#teaandbanjo

[seethemflying]

Yet another asoif question...in the books, Brienne is still searching for Sansa, with no clues yet. Is Sansa just a red herring? Or is Sansa going to be rescued and returned to Winterfell in time for a final battle? What do you think?

Hey @teaandbanjo!

To be honest, this is a question I change my mind on every other day.

The way I see it, there is build up for Sansa to be rescued by a party coming from outside the Vale. The Ashford Tourney Theory by @nobodysuspectsthebutterfly - which predicts people Sansa will be married/betrothed to - suggests she may be suggested as a match for (f)Aegon Targaryen. People heavily lean on this theory when trying to predict who Sansa will marry in the future. However, it is important to note that nobody ever won the Tourney at Ashford and nobody was every crowned Queen of Love and Beauty because it was interrupted by Dunk and the Trial of Seven (which Dunk won). Maybe that points to the idea that Sansa will be unmarried at the end, or at the very least the succession of unworthy husbands will be interrupted by a true knight. Brienne is a confirmed Dunk descendant and Sandor is a heavily suspected Dunk descendant, so one of them rescuing Sansa from her series on unhappy suitors is definitely a possibility.

One idea I have is that after the LSH battle, Brienne, Jaime, Pod and maybe Hyle will head to the Quiet Isle to recuperate. The Quiet Isle has already been built up as a place for healing, and Brienne has connections with the brothers. There they will run into the Elder Brother again, who will reveal whatever planhe has been cooking up there (I like the idea of a reconstituted Kingsguard based on actual knightly values, as the Elder Brother is growing his tonsure out and was a former knight). Our little band of knights will also team up with Sandor, and the five or six of them - Brienne, Jaime, Sandor, Pod, the Elder Brother, and maybe Hyle if he survives - will go out to fulfil a mission. I have several ideas for what this mission could be - one could be finding Rhaegar's true heir - but another is that they go and rescue Sansa from the Vale.

Another way I see it, is that Sansa the Tourney of the Winged Knights will go horribly wrong and someone (either Harry the Heir or Sweetrobin) will die depending on what the actual fuck Littlefinger's plan is. Shadrich of the Shady Glen could also throw a spanner in the works and attempt to kidnap Sansa (who he probably actually recognises). If there is some calamity at the Tourney, I don't see Sandor or Brienne neatly swooping in to save Sansa (and, tbh, I don't see HOW timeline-wise either of them can get to Sansa in time for the Tourney, seeing as Brienne is tied up with LSH and Sandor is gravedigging on the Quiet Isle). It therefore seems Sansa may stay in the Vale for quite some time as the Littlefinger plot plays out, until Team Quiet Isle turn up, and she slowly wins over the Vale.

*I have a very strong feeling that Sansa is going to win Lothor Brune - Littlefinger's right hand man - to her side over the course of TWOW, and it is her ability to win the hearts and minds of men like him that will give her the ace card over Littlefinger*.

And yet a third way I see it is that Brienne will not save Sansa at all but Arya. One prevalent theory is that, once she's done in Braavos, Arya will return to Westeros via the Riverlands and be the one who gives "mercy" to her mother, LSH. Arya then has the opportunity to meet up with Jaime and Brienne, who will have been very entangled with LSH during the course of TWOW. I think one of the reasons this might be is that, during her hunt for Sansa in AFFC, Brienne kept bumping into traces and rumours of Arya instead. This might point to what is happening in Brienne's arc in TWOW.

As for Sansa, I think it is pretty clear that she will end up killing Littlefinger (or ordering the killing of Littlefinger) in Winterfell. It has already been predicted by the Ghost of High Heart:

I dreamt of a maid at a feast with purple serpents in her hair, venom dripping from their fangs. And later I dreamt that maid again, slaying a savage giant in a castle built of snow. (ASOS, Arya VIII)

*The maid with the purple serpents refers to Sansa at Margaery and Joffrey's wedding wearing the poisonous hairnet. The same maid - Sansa - then slays a savage giant (House Baelish's coat of arms was originally the Titan of Braavos) in a castle built of snow (Winterfell).*

When Sansa will manage to do that I don't know, given that she will likely be tied up in the Vale for a while yet, but I do think the show was right in having Jon and Sansa be the first Stark siblings to reunite. As I think Jon will be King in the North in Winterfell by the end of TWOW, it might be possible that Jon and Sansa will reunite towards the end of TWOW.

[lewispandawrites]

Prompt for your "Valkyrie".AU. Brienne has a seat in the back of a conference room. Jaime is giving a presentation with a crap ton of power point slides. So, she gets to listen to him talking about "market penetration" and stuff for a while...

Only after writing it did I realise it didn't fit the setting you requested perfectly but I still hope you'll enjoy it!

Also on ao3.

The fic under the cut.

This was bad. This was very bad, not good at all.

Why had Brynden Tully and Arthur Dayne had to decide on a merger? 

Brienne, as a member of Tully’s team, was sitting now in the conference room, as far away from Mr Jaime Lannister, also known as GoldenLion, as she could. Thankfully, he was the most important member of Dayne’s team, so he sat directly opposite from Catelyn. Who was two persons away from Brienne.

At first, she tried to reason with herself. Why on Earth would Mr Jaime Lannister record audio porn? Surely, he had more important things to do and an array of other forms of entertainment. He could play golf, cricket, purchase sports cars, do anything more fitting to his position. But over the recent weeks she had become very well acquainted with GoldenLion’s voice, and it had to be him. GoldenLion had a great recording equipment (now Brienne knew exactly how he had been able to afford it) and the smooth voice that carried across the table could only be his.

Brienne thought she was doing quite alright. Even more than quite alright. She had mastered a completely blank face years before and she was putting that skill to a good use now. She was also sitting completely still in her seat, save for an occasional note written on her stack of files. No one seemed to be the wiser to her avoiding looking directly at Mr Lannister, let alone what she had been up to last night.

The worst thing was, not looking at him didn’t exactly help. GoldenLion had recorded a very, very good office fantasy, and back then Brienne had been foolish enough to imagine it taking place in this conference room  - where she had barely spent time and wouldn’t be distracted by the memories of it. Or blush every time she entered. But now she was sitting in the very same room with GoldenLion’s voice washing over her in person.

“You know well, Mrs Stark, that both Mr Blackfish and Mr Dayne have been considering external growth and since they know each other well, they decided a merger would be the best option.” Jaime’s voice brought her back from her inner battles and Brienne wished it hadn’t. She almost chuckled at the ‘external growth’.

“Hostile takeovers are also an option,” Catelyn replied. It was no surprise to anyone that she wasn't exactly favouring her uncle’s plans but her hands were tied. She was only here to represent him. 

“But coming together is a more pleasurable option.” Brienne could swear Mr Lannister purred those words, and judging by Jon’s sudden cough, she wasn’t mistaken.

“You seem to be taking pleasure in it,” he purred as her mouth pulled off of his cock, a line of saliva connecting the head to her mouth. His fingers were tangled in her hair and his stump raised her chin so she would be looking at him.

Brienne looked down to doodle a tree in her notebook.

“But takeovers are more common. We’ll have to prepare for being scrutinized.” Robb chimed in, trying to earn his five minutes in the spotlight.

“You seem to like this pair,” he said, hooking his finger into her panties. The sight of him, kneeling at her feet, had her mewling. His lips were so close to her sex that she felt every word he uttered. “I like them as well. You made all those beautiful sounds when I lick you through them.” Just to drive the point across, his tongue drew a line from her opening to her clit, his mouth very familiar with the shape of her. “But they do keep me from tasting you. Don’t you think we should rectify that?”

“With businesses of the same size, mergers run more smoothly,” Mr Lannister added to a point Mr Marbrand had made.

When they had been standing together before, she couldn’t help but think how he was almost as tall as her, a rare thing. Not only did Brienne usually tower over everyone with her 6’3” - she had been working exclusively with the Starks and Jon for much too long to remember what it was like to be around someone her own height.

But it didn’t matter, when he drove into her from behind as her torso was flat on the table. Or maybe it made all the difference, because his lips attached themselves to the nape of her neck, the languid kisses a stark contrast to the harsh snap of his hips. 

“Sweetling.” His breath tickled her skin. His fingers were working her clit mercilessly, rubbing her through her second orgasm. “That’s it. You’re such a good girl. One more, for me. Pretty please.”

Her walls clenched around nothing and this time she had to shift in her seat, regretting all the more her wandering thoughts when she felt the slick between her folds.

“We need more details on your market penetration strategy,” Catelyn asked, looking through the files already presented to them.

Brienne made the mistake of looking at Mr Lannister in that moment. His eyes were staring right at her, pinning her in place and making her feel like a deer caught in the headlines. He was in her yesterday, but also wasn’t. There was no logical way he could know, yet he kept looking at her, his eyes leaving hers to trace down her face and neck.

“Of course. But could I ask for a five minute break?” he asked, looking back at Catelyn. “This merger will take weeks anyway.”

“Yes. I think a break would do us good,” Catelyn agreed and Brienne heard Jon’s relieved sigh. They had been sitting there for much too long.

“Could we also open the window?” Jaime asked, standing up. The others followed him, with Jon even going as far as trying to discreetly stretch his legs while standing. Mrs Peckledon giggled at his antics and he blushed then shrugged. 

“I’m afraid not but I could ask someone to change the AC settings,” Robb replied.

Mr Marbrand stretched his arms above his head and asked Pia if she wanted anything to eat. “But it’s only five minutes. Four now,” she replied, anxious, and Brienne felt for her. She had been in her place. Maybe they could get a drink, once it was over. She wasn’t vain enough to think she could mentor her, as Catelyn had done for her, but sometimes talking about things made a difference.

“We’ll start again in fifteen minutes,” Catelyn told Mrs Peckledon then glanced at Addam to confirm this. 

“I might be running to mine after work, just to get some feeling back into my legs. Do you want something?” Jon asked.

“No, I’m alright,” Brienne replied then watched him go. And she was alright, or at least much, much better than she had been a moment ago. She needed to focus and not let her mind wander again, not in that direction. There was no way she would ever listen to his recordings again, she thought sadly. It would not only feel inappropriate but also extremely awkward, and might mess up with her work. She would have to make do with others, or maybe find someone new. It would do her sex life good, broadening her horizons. She should also make a trip to the bathroom before the break was over, because the slight slickness was making everything awkward.

“Hi. You look much better already.”

She hadn’t heard him move, too deep into her thoughts again, so she almost strained the muscles in her neck as her head snapped to look at him. He was standing next to her with a cup of water in his hand - a cup that was then brought closer to her. “Would you like some water?”

“Thank you,” Brienne replied, not knowing what else to do, and accepted the cup with a nod. “Mr Lannister,” she added quickly.

“Please, call me Jaime.” Of course, they had already introduced themselves before the meeting, and he had called her Brienne. Oh, she was making it even more awkward. “I wanted to check if you were okay. Forgive me for being so forward but you looked very flushed from across the room,” he explained awkwardly, shifting from one leg to another. “And forgive me for assuming-”

“No, it’s alright. Thank you. I’m much better now,” she cut in, thankful that he seemed as awkward as she was. Yet when he shot her a very charming, grateful smile, she began to question that assessment. 

“You made a really good point, about the name. I’ve been trying to bring it up with Arthur for a while now but he thinks it’s not important,” he started again after a moment of silence. Her traitorous brain was telling her he was trying to keep conversation going but she quickly shot it down. They were the only two people in the room now, so he was probably just trying to be polite and not really interested in her. Or he was trying to dig some info.

“Thank you,” she said, again. Then berated herself for it. “I hope this will go smoothly,” Brienne added, wanting to contribute more to their conversation.

Jaime replied with a grin. “Those things never do but I do believe a merge between those two will be the most pleasant one in history. I’m actually surprised why it didn’t happen sooner. But, maybe it was meant that way,” he added, not taking his eyes from her. 

[swordmaid]

AU for J and B...he's a fancy, high level concert pianist. She is his piano tuner, and can't figure out why his expensive, hand made, custom grand piano keeps going out of tune and getting stuck keys.

omg yes. he always somehow needs her to come in and check on his grand piano, even goading her to play for him sometimes bc he needs someone to play the same piece as him so ‘’’’he can see how good he actually is.’’’’’’’’ ALSO, there MUST be a piano duet scene alla corpse briene

[luthienebonyx]

You would write Brienne as a specialist in venomous Australian insects. Jaime is a photographer who wants to take pictures of them (the insects) in their natural habitat.

Okay, I like this a lot for several reasons, including that it would allow me to use the “Alternate Universe - Australia” tag again, and that always makes me cackle.

As for the pictures, look, they would be of more than just insects, for sure. There would be pictures of people (or maybe just pictures of insects with people *cough*Brienne*cough* caught unawares in the background) that would result in other people looking at them with regret/angst/longing leading to navel lint/self-realisation and, inevitably, character exploration via smut.

Fic premise ask

[dancinginthecenteroftheworld]

A prompt (if you haven't got enough of them already): Jamie and Brienne are roommates. If Jaime hasn't done laundry recently, sometimes he borrows her t-shirts or sweat pants or whatever. This time, however, Brienne has just been way too busy, and all her underwear is dirty.

Jaime borrows her clothes all the time. No matter how much Brienne yells at him for it. So borrowing Jaime’s clothes should, in theory, not be all that weird. After all, Brienne would have more clean clothes herself, if half her tee shirts and a good chunk of her sweat pants hadn’t disappeared into Jaime’s closet. 

It’s just the matter of which article of clothing Brienne needs that is giving her pause.

This is what happens when you work too many twelve hour days in a row. You run out of clean clothes. Brienne should have learned this lesson last election season, but apparently she hasn’t. 

And now her underwear drawer is empty, and while Brienne can justify re-wearing a sweater, jeans, even her dress pants, recycling dirty underwear is a bridge too far. 

She could go commando, a voice in her head suggests. The voice sounds a lot like Margaery, who would undoubtedly forgo underwear without a care. 

Brienne just can’t, though. The idea makes her feel so uncomfortable, and she knows with her luck, the one day in her life she skips underwear would be the day she gets in a car accident or tears her pants on set. 

So she’s in Jaime’s room, staring at his open dresser drawer while wrapped in a bath towel that barely goes past her hips, because all her extra large bath sheets have also somehow disappeared. 

Brienne is going to yell at Jaime next time she sees him, she really is. But right now the more pressing issues is finding underwear and making it to work in time for another long, exhausting day.

The rows of boxer briefs look somehow intimidating. Brienne tells herself it will be just like her usual boyshorts. And Jaime won’t even know, considering how little attention he pays to things like laundry. She can wash them when she finally gets around to doing her own clothes and slip them back in the drawer. 

Never mind that thinking about putting something Jaime has worn against his naked skin, against very personal areas of his naked skin, makes Brienne feel a little light-headed. 

Except that as soon as Brienne gathers the courage to step into a pair of black briefs and pull them up, the door to the room swings open behind her. She hears it, just like she hears the sharp intake of breath from Jaime. 

Brienne stares at the wall in front of her. Maybe if she doesn’t say anything, Jaime will just turn around go away and they can just pretend this never happened. 

Brienne is not that lucky. 

“Are you wearing my underwear?” Jaime’s voice sounds strained and Brienne is reminded that this is very much not a normal roommate thing to do. Especially when your roommate is a different gender. Especially when you haven’t asked.

“I”m sorry,” Brienne’s hand hovers over her hip, the other one clutching her towel tighter. She feels like she should take them off, but she also feels like that is an even worse idea. “I’m out of clean laundry and you always steal my clothes.”

“I don’t steal your underwear.” Jaime’s voice sounds closer. Brienne hunches in on herself, wondering if she can some how make herself small enough to slip by him unnoticed. 

“I’m sorry,” Brienne says again. She’s going to have to move. Which is a shame, because she really likes this apartment, it’s so close to work and has great light and she’s going to miss it a lot when she goes. “I shouldn’t have.”

“I didn’t say that.” Jaime’s voice is even closer, yet Brienne still jumps when he settles his hands over her hips. “Have you borrowed my underwear before?”

“No,” Brienne manages to get out, thankful that at least she can give a reasonable answer. 

“But you’re wearing it now.” Jaime’s breath is hot against Brienne’s neck.

Brienne nods, slightly and then feels Jaime’s forehead against her hair as he groans. Jaime’s hands flex on her hips. Brienne isn’t sure what’s going on. 

“Fuck, Brienne,” Jaime breathes. “Are you trying to kill me?”

Brienne’s voice has deserted her entirely and she just shakes her head. 

“I shouldn’t be jealous of a piece of fabric,” Jaime says and Brienne’s brain flat-lines momentarily because that doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. 

Jaime pulls her back against him and Brienne might not have ever felt a man’s cock before but there’s no mistaking what’s pressing up against her. She gasps despite herself and feels Jaime wrap one arm around her waist, pulling her tighter. 

“How come it gets to touch you?” Jaime mutters. “When I don’t?”

Brienne wonders if the buzzing in her ears is real or if this is all some strange hallucination. Maybe she’s actually lying on the floor of her room, half-conscious. 

“I don’t understand,” she finally gets out. 

“What’s to understand?” Jaime rocks his hips against her, nuzzles his nose against her neck. “You wearing my underwear is the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.”

“You haven’t seen it,” Brienne points out, before the sentence registers. Because she’s still got a towel on. And she’s pretty sure the door didn’t open until she was basically done pulling them on.

She hopes the door didn’t open until she was done. 

“Will you show me?” Jaime spins her around then, facing him and Brienne searches his face for a sign of what’s going on. It has to be a joke, it has to be, but Jaime’s eyes are dark as he stares at her, his lips parted and his breath coming slightly faster than usual. “It’s only fair.” 

His hands move to the edges of her towel as he talks, slow enough that Brienne could stop him if she wanted to. Even with one hand still clutching the top of the towel around her chest. She should stop him. 

Brienne doesn’t stop him, as Jaime pulls the edges of the towel apart and drops his gaze.

Brienne can’t help following where he looks, wonders what he’s seeing as he looks down, the front looser than she’s used to, her thick thighs making the legs fit with no problem. She hasn’t shaved, and there’s a fuzz of white blond hair scattered across her pale skin and stubborn freckles. 

The noise Jaime makes is not one Brienne imagined a man would ever make around her. 

“Fuck,” Jaime says, and keeps staring. 

“I have to go to work,” Brienne finally says, because she’s getting increasingly confused standing there. 

Increasingly aroused, too, and she hopes it isn’t noticeable. 

Jaime lets her go, and Brienne fixes her eyes at a spot over his shoulder as she starts to step around him. 

“I’ll give them back after I wash them,” she says, hoping to restore some sense of normalcy to this strange situation. Which can’t possibly mean what it seems like it means. “Or not. I can throw them out.”

“Give them back.” Jaime catches her wrist before she can get too far. “But Brienne?”

Brienne still doesn’t look at him, though she turns slightly to show she’s listening.

“Don’t wash them.”

[bussdowntarthiana]

A choice of prompts, or are they secret ingredients? Either venison (Seasonal and a little bit Mideval, but not really a thing for a pastry chef) or sesame seeds (the current mystery ingredient in my kitchen, which go into a lot of middle-eastern sweets). Have a great holiday!

Because you gave me an ingredient, here is a ficlet set in the same universe as Mise en Place~

“So, I may have made a mistake on this week’s order…” Jaime said sheepishly.

“Oh?”

“We have quite a bit of sesame seeds,” he said, gesturing to a comically large sack.

“I would say that is more than a bit,” Brienne laughed. “What are you going to do with them?”

Jaime pondered her question. “Tahini would be the best choice. It can be used in multiple dishes.”

Brienne’s brilliant eyes lit up. “Give me some when you’re done, and I’ll make us halvah.”

“Excellent idea, Tarth,” he smiled.

The sesame seeds were toasted in a wide, dry saucepan over medium heat. Jaime made sure to constantly stir them until the seeds slightly darkened in color and became delightfully fragrant.

Once toasted, the seeds were processed to a crumbling paste. Jaime added avocado oil to the sesame seeds and processed them together.  A tan, smooth cream resulted. After dipping a finger in the tahini to taste it, Jaime added a small amount of salt to bring out the flavor more.

He gave a quarter of the sauce to Brienne and stored the rest.

While Jaime was making the tahini, she lined a square baking pan with parchment paper and combined sugar, vanilla seeds, lemon zest and water in a saucepan over medium heat. Brienne allowed the mixture to simmer into syrup. Once it reached 245 degrees Fahrenheit, it was finished cooking.

Tahini and salt were beat in a stand mixer, and the syrup was carefully folded in. Once the mix began to pull away from the side of the bowl, Brienne stopped the mixer. She didn’t want to over-mix it. Halvah should have a fudge-like texture and over-mixing would make it like sand.

Working quickly with a heatproof spatula, Brienne transferred the mixture to the prepared pan and placed another piece of parchment paper on top. She used her strong hands to smooth out the halvah.

Once it cooled completely, she cut it into squares and wrapped it in plastic. A week later they indulged in the savory sweet treat.

Jaime whined until Brienne reluctantly fed him a piece herself. He flashed a devilish grin before kissing her lightly on the cheek and sauntering out of Le Lion D’or’s kitchen. Brienne stayed in the kitchen, trying to will her blush away.

[jotonomy]

21: What aggravates you about teenagers nowadays?

I DON'T UNDERSTAND THEM. I finally hit that point where I do not know what's going on with teenagers. I mean, it happened a fair number of years ago now, but I'm officially lost. SIGH.

[firesign23]

Phryne Ficathon 3 -- Please sign the guest register

Please sign the guest register: Chapter One

Title: Please sign the guest register Rating: M Chapters: [1/4] Summary: Sometimes, leadership takes you to strange places.  Jack just found one.  He's not comfortable here, but he can't delegate this. Sometimes, a man has to put it all on the line.  Like right now:  there is something he needs to explain to Rosie. Author: TeaandBanjo ( @teaandbanjo) Recipient: SarahToo ( @omgimsarahtoo)