#tbh_uk

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

I feel like I'm getting dumber by the day. What happened to the intelligent girl I used to be?

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

I'm a complete failure, I never feel good enough, I'm not intelligent enough, pretty enough, creative enough, I'm pursuing an arts degree and I can't even draw. I can't do anything, I'm not good enough and I hate myself so so much. I'm a failure..

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

tbh i haven't got a job in 2 years, because i like painting and writing poetry instead

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

The only thing that keeps me going is what I have worked so hard for the past 5 years - the vision that I will follow my chosen career path... And yet despite what my tutors say that I am really good and born to be in the field, I can't shake the feeling that they either don't mean it or very soon they will figure out that I am not at all that bright.. Despite how well I do, every second of the day I feel I will eventually fail as I am just not enough... I don't fit in.. I am an imposter..

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

Everyone keeps telling me I work so hard but I know that all I ever do is spend time online. If I put my mind to it I could do all the work I spend my time complaining about, but I just can't find the energy, even though not doing it makes me panic.

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

“To be honest... I think I took acid too much and I don’t think I can ever be how I was before.” 

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

“To be honest... I try not to dwell on my failures as it gets me down!”

[tobehonest-tbh-blog]

I don't think I'm very intelligent but I try very hard to hide it. I'm ashamed of looking foolish in public as I find it hard to keep up with others.