#teamvolturi

[hallowedhuntress]

Shout out to my teaching job for putting the funniest images in my head.

[hallowedhuntress]

Another weird Aro Headcanon: Aro talks all formal and a little old-fashioned because it’s what people expect of an ancient vampire leader. But he actually picks up modern slang from people’s thoughts quite regularly. So when he’s alone with Marcus and Caius he just drops his entire persona and just spits out words from like, whatever time period he wants, and probably uses like eight different languages in one sentence. 

[hallowedhuntress]

I often find myself wondering, how did the Volturi deal with Google Earth? I mean, come on, one of those cameras had to have caught something suspicious. Did the Volturi have to hunt down some Google interns and eat them? Or did they stalk those self-driving cars?

[hallowedhuntress]

The Volturi are way more interesting to me as a Lawful Neutral organization that uses harsh methods to achieve relative world peace, than as a bunch of two-faced Neutral Evil hypocrites. 

So catch me ignoring everything SMeyer said about them after Breaking Dawn Chapter 30. (This is includes the guide and The Second Life of Bree Tanner)

[hallowedhuntress]

Aro: Okay now, how many of you have played musical instruments before?

Caius: Do instruments of torture count?

Aro: No.

[hallowedhuntress]

Carlisle drink human blood challenge

[hallowedhuntress]

Since we all know Breaking Dawn is a ooc crackfic, I maintain that the Volturi are Lawful Neutral. That’s how they are in New Moon, anyway. And New Moon characterization is the only valid characterization.

[hallowedhuntress]

You know what, the Volturi really are the good guys. I mean, at least they’re a government that isn’t ran by corporations.