#teachdance

[teachbalance]

@teachdance​  asked: “  what was that— you got this look in your eyes just now and then pushed it back down.  tell me what you were thinking.  ” just more misc memes  

he   does   that   a   lot.   and   she   always   catches   it.   even   back   in   1985   before   everything   went   down   with   silver,   she   knew   he   was   holding   a   few   things,   in   those   quiet   moments   they   spend   together   in   okinawa.   she   recognized   it   too   when   he   pushed   it   down   when   they   reunited   and   she   does   it   now,   so   easily   that   he   wonders   if   he   is   that   transparent   or   perhaps,   this   is   what   it   feels   to   have   someone   know   you   so   deeply,   that   the   little   details   are   all   too   noticable.   “i   feel   I   need   to   confront   him.   I   know   I   have   to.   and   I   can’t   let   anyone   fight   my   fight   but   being   alone   with   him.   .   .it   frightens   me.   because   he   might   still   have   control   over   me.”   because   silver   is   a   master   manipulator   that   can   tell   what   people   need   to   hear,   a   way   with   worst   that   twist   reality   (   he   didn’t   lied   about   daniel   liking   the   power   he   felt   then,   how   good   it   felt,   to   no   longer   be   afraid,   to   be   in   control   )   .   “he   is   gonna   keep   coming   back   if   I   don’t   do   it   though.”

[senseibalance]

he   hates   that   she   is   seeing   him   like   this.   not   that   chozen   would’ve   taken   him   anywhere   else,   knowing   how   worried   she   would   be.   and   that   makes   him   feel   worse.   not   only   is   she   tending   to   him,   her   voice   a   tender   thread   line   he   holds   on   dearly,   but   he   is   also   aware   how   worried   she   was   when   he   didn’t   picked   up   the   phone   (   the   faint   voice   of   chozen   taking   his   phone   and   calling   kumiko   and   saying   something   had   happened   as   he   lay   on   the   floor   ).   “kumiko.”   her   name   is   like   a   prayer   now,   it   aches   to   speak,   it   aches   to   do   anything   other   than   to   try   and   shift   in   his   bed   to   see   her,   through   bruised   eyes   and   swollen   throat,   he   wants   to   say   she   shouldn’t   worry.  

 all   he   can   manage   really   is   extend   his   hand   open   for   her   to   take   and   not   let   his   eyes   fill   with   tears.   “i’m   sorry.”   a   pause,   as   he   swallows   and   hisses   at   the   pain,   it’s   hard   to   breathe   (   can’t   stand,   can’t   breathe,   can’t   see   ).   “i   dragged   you   into   this.”   he   dragged   everyone   didn’t   he?   their   kids,   her,   chozen,   hell,   even   johnny   had   wanted   out   and   he   wanted   to   push   him.   eyes   close   as   he   tries   to   breathe   in   through   the   pain.       || @teachdance​