#tab talks

[tabfruit]

I’m tired, every interaction is so hard. I keep trying to do things anyway and I just feel like I’m wearing the skin of someone people recognize but I’m hollow inside.

[tabfruit]

If i see the word ‘quietly’ one more time I’m going to burrow to the center of the earth and destroy it from within.

[tabfruit]

I’ve been starting to have really intense anxiety about not being able to wake up on time for my weekend 6am shifts and it’s been leading me to pull weekly allnighters before working an 8hr shift.

Idk what to do but I’m exhausted.

[tabfruit]

Boxes love to say things like “DO NOT USE BLADE TO OPEN”.

too bad that doesnt mean anything :(

[tabfruit]

I wish i didnt feel this way still

[tabfruit]

Moments like this i actually wish for a therapist. But ive tried too many times and its just wasted money. I feel so broken and irredeemable as a human. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good. I want to be good.

[tabfruit]

Last night i dreamt tht I drove my car into a lake. I broke the window to get out. It was satisfying in a way, that I remembered what to do in a bad situation, and the structure was already in place for me to handle it.

If only life was like driving a car into a lake.

[tabfruit]

hmmm my biweekly gender crisis hath arrived

One day i should just say fuck it and see what happens

But I should rather think I will just experience continued distress or distraction