Learning Each Other's Personal Rules
Remy quickly learns the rules when it comes to Emile's cartoon hobbies and tangents. Not only that, but Emile soon learns the rules when it comes to Remy's love for Starbuck's Iced Latte.
And before Mushu can light a rocket, the boys end up in a vengeance-filled tickle fight.
This prompt was suggested by an anonymous user! So whoever you are, I hope this fanfic is to your liking. (also I hope you don't mind that I sprinkled in some Patton.)
Emile had been going on cartoon tangents for hours. He wouldn’t stop talking. Every single conversation about cartoons led to a moment that reminded him of another cartoon he loved. Steven Universe, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Gravity Falls, Mickey Mouse, Pokemon, Disney films, Rugrats, even CatDog came up at some point!
Patton had been listening intently, while Remy looked like he was gonna fall asleep from boredom. The poor guy was going through a caffeine crash and couldn’t keep himself awake. Even if he could, Remy would soon start mentally complaining and consider just leaving the room. He knew that Emile was into cartoons, but this was getting ridiculous.
Patton quickly elbowed Remy in the side to get him to wake up. Unfortunately for Remy, this worked enough to wake him up. “Hmmmmm? Huh? What’re we talkin’ about? Remy asked.
Patton frowned at him. “You’re falling asleep in the middle of a conversation. It’s rude!” Patton whispered to him.
Emile giggled. “Patty, the entire Sanders Sides fandom can hear you.” He told him.
Patton blinked and looked at him, feeling bad. “Sorry.”
“Naaah, it’s okay! I’m just happy to see I got half of the audience’ interest.” Emile admitted.
Patton giggled while Remy smiled a little at the destruction of the 4th wall.
“Besides: I need to start looking for new cartoons.” Emile told them.
Remy chuckled at that and drank some more of his latte.
Emile turned to look at him. “What?” Emile replied.
Remy shook his head. “Noooothin’.” He replied.
“No, what? You’re keeping secrets from me.” Emile asked.
Remy’s mouth morphed into a smirk as he tried not to laugh. “Nohothing!”
Emile huffed. “Tell. Me. The truth.” Emile ordered, leaning closer and closer to him with narrowed eyes.
Remy looked at Emile with an eyebrow raised and removed the straw from his mouth. “I think my bunny slippers ran for cover.” He told him in the Mushu voice.
“HEY!” Emile pushed him away and pouted, making Remy burst out laughing. “Don’t you mushu me!” Emile warned.
“Down bessie.” Remy said next.
“Okay, that’s it!” Emile grabbed Remy’s latte and placed it onto a nearby table, before tackling him down onto the couch. “Dishonor! Dishonor on your whole family!” He looked at the latte. “Take a note of this.” He pointed both his hands at Remy. “Dishonor on YOU, Dishonor on ya COW!”
Remy just bursted out laughing at him. “YOHOHOHOU BAHARELY HAVE THE ACCENT DOHOHOWN!”
Emile scoffed and shrunk himself down with a pouty face. “It’s a hard accent to interpret.”
Remy just laughed harder at that! “NOHOHO IHIHIT’S NAHAHAT! IHIT’S SOHOHO EHEASY!”
Emile narrowed his eyes at him. How dare!
But quickly, Emile’s anger turned to mischief as a smirk grew on his lips. “Well since you’re already laughing...” Emile shoved his hands under Remy’s black jacket and started drumming his fingers on the guy’s ribs. “You minus well have a proper reason!”
“NOOOHOHOHOHO! NOHOHO TIHIHICKLIHIHIHING!” Remy protested, squirming around and pushing at his chest.
“Well, I think the tickling is justified! It would make me feel much better being laughed at while being tickled, than being laughed at for failing a Mushu accent.” Emile admitted.
“STAHAHAHAP! THIHIHIS IHIHIS UHUHUHUNNECESsSsSAHAHARY!” Remy argued, finally grabbing Emile’s wrists.
“Oh really?” Emile asked, his hands now bound in Remy’s hands.
“Yehehes!” Remy started to calm down.
“If tickles are unnecessary, then THIS-!” Emile spread his arms out to the side and leaned in, blowing a raspberry on his belly. “-must be AbSoLuTeLy PoInTLeSs!” Emile lifted his head up and said.
Remy threw his head back and started laughing and cackling while kicking his feet. “BUHUHUT IT IHIHIHIS!” Remy argued.
“If it’s so pointless, then why are you enjoying it?” Emile asked as he stopped tickling him.
Remy started to slowly calm down, and looked up at Emile. “Oh, now you've done it!” Remy quickly squeezed Emile’s knee to catch him off guard, and went for his hips immediately after.
“OHO NO! REMY! NAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! OHOKAHAHAY, IHIHI’M SAHAHARRYHYHYHY!” Emile bursted out, bucking his hips and falling backwards onto his butt.
“Woooow! You really can’t handle that much tickling?” Remy asked, still drilling at the sensitive spots.
“IHIHIHI CAHAHAHAN’T!” Emile yelled back.
“Could it possibly be, that you’re not tickled enough to get used to it?” Remy asked curiously.
“IHIHI- OHOHOHOKAHAHAY, MAHAHAYBEHEHEHE...” Emile considered.
“Alright.” Remy stopped tickling and let him breath for a few moments. “Would you rather I took things slow for you?” Remy asked.
Emile bit his lips and nodded. “Mm hmm…Yes please.”
Remy smirked. “I hate to break it to you, but you’re not getting off lightly.” Remy grabbed onto Emile’s leg and started tickling behind the knee. Emile squealed like a toddler and started kicking his other foot. “OHOHO MYHYHYHY GAHAHAHASH! IHIHIT TIHIHICKLEHEHES, REHEHEMHMYHYHY!” Emile laughed.
“It does, huh? I was starting to think it didn’t tickle with how much you were laughing at me.” Remy teased.
“DOHOHON’T YOHOHOU GEHEHET SMAHART WITH MEHEHE, MIHISTER!” Emile warned.
“Or what? You’ll laugh to death? Leave me to clean up your mess? Make me seem like the imposter? Newsflash: I may be sus, but I’m not the imposter.” Remy teased. “Ejection comes at a priiiiice~.” Remy sing-songed.
“YOHOHOU DOHON’T EVEN PLAHAY AMOHONG UHUHUS!” Emile yelled at him.
Remy gasped and placed a hand on his own chest. “Yes I do! Just not with you.” Remy added.
Patton gasped while Emile shook his head in Remy’s arms. “MEHEHEANIHIHIE!” Emile warned.
“Well fine!” Remy stopped tickling and crossed his arms. “Be like that then.”
Emile let out pants of exhaustion to get his oxygen levels back up. “Just...j-just you wait...Ihi’m...g...getting...revenge.” Emile warned as he struggled to lift himself up.
“Yeah yeah, just keep breathing.” Remy pushed his chest back down till his body hit the ground once again. Emile let out a light oof sound as his back made contact with the carpet.
Remy let him breathe for a bit and summoned a brand new iced latte. “Man! I missed this glorious stuff.” Remy admitted as he sucked back a big mouthful.
Emile looked up and frowned. “You have an addiction.” Emile admitted.
“Yeah I do~” Remy replied. “What else am I gonna use to wake me the hell up?”
“How about water?” Emile suggested.
Remy looked at Emile like he had 4 heads. “Nnno.” Remy rolled his eyes and kept on drinking the iced latte.
“You know that thing has over 150 mg of caffeine, right?” Emile added.
“Mhm! Only the best stuff contains caffeine in my book.” Remy admitted. “Besides: since when did you become a nutritionist?” Remy asked.
“Remy...I don’t need to be a nutritionist to tell you that your body’s too dependent on caffeine. You need to try and stop.” Emile told him.
“Back off, okay? Just because you’re a therapist, doesn’t mean you can mother me.” Remy told him.
“I’m not mothering you. I’m telling you as a counsellor to a patient...to find other foods and beverages that don’t have as much caffeine.” Emile told him calmly.
“Last time I checked: there are much worse drugs, steroids and beverages that I could be addicted to. So you need to chill and let me do me.” Remy suggested with some attitude.
“Fine.” Emile crossed his arms. “If you’re gonna be a sassy teenager about it, then I’ll treat you like one.” Emile took Remy’s latte out of his hand, placed it onto the table beside the other almost-finished latte, and tackled Remy onto the ground.
Remy let out an offended grunt. “How dare you take my precious! Get off me, and give it back right now!” Remy argued.
Emile smirked and skittered his fingers on Remy’s ribs once again.
“NO, NOHO! NOHOHOHOHOHO! YOHOHOU BIHIHIHITCH! IHIHIHI’M GOHOHONNA KIHIHIHILL YOHOHOHOHOU!” Remy threatened.
“We’ll see if Remy, the coffee addict of Florida-rama, can handle some tickles for that sassy attitude you gave me earlier.” Emile suggested.
Remy just laughed and wiggled, while shaking his head. “CUHUHUHUT IHIHIHIT OHOHOUHUT EHEHEM!” Remy ordered.
“Awww! Can poor Remy not handle de tickle tickle tickles?” Emile teased. “Would you rather I took things slow for you?” Emile asked, quoting Remy from earlier.
Remy shook his head. “IHIHI’M NAHAHAT AHA BAHAHABY, EHEM.” Remy protested.
Emile widened his eyes, stopped tickling him and summoned a paper. “I know you’re not a baby. You’re very much an adult.” Emile reacted, pointing to the age collumn on Thomas’s birth record. “But even adults need to take things slow sometimes.” Emile told him, unsummoning the birth record.
“Nahahat mehe. Ihihi’m a fahahast pehehersohon. Ihi lihihike the fahahast lahane!” Remy told him.
“Okay.” Emile took off Remy’s slippers and held Remy’s legs inside a headlock. “You asked for it!” Emile immediately started skittering his fingernails all over his feet.
Remy screamed and arched his back while holding his head in utter surprise at the intensity. “OHOHOHO FAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA-” Remy sat himself up and tried to reach Emile. “GEHEHET OHOHOVEHEHER HEHEHERE YOHOHOU AHAHAHASSHOHOHOLE!” Remy yelled at him.
Emile gasped and looked at him in pure offense. “How DARE you use that potty mouth of yours against me!” Emile yelled. “Looks like I’m gonna have to go for these tickle tickle ticklish little arches!” Emile teased as he started scratching rapidly right on the left foot’s arch.
Remy wheezed and flopped back onto the ground, wiggling and tugging everywhere to get free. Finally, he took in a breath and let out all the hysterical laughter that trapped itself a couple seconds prior. “STAHAHAHAHAHAP! STAHAHAPSTAHAPSTAHAHAPSTAHAHAP PLEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHASE!” Remy begged and pleaded.
Emile, feeling a little bad for the guy, finally decided to give him mercy. He stopped tickling his foot, but didn’t let go quite yet. “Do you give up?” Emile asked.
Remy took a moment or two to breathe heavily and get some oxygen into his lungs. His sunglasses had fallen off just minutes ago, and he was still dealing with a heavy case of after-giggles. But...to Emile’s (and even Remy’s) surprise, the man in the sunglasses shook his head! He was NOT giving up!
“N...No! I...will...n-never giveup!...Never...” Remy shot back.
Emile giggled and pulled back Remy’s toes. “Better have a will saved...Cause you might need it.” Emile smiled and started scratching under Remy’s SUPER sensitive toes.
“OHNO! OHOHOHO-NONONONO WAHAHAHAHAHAIT! OHOHOFF GETOFFME EHEHEHEHEMIHIHIHIHILYYYYYYYYY!” Remy SCREAMED!
“You giving up yet?” Emile asked.
“OHOHOKAHAHAY, OHOHOHOHOKAHAHAY! OHOHOKAHAY IGIVE! IHIHI GIHIHIHIVE!” Remy screamed and thrashed like his life depended on it to survive.
Emile couldn’t help but laugh at Remy’s rather swift surrender. The poor man had no clue just what he was going in for until it was too late. By now, Remy’s entire face and parts of his neck were red from exhaustion and the building body heat.
Emile grabbed Remy some water and handed him the glass. He could predict that his voice and his throat was probably sore and hoarse. Water was only a temporary solution, but it was meant to at least soothe his throat while he panted.
Remy drank all the water in a few quick chugs and let his breath out with hard panting to follow. “*huff*...*huff*...Th...thank...Thanks...thank you...Emile…” Remy said politely despite his breathing issue.
“You’re welcome. Sorry if I overdid it.” Emile apologized.
“It...it’s...alright. I...I for...forgive you.” Remy replied.
Emile smiled and handed him his sunglasses. “You might need these to see in the SuPeR bRiGhT rOoM.” Emile teased.
“Mm...Mmhm...Sobright. So...so bright.” Remy joked along with him.
Emile giggled and booped his snoot. Then, Remy and Emile both looked over at Patton, who was just watching from the couch with a big grin on his face and a bowl of popcorn in his hand.
“Having fun, Patton?” Emile asked.
Patton giggled. “This is more entertaining than Dr. Doofenschmirtz’s childhood.” Patton admitted.
Emile and Remy both burst out laughing at that.
And before they knew it, all three of the boys had started impersonating Dr. Doofenschmirtz’s voice and were quoting his backstories.
Perhaps cartoons really DID bring them together!