Hi friends. It's been a while. I know I've been absent and left many things unfinished. I'm going to be completely transparent here as to why I vanished. My cousin who was like my brother (12 days apart) passed away in 2016 of an OD.
Life got hard.
I literally found pleasure in nothing. I stopped talking. Working. Doing anything I loved. I stopped playing soccer and softball. Which is kind of ironic because my cousin was my biggest champion always telling me I was going to be in the World Cup. But it all felt not important because HE was GONE.
Basically, my heart was broken.
Life is never going to be the same without him but, I am learning how to move on. It's different. I think about him every single day. But I know deep down he would not want me to dwell. Maybe it seems trivial that I worry about unfinished FanFiction. But, my stories mean something to me and as a writer I can only hope the words I write mean something to someone.
I have started writing again. I found my spark. I hope that once I am ready to continue on I have the wonderful people (you) along for the ride with me.
(Just a bit of unofficial super rough draft of the Quinntana tale)
I never intended on publishing this story. I think in some ways, I had kept writing it for myself. Never planning on letting it be read by anyone other than myself. But, before I knew it, I had practically written a novel. I thought about sending it as is but, then decided against it. Not because of the memories or the pieces of my broken heart or the pain that I coud only see. But, because I wasn't sure I was ready.
I'm still not.
Before sending it out, what was formerly a work of non-fiction turned into fiction. My autobiographical account of our four years together turned into a semi autobiographical piece that I tailored into a story more suitable for the masses.
I changed our names, where we grew up and where we met again after high school. I kept myself a writer for story purposes and you a struggling musician trying to find yourself in the real world. I made Brittany a wanderer. A girl desperate to find her way in the world where ever the wind was to take her until she finally found you again. I guess that part stayed slightly true.
Against my editors best efforts, I didn't change you into a guy. I just couldn't. She was sure that this tale of 'sapphic love' between old friends coming together in a big city was not believable and would wind up on the $5.99 paperback table. But, I somehow got through to her that the story I had written was so much more than just girl-on-girl for the titliation of men and the curious, ignored housewife. That what I had was a journey of a young woman who had thought she had been lost, forgotten, unloved and unseen.
You saw me.
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(Also, I have been working on a soundtrack to go with the story)
Santana and Brittany have not been friends since they were single digits. But being forced to get a summer job at the town pool forces Santana to work side by side her ex-friend slash current bff's arch nemesis. After getting stuck in the storage closet one rainy day at the pool together everything changes.
I know most of you are probably wondering why I wouldn’t be posting an update to an already in progress piece. I understand. But I felt like posting this instead. Thank you.
Okay, teaser #2 was the winner. So,here's your first peek at part 3 of my skies series. Enjoy :)
"Oh, I like this one." Santana says and Quinn quickly comes up beside her to check it out.
"That is nice." Quinn runs her fingers over the fabric. Santana's eyes rake over the front, top to bottom, before turning it around and her expression changes instantly.
"Ugh. Never mind." She pushes the dress back into the pack of many others.
"What's wrong with it?" Quinn asks, a little confused.
"Too many buttons on the back." Santana waves at the now lost garment. "I don't want to spend my wedding night falling asleep as Brittany unclasps, unbuttons, unhooks or unties the back of my dress. I need something easily removable." Quinn laughs through her nose and shakes her head. Of course that would be at the top of her friend's list of priorities when it comes to her wedding dress. "A plunging back line would be preferred." Santana adds.
"Noted." Quinn literally types that into her phone where she's opened her notes to jot down anything and everything Santana requests today. "You could always ask Kurt to make your dress." She suggests.
"He's already doing Britt's." Santana tells her with a sigh and a shake of her head. "If Brittany Pierce is wearing a Kurt Hummel gown at her wedding then…" She looks up when Quinn's phone beeps, alerting her of a text message. "Is that Rachel?" Santana wonders. It's been months since they have seen let alone heard from Rachel Berry. Quinn shakes her head.
"Hey," Quinn puts her phone in her jacket. "It doesn't look like there's much of your style here. Let's go some place else." She suggests and Santana shrugs with a nod giving the place one last look around.
"Let's see what's next." Santana pulls out a piece of paper from her purse but Quinn takes it.
"I know where to go." She grabs Santana's hand and calls a taxi.
The five minute cab ride is spent with Quinn listening to Santana describe her perfect wedding dress. It has lace, but not too much, and it is flowy but tight and most definitely has no buttons. She cannot stress enough how against buttons and ties and anything that could trap her into the dress. She is so wrapped up in her rant on the annoyance of her never ending zippers that she almost doesn't realize they've stopped.
"Come on Bridezilla." Quinn jokes. Santana is mid huff when her eyes fall to the name on the window of the store front they are in front of.
"Q, this is my dream list. Did you look at the the wrong one again?" Santana groans and reaches into her bag to get her post-its.
"Just shut up and follow me." Quinn hooks her arm through Santana's and drags her inside.
"Welcome to Vera Wang New York." A young woman greets as soon as they walk in. "Name and time of appointment?"
"Hi, we don't have an appointment." Santana replies nervously.
"Yes, you do." Quinn smiles. "Lopez for two o'clock."
"What? I've been trying to make an appointment for months." Santana whisper shouts. As the woman behind the desk presses a few keys into the computer, smiles up at them and nods.
"Yes. Lopez." The woman grabs a few things from the desk before stepping out and waving for them to follow. "Please, come this way."
The woman leads them into the back where they get their own private fitting room, fixed with a bottle of champagne and fresh strawberries on a platter. She turns to Santana and hands her an envelope before walking away, telling them someone will be with them shortly.. Santana looks down and sees her name on the outside of the envelope and grows more curious because all of this just happened so fast. When she glances up at Quinn her friend is fiddling with her phone and grinning. Slowly, Santana pulls out the piece of paper from inside the envelope.
'A gift for my bride. Design your wedding dress my love. This is for the day your dreams come true and I want you to have your fairytale. Love, B'
"I'm gonna cry." Santana pouts and looks up, not even getting annoyed when she sees that Quinn is snapping pictures of her with her phone. "I am marrying the sweetest person on earth."
"No crying today." Quinn shakes her head, tosses her phone in her bag and grabs two glasses, pouring some champagne for them. "Cheers to your future with Britt."
