess, we’re just trying to figure out the best way to navigate this part of our relationship with you without hurting you. We’ve never dated a human before, we don’t know all of what your body can handle.” Hoseok explained.
“If it’s about our relationship and my body, shouldn’t I be a part of that discussion?” Akira frowned, confused as to how the pack they claim she’s a part of decided to hold a meeting without her, “If I’m your Omega like you claim I am, shouldn’t I be present?”
“You’re right,” Namjoon held out his hand to her, prompting her to move towards the couch. She grabbed his hand, making her way to his lap, “we should’ve included you, and we’re sorry. We were trying to best bring up the subject with you without making you uncomfortable or making it awkward.”
“We don’t want to physically hurt you. This is very new for us.” Hoseok admitted.
“This is new for me too, Hobi.” Akira urged, “I am learning how to trust people again and finding what works for me. This is the first time I ever had anyone ever care about me, and I’m beyond grateful for that…but I’m 26 years old, and I’m just now figuring out sex as an adult, stuff that wasn’t taught to me in high school. I’m finding that I have actual free will and I want to experience things I’ve never experienced before. I know you’re all worried, I am too.” Akira looked around the room at their concerned faces, “But I can’t stay scared at every little thing that comes up in our relationship, I don’t want us to live like that.”
“You’re right.” Namjoon whispered, squeezing her hip, “We need to focus on what’s best for you and your relationship with us, going forward.”
“Thank you.” This was the first time Akira has been heard and acknowledged. It was an odd experience to have. “Look, I know that this is probably strange, or at least for me it was. I never had 7 boyfriends before, or mates? I’m not really sure what we’d call this.” Akira became flustered, trying to get her thoughts in order, “All I know is I want this work, however it can work. And if that means being monitored when I eventually make love to one of you, then so be it.”
“Would you honestly be comfortable with that?” Jin genuinely asked.
“It would be awkward but eventually all of you will see me naked at some point, I see no sense in making it weird now. It’s not like I don’t know you guys didn’t hear us earlier, I’m pretty much aware that we were loud.” Namjoon tilted his head, dimples popping up as his cheeks blushed. Akira gave him a small smile as her fingers played with the nape of his neck, “I was very shy when I first met you all…but you’ve seen me at my lowest, ugly cry and all, I see no reason to not be openly honest with you.”
“If it’s what you want then we’ll respect it.” Taehyung agreed.
“I feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable with you and even though it took a while to fully realize it, I’m happy where I am with all of you. Aren’t you happy with where we are with each other too?” Akira questioned everyone.
“Of course we are, Akira.” Jungkook sat up from the couch, making eye contact with her, “We’re so happy with how far you’ve come and how far our relationships with you have been. You’ve made us all happy.” Akira bit her lip, staring down at her hands. Jungkook grabbed her hand, moving her forward off of Namjoon’s lap and onto his, “We’re just concerned about safety, that’s all this is about. What we want is for you to be safe.”
“Ok Kookie.” Akira replied softly, nodding along to his words.
“We realize we have a lot to figure out before that comes, and we’re just struggling to get our wolves in check. Since you’ve arrived, things have been a little haywire.” Yoongi confessed.
Akira frowned, "What do you mean?”
“It’s getting harder to control the instinctive part of our minds. Werewolves, when their wolf presents, they build this connection with each other until we eventually form one mind.” Jin explained, “But lately, it’s been harder to control it.”
“So then why control it?” Akira shrugged, still lost.
“Because the wolf part of us doesn’t understand the capabilities of what it offers our human side. The physical strength alone is overwhelming sometimes, it takes a lot of brain power to not accidentally hurt anyone that’s not like us. Plus, it wants to forego boundaries and devour you.” Yoongi put it bluntly. Akira’s eyes widened, back straightening as she swallowed hard, “And not in the Big Bad Wolf sense either.”
“Must you be so blunt?” Jin sighed, covering his face.
“We just listened to her moaning for the past 15 minutes upstairs two hours ago, I think we’re past being diplomatic.” Yoongi scoffed. Akira gasped, hiding her face in her hands. Jungkook chuckled, rubbing his hand up and down her back.
“You two bicker on your own time, we need to figure out how to get our wolves under control.” Hoseok teased.
“…Am I able to talk to them?” Akira asked suddenly. Everyone grew concerned at the suggestion, not knowing how that would go.
“I don’t know if it’d be wise to have all our wolves present.” Hoseok worried.
Akira nodded solemnly before suggesting, “Well, if it were just one, then who would I need to talk to?”
“It would be the Head Alpha, sweetheart.” Yoongi answered for everyone. Akira turned to Namjoon, who nodded in agreement.
“Would you be ok with that, Joonie?” The softness of Akira’s voice made his wolf pur, practically belly up for her. Once Namjoon agreed, Akira wondered what she would say, “When can I speak with him? What do I say?” Akira looked around the group for the right answers, “How should I address him?”
“You can talk to him now, princess.” Hoseok nodded forward with his head, bringing Akira’s attention over to Namjoon. His eyes were a dark, blood red. Practically fully dilated and staring straight at Akira. Around her, everyone bowed, a sign of respect and acknowledgment of their leader. Akira nervously gave a bow too, unsure of what to say. When he spoke, Akira couldn’t recognize the voice as her Joonie. No. This was completely someone else. Something else.
“Come, Akira.” The deep timber of the Alpha made Akira jump to her feet instinctively. Nervously, the pack watched, trying to get a feel of where their leader was at. He wasn’t cruel, just authoritative. When he commanded respect, he got it. “Why did you summon me?”
“I-I wan—um,” Akira looked around the room; their encouraging faces assured her that everything would be ok. Akira took a deep breath, then exhaled, “I wanted to know why you no longer want to listen to Namjoon. Why none of the wolves will listen to their human side.”
“We want our Omega. She is hiding. She is afraid.” The Alpha responded. Akira tilted her head, confused. She moved in closer; Jimin scooted towards the edge of his seat, just in case. Akira slowly reached out her hand, mindful of the way the Alpha watched her.
“I’m not hiding, Joonie. I’m right here.” The Alpha closed his eyes, inhaling her scent as her hand drew closer. Landing softly on his head, Akira brought her hand down to his cheek. Those red eyes bore into her, “I’m right here.”
“She is not safe. Omega does not feel safe. We want to find her, bring her home. We make Omega safe.” The Alpha rolled his head into her palm, recognizing his Omega’s scent but still not sensing her.
“He means your wolf.” Taehyung answered Akira’s unasked question, finally realizing what the Alpha meant, “He understands the human part of you, but we can’t connect with you. Not like how we’re all connected. That’s why our wolves aren’t listening to us.” It made perfect sense to them. Their pack is able to link and connect to one another, sharing thoughts, feelings—a bond. Their wolves couldn’t find it with Akira. They weren’t sure if her wolf delayed presenting or if she was just fully human. They could sense her, but not fully.
“Alpha Joon,” Jin addressed him with the equal amount of authority, “Akira is human. We don’t know if her wolf is delayed or if she is just human, but she is here and she is safe with us. We protect her like you ask. She cannot connect with us yet, but she is here.” Akira bit her lip, feeling tears surface at the edge of her eyes. All this time, he was worried for her. They all were. Akira moved to stand in between his legs, making his attention go back to her. She cupped his face with both hands, drawing her forehead to his,
“I’m safe Joon.” She whimpered, “You can’t feel it, but I am safe. Please, baby, I’m here, please..,” her shaky voice brought out their concern, “Please Joonie, your Omega is safe. Just cause I don’t have a wolf, doesn’t mean I’m not here. I’m yours. For as long as you all will have me, I’m yours…please? Alpha please…” Her tears hit his cheek. The swift movement of his arms wrapping around her waist made the others jump with fear, worried his strength might overtake her. He pressed his head into the pudge of her stomach, finding her scent strong and irresistible.
“Omega is safe. We keep her safe.” Akira bent forward, kissing the top of his head. She wrapped her arms around his shoulder, rubbing her chin over his head. Everyone watched in awe as she comforted him. Him, pressing his face into her stomach where her womb lies; her, scenting him without even realizing it. It was beautiful. It was emotional. It was everything they thought it would be. Akira was truly theirs, and they didn’t have to do anything to force it. It was natural—instinctive.
“I’m safe baby, I promise.” She whispered. Akira let go and got down on her knees. Once she met his eyes, she knew the Alpha was listening, “Can you tell the others that I’m ok? If we’re gonna enter this new stage in our relationship, they can’t lose control of themselves from their humans. You don’t wanna hurt me, Alpha, I know you don’t.” Akira pleaded, rubbing her hands along his arms.
“It’s amazing how in control she is. I’ve never seen Alpha Joon this subdued before.” Hoseok was astonished. Watching their leader practically bend to Akira’s will proved that their mate had literal power over all of them. If she could convince the Alpha to connect back with his human, she could do much more within their pack.
“We will not harm you, Omega.” The Alpha reassured, “We love you.” Akira slowly smiled, squeezing his arms in her hands. She soon did the unexpected, tilting her head back and to the side, baring her throat to him. The gasps from the other pack members watched in surprise, wondering how she relinquished her position so easily. The Alpha, whose sharpened teeth bared themselves in an approving growl, brought his mouth to her neck. He bit down, a teasingly light nip to her throat as a promise of one day marking her. He used his tongue instead, marking the sweet spot that one day would be his. Akira faced him once more, holding his face in her again,
“Bring my Joonie back, please? I need you both.” Akira pleaded softly. Blood irises swirled like thick red smoke as they turned back to the deep brown that belonged to Namjoon. His eyes regained their natural color, slowly shrinking back in size. He looked around confused, almost as if he’d been asleep. Akira smiled, her tears all but vanished as she stood on her knees and threw her arms around his neck, “You’re ok!” She mumbled into his shoulder.
“What happened?” Namjoon looked around, confused. One arm wrapped around Akira’s body out of instinct as he looked towards his pack, "How long was I out?”
“Not long. Enough for Alpha Joon to fix things.” Jin replied.
“Wait,” Akira pulled back, looking up at Namjoon, “you mean you don’t…you don’t remember any of that?”
“When our wolves take over fully, we’re not present.” Yoongi explained, “It’s almost like we’re asleep. The human mind rests while the wolf takes control. You aren’t able to hear his mind because we’re not linked to you but he made it very clear to our wolves that we needed to reconnect. If not for your safety then for the safety of our pack and those who depend on us.”
“Did I scare you, baby?” Namjoon asked, brushing a thumb across her lips. Akira shook her head ‘no’, returning back to her position, placing her face into his shoulder. His strong scent nearly masked hers, engulfing her body.
The day’s events drained everything it could out of Akira that day. She was exhausted, and all she wanted was a shower and her bed, nothing more.
— — —
“Is this really necessary? I had a health check up at my last doctor’s appointment, I’m fine.”
Namjoon glanced over at Akira, a look of challenge across his face, which she readily submitted to, not wanting to argue with him. He chuckled some, watching her cute little huff as she crossed her arms over her chest. She wasn’t overly dressed. Just a pair of cream colored sweatpants and a white long sleeve crewneck shirt snuggly contoured to her chest and abdomen. Her hair was braided back into two French braids and securely protected by a tan bucket hat. Namjoon, along with the rest of the pack, dressed somewhat similarly, each varying in color or category of clothing.
“I’m just now realizing I don’t have anything. My birth certificate, my social security card, records—nothing.” Feeling Akira slightly panic, Namjoon grabbed Akira’s thigh, the firm squeeze re-centering her focus. She looked up at him, her doe-like eyes melting his heart once more,
“I know doctor’s offices are touchy, but this isn’t a follow up from when you had surgery. This is more of a yearly thing. Everyone in the pack gets a check up.” Namjoon assures.
“Everyone in the pack doesn’t have to lay back with their feet in stirrups.” Akira throws a glare Namjoon’s way, which sends him throwing up his hands in defeat.
“Princess,” Hoseok chimed in, sitting opposite Akira on her right, instead of on her left, like Namjoon, “you wanted this relationship to go further, intimately. We just wanna make sure everything is safe and okay to proceed. And as far as your personal things, they’re in a safe in Namjoon’s office. Your grandmother already took care of that.”
Akira frowned somewhat, “I would feel better if all of you got tested too.” They each looked at her, some not surprised by her statement, others just simply tuning into the conversation’s turn of topic, “What? Y’all had sex, I didn’t, I don’t know what y’all done.” Akira doubled down her statement, making the others look at each other, “If we’re taking it there, I wanna know. I don’t want any surprises and I definitely don’t want any of us getting sick.”
“You have a point, and we already knew you’d want that precaution. Getting tested is part of our yearly check up.” Jin replied coolly, flipping through a magazine he found in the lounge area. Jimin watches Akira bite her bottom lip nervously as she looks down at her nails, picking at the nail beds. His brown drop in a furrow,
“That’s not what you’re worried about though, is it love?” Akira glances over at him, caught in the act, “What’s really bothering you?”
Each of the men popped their heads around, looking over at Akira with concern. She sighed quietly, leaning back in her chair before responding, “I just don’t want another doctor looking at my scars…I don’t want another one to ask me questions about my medical records and why I had all these surgeries and why I don’t have a mating bite and this, that, and the third. It’s humiliating..” Akira mumbled the last part, but she’s sure they heard her. Hoseok grabbed her hand, tearing it away from destroying the other. He leaned in close, rubbing his cheek against the top of her head, scenting her with his calming, sweet gingery lemon scent.
“Hopefully, this will be the last doctor you’ll have to see for a while. We checked her out, she’s a great doctor, for werewolves and humans. And we let her know the extent of your injuries ahead of time.” Akira pulled back some, staring over at Hoseok, “If there’s a question you don’t want answered, she won’t ask, Princess. You don’t have to be embarrassed.”
“What if she tells me something I don’t wanna hear?” Akira’s nerves were bouncing all through the atmosphere. Namjoon grabbed her other hand, squeezing it firmly but gently, trying to ease her mind,
“Then as a pack, we’ll deal with it together.”
— — —
“Ok Ms. Kim, you can put your clothes back on while I head to the lab to drop off these cell samples. We’ll talk a little more in just a bit.” Akira watched as the doctor and her nurse walked out of the exam room. Dr. Regina Freeman, a board certified gynecologist and general practitioner, spent the better half of 15 minutes checking Akira for abnormal cell growth, cysts, and whatnot. What was probably a routine procedure for her, was the most uncomfortable experience for Akira. Sniffling, Akira winced as she slowly got down from the exam bed and put her clothes back on. The women both understood that this was her first actual exam—not having this procedure done by the time of her first period was odd to the doctor at first, but given the circumstances explained to her beforehand, she wasn’t all that surprised.
Akira grabbed her phone from her sweatpants once she was fully clothed. She sent a message in the pack's group chat, hoping one of them would answer:
“Is anyone done with their appointment? I kinda don’t wanna be alone with mine.”
Instantly, 7 message bubbles appeared out of sheer eagerness, but only one was able to get through first:
KookieBear:
“Mines is finished, I can head to your room rn.”
Akira replied quickly, waiting for Jungkook to reach her room. She looked around the room, diagrams of different anatomies plastered various walls; kitschy generic positivity posters displayed opposite of them. It looked like any other exam room you might see on TV, even with the tongue depressors and cotton balls cutely and neatly displayed in clean, sterile glass jars. A soft knock distracted Akira from her roaming, “Come in.”
Jungkook peeked his head in before fully entering the room. He immediately walked over to her, standing by her side, “Are you alright?”
Akira nodded, “Yeah. I just hate being alone here, I hate being alone in doctor’s offices and hospitals.” Akira snuggly wrapped her arms around Jungkook’s torso as he pulled her in for a hug, unabashedly rubbing his scent all over her. He knew the creamy vanilla scent would instantly soothe her. “How are the guys?”
“They’re fine, they’re gonna be finishing up soon. Do you know anything yet from Dr. Freeman?” He questioned back. Akira shook her head ‘no’, citing that she and the nurse just left the room minutes ago. Jungkook moved to stand in front of Akira, trapping his waist between her thick thighs. Akira looked up at him, feeling the warmth radiate off his body. He moved a hand, cutely running his thumb across her jaw and cheek, “It’ll be over soon, we promise.”
“I know.” Akira replied quietly, the morning lull catching up to her as she grew tired. “Right now though, I just feel so tired.” Akira dropped her head onto Jungkook’s chest. The young Alpha laughed softly, rubbing his fingers into the back of her neck, ‘For a human, she sure does have a lot of Omegan qualities.’ He thinks quietly to himself as he scents her like crazy. The door shot opened though, breaking their inner peace,
“Jungkook.” Namjoon warned, watching his younger pack mate over power Akira’s natural scent. If it wasn’t for the fact that he could practically smell Jungkook through the whole office, he would never sense Akira close by. For a young Alpha, Jungkook had great control of his basic instincts. Yet when it comes to Akira, Jungkook was suddenly territorial. In subtle ways, he made it known Akira was his, even uncharacteristically challenging his Alpha, Namjoon, without realizing it. If Namjoon was a lesser Alpha, he would’ve taken Jungkook’s heavy scenting as a threat, but Namjoon understands what it’s like to have an Omega of his own. He understands that for Jungkook, the need to care for Akira just comes naturally. “You’re getting her scent high, you know that right?”
“Huh?” Jungkook frowned, pulling back to stare at Akira who sleepily searched for his scent, even whining a little. The sound was barely noticeable, but they heard it. Jungkook held her plump face in between her hands, “Shit, I didn’t think humans could get scent high.” His eyes searched her hazy ones, “Akira? Baby, are you ok?”
“Mm.” Akira’s response was practically mute as she slightly turned her face into his palm, nuzzling, barely a graze, “Yes, but hug me, you’re warm.” She pleaded softly, unaware of the effect she had over the two Alphas.
“Beautiful, you’re getting high off his scent, he can’t hug you right now.” Namjoon regrettably said, making Akira whine a little louder. Their wolves perked at the sound, but Namjoon quieted them all, “I promise, when we get home, you can cuddle him all you want.” Namjoon side-eyed Jungkook, silently scolding him for not controlling his scent.
“Sorry.” Jungkook frowned, “She smelled stressed, I didn’t know what else to do.”
“I’m glad you were able to calm her down, just be mindful next time.” Namjoon gingerly sat in a chair away from the exam table, “We’re not home where she’s protected. Having her pliable like this is dangerous, for her and for us.” He warned, making Jungkook understand the gravity of his actions. Just then the doctor walked in, her nurse not far behind her. Both Namjoon and Jungkook stood rod straight; a scene practically made in front of her as Akira looked out of it while Jungkook looked guilty and Namjoon looked bashfully ashamed. She simply closed the door behind her and asked that everyone be seated. Jungkook hurriedly sat next to Namjoon, aware that his presence near Akira still made her loopy.
“I see your Alpha scented you. I understand hospitals and clinics are stressful for Omegas, even human-presenting ones.” Dr. Freeman assured, a light pen shining dull into Akira’s eyes.
“Wait, so she is an Omega??” Namjoon’s posture straightened; ears perking at the news.
“Yes, according to her bloodwork, she has Omegan wolf DNA. It’s recessive, which, unfortunately won’t show up in results as her dominant gene. If she hasn’t shifted by now, she may never shift.” Akira looked down at her hands, eyes blurring over with tears. A tiny sniffle filled the room, making Namjoon rise from his seat immediately. Without hesitation, his arms wrapped around her, letting Akira fall apart. The doctor gave them a sad look, one she was used to giving over the years, “I know it seems like terrible news, but it’s not uncommon for some wolves to have a recessive sub-gene. And the likelihood of her shifting can still be a possibility, but it’s very rare. You’ll need to be extra careful with her.”
“So, she’s human basically, even though she is a shewolf?” Namjoon wanted confirmation.
“In a sense, yes. I was curious when you told me she was able to smell your scent and sense shifts in the environment, as well as respond to an Alpha Command—a natural instinct for Omegas. After the blood test showed the rare genetic markers for the recessive lycan mutation, I realized that while it is not uncommon for recessed sub-gene Omegas to have a trait from their family, it is very rare to have more than one. I would like to try further tests, but for now, she’s doing better than her last visit with her previous doctor.”
“No more tests.” Akira whined, burying her face into Namjoon’s chest, still scent high from Jungkook. Namjoon rubbed her back, shaking his head.
“We understand Dr. Freeman, we will schedule whatever tests that’s needed to make sure Akira is okay.” Namjoon instantly put his foot down, making Akira whimper. The sound was as close enough to a chirp as one could get, making both Jungkook and Namjoon stand at attention. Dr. Freeman took notice,
“That’s another thing,” Dr. Freeman sighed, crossing her hands over her lap, “without proper training of what Omegas do, she’s bound to make mistakes. You have to explain it to her, but basically try to avoid sending her into Omegaspace as much as possible. Getting lost in her head, especially when her wolf is absent, is dangerous. While I don’t recommend ignoring her calls, any chirps that do happen while she’s not presently upset will occur, so try to explain to her that she’s not in any danger. And lastly, when the time comes, please explain presenting to her Alpha to her. She won’t realize she’s doing it, and that’ll be a very touchy subject for her, considering she’s a virgin.” Dr. Freeman watched as both men’s faces slowly crawled to a flushed crimson color. Namjoon let out a cough, avoiding as much eye contact as possible,
“I don’t—do you think she’s ready for that?” He questioned softly.
“That’ll be up for Akira to decide.” The doctor shrugged, “If you’re asking emotionally speaking. Physically, she is still a wolf, she can take a knot if that’s what you’re referring to. Although at this stage, without knowing if her body can or cannot produce her wolf, I think it’s best if she went on a birth control designed for Omegas. It’s the safest option at this time for her.”
“I think so too.” Namjoon sighed, cradling Akira’s face in his hands. He rubbed his thumbs across her cheeks, watching as her head lulled while tears still kissed her waterline, making her eyes glossy. By the end of the appointment, Jungkook had to carry Akira out just because he accidentally sent her into Omegaspace. Dr. Freeman explained to them an easy way to coax her out of it, but by the time they entered their cars and with the drive home, Akira slept the whole way.
— — —
*Author’s Note:
This chapter was originally longer than this, but I didn’t want ya’ll waiting any longer than ya’ll already have, especially since I already threw out a teaser (again, thank you for being so patient with me while I’m still processing everything). This chapter took a completely different turn than before; it was just harder to write for some reason.
I am going to plan on trying updating more consistently; I can’t promise a certain day or time, as I’m just writing these chapters as I go, but I will try to not drag out these updates (normally I’m more organized than this, but it had been a year since I’ve written anything).
For these next few chapters, I plan on making them more intense, especially with different antagonists—it won’t solely be family related—and it definitely will be more mature in terms of intimacy between Akira and Bangtan (idk why I’m trying to be professional-sounding about this, I just feel like I need to watch what I say for some reason lol). Also do you prefer the long chapters? I’ve been told it can be too much sometimes, so I can condense it if necessary.
A/N: This is very self indulgent for me. I like a man who eats well.
🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜🍜
“I like the way you eat.”
He nearly choked on the ramen you made him.
“Suddenly?”
“Yeah. It’s cute.”
He leans his head down and gives a shy smile.
“How?”
You shrug.
“I don’t know. You take these like big, small bites that make your cheeks look bigger. Your little stupid earrings jingle along with your jaw. You get concentrated like you’re thinking hard.”
None of this sounds like a compliment to him.
“It’s cute. Your lips get small and pouty like a doll. They get this glossy pinkish plump. Kinda looks like a bunny’s tongue.”
He feels himself getting embarrassed.
“You look like you enjoy every bite you take. You look like you eat well and I like it.”
Summary: You and JK have been friends for a few months. You first ran into each other at your boxing gym and had become fast friends. At least you are trying to keep those boundaries, as you’ve dubbed Jungkook as off limits because of his idol status. But does Jungkook know he’s off limits?
Idol! Jungkook X BlackfemReader(Plus sized reader)
Warnings: Smut(filthy). Mutual Pinning. Reader is oblivious of JK’s feelings at first. JK is obsessed with Reader including her body. JK is a munch(cunnalingus). Sparring.(Manhandling, wrestling, Judo). Dryhumpping. Choking(HAHAHAH). Rough Sex. Dirty Talk. Reader has a potty mouth, but so does JK. JK is a little shit as is reader. Gym Sex. Semi-Public Sex. Dom JK. Sub reader (Likes to put up a fight though). Bratty Reader. Reader gives off independent black woman vibes. Reader gets frustrated and overwhelmed does cry a bit. Slight Noona Kink(if you squint). Slight Angst. Language barrier is there but vibes. (Will add as the story progresses.)
*Glossary for Korean can be found at end of chapter.*
With a sigh you wrapped your coat tighter around yourself and continued your trek home.
Today hadn’t gone that great for you and every single thing that could have gone wrong, did. It first started off with you waking up to your charger no longer working so your phone only had half of its charge. Now this wouldn’t have been a big deal normally, but today was one of your long days so your phone was a necessity.
Secondly you had to take a cold shower, as the boiler in your apartment unit decided to go out. With the weather getting colder you started turning off your heating system a bit more to save on the utilities bill. Turns out doing that in the dead of winter in Seoul wasn’t the best idea, as the damn things pipes had frozen.
Thirdly while at work the town hall meeting quickly turned into a crisis meeting when the CFO reported that the social media team posted about a future project that was still in its last stages of contract review with a partnered client.
Absolutely nobody was supposed to know about it yet, let alone the public. The post had immediately been deleted on the company website, but by that time the damage was already done. And even though the mistake hadn’t been done by your team, everyone felt the consequences of that fuck up. As all management was now required to sign off on every little thing that needed to be submitted.
With everyone in crisis mode the only break for the day had been a working lunch and you only had time to stuff your face with what you could get from the cafeteria. You couldn’t even run to the store to grab yourself another charger like you had originally planned that morning. You of course had tried borrowing a charger from your coworker but you were that lone iPhone user in a sea of Samsungs.
During your sorry excuse of a lunch you had received an email from your landlord stating that your boiler needed to be replaced, but it wouldn’t happen until Tuesday. Today was Friday, meaning you would be without hot water for 4 days.
However the final tally that had officially turned this day from a little bad to ALL bad was finding out you would have to stay later at work than you originally planned. You were going to work overtime today so you had already come to terms with that. But with the newest demands of the management team you had to stay back and wait to approve every project and procedures for submission before Monday. You couldn’t even take work home as with the recent leak all remote activity was temporarily suspended.
By the time you left the office you were only able to catch one of the two buses you needed to take home. Korea’s public transport stopped running at 1am. Sure you could have called a cab home, however with your phone being dead you had to walk the last 3km home.
But not before stopping at the convenience store to grab another charger. Or two. You will not be caught slipping again.
Now with everything that happened today this walk home should have helped to clear your mind. And normally it would have. But it only made you realize that you wouldn’t be able to relax in a hot shower when you got home. In fact you probably should figure out where you would be staying instead because there was absolutely no way you were going to survive the weekend and then some with no running hot water.
When you finally entered your apartment you were shocked to find that it was ice cold. “What the hell?”
Slipping off your shoes, you step a few feet into your entryway. Frowning you slowly began to realize that your floor heating system wasn’t on. Grabbing your slippers from the shoe rack you dropped them to the floor and quickly shuffled them on.
Making your way to the bedroom you dropped your things onto and over the back of the couch. Hitting the light switch you peered at your thermostat in confusion. Clicking on one of the up arrows you watched as the thing just continues to flash numbers at you. Something that happened this morning when you realized your hot water wasn’t working.
And with that it was as if a light bulb went off in your head and you couldn’t help but throw your head back in defeat. The boiler controlled all of the hot water, meaning the heating system for your floors. Your apartment not only didn’t have running hot water but also no heat. No heat in the middle of freaking winter.
You lean against your wall and groan, “Are you fucking kidding me right now?”
Your vision began to blur as frustrated tears prick at the corner of your eyes. Closing them you inhaled deeply refusing to allow them to fall. Everything was just a lot right now, but you weren’t going to let this break you. “It’s fine…it’s fine.”
You hold your breath for a few seconds before slowly exhaling. You repeat this step a few times until you can feel your heart rate slow and the overwhelming feeling dissipates. Sniffling you pushed yourself away from the wall and wiped your eyes dry.
“Seriously fuck today.” You chuckle mirthlessly as you shrug off your jacket, dragging your feet to your closet you proceed to come up with a game plan. As you got changed into your lounge wear you tried to ignore the fact you hadn’ showered yet, but you refused to lazy around in your work clothes. You could mentally hear your mother fussing about how outside clothes don’t go on the bed.
While changing you made a mental checklist of things you needed to do. ‘First charge your phone, then figure out a place to stay for the next few days.’
Your stomach gave a violent rumble as you walked back into your living room. “Okay phone, food THEN figure out the living situation.”
——
About twenty minutes later you find yourself wrapped in your coziest throw blanket finishing off a cup of ramyeon while your phone charges on the arm of the couch. The spice of the noodles hits your tongue and you couldn’t help but groan in happiness.
Since moving to Korea you have begun to understand the sudden appeal of instant ramyeon. Yes you had the instant cup noodles back in the states, but nothing really could beat the taste of Korean cup noodles for some reason.
Staring down into the red liquid you narrow your eyes in suspension. “Why are you so addicting…” Though your newfound suspension didn’t stop you from taking another bite.
Your phone buzzed to alert you of a text message, and you glanced at the screen while in mid-slurp. A familiar bunny emoji greeted your eyes and you couldn’t help but smile around the noodles.
“체육관?”
Finishing your bite of noodles you put down the cup on your coffee table and reach for your phone to type back a quick reply.
“What no hi first?”
You watched the ellipsis appear then disappear before a message popped up on your screen.
“안녕. 체육관?”
You rolled your eyes, but stared at the message for a bit. Even though it was late, going to the gym wasn’t a bad idea. You could shower, plus let some of this pent up energy out against a bag.
Typing out a quick reply you run to your bedroom to get yourself together.
“콜 I can be there in 30”
On any normal trip to the gym you’d take the time to choose your fit. But right now your focus is on durability and comfort. A pair of black leggings and compression sports bra. After adjusting the straps you reach for a baggy sweater and throw it on over your head, the ends of the sweater resting at the top of your thighs.
Stepping into your en suite bathroom, you grab a few hair ties and began the routine of securing your coily hair up in a relaxed updo; a hairstyle your older sister liked to call ‘the pineapple’ and you put another hair tie on your wrist. With hair as thick as yours it was always a good idea to carry a spare.
Exiting your bathroom you stop by your closet to collect your pre packed gym tote. Grabbing your gym shoes you stuff them haphazardly into the tote and head to your nightstand to do the same thing with your water bottle.
You can hear your phone going off from its place on your couch. The familiar text tone alerting you of a new message.
Bag secured over your shoulder you grab your phone and charger, making sure to dump the cord into your bag, doing the same thing with your wallet. With your hands semi free you unlock your phone to view your recent message.
“I can pick you up.”
You declined the offer but that instantly had your phone ringing in your hands. Hitting the green circle you also put the device on speaker.
“You live on the opposite side of the gym. It doesn't make sense for you to come get me.”
“But it’s late and the buses aren’t running.” You hear his gruff voice sound over the speakers of your phone and you had to ignore the way your body immediately warmed. This man was off limits and had been the moment he walked into your boxing gym.
———Flashback———
Your lesson was finishing up with your coach and you were working on the bag and was only focused on finishing out the last few reps.
“당신은 일찍 왔습니다, 정국아.”
You heard your coach call out to the person who you assumed just walked into the private gym but you paid them no mind. Instead the moment your last punch landed on the bag you collapsed to the floor mats dramatically in an exhausted heap.
“제가 해냈어요!”
Your coach and the newcomer both chuckled at your display which had you grinning from your place on the floor. You could hear your coach talking more but you didn’t quite understand their conversation. Your Korean was extremely basic, including your grammar. Besides you didn’t really try as it wasn’t right to eavesdrop on others conversation.
Sitting up you crawl your way awkwardly to your gym bag against the wall. Your boxing gloves and arms make the short trip difficult. But you were stubborn as you desperately needed a drink of water. Reaching your hydro flask you popped it open with your teeth and took the most generous pulls from your straw. Groaning when the cool water hits your throat. Room temp water is better after a workout as your body can absorb it easier, but ice cold water turly hits differently .
Putting the bottle down you start working on taking off your gloves. You hear footsteps approaching and you thought it was your coach so you turn to him, but for one it wasn’t your coach. Instead it was someone else entirely. THE Jeon Jungkook of BTS.
“안녕하세요.” You watched as the man shyly bows to you and you quickly scrambled to stand to return his greeting.
“아..안녕하세요.” You awkwardly stuttered back. He proceeded to fire off fluent Korean to you and you were unfortunately only able to catch a few words. You were better than this. Truly you were, but your brain could barely function because of present company. “Umm…I. 저는 한국어를 잘 못해요…죄송합니다.”
The man laughed softly and switched over to English, or at least what English he could speak. However, through the small interaction you were able to find out that Jungkook also took lessons at your gym. He was a bit more advanced than you as he has more training years under his belt. But he still praised you on your form.
———Present———
That meeting had happened well over 8 months ago, your Korean though at the time being basic and his English also the same, you two had become fast friends. Mostly you two hung out at the gym together or you had invited him over for a small LAN party to play Overwatch with some of your friends back home. Of course you never told them exactly who they were playing with. Your friends weren’t that big into Korean music so it was easy for Jungkook to get away with it. But with his demanding schedule it was hard to find time to hang out. Though that didn’t mean you two didn’t talk.
Your text message chain was covered in meme’s and funny TikTok videos you both had sent back to each other over the months. And you two would FaceTime as often as you could. It was an easy friendship. One you had to constantly remind yourself to not take it any further. No matter how attractive, sweet, funny, and annoyingly cute Jungkook was. His status made him off limits. Besides you figured with his job as an idol, he had to constantly deal with people throwing themselves at him. You didn’t want to do that to him, so you made it your mission to never cross that line.
“I’m a big girl Kook, I can take a cab.” You speak into your phone, as you enter the gym’s address into the Kakao taxi app.
“But surge hours.” You heard him whine through the phone. Without even having to see his face you could see the pout and frown combo your friend was no doubt sporting right now. “It is, but it’s already ordered and I’m not wasting money canceling.”
“…완고한.” You didn’t exactly know what he said, even with your Korean having improved but there were still words you didn’t know. But what you did know is that you should take offense to it.
So you did the only thing you could think of. You hung up on him and dropped your device into your bag, and while you were at it you reached for the gym shoes and quickly put them on. Followed by your coat.
Your phone was buzzing violently in your bag to alert you of a phone call, but you ignored it. If he wanted to insult you then he could deal with being ignored for a few moments. You had to head down anyway, your taxi was almost here.
—-
Your coach was actually in the process of leaving for the evening when you arrived. Because the gym was private, sometimes the man allowed some of his VIP clients to use the facilities after hours. By VIP clients what that really stood for was Jungkook. Coach had given him access a while back due to his schedule. And because of your recent friendship with Jungkook, that had meant that by proxy you had access.
“ Y/N아(야) 혼자 운동하기?”
You dropped your gym bag by the wall as you bowed in a greeting to your coach.
“아니요, 정국이 여기 오는 중입니다.”
The older man hummed in acknowledgement at you and advised you to clean up after yourselves when you both were done. You watched the older man wave goodbye to you and you bowed to him wishing him a goodnight.
Now alone you made your way to the sound system and plugged your phone in. You didn’t often get the option to get control of the aux. It was always a first come first serve type of situation. Opening Spotify you hit your workout playlist and the familiar beat of your favorite song comes blasting through the speakers.
With your music now playing you walked over to the side of the gym that had a few yoga mats available for use. Grabbing the thickest one you unroll it and begin a series of warm up stretches. You’re laying down onto your knee for the pigeon pose when Jungkook comes storming in.
“야! 누나!”
You lifted your head and turned it towards the huffing man and stuck your tongue out at him. During your cab ride over you kept ignoring JK’s calls and at first you were just doing it until you got settled into the cab. But the man had started to blow up your phone so you continue to ignore his calls now for the hell of it. All though you were kind enough to text him you were at the gym.
“미안해요.” Though you said it politely, your tone was giving the exact opposite. You watched him roll his eyes and turn around to drop his bag and water bottle next to your things even going as far as discarding his shoes. With his back turned, you allowed yourself a little time to glance over his appearance. He was wearing his typical oversized shirt and sweatpants in his trademark colors. Black. The outfit was simple, but the black seemed to make his tattoo sleeve pop even more.
And his hair, god he started growing out his hair not too long after you two met and it was just so perfect. You wanted to run you fingers through it, hell even braid it and you didn’t even know how to do that. Shaking your head you stare ahead and focus on your warm up. You switch over to the other leg, your back facing him.
With your attention now off of him, you failed to notice the once over he gave your figure. Nor did you see the way his gaze lingered a little longer on your ass.
Jungkook’s fingers flexed a bit as his thoughts began to get away from him. For months he has been dreaming about your ass, your thighs, your chest and don’t even get him started on your belly. He knew you were self conscious about your weight and you had talked with him about it multiple times. And multiple times he had told you there was absolutely nothing wrong, but he did offer to be your gym buddy, help you on your days when you didn’t have the best mindset. And because of this your friendship had grown to what it was today. But Jungkook desperately wanted more and he has every since he first met you.
Your ass had him hypnosis when he had witnessed you crawling across the gym floor. With absolutely no ounce of shame Jungkook had asked his coach about you immediately. The older man might have judged him but Jungkook gave no fucks, especially after he heard the moan you let out when drinking your water. Fuck at that moment he understood why Army always cheered when he would take a water break during concerts. Your plump lips wrapped around the straw made his cock twitch to life in his sweatpants. Jungkook was already so down bad that the possible language barrier between the two of you didn’t even occur to him until after you both started talking.
“So how was your day?” Your voice calling out to him sounded slightly strained as you switched into deep lunges. He was lucky the music was loud because the noise that fell from his lips sounded feral. That pose made your ass look straight up appetizing. Clearing his throat Jungkook turned his back to you when he noticed you started looking over and occupied himself with his hand wraps.
“Busy, had a few schedules, but I have the next couple of days off. How was yours?”
He heard your huff of frustration and he glanced over his shoulder. You looked peeved. Actually now that he was looking at you, he could see how tense you truly were.
You moved into a butterfly pose and started bouncing your knees against the mat. “It fucking sucked. I had to get a new charger because my old one quit working in the middle of the night. Plus my boiler broke, also work was overwhelmingly stupid. I had to stay late and unfortunately I missed my last bus home. I had to walk the last couple of kilometers.” In the middle of your rant you had abandoned the stretch and had begun listing off your grievances by counting on your stiletto manicured fingers.
Jungkook’s brow furrowed more and more as you ranted off to him about your day. You were speaking extremely fast so he was hyperfocusing on the way your glossed lips moved making sure he was picking up every word. Since meeting you his English has improved rapidly. So much so that even Namjoon noticed. But his brain still needed to work overtime to translate your words, so his hands stilled, pausing in his hand wrapping, the purple wraps hanging awkwardly between his fingers.
“집에 걸어갔어요? 온돌이 고장났습니다? Wait….You can’t stay at home with your heat not working 누나.”
You nod your head in agreement with him.”I know, I’m going to look at a hotel to stay in tomorrow. It’ll be fixed on Tuesday.”
”Stay with me.” He was not going to let you go back home to a cold apartment. It was starting to snow when he had pulled up to the building earlier. He watched as you blinked owlishly at him for his statement, your head tilting in confusion in a way he found extremely cute. But he needed you to understand that he was serious.
“I’m serious. Stay with me until your 온돌 is fixed.”
You waved your hands back and forth in front of you and shook your head. “That's sweet of you, but no, it's okay I can stay at a hotel.”
Jungkook shook the purple wraps off his hand and let the fabric fall to the floor by his bag before making his way over to your form. “If you insist on staying in a hotel, fine. But at least come back to mine for the night.”
Your brows shot up in surprise at his sudden approach. You really did find it sweet that he was offering his own home for your benefit. But staying the night with Jungkook even if it was for platonic reasons felt like it was crossing a line. You smiled gently at the man as you declined once again.
“Y/N, just for tonight. It was snowing when I got here and you live on the 5 floor. There is no way you would be comfortable at home tonight.” As if to prove he was serious Jungkook had kneeled down to your level, his wide brown eyes staring deeply into yours.
Your vision jumped back and forth between his eyes before looking away to think. Okay so he had a point. Your plan had been to stay home for tonight and find a hotel to check into the following morning. When you left your apartment the thermostat had shown 12 degrees Celsius. Now with it snowing you could only imagine what the temperature would read.
You cross your arms over your chest and begin to nibble your bottom lip as you got lost in thought. Would it really be okay for you to accept his offer? You’ve never been to his house before, sure he’s been to yours plenty of times, but it was easier to sneak him into your apartment. Jungkook had literal people stalked outside his home 24/7 always hoping to catch a look of the idol. “I..don’t kn-“
”I won’t accept no for an answer Y/N” Jungkook steels his gaze when your eyes shift back to him at his declarations. It didn’t make sense for you to go back home. He had two guest rooms available. He would truthfully prefer you sleeping in his own bed, snuggled up close, but that could come later. He watched as one of your eyebrows ticked upward and an expression he dubbed stubborn defiants took over.
Dropping down fully to the floor Jungkook crossed his legs and settled in for the long haul. Once you had that look on your face it was always hard for him to change your mind. Sometimes he would just give up and let you have your way, but he refused to do that this time. It’s for your own good and his peace of mind.
“I’ll be fine Jungkook, it's for one night. Hell it's like literally just a few hours at this point. I won’t freeze to death.” Though you said this, a miniscule part of your brain did wonder if it was actually possible.
“Aren’t you anemic? You’ve been complaining about how cold you’ve been feeling lately.”
Your eyes shifted to the floor with his statement. So yes you did get cold super easily. You had never been the type of person to sleep with socks on, but more nights you found yourself doing exactly that. In fact your fuzzy sock collection had grown quite quickly over the last couple of months, but you felt that was largely due to the man right in front of you.
“I can’t ask you to d-“
”You aren’t asking, I’m offering.” Jungkook watched as you bite your lower lip and your brows scrunch closer together. He could see your mind physically searching for a way to decline his offer. You might have hung up the phone when he had called you stubborn earlier, but you really were. He admired how fiercely independent you were, but he wanted you to also understand you don’t have to be with him around.
“Y/N, I have a spare bedroom you can stay in for the night. You can sleep in a warm bed and I’ll even make breakfast. I make an amazing egg sandwich.”
You rolled your eyes at him, but the corner of your lips did tug upward into a small smile. You were tempted to say yes, but you still were worried. “ You won’t get into trouble for me spending the night?”
You watched as Jungkook’s eyes dip down your frame and back up to your eyes. And your body warms uncontrollably at the gesture. “누나 I’ve had people crash at mine before.”
You sigh a bit in frustration because that’s not exactly what you meant. Yes you are sure he has had people over, but what about women? You didn’t want him to get into trouble with his company over this. A photo leaking of a woman sneaking into his home in the middle of the night would be a horrible scandal. No matter how innocent it is. “Okay but have you ever had a woman do it? I don’t want this to get you into ‘any’ kind of trouble.”
It was Jungkook’s turn to arch his eyebrow, he watched as you stared at him in genuine concern. He could tell now that what you were really worried about was the possible scandal this could bring, and yes there was a chance you could be caught coming home with him. But he didn’t care about all of that. He was a grown man and he wasn’t going to stop or be afraid to live his own life because of that.
Staring at you for a little longer something else started to occur to him, how innocent did you think he was to not having had a woman stay at his place before. Grinning, he placed his hands behind him and leaned back onto his palms, his eyes never leaving yours.
“You wouldn’t be the first woman to spend the night with me Y/N.” He said as he cocks his head to the side chuckling softly.
You scoff and look away as the warm feeling from before moved to two places. Your face then down to your lower belly. You know he didn’t mean it the way he said it, but you couldn’t help the way your mind wandered. The fantasies you’ve buried deep into the back of your head started coming to the surface.
You feel a nudge against your knee and look down to watch Jungkook’s foot return to the floor. Without hesitation you reach forward and push the man back by his shoulders. “Eww don’t touch me with your feet!”
Jungkook bursts into a giggling mess as he falls back to the floor in a heap. You aggressively started rubbing the back of your hand over where his toe sock covered foot touched. ”I’m definitely going home after that stunt.”
You started to stand but jungkook was faster. Your wrist was within his hand in seconds and he gently pulled you back down to your seated position. At least that had been the plan until gravity set it. Your had corrected your balance trying not to fall into Jungkook, but the man didn’t want you falling to the floor.
You landed awkwardly across his lap. His thighs digging slightly into your stomach. You feel one of his hands on your shoulder and the other on your waist stabilizing you. “I’m sorry 누나.”
Jungkook was in absolute heaven. You were laid across his lap in such a way that your ass was almost directly in his face. He had caught you in a way that he could feel exactly how soft and warm your body was against his own and loved it. But he could only hold you against him for so long.
As you began to sit up you felt Jungkook’s hand move from your waist to the other side of your hip in assistance. His hold firm and strong, your heart couldn’t help but flutter. You plop down next to him and you watch as he looks you over clearly checking for injuries. “I’m fine Kook, I practically crushed you. I should be the one saying sorry. Are you okay?”
Jungkook reached over and flicked your forehead. “You could never 누나.”
You hiss in pain and lean away from him rubbing your forehead. Glaring at him past you hands. “Ow, what as that for?”
Jungkook just gives you a look. One that you clearly understand. No negative remarks towards yourself were allowed. Something you both had talked about multiple times.
You watch as Jungkook stands up and stretch his hands high above his head. It took all of your willpower not to drop your eyes to his crotch. “You’ve been practicing Judo with 선생님?”
You continue to pout as your rub your forehead still a little miffed and mumbled a soft yes.
“Then let's spar in the ring. You win, I’ll drive you back home. I win, you stay with me tonight. “ What he didn’t tell you was that if your place did turn out to be too cold he was going to drag you over to his anyway.
You slowly come to your feet next to him, frowning at him deeply. “How is that fair? You are literally a black belt.”
Jungkook smiled cheekily at your comment. And leaned a little into your space. “Scared?”
You rolled your eyes and placed your hand on his cheek pushing his head away from you, “No, I’m being realistic.”
With the momentum of your push he dramatically falls into the direction of the elevated ring tucked into the corner of the gym.
You watch from your place next to your yoga mat as Jungkook slides into the ring and stands up only to lean down on to the black boxing ring ropes, his full weight bouncing lazily on them. “If you can pin me once, you win. But if I can pin you 7 times. I win?”
You walk towards him and place your hands on your hips, your neck tilted back as you look up to him. “I only have to pin you once?”
Jungkook bobs his head up and down in confirmation. You had only been practicing Judo for the last month or so. But your coach had said you did show great promise for it. Which didn’t surprise you in the least. What he didn’t know is that you and your siblings pretended that your living room was a wrestlemania arena when you were growing up. Stone Cold Steve Austin was your literal childhood hero.
“Fine.” You agreed to his terms and started toeing off your shoes. Then your socks as an afterthought. Honestly the deal was a good one. You didn’t really have faith in abilities but 1 out of 7 were good odds.
To be continued…
NEXT
Glossary:
체육관: Gym—안녕. 체육관: Hello(informal). Gym—콜: Deal(ex:You have a deal.)—당신은 일찍 왔습니다, 정국아: You came early, Jungkook—제가 해냈어요: I did it—안녕하세요: Hello(Formal)—저는 한국어를 잘 못해요…죄송합니다:I am not good at Korean, I’m sorry—…완고한: Stubborn—Y/N아(야) 혼자 운동하기: Y/N (ending depends if your names ends in vowel or a constant), working out alone—아니요, 정국이 여기 오는 중입니다: No, Jungkook is on his way here—야! 누나: Hey(informal) Older sister(for male)—미안해요: Sorry(formal)—집에 걸어갔어요? 온돌이 고장났습니다?: Did you walk home? Is the ondol(Korean thermostat) broken—선생님: Teacher.
Please let me know if this format is clear enough to understand.
word count 4,408k, established relationship, daddykink,smut with backstory, needywife, unprotected sex, fertility issues, one-shot*
18+ only!!
Paring : idol!husband!Namjoon x army!Wife!Reader.
Warnings: 18+only content, unprotected sex, fertility issues, drinking and cussing.
~Preview: Namjoon had been working everyday for the past 2 weeks, hardly coming home for dinner let alone a shower or even a phone call. You missed him, badly in all the ways a person could miss someone.You decided to be a brat and text your husband not so safe things for work.
1st) a text " I can't wait to taste you" then a picture of you on the couch on your knees, ass showing, mouth open, tongue out. Teasing him with your mouth and plump ass should get him home soon you hoped.
2mins later your phone buzzes.~
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
Namjoon had been working everyday for the past 2 weeks, hardly coming home for dinner let alone a shower or even a phone call. You missed him, badly in all the ways a person could miss someone.
You missed his voice, the way his eyes light up when you spoke to him or if he had an interesting fact to share. You missed his smell, of a lazy sunday afternoon, the way his hands fit perfectly in yours and how his arms held you in your sleep. You missed hearing his heartbeat next to you and even his snores that kept you awake.
You knew it was a crazy time with the comeback just days away but you really needed him, especially before things got even busier.
So after you sent many unread text messages bugging him to come home. A Snapchat from Hobi showing the guys goofing off in the practice room left you annoyed and needy as you watched it bounce freely in his gray sweats. You decided to be a brat and text your husband not so safe things for work.
1st) a text " I can't wait to taste you" then a picture of you on the couch on your knees, mouth open, tongue out. Teasing him with your mouth should get him home soon you hoped.
2mins later your phone buzzes. [Hubby] flashes across the screen, he's calling and you laugh as you answer the call.
"Hey honey~" you answer sweetly.
"What are you doing??? Im trying to focus and now I have an issue and the boys are laughing at me" Namjoon's exasperation comes through the line and you can hear the others laughing in the background.
" just bored and missing you.....badly, babe" you coo while chuckling softly in response.
" you haven't been home in a few days and I miss you... every part of you" you whine while a pout crosses your face.
" I know, I'm sorry baby. I'll be home tonight I promise, we're almost done with rehearsals" Namjoon promises, you can hear his pleading and guilty tone. You've heard it before so you know exactly what his face looks like. Eyebrows knitting together, eyes soft and a frown on his plump lips. He feels guilty knowing he hasn't paid much attention to you since the announcement of the tour's kick off date.
You're not mad, you can never be made at him. You love what he does, how his music moves, inspires and protects people. It's how you two met.
You were having the worst day of your life. Your boyfriend of 3 years suddenly broke up with you, telling you that he didn't want a long term relationship that ends in nothing but disappointment and sex with rules.You didn't want to have sex till marriage but did agree to early sex if you were engaged, wore condoms and if he got tested for stds before. Well your ex said no to it all and left, while mentioning that he had been cheating on you for the last year because you're a prude.
Once he had left you cried of course, you did love him even if he was a dick to you most of the time.
Grabbing a bottle of wine you climbed out of your apartment window and onto the roof where you could cry, drink and listen to your favorite band in peace without being judged.
"I'm so sorry but it's fake love, fake love, fake love" Jin's voice sang through your headphones and you sang along too not caring if anyone heard you.
For the next few hours you stayed like that, laying on the cold hard cement roof top watching the sun set and the stars come out to shine. Drinking almost the whole bottle and singing your favorite songs.
By the time the bottle was empty, you had your eyes closed singing along to RM's " lonely " with every fiber of your being not noticing that you were no longer alone on the roof.
2 other people had joined your little drinking party although they sat at the other end of the complex on chairs, they could still hear you sing.
Hearing your voice, the taller of the two stood abruptly while the smaller one choked on his drink coughing hard.
" Are you okay Hoba?" Namjoon asked with concern spreading across his face.
Regaining control over his lungs, Hoseok stood and pointed to where your voice was coming from.
"I think we should go visit that army, she sounds sad" Hoseok said while nodding in your direction.
"I don't know man, maybe we should just leave her be, it might freak her out" Namjoon said with worry. Although he couldn't help the curious look in his eyes as he looked in your direction.
"Fine stay here, it's not like she's singing my songs~" Hoseok teased while walking slowly in your direction.
Wait, she might speak English and you have trouble with that!" Namjoon hollered while speed walking to catch up with his hyeong.
You closed your eyes and begged for it all to be a dream, a nightmare that would go away and you'd be back home with your family in the states , not here laying on top of your apartment complex drinking wine and crying over an idiot who convinced you to move to Seoul, South Korea because why not it'll be fun! Besides your crappy relationship, living in Seoul has been a dream come true. It's wonderful and beautiful, interesting and chaotic but you do love it. It was a place where your soul felt at peace. Odd to say but you never really felt at home in Kansas. Despite never being further than the west side of the Colorado River in Arizona as a teen. Moving to Korea practically destroyed any relationships you had with your family especially since none of them liked your now ex-boyfriend.
Sighing, you move to sit up and hug your knees to your chest, not noticing that Namjoon and Hoseok are about to sit beside you.
Konk!
" ouuuch shiit" you curse as your head collides with another person's forehead and your hands fly to your head, rubbing the new sore.
"Ah fuck!" A startled voice escapes the person in front of you while you hear another one laughing hard in the background.
Rubbing your forehead, you look up and see the most beautiful brown eyes staring down at you while their hand reaches out to help you to your feet.
Too shocked to move, your brain is processing who you just bonked heads with.
"Are you okay??" The man asks, while reaching out to you.
You take his hand and he gently lifts you to your feet.
" ye-yeah im okay, although I think I might be dead . Are-are you okay?" You stammer out while awkwardly looking at the man in front of you, eyes brows tilted up in concern.
"Im okay, why do you think you are dead?" The man asks, with concern and a slight chuckle.
"Well because I just smacked heads with my ultimate bias on the rooftop of my apartment " you state plainly like that explains everything.
The second man continues to laugh at the situation filling the slightly awkward silence with joy that makes you start shyly laughing too.
"Im so sorry for bonking you, I thought I was alone up here" you casually say while gesturing around you vaguely.
" It's okay I shouldn't have been so close to you. Oh we were on the other side of the building and could hear you singing. I'm Namjoon by the way and that's Hoseok" Namjoon mentions while awkwardly fidgeting with his hands on his thighs and then gesturing to the laughing man behind him.
" hello namjoon & hoseok, im y/n "you greet and do a small bow toward the two men.
" so, rough day?" Namjoon asks while pointing to the empty bottle of wine.
"Yeah, you could say that" you say, sadness creeping back into your voice as your eyes dart around not wanting to meet your ultimate bias's soft and caring brown eyes.
You three then sit on the ground, legs dangling over the edge of the roof whilst you talk with them about your day.
They guys listened well, nodding along to your story.
This is where you really fell for him, Kim Namjoon. When you talked with him it was easy, simple and calm. You felt safe, heard, free and understood. Like you could spend your whole life just talking to him and you'd find yourself at peace.
This is how it started. Simple rooftop meet ups between work schedules that made you both feel relaxed.
Namjoon felt it too, the peace you brought him whenever you were next to him or even just hearing your voice calmed his nerves.
He fell for you hard that first day when you literally knocked some sense into him by accident.
You were different from all the other fans he had met. You listened and gave input on his concerns. You didn't just fawn over him but showed that you actually cared for him and the other members.
So one day, he got up the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend and you said yes.
Your romance blossomed into a long standing 6 year relationship before becoming even more long term when he asked you to marry him at the place where you both met.
The best day of your lives was getting to say I do and begin your own adventure together. It was hard of course, with his type of work leaving him away from you weeks at a time. But you had your own busy schedule too. As head curator of the Seoul museum of history you spent days working on specific exhibits of Korean history and culture, oftentimes forgetting to go home until well past midnight. Coming home and finding Namjoon in 1 of 2 places, working in his at home studio or on his favorite Dubai couch reading one of his many tbr's.
You've now been married for 4 years and many friends, family and fans have been bugging you both on when you'd have a kid. Namjoon would be a wonderful father and many have said you'd be a great mom. You've both talked a lot about it and have agreed that you want kids but are also okay with not having any if that's what the universe decides. It's not like you haven't been trying. For goodness sake, you have sex all the time, so much so that you find it hard to walk some days and Joon's knees are starting to hurt.
You tried many times but it only ended in heartbreak when the pregnancy test showed 1 line( not pregnant) over and over again. You both have taken a test and nothing is wrong with either of you so why won't it take.
After failed attempt # who the fuck knows anymore happens and you're hating yourself in the bathroom again, Namjoon walks in and kneels down in front of you. Resting his hands on your knees.
" Baby it's okay, we always said if it happens then it happens. Please stop beating yourself up. I love you, all of you and I don"t need a mini you to remind me of that. " Joon takes your hands in his and kisses them softly. Then he moves to bring you into a hug, holding you to him like you are the most fragile thing in the world.
" I know but it still hurts. I feel like I've failed as a woman, the only thing my body is designed to do and it wont". You sob into his arms soaking his shirt.
"I know honey, I'm sorry" Namjoon isn't quite sure how to comfort you. He doesn't understand why he can't get you pregnant, something he very much does want to see and knows you want it too.
"Let's just take a break okay, you've got that big exhibit to fundraise for and I've got comeback season to prepare for." Namjoon reminds you of the immense stress you're both under while rubbing small soothing circles on your back.
"Okay" you sniffle.
And that was 3 weeks ago,the last time you two had sex was 4 weeks ago when you were trying to get pregnant.
So now that you're done with your exhibit, a bit stress free but annoyed that you haven't seen your husband in a while, you decided to be a brat and send him spicy messages and pictures hoping it'll make him come home faster.
[ I want you to hold me down and use me as your own personal stress relief toy 😌 🤤]~wifey
[🥵]~hubby
[Done, on my way home, love you] ~hubby
Smirking you laugh into the empty house waiting eagerly for your husband to arrive while laying stomach down onto the couch and kicking your legs in excitement.
Namjoon practically speeds home with how hard his foot is pressing on gas, thankful that the boys and you convinced him to finally get his license and a car so he could get home to his needy wife fast. Walking into the house, Y/n springs to her feet wrapping her arms around his neck and bringing him in for a deep lustful kiss. Namjoon moans into the kiss as his arms wrap around y/n plump waist, his hands leading just below her thick round ass where he can gently grip her nearly bear cheeks. Her thin blue panties delicately covering her ass.
" Baby, wait I'm gross. I need to shower first" Namjoon whines breaking the kiss and trying to step back from you. "
I don't care, we've had post practice sex before." Y/n states not caring in the slightest that her husband is kinda stinky.
Namjoon gives her a credulous look before sighing almost admitting defeat because damn does she look delicious and stunning standing there in his favorite white t-shirt, no bra evident by the way her plump breasts bounce as she moves from side to side. Her thick thighs and tiny feet on full display for him as she's only wearing his favorite blue panties to hid her cunt and her ass, the longer his eyes drag over her, the wetter y/n's cunt becomes as she can feel his beautiful brown eyes gazing up and down her full curvy figure. She could see how much just her standing there on her tip toes trying to kiss him was driving him insane with each small bounce, her boobs jiggled making his cock grow harder by the second.
" ooookaay, I guess you can go shower but don't take too long..... and don't do anything without me" y/n seductively says as she kisses Namjoon's cheek and turns back around to the living room.
That was the fastest shower Namjoon had ever taken in his life. His thick cock was already begging for release but he wanted to save it for his bratty, teasing and succubus wife's greedy cunt. Getting out he opted for no shirt, exposing his toned abs,shoulders and arms to drive y/n more crazy for him. Just his favorite sweatpants and no undies was perfect after a grueling day at work preparing for the comeback.
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
You sit next to Namjoon on the couch, leaning over and kissing his cheek, then his neck, lightly sucking on his Adam's apple. His strong hands cup your face and kiss you hard and long as he pulls you into his lap. You drape your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss as his hands slide down to your waist, hands gripping your hips, holding you in place on his lap while you kiss and bite along his jawline. Gently rolling your hips into his as a whine releases from your mouth when his strong hand smacks your ass and the other brings your mouth back up to his. His tongue slips into your mouth to kiss you passionately making you see stars as panty breathy moans leave your covered lips.
Slowly we begin to grind against each other, our lips barely separating to breathe before diving back into a hot heated kiss, tongues dancing together in a fight for dominance as y/n pulls at Namjoon's roots and his hands guide your hips into him. Moaning as you feel his length swell below your core that is dripping with need, clenching around nothing.
"Please" y/n breathes into Joon's neck.
That's all it takes to break his resolve as he flips you onto your back laying you on the couch while he hovers above you, pulling back slightly to look at your quivering and flushed face, eyes begging for him to touch you.
Biting your lip, you ask again as your hands trail down his sides, one resting on his hip while the other traces the outline of his hard and clothed cock.
Palming his length he lets out a groan and moves one hand to the hem of your shirt until his hand reaches your uncaged breasts, nipples already peaking beneath the thin fabric.
" Off", Namjoon growls while pulling at your shirt. Complying y/n slowly lifts it over her head, her breasts bouncing slightly from the movement. Without hesitation, Namjoon's mouth latches onto your breast as his other hand tweaks the other nipple causing you to moan slightly. Namjoon moans while kissing and sucking on your breast distracting you from his hand slowly creeping up your thigh to draw small circles at the hem of your pink shorts. Moving closer to your clothed heat.
Pain draws y/n out of her high as Namjoon sucks hard on her breast, marking it with a purplish bruise.
"Jooonie" Y/n coos, pleading for him to stop his ministrations on her chest and move lower, or at least move to where she can reach him as well.
"What do you want baby?", Namjoon smirks up at you as he kisses down your chest and belly sending shivers up your spine and a flame on each spot with every peck as you whine below him, his strong hands still holding you in place, one on your hip and the other casually flicking your nipple.
"Pleease" y/n begs unable to form words from her already dizzy head.
" use your words baby girl, tell daddy what you want" Namjoon coyly asks while dipping lower towards your heat. Y/n tries to press her thighs together to get some form of relief but Namjoon smacks the side of your thigh and pushes open y/n legs wider.
Slowly pulling down your shorts Namjoon edges his face closer to your heat.
Feeling the tip of his nose and hot breath ghosting over her folds and it makes her shudder in anticipation.
" taste me, fuck me with your tongue " y/n pleads as Namjoon gazes at the wet spot on y/n's thin blue panties sticking gently to her folds.
With that Namjoon flicks his tongue against the wet spot, making your stomach do somersaults and your jaw clench. Hooking his fingers into the thing blue fabric he rips the undies away, revealing your plump and dripping pussy.
" I want to make you feel good baby girl, relax and let daddy have a snack " Namjoon purrs between licks and kisses on your inner thighs and mound. Y/n opens her legs wider to let Namjoon be comfortable between them, his nose grinding slowly against her folds as his tongue slowly licks up her juices. Y/n grips Namjoon's blonde & brown hair, silently begging him to go faster or suck on her clit to push her over the edge.
Y/n is close when Namjoon pauses, her slick dripping from his chin as he gets up to kiss you harshly moaning into the kiss.
You taste so good baby, could eat you all day but I want to fill you up instead" Namjoon says driven by lust and need, as he stands to take off his clothes, no longer leaving y/n the only one naked and who is now sitting up on the couch.
Namjoon's thick and long cock springs out from his sweats, no underwear on since he took a shower after getting done with practice and now he just wanted to fill you up as fast as possible with his seed.
Namjoon wraps his hand around his shaft to stroke himself a few times before y/n bats his hand away wanting to stroke him and taste him herself before he stuffs her full.
Y/n grips Namjoon's already leaking cock and pumps it a few times before leaning in and placing a soft kiss on the red mushroom head, a bead of precum slipping out just in time for her to lick it up.
Licking from the tip to the base she gently takes his cock into her mouth. Hollowing her cheeks to suck him deeper into her, while her tongue licks at the underside vein, making more precum leak out to taste on her tongue.
"Fuuuck" Namjoon moans, gripping your hair firmly to keep him steady while you bob on his cock.
"Does sucking daddy's cock make you wet,kitten?" Namjoon asked. All y/n can do to respond is moan around his cock. Y/n continues sucking and licking until she feels Namjoon begin to shake. Letting go with a pop, she leans back onto the couch waiting for him to climb on top of her.
Whining at the sudden cold air on his cock, Namjoon crawls onto the couch, grabbing y/n legs and folding her in half like a pretzel.
" raw, please, like you said, no more being safe. If I get pregnant so what, I want to feel you feel me up" y/n says as she waits for Namjoon's cock to enter her, her core clenching on air begging to be filled.
"I know baby, don't worry there's nothing safe about how I'm going to ruin you" Namjoon huffs as he lines himself up to your leaking entrance.
"I'd say sucking me off really turns you on and leaves you dripping, huh baby?" Namjoon sneers as his length slowly and deliciously stretches her out. Her juices lubricating his length as he bullies his way into her tight pussy. Mewling at the feeling of practically being filled to the brim without all of his cock to fill you, you're too gone for words as you try to grip at his arms above you.
A noticeable bulge shows on your stomach from how deep Namjoon's cock is in your gummy walls and it brings a loud moan from Namjoon's plush slightly bitten lips when he sees it move.
Bottoming out with a grunt Namjoon begins to roll his hips into you, harsh and slow wanting to savor every feel of your gummy walls wrapping around his cock.
" Shit, you're taking me so well" he pants, the restraint evident on his scrunched up face, brows knitted together and tongue slightly slipping out in concentration as he rolls deeper into you.
Moaning y/n slowly lifts her hips wanting to match his pace but a firm hand holds her down at her waist.
"Jooon you're so deep, I want faster, faster please" y/n chokes out between thrust. Without answering he begins to pound into you faster, using your legs to help hold himself up, an ankle in each hand as his pace quickens. The sound of the couch squeaking beneath us with each thrust.
"Ah~ah..ahh, oh my god, fu-fuck baby yes there! Right there!" Y/n screams out, the knots in her stomach growing tighter as he hits that sweet spot that has her shaking.
"God your so fucking tight, going to make me cum too soon" Namjoon grunts through gritted teeth as he leans over you more, draping your ankles over his shoulders, arching your low back off the couch with each forward thrust.
"Ooooh im gonna cum, g'nna cum" y/n screams out, clutching on to Namjoons back, her nails digging in and leaving red marks.
" Do it baby, cum on daddy's cock, make a mess" Namjoon says as he kisses you again, tongue in your mouth to try and silence the screams erupting from your chest.
And with that the knot breaks and you clench hard around his cock while her own relief gushes out onto the base of his cock and onto the couch below us. Y/n screams out as Namjoon pulls back from the force of you cumming on his cock. The squeeze almost too much but he holds back and thrusts into you harder, faster using you to chase his own high until his hips stutter, a sign that he can't hold back any longer.
" fill me up daddy, fill me so full im leaking for days " y/n says as she cups his face and draws him into a sweet kiss.
Shuddering Namjoon cums deep and hard, thick ropes of sticky cum into your pussy, filling you so full it leaks out a bit.
His thrusts slow down as he rides out his high to the pulse of your walls around his leaking cock, draining him dry.
Falling onto her heaving and panting chest y/n gently strokes and kisses the top of Namjoon's head, letting him relax into her until he goes soft.
A breathy"I love you" escapes his lips as he looks up at her and kisses her chest.
" I love you too" y/n says while running her fingers through his hair, smiling.
A few minutes later Namjoon pulls out, heads to the bathroom to grab some towels so he clean you both up.
Moving on to your sides, Namjoon snakes one arm behind your head, stopping momentarily to kiss your cheek before laying completely down next to you, while he is only in his sweats and you're in your undies and his shirt. Namjoon's other arm lays lazily across your waist, hand just barely resting on your tummy.
Y/n wiggles her back into Namjoon's chest wanting to feel him closer to her and sneaks her hand up to hold his.
You fall asleep like that, in each other's arms. Not knowing that this peace won't last long as safety was not your concern this time as those butterflies of love & lust will soon turn into two tiny feet.
Welcome to American Mate's Master List! The Taglist is CLOSED for this story.
This is an OT7 x Plus Sized/Chubby Reader story. The story will have Mature Scenes. The chapters with these adult themes will have (M) in the chapter name, so please 18+ readers only. Within the chapters, at the start and end of the Mature scene will be the following banner, if you want to skip them.
The Hybrid K-pop group BTS is on tour in America; of course, things don't start out the way they should, but after an encounter with Y/n, things change but will everyone follow Fate?
It's Time to Meet the Bangtan Pack
Chapter 1 - Two Weeks Early
Let's introduce you to the world of Hybrids and Playmates. It really is quite simple until a VIP Potential Client's manager walks into your office two weeks early, and it's only a skeleton crew right now.
Chapter 2 - The Playmate Meeting
Bangtan Pack arrives at Playmate Services Inc., USA Idol Division. It's time for the pack to meet the unsigned Playmates, but things don't go as well as planned.
Chapter 3 - Following Instincts
Dealing with the aftermath of the accident, Bangtan Pack reacts upon instincts, some more than others. Y/n learns a few new things.
Chapter 4 - First Case of Alpha Space
Y/n may call herself a Hybrid supporter but never has she dealt with something like this. Y/n gets to see firsthand some of what an Alpha is like when they get a little lost in their instincts.
Chapter 5 - Heated Discussions (M)
Y/n didn't want to cause trouble, but that seemed to be all she did. However, Bangtan Pack thinks sometimes the trouble is worth it.
Chapter 6 - A Proposition for You
Things get intense for Bangtan Pack and Y/n, but not in a good way. Meeting the doctor tonight has bigger implications than Y/n thought was possible.
Chapter 7 - Is This a Joke
After proposing to Y/n the option to become their playmate, the Bangtan Pack struggles to convince her to accept their Prime Alpha's offer. Will Y/n be persuaded or will she run from Fate unknowingly?
Chapter 8 - Time to Tell the Family Pack (M)
While the Bangtang Pack is excited to have Y/n join as a "Play"mate, that may not be the case for her family pack.
Chapter 9 - Shadows of the Past (M)
It becomes clear that pack dynamics can vary from pack to pack. This sometimes leads to interesting reactions. It's where the past can be seen influencing the present that will shadow all.
Chapter 10 - A Date in the Right Direction
After the visit from Dr. Blackwell, some of the Bangtan pack start behaving differently. Is it a good thing or a bad thing? Maybe the eldest Alpha has some insight. (This chapter is Seokjin-centric in honor of his coming home from the military)
Chapter 11 - Just a Staff Member
Y/n stands up for someone else, and everything starts falling apart. Last night was a dream but the reality of the situation finally hits.
Chapter 12 - Everyone Deserves a Second Chance
It's time to make a choice that can make for an adventure or change y/n's life.
Chapter 13 - Shall we?
It's time for the date with Namjoon. Getting ready becomes more fun than you think it could be with an unexpected surprise and new friends, but what happens as the night goes on?
Chapter 14 - Does it Always End in Ruin?
Scenting in a car with the Prime Alpha goes better than expected, but once they return to the pack house, things take a turn for Y/n.
WARNINGS FOR CHAPTER 15! This is a heavy chapter. Please read before reading the full chapter. Thank you 💜💜💜
Chapter 15 - The Pack Meeting and Troubled Pasts
Y/n shares her history with Bangtan Pack and finds she isn't the only one with a dark family life.
American Mate (16) - We are Alphas
Bangtan Pack discusses what to do next, followed by Namjoon's attempt to correct things.
As a paid member of my Patreon, you can read extra spicy smutty scenes and additional content, and have early release benefits for each chapter.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Reader Asks
Has the Bangtan Pack been with a woman before?
How would The Bangtan Pack react to finding Y/n dancing?
Additional Content
Meet Alpha Giant Flemish Rabbit Jungkook's Family
Patreon Artwork Poll Results (1)
American Mate (5) - Extended Scenting Scene (M)
American Mate (8) - Extended/ Additional Scene (M)
older noona chubby reader x annoying brat jungkook (7 year age gap)
Disclaimer: cursing, ethically/morally dubious
Can always expand it into a full story if you guys want. As is the case with most of my fics.
"You darn brat!!! Get over here!! Trying to give me a bloody aneurysm, aren't you?", I beseeched the doe-eyed four foot tall chubby two year old from hell . I hated babysitting but my mother insisted I take care of her best friend's kid, no matter how annoying the kid was.
Jeon Jungkook , the tubby tot who had the facial structure of a marshmallow, was a bane of my freaking existence. He was always either wailing or running around like a headless chicken. You would think he learned to walk since he was born, by the way he was stumbling around precariously with a head too big for his fleshy body.
He was in his bobble head era. As both my mom and aunt (the antichrist's mother) walked through the door, I heard a thud as the big headed kid fell face first onto the floor. Mom and aunt rushed to where the miserable twat had fallen. They squaaked at me like angry mother hens, my mother yelling at me, a deep furrow of a frown on her forehead, " How could you be so irresponsible Y/N? HE'S SUCH AA LITTLE BABY!! I DIDN'T RAISE YOU TO BE THIS WAY, SO NEGLIGENT"!!
Quivering in an agitated state of anger, I snapped back, " He hasn't fallen on his head like this till you two came in. He has it out to make me look bad. Look at you taking the side of a kid you didn't even birth". I stomped out of the room in dismay, not missing the smug smirk of the two year old devil incarnate, glinting his demonic dark eyes at me as though in laughter. He did it purposefully. I didn't have proof, but the mother fucking twit was out to get me.
You all may have thought I was delusional, but this was just the beginning of the torture this kid would put me through for the rest of my remaining lifetime.
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11 years later
Lounging at the pool on a fine summer's day, wearing a hot pink swimsuit and reading a historical romance novel---the definition of a perfect day. It was perfect, till a Satanic child decided to ruin it.
"CALLABUNGA!!!!!", a shriek pierced the air as a whirring tan little body jumped into the swimming pool, making my book and swimsuit completely drenched in salty chlorinated water. I coughed, having swallowed some of the water, sputtering out in disdain, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU NASTY KID?!!! I WAS FIVE FEET AWAY, HOW DID YOU STILL MANAGE TO GET ME SO WET"?!!!
The 13 year old who shouldn't even be close to capable of smirking sinisterly, capitulated rather proudly, "Stop yelling Ajumma. This is probably the first time you ever got a man to get you wet. Why be so angry about it"? He preened as though he were a cat that caught the cream.
I could feel indignation skitter across my skin, as my body shook in fury, "You miserable excuse of a kid!! More like the antichrist, should've had 666 taped to your bloody forehead when you were born". I got up and stormed out of the veranda. This kid was so immature and often didn't even act his age. Who even implied stuff of that nature at his age? Weird kid. I should probably stay away from him. He might end up like one of those psychopaths that show signs of insanity and perverseness early on.
If only my mom wasn't literally a best friend of his.
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8 years later
If the universe had a sense of humor- it sure had a cruel one. A rather vindictive, twisted bend of fate. Because why was I sitting here on the couch munching on potato chips, still working a mundane 9-5 job when my arch-nemesis was a start up millionaire.
The mischievous eyes, cool and calm glaring through the tv screen enraged me. Who knew the kid that was too busy clogging my pool filter with Doritos a few years ago would be this renowned, skilled, and rich?
The TV screen flickered to life as the host of the talk show smoothly drawled, "Now presenting our youngest start up giant of this year , tech prodigy and founder of NebulaSynx, Jeon Jungkook". My nostrils flared as I stared at the kid whose diapers I had painstakingly changed morph into a handsome man on the screen before my very eyes. Perfectly tailored suit. Freshly chiseled jawline. His narrow nose housing a dainty pair of gold rimmed glasses, jet black hair I remember detangling religiously for years slightly tousled.
The antichrist had grown up. The ominous, diabolical beast.
The host continued, "So, your software was innovative to the tech world, especially when it comes to AI and its military/security applications. What does your software exactly do though Jungkook? A brief description for the unaware youth watching our show if you would please".
Jungkook barely straightened up, in a relaxed pose on the couch as though he owned the place. His authoritative aura emitted through a mere tv screen. "Simply put, my software helps disable and decode military machinery security components , descry difficult to solve codes and passwords, and helps create uncannily accurate visual assumptions based on the data input it receives". He paused, looking at the audience with a half-smile, hair partially covering his electric eyes ,"To make it even simpler, if you got a machine gun, I can disable it with my software, without even manually touching it-- from a safe distance".
The audience gasped in awe, shocked at such a possibility.
The host of the show smiled, "That is seriously amazing Jungkook. It is a crazy, unheard of feat that you have achieved. Tell me, how exactly did you get the inspiration to launch a company with such mind-boggling software? And how did you first test it out"?
Jungkook chuckled.
Oh no, whenever that kid as much as smiles, it's always because he got away with something or accomplished something satanic enough to be that happy.
Looking back at the host with a delighted quirk of his mouth, he responded, "I was curious to see how someone looked naked. Not a very moral aim I admit. But a very necessary one". The audience snickered through the screen, vastly engaged by his lewd quip .
Where the hell was this going? My mind was buzzing.
He continued, not even ashamed, a fervor blazing in his eyes , "The only way was to use existing, normal pictures of her and use AI technology to ascertain the gaps as accurately as possible. I never did get a good picture of her. But, this initial endeavor lead me to other achievements and discoveries as you can see".
The host looked appalled and slightly amused, chiding him ,"Well Jungkook, that claim is rather shocking in nature. You sure you want to admit that on national TV? Wouldn't the lady, whoever she is, wherever she is, take offense to this"?
"She's been in my life since I was a little kid. I'm sure she wouldn't mind", he said with a dangerous, almost challenging glint in his eyes as he smirked at the screen. As if he knew. As if he bloody knew I would be watching. And with the dauntless confidence that he would be suffering no consequences from what he said and did. Like he always had. Since he was a baby.
This kid was a dead man walking. I would be going to jail, because there was no way that I was not going to murder this kid. Fuck my life.
A/N: I can't even describe how excited and proud of myself I am to finally get this out on paper. My brain has been riddled with this story ever since I had a dream that inspired it. I can't wait to share this with y'all! I'm going to be figuring out how to make a masterlist tonight that I will keep updated with the main story, along with any extra goodies like playlists or Pinterest boards if anyone would be interested in any of that stuff. Please enjoy. Lots of love ~ Delyn <3
P.S: I moved accounts! So all further updates will be posted to @yoongleboonglepie! Much love
word count: ~13k
Chapter playlist-Youtube music
Chapter Playlist-Spotify
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You have been invited to celebrate with us!
The Wörner Hotel and Estate is celebrating 150 years of providing excellent service to all of our guests, and we want you to be a part of it! Built in 1875 by German settlers Matthäus and Felizitas Wörner, it is a nature lover’s dream; nestled between the edge of Michaux State Forest and historic Gettysburg Pennsylvania. This luxury hotel is the perfect balance between historical and luxury. We have everything you may need from live entertainment, multi-room suites, a freshly updated swimming pool, 24-hour room service, daily activities or fitness classes, valet parking, onsite grocery, and more. And with over one hundred acres of gorgeous grounds to explore, you’ll never get bored! Well, what are you waiting for? There’s no greeting warmer than at The Wörner Hotel and Estate!
Y/n’s fingers fiddled with the gold embossed invitation absent-mindedly, her eyes finding it difficult to keep their attention on anything else other than the piece of paper that felt so heavy in her lap. She had fought herself incessantly about what to do with it since it had wedged itself haphazardly into her mail slot, a physical embodiment of what a thorn in her side it was. Its arrival shouldn't have caused as much emotional turmoil as it did. She should have expected it, she had told herself repeatedly in order to calm her nerves, which worked about as well as a sinner praying their way through a last-ditch effort to make it to heaven. And despite what this invitation may say, Wörner Hotel and Estate seemed like anything but heaven to her right now - Hell would be a more fitting name. Seeing the sketched out image of the hotel printed on the bottom shot her back into her childhood memories of sitting short and wide-eyed as she watched different guests all busy up the stairs to enjoy their vacation, or where the tours would disappear onto the different walking trails. Only turning her attention away when she realized they had not noticed her presence, to whatever toys she set up on the front veranda that day- usually animal figurines whose feet and faces had been gnawed off by the family dog, or severely mistreated Barbies.
She floated through all of her memories of growing up in the hotel with great resistance: Stampeding through the gardens with the staff children after cold elementary school days; Guests that just never seemed to leave; Her parents lavish parties in the ballroom; Phantom touches in the lobby; Swimming in the lake up at the state park on warm summer nights with her sisters and younger brother and pigging out on smores late into the evening.
Her younger sister’s death.
Ghostly figures in long hallways, reaching their hands out to grab her. Always watching.
Her friends. Her fight with her parents.
Everything she didn’t want to remember had been stamped with a wax seal and thrown back into her orbit against her will. She hasn’t spoken to her parents in four years as of this past Christmas, and her younger brother Roland has become increasingly difficult to keep on the phone for longer than 10 minutes before he loses interest in their conversations. Her elder sister Amelia, only three years older than y/n herself, has been radio silent since the night Y/N left the hotel and didn’t return. Their relationship was barely kept afloat by obligatory texts on holidays and birthdays.
All this makes Y/n wonder why they ever thought she would go back and why they even sent this invitation to her? Who still even worked there? And what in god's name took over her mind to have her bag packed with a rushed explanation to her two very confused roommates, and seated on the first Amtrak train from D.C back to Pennsylvania? Maybe it was the residual emptiness of missing her family from the past holiday season, or maybe it was a nagging feeling in her stomach that told her she needed to.
The train slowed down as it reached some small station outside the border of Pennsylvania state lines that Y/N can’t be bothered to hear the name of. She glanced out the window to watch a few stragglers shuffle on and off of the train car in front of her thoughtlessly, their impatient and rushed steps of no real interest to her.
With it being mid morning on a weekday, she had just missed rush hour and consequently the train wasn’t as busy. This gave her space and time to think about what to text to her driver-whoever that is-which she hasn’t done yet and probably should. She only had less than an hour before she arrived at the Philadelphia station, and the drive from the hotel was almost triple that. With a gentle jolt, the train begins to pick up momentum again, its grinding metal and loud engine squealing at her to hurry up.
Biting her lip, she pulls out her phone and looks at the messy pen scribble of her mother’s handwriting on the bottom of her invitation: a phone number she doesn’t recognize and a short “Call if you need a ride :)” message next to it. The friendliness of the smiley face seemingly contradictory of the basic impersonal invitation she was sure they sent to anyone and everyone.
Maybe they didn’t expect her to come and they just felt obligated to send it? Turning the thought over in her head, she shook it away with a shudder. It was too late to have these doubts now-the hum of the train beneath her seat and the “Welcome to Pennsylvania!” sign making that abundantly clear. Punching the number into her phone, she hit the call button before she could give herself time to second-guess it. It rings once. Twice. A third time. Only stopping when the receiver tells her the number can’t be reached and to try again later.
“Fuck.” Y/N curses under her breath, remembering that she is, in fact, in a metal tube speeding through tunnels and trees that really push the boundaries of her average cell phone line. She types the number in again and waits this time until the train pulls into another small stop right at the southernmost part of Pennsylvania. She had not maybe 30 minutes (if she was lucky) before her train ride would come to its dreaded end. Thumbing the call button, she waited. This time it rang only twice before an overly enthusiastic voice answered on the other line.
“A warm greeting from The Wörner Hotel and Estate! Front desk and lobby services, this is Seokjin speaking. How may I assist you today?” His voice was smooth and light on the ears, but it hit her as anything but light. The name made her entire form tense up, and a nervous sweat prick at her brow. The reality of what she was doing truly settling into her system as the voice of an old friend forced her to face the consequences of her actions head-on. It's fine, She told herself, he probably doesn't even care. It's been years...
“Hello? May I help you?” He quipped again, a bit less perky than the first time.
Realizing that she hadn’t responded she choked out “Yes! Yes, one moment please!” She mentally face-palmed herself for such a clumsy response. “This is Y/N. Y/N Wörner. Anslem and Mariah’s daughter.”
A moment of fuzzy silence met her ears causing her to shift anxiously in her seat. She was in the process of checking the phone screen to see if he had hung up when shuffling noises on the other end of the line jolted her phone back to her ear and his silver-tone voice cut through the static.
“Oh! Yes forgive me-Mrs. Wörner had mentioned you might reach out.” He let out a smooth chuckle before continuing on. “I assume you are calling for transportation services?” If he was surprised, his tone didn’t show it.
Y/N nodded, before catching that he could not see her with a “Yes, please!”
“Great! What’s the pick up address?” Y/N could hear the smile in his words and she flushed with embarrassment at how not put together she sounded. What a wonderful "first" impression she's giving him of her adult self.
“It’s going to be the Philadelphia Amtrak station.” Her eyes flitted to the trees dotted with new buds outside her window, finding their gentle sway in the wind soothing enough to qualm her racing heart.
“Awesome... And what time will your train be arriving at the station, Ms. Wörner?” She heard the click of a pen, and the scratch of its ink on the paper.
“Well, you see about that…” She trailed off as the train began to leave the small station, the pen scratching mimicking her pause. “Maybe 20 minutes or so?” She laughed nervously at her own obvious lack of foresight. If he had managed to scrounge up any good impression of her during their call, she had just metaphorically tossed it out of her train window.
Seokjin guffawed on the other end of the line and openly sputtered out a “20 minutes?! That's an almost 3 hour drive, miss. I will send someone out right away, but will you be alright waiting?” Y/n could tell he was trying his best to cover up his anxious outburst with concern, and the formality in his phrase feeling foreign and uncomfortable to her ears.
“I’ll be fine. I’ll grab something to eat and hunker down on a bench. It’s my fault for not calling sooner…” Y/N’s voice trickled out as she realized how this might make them look to her parents-making a guest wait for longer than they would approve of. She made a mental note to herself that she would just happen to forget to mention it during any conversations with them.
“Alright then Ms. Wörner. Your driver will reach out to you via text to share their information, location services, and a description of their vehicle. " She heard the unmistakable clicking of frantic computer keys as the previous anxiety in his tone faded and his customer service voice took over once again. "Please have your phone on hand with notifications on in case they need to reach you with any questions. Is there anything else I can help you with today?
“No, that is everything. Thank you, Jin.” The nickname spilled from her lips with a practiced ease that surprised her own self, but he carried on like he didn’t seem to notice.
“Wonderful! I will see you later in the evening.” She could hear him typing something into his computer before the clacking ceased and a moment of silence enveloped them again. This time the silence felt eerily wrong and awkward. She could almost hear the sharp exhale before his voice drifted through the phone at a volume so quiet she almost missed it.
"I'm sorry- I couldn't catch that." She laughed trying to lighten the sudden shift in atmosphere.
“It’s…” He paused, seemingly weighing the sound of his own words on his tongue. “It’s good to have you back, Y/n.”
The dial tone signaled that the line had ended, but she still found herself holding the speaker to her ear much longer than she needed to. The way he said her name with so much heaviness had her whole world spinning. It was both nerve-wracking and comforting that he remembered her. It meant she hadn’t been gone long enough for anyone to truly forget as easily as she had wished they could-for she should know better than to expect from them what she could never do within herself-and she couldn’t decide if that was a blessing or a curse.
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Hi there, Y/N! I am about 15 minutes out from the station. I will park out front in the pick up line- black Hyundai, license plate no. JHP-0613. See you soon!! :) - Hoseok J.
Y/n used a greasy finger to swipe the notification bar down to read the message. So Hoseok ended up staying to work at the hotel too? She tapped the straw of her empty soda cup to her lips in thought. She would’ve bet money that he would’ve at least been working in the live entertainment part of the hotel; destined to follow in his parents’ footsteps more so than one of their chauffeur drivers.
His father, Jeonghun Jung or Mr. Jung, had been an exceptional live swing and jazz singer in the evenings in the main restaurant on the property, the Adelaide, with his mother Misuk Jung performing duets with him on rare occasions. Hoseok had been his mother’s favorite dance partner during her weekly swing dancing classes, and he had done wonderful stage work even at a young age. He should’ve had a straight shot to take their place once they retired, and they couldn’t possibly still be performing these days at the rate they had with their age, Y/n mused. Unless things really had changed drastically while she had been away. It made her wonder if everyone had stayed at the hotel except for her.
She scoffed at the thought. Last she heard the Min’s boy applied to a college up in New York, and Jins cousin always was a smart kid-he must’ve left first chance he could. They had been more of her sister's crowd even though their age gap wasn't that drastic-having grown in distance from Y/n herself once high school made that small age gap seem wider than it was.
Shaking her thoughts away, she wiped the grease of her fast food meal on her pants and typed a simple “Great! See you then.”
She swung her bags onto her shoulders with a grunt, and leisurely strolled through the station, only pausing to toss her soda cup away in a nearby trash can. Y/n pushed through the exit and found a spot for herself near the pick-up line that wasn't too uncomfortably close to other passengers awaiting their rides.
Taking in her surroundings, she eyed the bridge leading up to the station and watched all the pedestrians walking their own beat into the cement. The thing about Pennsylvania is that anywhere in the ungodly large state feels familiar. Maybe it’s the constant stark contrast of natural beauty and old cement monstrosities, or perhaps it’s the feeling that every place in this humid state is haunted with its own age and existence. Being surrounded by the bustling nature of Philly’s atmosphere reminded her of taking trips here with her family, having walked the same sidewalk following the bridge to and from the train station many times.
A rhythmic vibration grew in volume and stole her attention away from her surroundings as a sleek black car pulled into the spot closest to her. The hip-hop song cut off as the driver's side door opened and a head of long wavy brown hair framing a wide heart shaped grin popped out from within.
“Y/n! Wow!” He let out a short whistle as he leaped onto the sidewalk with ease, and traipsed over to wrap her in a tight hug before she could protest. “It’s been waayyy too long.”
Her arms loosely wrapped themselves around his small waist, and all she could smell was orange blossom and pine-The latter being one of the signature smells surrounding the estate and the former being purely just how she remembered Hoseok. For a few moments the smell took her back to sitting shoulder to shoulder with him and his mother, a large mug of mulled orange tea, and their backs bent over a card game with crisp autumn air permeating the room from an open window. At that time it had been nearly impossible to keep him off his feet after he had suffered an injury from playing too roughly with the other boys. He had been practically melting from boredom, and had lost a lot of his usual shine from being sheltered in on himself. A shine that radiated off of him like a thousand suns at the present day.
“Ugh, not long enough." She lamented, and he released her from the hug with a dramatic roll of his eyes.
“Yeah, yeah. Save that attitude for your folks, not me.” His eyes trailed from her and the backpack and overstuffed carry on bag digging into her shoulders, before his warm brown eyes found hers again with a click of his tongue. “Is that all you brought? I figured for such a long stay there would at least be a suitcase-hell even a second backpack.”
Y/n tilted her head at him, confused. “ Such a long stay?”
Hoseok raised a brow at her response and chuckled. “I mean, yeah. I assume you’re staying for the entire anniversary celebration schedule-are you not?” He gestured to the straps on her shoulder, and she immediately shrugged them off and into his waiting hands. The relief her shoulder blades felt was unmatched at the moment.
She hesitated in her response, choosing instead to watch him pop the trunk and place her bags in. She hadn’t actually thought about how long she’d be here, she realized. Weirdly enough, her mind felt too fuzzy to bother worrying about another thing today-so she waited for his eyes to glance up at her over the open trunk to give him a shrug.
“I didn’t think that far ahead, if I’m being honest.”
He let out a boisterous laugh and slammed the trunk shut. “Seriously, you must not have changed that much.” Continuing to chuckle, he rounded the side of the car to the passenger side, and swung the door open in a dramatic gesture and a flash of his blinding smile. “After you, Ms. Wörner.”
With a smile and a shake of her head, she settled into the front seat. He closed the door once certain she was fully in the car, and skipped to the driver side door and swung himself in and slammed the door in one swift move.
“Are you always this casual with all your passengers?” Y/n turned to face him with a teasing smile.
He snorted. “God, no-I like having my job.” He flicked the turn signal on for only a half second before swerving into the passing lane, immediately keeping pace with the other philly drivers. The hip hop song resumed at a lower volume than before, filling the car with a laid back atmosphere. “I have all my passengers sit in the back whenever possible. They can be really…” He paused trying to find the right word while switching lanes to take a westward exit. “Annoying.” he concluded.
“And I’m not 'annoying' to you?” Y/n laughed, thinking about the amount of times he had referred to her as such as a child.
“You?” He let his eyes flicker to her briefly, sliding a sly smile on his face before returning his gaze to the road. “Never.”
The drive went by quickly with such an engaging driver by her side. He was sure to ask all about her time in D.C., and she readily supplied him with answers. She told him all about her starting school, then in turn dropping out after her first year after feeling like no major fit her goals (if she even knew what those were anymore). A fact she was usually much too embarrassed to share, but he took it with no judgement. Instead taking the conversation elsewhere, like her current hobbies and interests, or prodding into her dislike for her roommates with exaggerated humor. She didn’t realize how much she had missed talking with him. Why didn’t she reach out to him? To any of them? She wondered.
As if her brain liked being cruel her to when she was finally able to slip into states of peace, it forcefully pulled one of her last prominent memories of him.
Her face was hot and wet as she stomped out of the private dining room. The gentle sway of Nat King Cole that used to be her favorite around this time of year had become her least favorite thing in the world at the moment, each note hitting her ears sharply. Her head pounding in retaliation to what was once a subtle volume now seeming like it bounced tauntingly in her skull, telling her to have a ‘Merry Christmas”. If she wasn’t so angry she would’ve laughed at the irony. She didn’t get far down the festively lit hall before she ran face first into Hoseok, his hands still damp from having just been washed bracing her shoulders, and his concerned voice muffled by her own blood rushing through her ears. She met his worried and imploring eyes, his wavy hair only just gracing his brows back then, and all she saw reflecting back in his eyes was her own swollen and disheveled reflection. Then his face fell into the same shape everyone else in the dining room had. Pity.
She hated it. It made her skin crawl, and her stomach bubble in self-defensive rage. He was looking at her the same way Mr. and Mrs. Min just had. Like the Jeon and Kim families had. Like Hoseok’s parents had. It made her sick.
“Did you know too?” She spat out.
He stuttered at her sudden intensity. “W-what? What are you-”
She pushed her finger into his chest sharply. “Don’t you lie to me, Hoseok Jung.”
A moment of stillness gripped them both in a heavy hand that's fingers were closing in on them, one at a time in a tight fist, trying to take its time suffocating them. His eyes flickered back and forth between both of hers and then she saw it-his chin crinkled just so-and it gave him away to her in an instant.
She let out a wet angry laugh that sounded closer to a sob. “So you too, huh?” She took a staggered step back, feeling like with every step the floor was pulling her deeper. Like it was trying to pull her through the floorboards so it could swallow her whole. At this moment she wanted it to. “Did everyone know?”
“Y/n, listen I-” His eyes were glassy, saying more to her than his words could.
“Save it.” She shoved past his outstretched hands and began the pathetic walk of shame back to her room. She hated crying in front of people, and it seems like everyone in the house had gotten a front row seat and an encore. She heard him call out for her, but it didn’t stop her. She didn’t have the strength to face any more betrayal than she already had.
“Y/n? You still with me?” Hoseok took one hand off the wheel to playfully wave it in front of her face.
She pushed his hand and her memories away in fake annoyance with a gentle ‘sorry’.
He shook it off with a laugh.
“So what about you? Your parent-are they still performing at the Adelaide?” Y/n snuck a sideways glance to judge his response.
He let out a heavy sigh. “Ah…no not really. My dad will sometimes sing some of his old classics on busy weekends, and my mom switched from swing classes to waltzing lessons. But otherwise they’re mostly retired from the entertainment industry and doting on my sister. Old age and achy bones and all that.”
Y/n nodded along, trying not to ask the burning question of why he hadn’t taken their spot. Before the question could sear it’s way off her tongue he spoke again, seeming to read her thoughts.
“You remember the Kims 2.0? Not Seokjin and Namjoon kinda Kims. The new Kims." He gave her befuddled expression a brief sideways glance and continued to clarify. "Thinking about it, I guess you probably didn’t get to spend as much time with them before you were sent off to all those different schools. And they were usually gone around the holidays as his parents don’t care too much for Christmas. They were only around for a couple months before they hired their son permanently.”
Y/n’s face scrunched in thought as she tried to remember their arrival. “The Kims 2.0?”
Hoseok hummed. “Yeah. They were hired after y-” He seemed to catch himself “After I broke my leg-sometime around there. They do stage planning and such. They travel a lot and work remotely from California most of the time though.”
When Y/n didn’t give him much of a reaction he clicked his tongue and moved on.
“Well, their son, Taehyung-he’s got this singing voice that’s undeniably born for big band and jazz-they would’ve been a fool not to give him the job the second he turned 21. It didn’t take much convincing for him to take my dad’s place.” There was tension in his tone that he seemed to be trying to cover with his usual nonchalance. But she could pick up on his discomfort-the a passage of time doing nothing to rust what had once been second nature-and decided to change the topic.
“Huh. I guess the name sounds familiar…but tell me,” she turned her body to face him and folded her hands in her lap. “Who else stayed behind?”
“Once a gossip, always a gossip.” He rolled his eyes, but another small genuine smile was breaking across his face.
When he didn’t start talking immediately, she gave him an expectant look.
“Alright, I’ll spoil the surprise, geez.” He turned the car onto an exit, signaling their time on major highways ending and the time of battlefield side roads and wooded winding paths etched into the scenery. Satisfied with that, she turned her head to look out her window- she could see the main town of Gettysburg in the distance, outlined by the setting sun.
“Seokjin works the desk and maintains the lobby, as you are aware. Usually I work as a valet or chauffeur. But sometimes I pick up random jobs around the place when I’m not busy: like working the pool or picking up shifts at the convenience store and gift shop. Pretty much anywhere they need me.” He turned off the main road that would’ve sent them straight through downtown Gettysburg, and veered onto the start of the long scenic back roads that led to the Hotel and Estate. “Sometimes even giving Yoongi a hand with electrical issues when he needs-”
“Yoongi? I thought he went to a university in New York?” Y/n couldn’t contain her disbelief.
“Oh, yeah. He did, but came back about 3 years in. Said something about needing to figure some things out before he went back to finish.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. Anyways, our Jiminie is one of our tour guides and the historian” Hoseok cooed, “You should pop into one of his tours of the property in the morning! I don’t know if anyone has gotten around to telling him about you coming back yet.”
The way he said coming back with such finality settled heavily in her stomach-like he had expected her to come back-like he was expecting her to stay. She rolled her eyes at her own thoughts; that was definitely just her anxiety speaking.
“Jungkook works housekeeping right now-but he’s been weighing going into security training. I’m sure he's just ecstatic to hear about you. “ Hoseok wiggled his eyebrows aggressively and gave her a teasing smile.
“Oh shut up with that, he was always just my good friend.” Y/n flushed lightly, knowing full well Jungkook had not seen her as just a friend throughout their childhood. Always trailing after her like a puppy because for some reason her awkwardness, lack of social skills, and very strict way of organizing her animal figurines must have really drawn him in. He hadn’t ever actually said anything to her about it, choosing instead to be a good friend who was a great shoulder to lean on. But even with obliviousness being a top skill on her metaphorical resume, she had been able to tell.
“Uh huh. You tell yourself that, Mrs. Jeon~”
“Oh my god! We were FIVE. Playing house was serious business back then and you know it-we even got divorced twice. TWICE! Does the word divorce not mean anything to you?” Y/n couldn’t contain her laughter by the end of her defense, and neither could he.
“What was the first one about again?”
Y/n waved her hand dismissively “Oh-he wouldn’t let me name our pretend pet dolphin Shoeshine or something like that. Said the dolphin needed a more distinguished name.”
“Damn, that really does sound like very serious business.” He cackled.
“Don’t act like you’re innocent here!” She spun her entire body in her seat to face him “I also married YOU once. AND Yoongi.”
He gave a loud overdramatic gasp. “So you admit to cheating on me? All these years I wondered…what a shame.”
They dissolved into a fit of giggles before a comfortable silence settled in the vehicle. Glancing back over at him to quip another remark about their fake marriage, she paused. He seemed to want to say something else with the way his mouth tightened before opening momentarily-then snapping it shut with pursed lips. He must’ve decided to just say it, his voice breaking the silence.
“Your sister is still off in Europe, so we haven’t seen her since the last time you were both back for the holidays.” He flexed his fingers against the wheel to ease the budding tension from his body. She could tell he was avoiding bringing up what happened during that holiday visit that caused her sister to run to foreign college programs- and she couldn’t blame him. Their reluctance to speak of the topic made it easy for him to quickly move on.
“Roland goes to school nearby for now, but I don’t see him often enough to give you much more than that.” He offered with an apologetic shrug. “And last but not least-Namjoon has taken up landscaping maintenance and gardening. He does a great job with it too-It is what he went to school for after all.” Hoseok chuckled, trying to keep the mood light again.
“So he did make it to school?” Y/n quipped in.
“Yeah, he did some hybrid program that had him in and out of California to study Botany and Horticulture, with a minor in some sort of plant management….something. You can ask him about the specifics.”
“Huh.” Y/n fell back in her seat, her shoulders sagging against the seat.
“What?” He glanced over at her as he made a right turn onto the gradual hill that snaked it’s way to the front lawn gates.
“It’s just…” She saw the gates of the driveway in the distance and her heart tightened painfully in her chest. “Everyone stayed. I was so sure most of you would’ve banked the second they got the chance.” Everyone but me.
His grip tightened on the wheel.
“We tried, but it’s almost like this place-” He paused with a sharp exhale. “-you just feel like you never want to leave.”
His words were genuine, but his smile was not. It was the first smile she’d seen from him today that didn’t meet his eyes
Pulling into the gate she felt her heart somehow squeeze tighter, and she tried to shake away the unsettling feeling that found a home in her chest at his words. Instead turning her attention to the old metal gates that were always propped open to welcome its endless flow of guests. The long front lawn decorated in hardy shrubs dotted inbetween with budding nursery plants, the soil around them was still loose and fresh, probably new additions to welcome the coming of spring. Her eyes surveyed the clash of the familiar and unfamiliar. The plants looked different than the usual flora species she remembered them traditionally planting, it looked like someone was experimenting with a new layout-probably Namjoon- she concluded. Hoseok took the gravel road at a relaxed place, giving her time to take it all in. The outside of the hotel remained the same- A combination of colonial and old European romance. Boxy, yet elegant, and still unimaginably huge. Her eyes flitted from the front stairs and followed to the right around to the side veranda built onto the sloping hill, so you can gaze down into a heavy tree line and over the-
“What the fuck is that?” Y/n pointed at a rounded protrusion from the right side of the building towards a dome of glass panels where the outdoor pool used to rest.
“What? The pool?” He slowed the car to a stop so she could get a better look at it. “They built a greenhouse dome around the outside portion of it to extend its year round use. It’s really nice inside. Next shift I work at the pool, I'll come grab you and you can keep me company while I keep an eye out for drowning children.” After she had a few moments to take in the new addition, he put the car into motion, snaking his way through the roundabout and stopping at the base of the stone steps.
“Here we are!” He sang unbuckling both of their seatbelts. He hopped out of his seat the instant he put the car in park, and shut the door behind him without sparing her a glance. She heard the trunk open, and the shake of the car that made her sway in her seat as he pulled her stuff out of the trunk. In any other circumstance, she’d think he was trying to be annoying, a classic move on his part of avoiding her gaze and leaving her in the dust to see who could make it to the front doors first. But this time she could tell he was giving her space to take it in, and for that she was grateful.
She took a deep breath and gripped the door handle with three fingers. She watched through the window as Hoseok started carrying her bags up the stairs at aleisurelye pace, taking his own time in order to give her more. She felt the handle give under her hands, and the rush of chilly early spring air brushed against her skin, and the symphony of bugs and the sound of the tree branches dancing in the breeze met her ears.
The hair on her limbs stood up in succession, sending chills across her entire form. One of her feet met the ground, and the crunch of gravel felt so loud in her ears. It rattled her bones and made every muscle coil up, like an animal preparing to run from danger. She stood, putting both feet on the ground, an intense feeling getting stronger the closer she got to the stairs. Her heart thrummed in time with each one of her steps, and her ears began to ring. Hoseok had already made it to the doors, and was conversing with a luggage boy. Why did he feel so far away all of the sudden? The air suddenly felt as though it was closing in on her with each pace and the ringing in her ears was so loud, she thought they might bleed.
The bottom of her shoes met the first stone step with a thud, and suddenly all was quiet. She froze, unable to move any further. No more bugs, no sway of the tree branches in the wind. The ringing in her ears had ceased. Only the sound of her breathing and her heartbeat remained, which felt so small in comparison to this open ended silence. She couldn’t even hear Hoseok’s distant voice talking to the men standing at the doors; it was like they weren’t even there anymore. Glancing up, she found that they were in fact no longer there.
The space they had occupied showed no sign of life. The doors were still open, yet no light emitted from the windows or the threshold. She was alone. The door was still open, but was now occupied by a pulsing darkness that felt both overwhelmingly alive yet utterly empty. The silence became suffocating.
The dark blue of the spring night sky no longer felt peaceful-it felt dangerous. It was as though she had a thousand eyes on her from all directions, waiting with baited breath for her to fall right into their hungry, gaping mouths. From her right side, a cloud of cold air curled around her leg and weaved itself between her palm and fingers, coiling itself tighter around them like it was holding onto her and keeping her from turning back. The gravel road gave way with a crunch behind her, and then she heard it. A whisper so quiet it almost blended into the chill breeze.
“Welcome home.”
Suddenly the world snapped back into motion, nearly knocking her off her feet with its force. The bugs resumed their song, and the trees their swaying dance. Her chest was rising rapidly as her eyes searched frantically at the warmly lit windows, and the once dark and empty door now bursting with a warm inviting glow. In front of it her eyes landed on where Hoseok stood, giving directions to the luggage boy as he handed them her bags. Suddenly wanting nothing more than to be near him and the inviting light of the lobby, she sped up the stairs as fast as her legs could take her.
“-private estate. You can put them on the second-floor landing. Thank you.”
By the time she reached him, her heart was beating out of her chest and she had begun to sweat-from nerves or the speed at which she pushed herself up the stairs she couldn’t tell.
He turned his head to speak to her and did a double take.
“Woah- what happened to you? You look like you might be sick.” His hand gently brushed his hand across her forehead to check her temperature, and his other hand held her forearm to steady her. She was sure it must’ve come back damp but he didn’t comment on it, instead choosing to remain quiet with his mouth twisted in contemplation. His eyes flickered over her shoulder down to the car, and paused there for a moment before meeting hers. Abruptly, he turned and stepped through the front doors of the lobby.
The high white stone and gold ceiling outlined in ornate crown molding, brightly lit with a large chandelier hanging proud over the lobby seating was as grand as she remembered. Hoseok didn’t give her time to marvel over it, his shoes clacking loudly on the polished floor as he beelined for the check in desk located against the back wall, passing all of the seating and the barreled ceiling hallway to her left that led to the theater hall below them. The large wooden board behind the man behind the counter’s wide frame was dotted with golden keys hanging from their large metal rings- “it keeps the charm!” her father had insisted when they talked about changing to key cards. She watches the man behind the desk reach one and swipe the one hanging under the number 203, handing it to the family he was checking in. Her eyes’s mesmerized by the way the rest of the keys glittered in the yellow glow of the extravagant light fixtures mounted next to it.
Her father let her sit in during their meeting with staff and other executives during the discussion about what updates they’d like to see in the next 10 years. She had taken the opportunity very seriously- her favorite Clifford the Big Red Dog pencil with a frog shaped eraser gripped purposefully in her small hands, scribbling down notes she deemed worthy in a batman themed notebook. The moment Mr. Jeon had suggested a keycard system, and the room was divided between moving with modern technology, or keeping the surviving key system they’d had since the first guest stayed in the hotel. She remembered the way her father, after sitting with his brows creased deep in thought, turned his gaze to her and grinned. “What does the future inheritor of the Wörner estate say?”
“I can help the next person.” Seokjin’s clear tone brought her into the present, jolting her heart that had just barely managed to calm itself from whatever happened outside.
His warm brown almond shaped eyes and friendly smile made her heart feel warm with nostalgia-giving her a much needed distraction. He gave her a once over and his face immediately fell into a look of irritation as he turned to Hoseok, who sauntered up to the edge of the desk.
“Checking in a Ms. Wörn-”
“What did you do to her? I sent you because I thought you’d be a good fit to make her feel comfortable, not to torture her!” He reached his hand up and gently smacked Hoseok upside the head.
“Hey!”
“Hey what? I knew I should’ve sent Namjoon instead.” He turned to his left, muttering something along the lines of sending a clown to do the lord's work as he rummaged through what looked like a mini fridge tucked under the desk.
“Ugh Jin, pull it together.” He reached over the counter to poke Seokjin’s puffed out cheeks, and the latter immediately brought his hands up to swat him away. “And anyways, I’d give Namjoon five seconds into Philly before he would’ve gotten into an accident. He doesn’t know how to drive in cities.”
Seokjin stood back up, nudging the mini fridge door closed with his hip, a can of water in his hands and scowl on his face directed at Hoseok’s cheeky grin. Turning his attention back to y/n his face did a complete 180, lighting up in a friendly smile again. He held the aluminum can out for her to grab, and she reached for it with grateful shaky hands, cracking the top open to take a large swig of the cool liquid.
“Sorry about him Ms. Wörner, you know how he can get.”
“Please, call me Y/n-don't be a complete stranger.” and “I didn’t do anything to her!” were spoken over one another.
“Oh yeah? What happened then? Did some other fool talk her ear off for 3 hours?”
Y/n couldn’t stop herself from nearly choking on her water as she fought back a laugh at the two. The combination of their familiar banter and the refreshing water pulling her back into a more relaxed state.
“No.” Hoseok plucked a piece of invisible lint from Seokjin’s red jacket. “She tripped.” Seokjin slapped his hands away again, before eyeing him suspiciously.
“She tripped?” He straightened his coat off instinctually after he pried Hoseok’s fingers from fiddling with it.
“Yes. She tripped.”
They seemed to engage in some sort of silent conversation, their eyes following each other as they flickered back and forth to her and the front door behind her. Seokjin relented with a sigh, and turned to Y/n his smile on his lips yet again.
“Well, I’m sorry to hear about that. Be sure to watch your step in the future, we don’t need anything happening to you during your first time back.” He turned to his computer screen for a moment, before moving around to exit the lobby desk. “Let me show you to your room.”
“I can handle that-” Hoseoks smug smile was wiped off his face by a stern glare from Seokjin. He raised his hands up and surrendered the lead to Seokjin.
He led the three of them up one of the dual staircases that led to the second half of the lobby ecasing both sides of the front desk, each step feeling more familiar than the last. Once at the top, she saw the convenience store and gift shop to her right, and next to that their small cafe-The Edelweis-with its white floral logo lit up but the seats mostly empty. To her left was a barrelled ceiling hall identical to the one on the level below them, only this one had restrooms lining the left side wall, and a wide red carpeted hallway that led to the right and straight to the Adelaide. She could faintly hear the smooth floating trumpet of a Kitty Kallen song serenading its patrons, and the aroma of the extravagant and diverse menu making her stomach grumble in interest. She’d be sure to stop in tonight if she had time, her mouth practically watering at the thought of freshly made pasta, birria-inspired pot roast, and rustic French bread with their signature gochujang, honey, and herb butter. A melting pot of a restaurant that stands as a physical embodiment of all the different people whose hands helped maintain the hotel to what it is today.
Seokjin had his hands clasped comfortably behind him as he walking, keeping his back straight. Y/n took this time to inspect his new look: His dark hair not too short but not too long, kept neat and out of his eyes under his cap. His shoulders had widened, and his jaw grew into that which made his face look older and more mature- the last of his boyishness gone in everything except the jovial glow in his eyes. The three of them traversed in silence. Well-what was silence until Hoseok got fidgety.
“I can’t wait for you to see the estate’s new look. They updated the color so it’s no longer the old dingey red that's in the main hotel. It practically looks like a new building.”
Seokjin gave a weary look between the two of them, but didn’t comment. He just continued to lead them down one of the side halls on either side of the main elevator, and out into the open square courtyard that the two arms of the back of the hotel wrapped around. Y/n nearly tripped over her own feet to keep pace with how fast he seemed to walk across the cobblestone. Weaving expertly around the small flower garden and seating area where a few guests were lounging about, enjoying the gentle babble of the water fountain. He nodded politely to them and tipped his hat, which they returned. With swift steps they made it out of the courtyard and up the gravel path to the Estate house. Stopping at the navy blue and gold embellished doors, he pulled out a key from his pocket and slid it in the keyhole. If Y/n didn’t know any better, he seemed to be on edge- stuck in a conundrum of being in a rush yet somehow also reluctant to open the door. But as for why she couldn’t quite piece together.
The doors swung open and her breath caught in her throat. She had found her answer.
What used to be the old dated, red wallpaper, was now a soft sky blue- brightening up the white molding and making the golden details shine. The wooden floors had been repolished, and a dark blue antique patterned rug ran through the main hall and disappeared into the rest of the downstairs. Everything was fresh, bright, rich, and confronting. Just like she had drawn out when she was a teenager.
The thought made her both swell with pride, and awakened a dormant rage. Forcing those feelings away she followed their steps, past the large dining room to her left and the study to her right. With each doorway she passed, she could see snippets of the new designs-her designs-sticking to the blue tones and gold embellishments. A nod to the Wörner heritage, and to the tea set brought to the United States by Namjoon’s and Seokjin’s fourth great grandfather that had a permanent home in their dining room display cabinet. Its grayish blue accented cups and saucers are a symbol of the symbiotic relationship between the two families that had been going strong for nearly a century.
Making their way up the grand staircase to the landing, she saw her bags resting on one of two navy plush armchairs. The elegant blue from below continued up throughout the landing and down both halls on either side of her, perfectly complementing the oil-painted mural of wispy clouds and classically painted figures draped across the landing’s ceiling.
“So, what do you think? Nice right?” Hoseok did a small whistle and a turn. “Makes it feel so much brighter and less like The Haunted Mansion with all of those deep moody reds.”
Seokjin stood quietly, his head slightly down and his neck flushed. He probably knew that this had been her idea. Her design. With his parents being so involved in the affairs of the hotel and estate, they would know everything, and subsequently so would he. Hoseok remained oblivious to the awkward energy in the room, so Y/n plastered a smile on her face in order to save everyone from the lingering discomfort.
“It really does. Just makes it more inviting.” She managed to get the words out without sounding too forced, a feat she had to pat herself on the back for. Tearing her eyes away from the walls to look at the two of them, she could practically feel Seokjin’s shoulder’s relax as he bounced to pick up her bags with two hands.
“Your room has remained mostly untouched at your parent’s request. I’m sure you can change that though if you wanted to.” Seokjin smiled. Y/n realized as she watched him stand still, that he was probably waiting for her to lead the way to her room. Muscle memory led her there-down the hall on the right-hand side of the split landing to follow the bend to the left all the way to the back corner room.
She could hear their soft footsteps behind her, so she knew she didn’t have time to freeze up now. Gripping the bronze worn doorknob with vigor, she pushed open the door with a bit more force than she had meant to, causing the door to bounce off the door stopper before coming to a slow stop at an angle.
“Geez, what’d that door do to you?” Hoseok remarked, earning a stiff elbow in the ribs from Seokjin.
Ignoring the two of them, she stepped into her old room. It was exactly as she remembered it. The golden bed frame wound with battery operated lights from her highschool years, her comforter a natural forest green, complemented by an array of burnt orange and white leaf patterned pillows. The walls a sage green botanical wallpaper, peppered with photos from her childhood and highschool. Kicking a flipped corner of her patterned woven rug out, she took a slow lap around the room, stopping to run her hands over the calendar, 4 years out of date, still open to December. On the 25th box were a few doodles of trees and cookies she had done in a tipsy haze the night of Christmas eve. Seokjin cleared his throat, startling her.
“Where would you like me to set these?”
“Oh! You can just toss those on the bed. Thanks.” she gestured absent mildly in the direction of the bed.
He did as he was told, while Hoseok just leaned against the doorframe, glancing around the room seemingly lost in thought.
“Dinner in the estate is still served at 7:30, so you have a bit of time to get settled if you’d like to join us. You don’t have to eat here, you can always go to the Adelaide or wherever you’d like. But I’m sure your parents are looking forward to seeing you tonight.” Seokjin bowed gently, and began to retreat. Without thinking, Y/n walked over and put a hand on his arm.
“Thanks, Jin. I really appreciate everything today. I missed you all.” Y/n met his eyes, hoping to convey her sincerity.
“No problem Ms. Wör-”
Y/n cut him off with a playful groan. “ Enough of that- you’re still my friend, no need for fancy titles or anything like that.”
His ears twinged pink as he gave her a shy nod and smile. The customer service persona was gone, and in front of her stood the sweet and quiet Seokjin she remembered as a kid.
“Great! I’ll see you at dinner then. 7:30?”
He fixed his coat again, and the confident persona took over once again.
“Of course you’ll see me there. You know me, always on time.” He gave her a small salute and passed Hoseok (who had been silently watching the exchange) giving him a curt nod as he left the room. Hoseok watched him go until he was out of sight, and turned back to face Y/n.
“You doing okay with all of this?” He asked, gesturing to her with his chin.
“Yeah I am. I should probably wash the bedding though, don’t you think? Four years of sitting in a dusty room probably has them feeling pretty stale.” Y/n laughed dismissively. She unzipped her bag and began to pull stuff out onto the stiff comforter.
“I didn’t just mean your room, but that’s good to hear. I can let the laundry service know for you on the way out.” She met his gaze again for a good long minute-waiting for him to crack a joke of some kind- but he didn’t.
“Oh.” She paused, trying to wrack her brain for a good response. How was she doing with all this? Honestly she couldn’t tell, her day had been a complete whirlwind so far. It was like something had drawn the curtains on her anxiety and emotions so she couldn’t feel them at the moment. If she really thought about it, she couldn’t put her finger on why she had been so nervous in the first place. Right now, she felt good in the estate-like she was supposed to be here. “I’m really not sure. I feel fine, I think…” She trailed off with a shrug.
He hummed in agreement, but he didn’t seem to buy it.
“Well if you need anything, I’m down the hall on the left side of the landing now.”
“Awww. We aren’t neighbors anymore?”
His smile came back again, and he laughed. “Oh don’t you wish.” He pushed himself up from the door frame and stretched his arms above his head until she heard something pop. “But fortunately for you, I’m Jungkook’s problem now.”
“Shucks, what am I ever going to do with all this peace and quiet.” Y/n snapped her fingers in feigned disappointment.
“Oh I don’t know about that, your new neighbor is a night owl so I’ve heard.” He began to saunter back out of the room with a teasing smile.
“Oh yeah? And who is that?” She stuck her head out of her doorway to peer at him as he made his way down the hall.
“Yoongi. He insisted on moving to this hall when he came back so I traded with him.”
_________________________________________
Hoseok was true to his word, the cleaning service showing up not 10 minutes after he had made his leave. Once she had thanked them profusely and handed them her linens, she made sure to waste all the time she could by puttering about her room and giving it a gentle face lift, doing anything to keep her mind occupied and away from both her parents and whatever the fuck she had experienced out front. Removing the outdated calendar was first, then putting away all her belongings in color order (multiple times), before tucking her bags beneath the bed-which is where she was in the process of doing now- seated on the floor with her bags folded over her knees, and head tilted in confusion. She had lifted the bed skirt up to shove the bags under there to be forgotten indefinitely, when something being in her way stopped her in her tracks.
There, centered under her bed, was a small wooden box that was sure she hadn’t left in that spot. It was her old childhood jewelry box, one of which she purposefully avoided taking with her. With trembling hands, she pulled it out and unlatched the lid.
Laying inside the velvet lined side right where she had left them, were all of the pictures she owned that had anything to do with her younger sister. She picked up the first one and held it up to look at it more closely, even though she knew that she shouldn’t.
Three girls, close in age and wearing a set of matching dresses only differing in color, were lined up on the front porch of the hotel, the front lawn behind them was flourishing with flora and littered with toys. The photographer-she thinks it had been Mrs. Jung- had to have been standing in the open doors of the lobby when it was taken. Posing obediently on the right-hand side was Amelia, the eldest, wearing a large toothy grin and one arm tossed awkwardly over Y/n’s bent form. The 4-year-old Y/n in the photo had her arms wound tightly around the youngest in the photo, Matilda. Matilda’s small hands were clasped around a stuffed horse, and she was sporting the signature awkward and messy grin of a nearly 3-year-old toddler.
Y/n felt her throat tighten as she held up the next photo: the one of Matilda’s last Christmas. No one in the photo had known that at the time of course-so the photo did not reflect the mood it now elicited from most onlookers.
It was teeming with the unbridled joy of over a dozen children posed in front of that year’s lavishly decorated tree, all of them buzzing with impatience to open the overflowing pile of presents spilling into the bottom edge of the photo. She could recognize the faces of a few of both her own distant cousins that had joined in the festivities that year speckled in between her sisters, and the boys who lived in the house, and Hoseok's sister. She spied Hoseok's wild boyish grin standing next to herself, his eyes looking sideways instead of at the camera. Jimin was posed sweetly, sitting sandwiched in the front on the floor between young Jungkook and a boy she didn’t really recognize. One of Jin and Namjoon’s cousin’s who had come to visit for the holidays on occasion? Or perhaps Taehyung, the boy Hoseok mentioned earlier... She wasn’t entirely sure.
Her eyes slid to the Kim boys standing politely off to the right with Amelia. She only just caught Yoongi’s head poking up over Namjoon's shoulder, a small forced smile on his face the most he was able to do for a photo he had adamently detested being in.
Y/n traced Matilda’s small face with the tip of her finger, her arms spread out above her head as she mimicked the star on top of the tree. Clearing her throat of the ball that had formed there, she shoved both photos back in the box, her eyes just catching the photo of a newborn Matilda draped across her own small lap before she shut the lid and slid the clasp back in place.
She only had a few minutes before she had to make an appearance at dinner, and she wasn’t about to go in looking like a blubbering mess.
Shaking her shoulders out and pinching her cheeks, she shoved her folded bags beneath her bed and rose to her feet with the box in hand. Walking over to the large closet, she opened the door and popped the box on the top shelf, promptly shutting the door on both it and the feelings it had dug up. Closing her eyes, she took a few deep breaths before walking into the small ensuite bathroom to freshen her hair and splash cool water on her face. Looking at her own reflection, she tried to give herself a pep talk.
“It’s just dinner. You can do this. If all else fails, just eat in silence and leave early-but you have to go.” She moved to leave the room but paused, giving heself a stern pointed finger through the reflection. "And keep it together tonight. No matter what happens, don't flip the table."
Giving herself one more affirming nod, she stood up straight and left her bathroom. She grabbed her phone from where she had discarded it on the bare mattress and tucked it into her pocket while she slipped from her room.
Her path was illuminated by golden wall sconces, making it easy to retrace the steps she had taken earlier- not like she couldn’t walk through these halls blind folded if she had to. The distant chatter emitting from the dining room grew louder with each step, causing a nervous burn to bubble up into her throat at the impending reunion.
Stepping quietly up to the archway, she lingered outside the propped doors and peeking around the frame. Her parents weren’t in their seats yet, which made her release a breath she didn’t realize she had been holding at the brief respite the universe had given her.
The table was donned in a clean blue tablecloth and gold embellished napkins and plates, a glass of chilled white wine at each seat. Hoseok was seated on the opposite side of the table from the door, his glass pinched between a few fingers and leaning heavily onto Namjoon’s shoulder, laughing at something on his phone. Namjoon was also smiling, his dimples on display for all to see. He looked about the same as she remembered- cropped brown hair still damp from a shower, strong yet soft face, and taller than the rest of them. The only thing that seemed different was that his shoulders had almost doubled in width, probably from lugging around wheelbarrows and sacks of soil and compost all day.
To his left was who she had to assume was Jungkook, judging by his rounded eyes and nose. He had her doing a double-take: His hair was much longer than he had kept it when they were younger, and fell in waves down to his cheeks and down the back of his neck. He had also seemingly bulked up like Namjoon, and grown another 3 inches in height since they had last spoken.
The remaining seats were empty. No sight of the Seokjin or the rest of them anywhere.
Hoseok must’ve felt her nerves leaching from her form, as his eyes suddenly met hers from across the room causing his eyes to light up and a sly smile to break across his face.
“Oh Y/N! Come sit near me.” He flailed his hand wildly, attempting to beckon her over to join in on the fun.
Namjoon’s eyes shot up from his phone to connect with hers, and he put his phone into his pocket and came to a clumsy stand.
“Y/N.” His dimpled smile was overtaken by shock, as he came around the table to pull her into one of his signature bear hugs.
“H-hey.” Her response was muffled by his sweater as he crushed her to his chest. She could hear Hoseok giggling at her awkwardness and it made her cheeks flush with embarrassment.
Namjoon released her from the hug and ruffled her hair affectionately. “It’s good to see you again. I didn’t know you were coming back.”
Y/n laughed uncomfortably and fiddled with the edge of her sweater. “I mean, technically I didn’t either until this morning.”
He gave her a quizzical look but seemed to go with not asking any questions for now, instead moving to the side so she could wave in Jungkook’s direction.
“Hi, Jungkook.”
His eyes gave her a once over before flickering down to play with the frayed edges of his placemat. “Hi.”
“Oh Jungkook, don’t be shy! She’s just as weird and annoying as she always was.” Hoseok chirped from his seat.
Y/n let out a defiant sound. “I am not! You said yourself earlier today that I could never be annoying.”
Jungkook's eyes flickered between the two of them, and let a small smile grace his features.
“Who, me? I’d never say something so preposterous.” Hoseok held a hand to his chest in mock offense.
“Preposterous? That’s a big word for you.” Namjoon chimed in, scoffing while he plopped into his seat with a humored scrunch of his face.
Y/n laughed at Hoseoks sputtered defense, the way they fell back into a comfortable banter eased the ice settling over her skin at the impending arrival of her parents and reminded her of the things she had missed from home and hadn't let herself dwell on for years.
She took a seat across from Namjoon, and slid her chair into place even if it made Hoseok send her a pout at her act of betrayal for not sitting with him. She felt content listening to Namjoon and Hoseok jesting with each other, and let her eyes wander through the royal blue and gold dining room to examine every inch of detail in the room. It filled her with pride to see what she had envisioned come to life, even if she was still mulling over the details of how it came to be. During their journey around the room, her eyes found Jungkook’s, who had been stealing sideways glances at her from his seat since she’d sat down. He quickly averted his eyes, pretending he had been looking at something over her shoulder instead. Or at least, she had thought he was pretending.
“Do you like the updated design? I’m a bit bummed that I missed getting to show you myself.” Her mother’s voice sounded from behind her.
She whirled sharply to take her in-and it made her heart squeeze. People don’t talk about the hard parts of not talking to a family member. Everyone likes to talk about the part where they don’t miss them anymore, or when they couldn’t care less about a triumphant praise of their past self's decision making. But they don’t talk about the years you miss out on or the collateral damage of losing connections with those in shared circles- her mother's face carrying just a couple of new wrinkles that weren’t as prominent before a a glaring piece of evidence to the years missed between them. Four years of laughter that etched her laugh lines deeper into her cheeks, or smiles that left permanent crinkles in her eyes that she didn’t get to see.
Y/n clambered to her feet, and she felt her mother’s eyes following her every movement.
“I do. They look just as lovely as I’d have imagined.” Y/n managed to force the syllables off her tongue in what she assumed sounded genuine, but she couldn’t tell if her mother saw right through her or not like she used to.
“I’m glad.” She tilted her head to gaze around the room. “Your father spared no expense to match it to your descriptions as best he could.” She took a tentative step closer, and that’s when Y/n recognized something she didn’t expect: Her mother, Mariah Wörner-one of the most confident, intelligent and strongest women she had ever known-was just as nervous as she was. The way her fingers held onto her own elbows from where her forearms crossed in front of her like a lifeline gave it away. She had expected her to be angry. Hysterical. Enraged. Disappointed. Or even some combination of any of those to take hold of her and spit out insults in fiery waves into her skin or stare daggers into her spine. But instead, her mothers eyes were shaky and uncertain. Scared.
Y/n didn’t know how to answer her, and floundered for a moment in the sudden silence that enveloped the room. The men seemingly distracted by their own devices, trying hard to not look like they were paying attention.
“Your father is cooking tonight, he insisted that he make something for you on your first night back.” Her mother floated over to her usual seat towards the end of the table, and nervously shuffled into her seat.
“Oh that’s-” Y/n tried to reign in the sudden strong urge to cry, “That’s nice.” She melted back into her seat, feeling like her soul was floating outside of her body.
“Roland is at a friend's house until Monday. After this spring, we are looking at enrolling him in the same middle school you went to in Hershey. As such, he’s trying to soak up all the time he can with his friends.” Her mother let out a melodious laugh. “And you know me, I can’t ever say no to you guys.”
Her sentence hung heavily on Y/n’s consciousness. You didn’t have a problem with that the last time we spoke, Y/n thought to herself bitterly, but she held her tongue to keep it from slipping out.
Her mother occupied herself with unfolding her napkin and resting it on her lap. The silence lingered, the only sounds being the rustle of fabric as people shifted uncomfortably in their seat.
Y/n wanted nothing more than to both ask a million questions and reignite the argument where it left off, or to run into her mother’s arms and apologize for not giving them another chance to explain themselves. Her conflicting emotions felt overwhelming, feeding into her dissociation.
Her father burst through the doors separating the dining room from the kitchen, a handful of hot pads stacked in his hands. He looked tired, his brow furrowed as he scanned the room. He stopped looking around when he met Y/n’s eyes, and she saw his own harden in determination.
Here it comes. She thought to herself, bracing herself for him to start reprimanding her. He began to make his way towards her, tossing the hot pads on the table leaving Namjoon to frantically try to catch them before they slid into his chest.
Y/n began to stand up to greet him, but barely made it six inches off of her seat before her father wrapped his arms tightly around her shoulders. He smelt of butter, garlic, and spices as he held her tightly to his chest- it’s as if he thought the moment he let go she would run.
It took her a moment to realize that he was hugging her, not holding her hostage. Y/n let her arms robotically wind their way loosely around her father's back, not fully conscious of her own movements. For a moment she wondered if she had fallen asleep upstairs and that this was all a dream, or if she had actually tripped out front and hit her head. He surely should be yelling at her by now. After a few seconds of silence he let go of her, and gripped her shoulders tightly in his hands.
“Dad- what’s-”
“I don’t care.” His voice was warm and firm.
“I don’t understand what you mean?” Y/ns hands grabbed at her father's to try and remove them. She began to feel self-conscious of the way everyone was looking at this open display of vulnerability. She tried to take his hands off of her shoulders to stop herself from crying at the closeness that she had missed.
“All of this-” He gestured a finger wildly between Y/n, her mother, and himself, “-I don’t care about that right now. I missed you. Let’s move that aside for tonight and just enjoy dinner, yeah?”
She felt her eyes burning, and swallowed to keep herself in check. She nodded.
Her father broke into a giddy smile, and he released her. “Toll!” He spun around and quickly made his way through the swinging door, disappearing with a faint “Wunderbar!”. Only for his head to pop out again not more than a second later, a stack of cork hot pads in his hands that he tossed onto the table with a flying arc. “Can you guys spread those out? I’m going to bring everything out here.” With that, his head disappeared into the kitchen again.
Namjoon began to pass the hot pads around and Jungkook stood up to help him evenly distribute them. Not thirty seconds had passed before her dad came back out-a large tray of German potato dumplings, Kartoffelklöße, and placed them in the center. He winked at her and walked briskly back to the kitchen to carry out an array of what Y/n recognized as some of her old favorites.
Crispy roasted brussel sprouts, honey garlic carrots, buttered corn, and pan seared chicken to go with the dumplings. When he placed the last tray, he sat at the head of the table closest to the kitchen, practically glowing with pride at the feast he had prepared. Her dad didn’t waste his time beginning to fill up his own plate, stacking dumplings and chicken on top of each ether with haste. He looked up at her when he noticed she wasn’t moving.
“Bitte, iss!” He gestured exuberantly to the display, and picked up his fork to shovel the first bite in.
The rest of the table began to help themselves, and Y/n followed suit. A more comfortable silence fell over the table now that everyone had distracted themselves with curating their own plates. They had made it into a few minutes of clanking silverware and the occasional clear of someone's throat without so much as a word. But Y/n didn't mind-it gave her plenty of time to dissociate even further from the reality she had naively thrown herself into.
“Will Jin be joining us?” Her mother broke the silence, glancing from her plate to Hoseok as she pushed a carrot around her plate.
Hoseok looked up from cutting his chicken, the shake of the table cloth near his bouncing leg being the only sign of nerves he let himself show.
“He was supposed to be, but Jimin roped him into dinner at the Adelaide. He has been trying to find someone to sit with him tonight so he’s not by himself, and after being turned down by Yoongi for the dozenth time he moved onto his next victim.” He shoveled another bite into his mouth quickly, hoping to avoid being the only one speaking.
“What about the others?” Y/n didn’t realize it was her own voice until she felt her mother’s gaze on the side of her face.
“Last I heard Yoongi was called for an urgent maintenance call about an hour ago, so who knows when he’ll be back.” He shrugged, and wiped his mouth with a napkin. “His parent’s have been back in Korea since the Lunar New Year. They’ve only been coming back for maybe 6 months of the year-if that. One of his cousins had twins last year so, more of a reason to keep visiting.” He paused to take a sip from his glass of his wine. “My folks are down at the Adelaide. They usually eat there for dinner anymore, or they drive to my sister’s place. Something about finally getting to enjoy the environment and not having to be the environment.”
Y/n nodded, trying to stay engaged with anything other than her confused state of mind at the moment. This is not how she expected her first interaction with her parents to go.
“My aunt and unc-Jin’s parents-Have been traveling mostly.” Namjoon piped in letting Hoseok have a break, reaching over to grab another dumpling. “They all but retired this past January, and have been trying to make the most of it together. Though they haven't officialy gone through the process to finalize it, and I personally think they are hanging on until this year is over. Mr. Jeon has been off teaching a semester or two up at MIT. He has been trying to convince the architecture professor to bring some students down here to come visit the hotel and estate-he likes to bounce ideas off of fresh minds.”
Y/n hummed in response, turning her attention to the flavors bouncing off of her tongue. She took a risk and snuck glances at both parents. They were exchanging their own private looks; her mother’s was worried, and her father’s was nothing short of elated. Her father’s hand rested gently atop her mother’s, his thumb drawing soothing circles onto he skin. She caught her father’s gaze and he grinned, his eyes crinkling just like she used to remember, if not even brighter.
She took another bite of corn to keep herself from crying.
_________________________________________
The rest of dinner was surprisingly uneventful. Her father had been true to his word, and avoided making dinner awkward, while also not acting like he was forcing positivity down everyone’s throats. His laughter was loud and genuine, and he always left discussion open for Y/n to contribute if she wanted to, and didn’t bat an eye if she didn’t. He was, in every sense of the word, beaming. It was as if the idea of her just being at the table with him again made his day. And that realization is what led her to where she is now - huddled damp in her towel on her freshly washed and made bed, sniffling away the last of her emotional breakdown in the shower. They had missed her. They had wanted her here. And she chose not to come back. A new wave of fresh tears built up in her eyes before she could stop them again, as her spiral started its cycle all over again.
Guilt. Hope. Anger. Calm. Over and over again.
She left because of them-what they had done was unforgivable in her eyes. But here they were, wanting to sew back together a rip they made. Should she not give them the chance?
Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock so soft on her door that she just brushed it off as the house settling itself. She refused to let herself linger on anything that might make her heart race, trying to keep her feet planted in reality-One paranormal experience was more than enough for her today.
It did light a fire under her to move, taking it as her sign to pull herself together by tossing on an oversized t-shirt and sleep shorts so she could curl up under the covers for the rest of the night and ignore everything in favor of sleep. Stopping by the cracked closet door to give it a gentle shove closed, and finished the last steps over to her bed. But just as she was pulling the comforter's edges down, she heard the knock again, cementing the sound as definitely not the house settling. Padding softly over to the door, she opened it just a crack to see who was interrupting her self-pitying time.
Her mother was standing there, shifting from one foot to the other. Her hair was pulled up and away like she had always done before bed, like she had intended to do the same thing as Y/n before she had found herself outside of her door.
“Are you…alright?” Y/n opened the door a bit more to get a better look at her. Her eyes were rimmed red, her face was weary and sagged from fatigue. They really must’ve had the same plans.
“May I come in?” Her mother’s eyes swung from left to right, checking over her shoulder for anyone that may be listening in. Y/n wordlessly moved the side and opened the door just wide enough to let her slip through. Her mother quickly turned to shut the door behind herself, and slid the lock into place. Once she heard the click of the door close, she let out a breath of relief before turning to face Y/n.
“We need to talk.” Her mother folded her arms over herself.
Y/n snorted. “Understatement of the century.”
“I’m being serious, Y/n.” This is truly the most nervous she had ever seen her mother, causing Y/N to reign herself in again with a sigh.
“Look mom, I’m really tired right now. I just want to go to bed. Can we talk about this another time?” Y/n tried to keep her tone even. She was just getting out of the angry phase of her cycle, she didn’t need it reignited.
“No, we have to discuss it now. It’s crucial.”
Y/n sighed and plopped onto the foot of her bed with a huff. She looked up at mother expectantly, waving her hand for her to continue. “Well, say what you need to say then.”
Her mother pinched her nose between her fingers. “Y/n, I didn't come here to fight. I came here to….” Her mother paused, choosing her next words carefully. “I came here to give you some advice.”
“Advice?” Y/n's eyebrow rose in disbelief.
“Yes.” Her mother pulled her silk robe closer around her form.
“And this couldn’t wait for tomorrow because…?”
Y/n watched as she exhaled sharply through her nose, a telltale sign that she was growing impatient. “I’m sure that you’ve missed all of your friends -and rightfully so- but it’d be in your best interest that you keep some distance between a select few of them.”
Y/n recoiled at her mother’s words, her own coming out before she could stop them. “Excuse me? And who would the ‘select few of them’ be?”
Her mother’s eyes met Y/n’s with authority, and her response was short and stern. “Yoongi.”
“Are you serious?” Y/n gaped at her in disbelief.
“Jungkook too.”
“I can’t believe you’re being serious right now.” Y/n shook her head, her rage beginning to bubble to the surface.
“Y/n please listen to me-”
“Oh yes, please! Share with the class just as to why I can’t talk to my friends.” Y/n gestured to the empty room .
“I…” Her mother’s face fell, as did her voice. “I can’t.”
Y/n could’ve heard a pin drop from the front door it was so silent.
“Get out.”
“Please, you have to just trust me-” Her mother began to plead with her.
“No. I don’t have to do anything. You said you didn’t want to argue, yet here you are. Making decisions for everyone else and not bothering to give anyone else your reasoning.”
“Y/n-”
“God, I was so stupid to think that maybe you had changed based off of one dinner. Nope. Now you're in my room, giving me orders and being secretive just like always.” Y/n’s voice began to rise in volume, and her mother took a cautious step towards the door.
“That is not true. I care about you. I love you! I’m just trying to protect you,” Her mother tried to reach for her, but Y/n side-stepped out of her reach.
“Protect me?! Protect me from what?” Y/n was so enraged, that her eyes began to water again much to her own embarrassment.
Her mother stared into her eyes, opening and closing her mouth repeatedly.
Y/n let out a dry laugh. “Let me guess, you can’t tell me.”
“You wouldn’t understand-”
“Bullshit. I would. You just don’t want to tell me.” Y/ns shoulders began to deflate.
“That is not true.” Her mother pointed her finger at Y/n with venom.
“Then tell me.”
“Why can’t you just listen to me, why must you always make this so difficult.” Her mother threw her hands up into the air in exasperation.
“ME? I’m the one being difficult?”
“Yes!” Her mother hissed out from her clenched teeth.
“You’re the one that sent the invitation to me!”
“That was your father’s idea- I wanted to-” Her mother started but Y/n cut her off again.
“Oh so you don’t want me here then?”
Her mother’s eyes were alight with fury. “That is not what I said. If you’d let me finish-”
“No, actually I think I’ve heard enough. This is fucking ridicu-”
“That is enough.” Mariah’s tone was cutting, and final. She stomped towards Y/n and gripped her upper arms in her long hands. “You will listen to me.” Y/n had never seen such rage in her mother’s eyes, not once. “Do not think that for one second turning you away all those years ago doesn’t haunt me, or that a single day went by where I didn’t think of you. You will do as I say, and you will not ask questions. I will not-” Her voice cracked, forcing her to pause. “I can not lose you again. I will not lose another child.”
The way her mother’s eyes bore into her own, and the way her hands gripped onto Y/n's shoulders with such desperation knocked the air out of her lungs. She was still angry, yes, but she couldn’t find it in herself to yell at her mother-not when she looked so vulnerable and small in front of her. Two words she’d have never used to describe her mother. Her mother’s hands released themselves from her shoulders, and she walked herself with dragging feet towards the door and unlocked it with a trembling hand.
“I can’t tell you what to do, you’re right. But please at least try to listen to trust me, if not even just a little.” Her tired eyes looked at Y/n over her shoulder with so much defeat, that slowly morphed into one that was resolute. Distant and cold. “Keep your door locked at night. And if you think you hear your father walking around the house during the night…” Her mother paused within the threshold, debating her next words. “Don’t get out of bed, and don’t, under any circumstances, open the door.”
