#sweetirony

[eric-sadahire]

My mom and I were walking our dogs and some guy whistled and yelled "hey sexy!" so I turned to my dog and said "did you hear that Duke? He thinks you're sexy!"

And my mom laughed so hard we had to stop walking.

[eric-sadahire]

Self-discipline is tough, because I’m the boss of me,

and the captain runs a real loose ship.

[eric-sadahire]

Being venomous would be so fucking cool, admit it.

*bites inside of my mouth* Oh fuck!

[eric-sadahire]

When the young husband reached home from the office he found his wife in tears. "Oh, John," she sobbed on his shoulder. "I had baked a lovely cake and put it out on the back porch for the frosting to dry and the dog ate it!" "Well, don't cry about it, sweetheart," he consoled, patting the pretty flushed cheek. "I know a guy who will give us another dog."

[eric-sadahire]

My neighbor is both a taxidermist and a veterinarian

He has a sign that says either way you get your dog back

[eric-sadahire]

I used to have the best hangover cure-

My trick was being 23

[jareddemarino]

Welcome to 🤡🌎🇺🇸 #TheTruthShallSetYouFree #TheTruthHurts #Pathetic #SorryNotSorry #SweetIrony #UnFuckingBelievable #FactsDontCareAboutYourFeelings (at Spook Rock) https://www.instagram.com/p/Clp-hqWA3E0h9I-JTpYrPhMr3kWbt-g7lJ9Mtg0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[jareddemarino]

Welcome to 🤡🌎🇺🇸 #TheTruthShallSetYouFree #TheTruthHurts #Hypocrisy #SweetIrony #NotMyNarrative #FactsDontCareAboutYourFeelings #SorryNotSorry #SoSad (at Spook Rock) https://www.instagram.com/p/CPPOx-hF4iy5ruFzM8ccLZwdNhzUcoBDorOjQU0/?utm_medium=tumblr