Okay, so I binge read the entirety of your DBHC au tag in two days (still working on the fics lol) but oh my GOD your Tango makes me sick to my stomach in the best way.
What if you were nobody, what if you were human in all the ways that didn’t matter. What if you were a crash test dummy given sentence, something designed to take the hits meant for someone else, a walking blast shield just alive enough to scream. What if you were always the second choice, always there to be convenient and helpful but never the priority. Abandoned by your friends, your world, Hell, the whole goddamn narrative can’t be bothered to remember you exist.
One of the most defining moments of your life and it isn’t even about You. There’s an axe in your back, rage in your throat, and it burns and burns and you can do nothing. You would have helped, you always help (always always always) but No. You howl at your friend, the traitor, but you’re screaming into the void because something is holding you back. And when you look at that something it can’t meet your gaze, but that’s Your eye in His socket, and what does that say about you?
What if you had to watch everyone else stumble through falling in love while your mechanical heart beats for someone who isn’t even in the same World as you, who you only get to see if you play the game that seems determined to kill you in ways you didn’t know you could die. What if you were a coal mine, deadly and dangerous and disposable the moment you were all used up.
What if you were angry.
What if you were scared and sad and so lonely it burned you alive? What if you felt rage that wanted to consume you, but no. Don’t feel that. You’re not allowed to feel that. You’re only allowed to scream if no one can hear you.
(You want to be angry. You hate being angry, you were born angry (you think, no one has bothered to ask how you deviated yet, and isn’t that just the cherry on top?), but don’t you have a right to be angry? Don’t you deserve a turn to feel?)
What if you were alone on the moon, so lonely it burned, because you were useful and helpful and despite everything you loved your friends with every ounce of your heart? And you burned, you burned because even on the moon, white as rabbit fur, you were made too well to die from something as peaceful as gardening with gunpowder. You burned, even as your body froze, even as the world abandoned you once again, and maybe you should have seen this coming. Maybe you were always meant to die alone.
What if you were alive. What if your name was Tango. What if none of that mattered.
(So, uh, that got away from me, sorry for the essay!! your work is too good, it’s driving me insane, I love it. Anyways, I hope this was at least mildly coherent and not too much, have a wonderful day!! :D)
HOOOOOOLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MOOLYYYYYYYY yeah okay