When the Match Burns Out || Open
No matter what anyone else said, he felt responsible. The events weighed heavily on Shizumaru and he felt a weight he couldn’t put into words, rest on his shoulders. It was self-absorbed to think he had the power to change everything. LISE had all the power here; it was foolish to challenge that. But still... but still. Surely there was something more he could’ve done, something more he should’ve done. Maybe if he had talked to Ji-Hyun a little more he would’ve known what was on her mind, he could’ve talked her out of it. Perhaps if he had roomed with Tsuneko or even kept a better eye on her she wouldn’t have been caught like that.
Tsuneko must’ve died in so much pain.
Ji-Hyun, too, what she did was wrong, but how could she deserve that?
She was a kid. They were all kids.
It didn’t help matters that his wound was getting worse. He had tried his best to cover it up but the harsh conditions continued to assault him. Bloodied sheets from the confinement centre bed he was on had been used and thrown underneath the bed. Moving would be difficult but he couldn’t show weakness, not now. Shizumaru frowns just thinking about it; now more than ever he needed to be strong. He couldn’t risk getting blood on Lotus’s veil, too. He would have to return that. Perhaps the new area would give him something to better tie his leg with. Until then, he had to exercise and do his best to keep his body in shape. He was wounded, yes, but that wasn’t going to stop him. It couldn’t. HE wouldn’t let it, even if that didn’t make sense. Besides, weren’t miracles possible if you tried hard enough? He had to believe that.
Rather than take the ski lift, he opted to take the hiking trail. When you walked long enough, you built up warmth. Besides, somehow the weather didn’t bother him very much; his skin was often quite cold to the touch. Perhaps he had lived somewhere like this before. The trail was grueling but Shizumaru found it to be therapeutic, a kind of self-punishing adventure. Mental assault after mental assault kept his brain busy. Be better. You need to be better. Get stronger or you can’t protect anyone.
Yes... he had to protect them. Even if they thought he was annoying or pushy. He couldn’t let anyone else die.
The map revealed something very promising indeed; there was a clinic in the area. He had abandoned his bandages before leaving, which, in retrospect, had been a very foolish idea. He makes his way inside and sighs, glancing around for anything he can use to properly treat his leg. How he’d gotten wounded in the first place was still a mystery but it hadn’t let him down too badly... at least, not yet. He kept up searching until he found the storeroom, and has a look through some of the shelves. A lot of things here could be useful... the bandages especially. The wound was still quite wide and raw. The marks around it almost seemed like... burn marks? He wasn’t sure. Staring at it didn’t make him remember it any better, either. Before anyone could interrupt him, he quickly redid the bandage, leaning on the door as a counter measure before deftly putting everything back.
Which was truly good timing as someone entered, just as he was putting the medical supplies back. Oh. Best to make this look as natural as possible. He may have been wounded before, yes, but if he could just make it seem like... an aesthetic... or something... it would prevent people from worrying! That was important.
“... You surprised me. Don’t worry, I was just checking on the supplies we have.”
