Hey there! Would you be able to do a post on 8th house sun synastry? I bet you’re getting lots of synastry asks, especially 8th house related, so I understand if you are busy or don’t wish to. Your posts are really good and detailed well. Thanks queen
Thank you so much for this kind message! My apologies for the delay let's get into it!
When the sun is in the 8th house in synastry, literally nothing will feel like a secret or private. The way that I've noticed this usually play out is that it's the house person who can't maintain privacy when they meet the sun person. This is because the sun wants to know everything about the house person and not only wants to know these things, but has a natural charm about them that gets this information out of the house person. There is an immediate closeness between the two people when they first meet, much like any 8H synastry.
What differs the sun in 8H synastry from the rest of 8H synastry is the abrasiveness from the Sun person. The only other similar energy is when Mars is in this house in synastry, but I'm using the word abrasive because it could feel very exposing and very intense, but sometimes even feel like a violation for the house person to take in the sun person. The Sun may not be an abrasive person, but they have a natural ability to really capture the house person's mind, body and soul in ways that truly feel like the house person is being compelled. It's giving.. Delena?
I tend to mostly focus on the house person's perspective because it does feel like the house person is always more affected by this, but it doesn't always have to be true so make sure when reading this article you flip it where it needs to go. I also get questions a lot about if it changes the perspective if X is the house person and Y is the sun person or if gender plays a role in things, and truly I think you should realize that gender plays a role in everything! But you should also see this analysis as it fits to your situation. The question of "who feels it more" when it comes to 8H synastry is a common one, but I think it's kind of invalidating because both people experience and intensity that is so unfamiliar to them, that it could feel life-changing for them. So I implore you to validate yourselves, your emotions, and your experiences while you read my posts about the 8th house /Synastry because who feels it more shouldn't really matter because what was felt, was felt by both parties. Anyways I'll get off my soapbox, back to my subject matter.
When the two of them first meet, it's usually during an exceptionally difficult time of crisis, and usually for the house person. This could be anything from the house person experiencing homelessness to losing a family member or somebody that they loved, losing a job etc. Usually when the house person meets the sun person, their life is more like a bad metaphor. They could feel like they've hit their personal rock bottom when they meet.
The sun person is also going through a transitional period in their life, but just from what I've observed, it feels more tied to their ego, emotions, and subconscious feelings. So for example, the sun person might have just recently had a psychotic breakdown or hospital stay before meeting the house person. Or, the sun person started going to therapy or started taking prescription medication to aid there new diagnoses, etc. The sun person could feel a significant internal change that sort of causes like an identity crisis and they don't feel like they know who they are when they meet the house person.
So when the two of these people meet, I think it's pretty fair to say that they don't really have a solid foundation when it comes to how they identify themselves. The sun person could definitely feel like a part of themselves is disconnected from who they want to be. They could definitely take on more of a lost soul kind of vibe, they could definitely be an avoidant type as well. The house person could feel like they don't have control of their lives when they first get involved with the sun person. Because both people are not very secure with themselves, they project onto one another, and those insecurities can grow into bigger problems with time. I think in ways, this sort of prompts the start of the misunderstanding between both people as well. Insecurities can lead to prejudgments about each other, and that could start problems. As I mentioned, this is a very passionate synastry because these two people just see each other. Sun person sees the "darkness" that the house person is trying to hide and this could be anything from like their insecurities, to their fears, to their past etc. To the Sun person, the house person literally can't hide anything from them and they don't want them to, so naturally the house person unravels and shows them sides of their personality that they've been gatekeeping. Similarly, the house person helps the sun person see themselves for who they truly are and who they truly can be, despite what they're going through at the moment that they meet. Remember I said that the sun person is usually dealing with low self-esteem, no self-confidence, low ego value etc when they meet. Having known the house person will really help boost the sun person's confidence because house person pretty much holds the sun person's hand into transformation.
I think that when two people can be extremely vulnerable with each other and about their situations and still feel like the other person cares about them, loves them, is loyal to them, values them, etc. I think that feeling could become very intoxicating, and addicting, and even more so when it's intertwined with 8H Sun synastry. This is because the 8th house rules intimacy as well, so these two people have grown so close to each other and so deeply intertwined that for them, they could feel like that feeling will never be found with anyone else.
Now unfortunately because this is the eighth house that we're talking about, we have to consider the fact that betrayal can happen. It's not always how things manifest, but if and when betrayal happens with this synastry, it is usually because one or both people in the connection feel like things are getting too intense, too quickly. Being this intimate with somebody could sound great to some but it could also sound terrifying to some. Usually with this dynamic, one of them or both of them become too scared to let their guard down and to show the other person who they really are. Sometimes these people take their offer of intimacy as some kind of threat and like they can't trust the other person. I even feel like in some cases, the two individuals don't trust each other based off of lies that they've either heard about each other like through the Grapevine, or delusions that they have created about each other. I feel that because the 8th house is traditionally ruled by water energy, emotions are very high with this dynamic, so people can emotionally gate keep when they don't feel safe and that can create illusions as well as deep distrust that is something that you can't come back from.
Betrayal does happen like I mentioned, it could literally be that they lie about who they are as a person. For instance, you can view this person — and it doesn't matter who we're talking about the dynamic — as somebody who is very nonchalant when you're with them or very stern, they might wear a mask around you, etc. But the more you know them, the more you see their real personality come out, and for them they might not feel very comfortable showing you that side. They might think that you will leave them behind if they show you who they really are inside. But also, somebody might just not want to give you the same level of intimacy you are willing to give them in this dynamic and I think that could also unravel the connection.
Now let's talk about obsession LMAO. I feel like if there is one placement in my opinion, that could definitely suggest obsession in synastry, it is this. I feel that the sun person is rather obsessed with the house person but this could be flipped as well. And this obsession sort of like starts right away and then just doesn't fully end? lol. I feel the sun person will try to hide their obsession over the house person for majority of the relationship until something triggers their jealousy and that is when the house person will fully experience the obsession of the sun person. To tell you the truth, this could be a little unsettling. I don't think that the vibe is the same as like Venus in the 8h Synastry where I guess the obsession could be painted as a little "sexy" lol.
I think that obsession here could take a bit of a creepier turn especially if things don't work out in the long run. The sun person could be stuck on the house person for a very long time and could monitor them from afar. For instance this is where you see a lot of like social media stalking, repetitive texting, texting from different numbers, stalking friends and family of the house person, etc. I think that this can get really crazy if there are bad aspects and other things to support that. But I also don't always think that it's a one-way street.
The house person, though they may move on from the connection, might feel more of a haunting effect from the Sun person throughout time being away from them. For instance, this could be that the house person will seemingly be living their life and then randomly get hit with a wave of emotion for the sun person, even if they haven't had a connection or talk for a long time. The house person definitely experiences more of a psychic haunting of the sun person and it could even feel like a psychic invasion or sort of like an invasion of your psyche when they think of them. I think the best way to sum up this experience would be that the house person is sort of left with residual hurt, pain, maybe even love? And they get stuck on those feelings to the point of obsession, or even when they move on, the sun person will randomly pop up in their thoughts and it could feel like it's out of their control.
For the sun person I feel they are definitely more aware of what they think and feel for the house person even after the connection ends. Obviously not everyone gets obsessed with the house person lol but if this is a situation it definitely is long-lasting.
Ultimately though, this is one of those connections that is just very hard to walk away from. This could be because the two of you have combined finances and are financially tied / obligated to one another, this could also be that one or both people use finances to bind them together so that they can't separate. I feel that people who have this synastry could also like only stick together because the sex is good and the connection lacks in every other department lmao. I feel like this is the synastry that really like binds people together over anything that would otherwise not keep you tied to somebody else. They seriously become the version of themselves that they don't recognize and that they don't like, especially in the most negative manifestation of this. They put up with a lot from each other, and they do things that are out of character towards one another, that they would otherwise not do with other people. They can give up a lot of personal power to one another and it could be due to codependency and wanting to play mind games but it could also just be that there is an intensity to this synastry. And if there are any more personal planets in your eighth House, this will just ramp up that energy.
In the best manifestation, these two people can make really good financial investments together and can build generational wealth together. Because of the strength of their intimacy and Trust in one another, they become each other's rocks, and business partners lol. There is mutual trust, and there is like a level of intimacy that will never be matched with anybody else. This is also a relationship that has a very high sex drive as like a theme of the connection, so I do feel and the best manifestation this is a very fulfilling relationship if you know what I mean. I see that money will be a problem or spending money on each other won't be a problem. It really doesn't matter who is who in the connection, somebody's getting spoiled! lol this is a connection that could have a dark and freaky side to it, bondage could be something that the two of them are into. Secrets are a strong theme that they trust each other with fully. It's sort of reminds me of Christian and Anastasia from Fifty shades of Grey. A very strong connection can be formed but it will take a lot of work for sure.
In the worst manifestation, this person will leave them worse off than they found them. I've seen this kind of synastry play out where one or both people just totally drive each other into financial debt when they're together, they make horrible choices. Both people could take jabs at one another especially in ways that could affect each other self-esteem. As I mentioned earlier in the post, intimacy requires a lot of vulnerability.. if and when things go bad, one of these individuals or both of them can totally use those intimate details against each other. The betrayal can come simply from the fact that they have shared too much with one another and then it is used against them. I feel like vindictiveness is a strong thing with this synastry when things are really bad.
Even when things are at they're very worst and the two people have hurt each other beyond repair, both parties or at least one of them, could feel the insistent need to hold on to one another. Again, when things are really bad, there is no more ego, it's just pure raw hurt, pain, anger, betrayal, and love combined. I think that it could be very toxic because both people have no boundaries with one another and they don't know how to stop hurting each other, even when they should have stopped long ago. Amy and Nick from Gone Girl is a good example of what this looks like and how loyalty, betrayal, and fixation in 8H Sun synastry can feel.
Ultimately though, I feel like this specific synastry is really meant to change both individuals and I feel it's for the better. This is a very karmic placement to have with somebody, and in a lot of ways I could feel like you are going through karmic tests when you are with them, and deeply woven into their lives. Look out for codependency, try not to lose self-agency when you're with them because when you are with them it could genuinely feel like the two of you are one person and that could lead to a lot of toxic behaviors and patterns in the future. The biggest challenge with this is to remember that you have agency and that you are your own person, well also deeply connecting with another.
