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following orders: the goggles (1) ✧ tech

following orders ✧ a tech bad batch story | ao3

inspired by: a conversation with @captainsbestgal

pairing: tech x fem!reader

series summary: you don’t want to live in a galaxy where the love of your life, tech, does not exist. but, you can’t abandon your already grieving family. you devote all of your energy to helping hunter and wrecker save omega from the empire and, perhaps, save the wayward crosshair along the way. but the longer you look for the youngest member of the bad batch, the more you suspect that your lost love is not as lost as you once believed.

chapter summary: the aftermath of plan 99.

word count: 7,223

series warnings?: spoilers for “plan 99”, plan 99, canon-typical violence, hurt tech, canon divergent, fix it fic, angst, grief/mourning, torture, hurt/comfort, emotional hurt/comfort, relationship discussions, mutual pining, clone troopers speak mando’a, depression, suicide ideation, memory loss, brainwashing, jealousy, not proofread

chapter warnings?: mention of tech’s death, grief, mourning, suicide ideation, not proofread

“When have we ever followed orders?”

You cradled Omega in your arms as the Marauder traveled through hyperspace. You weren’t sure if you should still be holding her. She’d been gravely injured, and you have enough first aid training to know that it’s safer to let a person be stabilized than to constantly be adjusting them. But holding onto her, your pseudo-daughter, was the only thing grounding you in this moment. And, perhaps a bit delusional at the moment, you told yourself that, when traveling through hyperspace, maybe it was safer to hold onto her than to let her little body be whipped around the ship—not that her brothers would do that. Not now. Not after everything that’s happened.

“When have we ever followed orders?”

A tear slipped down your cheek. You raised one hand, quick to wipe it away, before returning to holding Omega. You couldn’t cry. Not now. If you cried…That meant it was real. And it couldn’t be real. He couldn’t have…No. He was fine. He was okay. He piloting the ship, he was making last-second calculations to ensure a safe landing. He was…He was not with you. Not now. Not ever. Even if he had beat the odds, used that brilliant mind of his to calculate just the right way to fall…You all left him. You weren’t sure anyone could survive in the wilderness below, even someone as brilliant as him.

“When have we ever followed orders?”

Hunter walked up to you. His face was void of his emotion, save for his eyes. Hunter could play the stoic leader all he liked, but his eyes would always tell a different story. The man was barely holding it together. You could hardly blame him. Losing Tech…No one had seen that coming. No one saw him making the sacrifice play. He was supposed to be on the ship with you. How did he expect you to move on when he meant everything to you? When there was still so much left unsaid?

“When have we ever followed orders?”

Hunter sat down beside you. Omega’s head rested in your lap. He reached down, stroking her blonde curls. He needed this, too. Everything that all of you did was to ensure that Omega would live, that she might one day get to see a peaceful galaxy. Or, when that was too large a task, at least that she would live a peaceful life. That she wouldn’t become a soldier in an unwinnable war. But what was the point in that when all she’d experienced since joining you and her brothers was unspeakable loss? No kid deserved that, especially not one as kind and innocent as her.

“We’ll be landing soon,” Hunter said.

You swallowed, trying to choke down any sob that threatened to escape. “Are you sure this is a good idea? When we were…When we were on Safa Toma, Millegi told us that Cid can’t be trusted.”

Hunter kept his gaze focused on Omega. You weren’t sure, but you thought that he kept his head downturned so that you wouldn’t see any tears that were close to falling. “I don’t see how we have any choice. She needs proper medical treatment. AZI is the only one I trust to make sure…”

To make sure she didn’t die. He couldn’t finish the sentence, but you could feel the weight of it. It nearly suffocated you. You couldn’t lose anymore of your family. The galaxy could not be so cruel as to take another from you. You wouldn’t let it.

“I just worry that Cid will do something. We cut off all communication with her. We may have once been in her good graces, but I don’t know what will happen if she sees us again.”

“I know. But, she has a soft spot for the kid,” Hunter said. His hand fell from Omega’s hair, stroking her cheek. Though still unconscious, she let out a whine. You weren’t sure if it was one of pain, or if she recognized that her father figure was present. “I can only hope that that will grant us some favor.”

“If it doesn’t?”

Hunter’s jaw clenched. He lifted his head, finally looking at you. His eyes were glassy, but hard. With a sort of ferocity you only ever heard from him on the battlefield, he said, “I won’t let anyone take her from us.”

The Marauder jerked slightly as it entered Ord Mantell’s atmosphere. While Echo was more than a capable pilot, he lacked some of the finesse that Tech possessed. Or perhaps you were hyperaware now of every move, every jump, every jerk. It felt like your senses were on fire. Like you had to perceive everything so that you didn’t have to picture his face.

Within minutes of entering the atmosphere, the Marauder landed. Hunter stood, then held out his arms to carry Omega. It was a kind gesture, and maybe he wanted to carry her because he also needed to be grounded. But you knew that if you let go of her, for even a second, you would collapse and never want to get up again. So, you shook your head, adjusting your grip on the young girl, so that you were cradling her in your arms as you stood. It was an effort, you had to admit. You were strong, but that did not compare to the strength of a genetically enhanced clone trooper. But the pain, the burn of your muscles, was one of the only things reminding you were alive, that Omega was alive.

Echo and Wrecker were already waiting outside the ship when you and Hunter emerged. Echo looked much like you and Hunter—stoic, but barely holding it together. Wrecker, on the other hand…The poor guy must have spent the entire journey crying. Tear tracks stained his face, his eyes all red and puffy. Even the tip of his nose was a bright red. When he saw you carrying Omega, he immediately reached out. And, oh, he needed this much more than you. You let him take Omega from your arms, a sob escaping his lips as he held her.

“I’m going to stick with the ship,” Echo said. “Make sure everything’s in working order for when we leave.”

You shared a glance with Hunter. You wanted to say, We might be here a while. Or, you should probably be checked out by AZI, too. We all need help right now. Perhaps even, Please don’t leave us now. But, everyone grieves in their own way. If this was Echo saying he needed to grieve alone, who were you to deny him that?

Hunter said, “Keep your comm on and close by. We might need a quick getaway.”

Echo nodded, then turned back to the ship. You watched as his shoulders sagged as he walked back up. You and Echo were never the closest on the team, but you knew enough of his life before the Batch that losing a member of the team hit him hard. Perhaps when Omega was healed, when you all left this Maker-forsaken planet, you would talk to him. Maybe convince him to stick around a little while longer before rejoining Rex. You couldn’t make him stay forever, but you all were his family. This was not the time to be splitting up for an undetermined length of time.

Hunter squeezed your shoulder, letting you know it was time to go to Cid’s. You let out a shuddering breath, kept your gaze focused on your feet, as you walked the streets to the oh-so-familiar parlor. The entire walk, you tried working on keeping a straight face. You knew you couldn’t hide what happened from Cid—she was far too perceptive to not notice you all were down a man—but you didn’t dare show weakness in front of her. You were already certain a betrayal was on the horizon. You refused to give her anymore ammunition to hurt you with.

The parlor was empty when you arrived, save for Bolo and Ketch. Ketch’s eyes widened when he saw the four of you. You could only imagine how much of Cid’s wrath they had experienced when you all never returned. Bolo’s eyes flicked toward the bar, and you followed his gaze. Cid was wiping down the counter. It seemed like she hadn’t noticed you all yet, but you knew Cid well enough to know she was waiting for one of you to make the first move.

“Is AZI around?” you asked as you approached the bar.

Cid’s eyes flicked up, a snarky remark on the tip of her tongue. But then she saw Omega in Wrecker’s arms, the pained look on his face. Instead of her usual sarcasm, she asked, “What happened to Tiny?”

You looked at Hunter. You weren’t sure how much he wanted to reveal to the Trandoshan. If it was up to you, you would give her nothing. But he was calling the shots, and he might think it better to give something so that she would be more inclined to let the med droid tend to Omega.

“Mission gone wrong,” was all he offered. “She needs to see AZI now.”

Cid nodded her head toward her office. “He’s in the back doing inventory. Do what you need to do. But when the kid’s taken care of, we need to have a talk about best communication practices.”

You narrowed your eyes at her, a snarky remark of your own on the tip of your tongue, but you held back. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you, and all that. If Cid’s concern for Omega was the only thing keeping her from throwing you out, or worse, throwing you to the Empire, you could hold your tongue. For, at least, long enough to let AZI tend to Omega’s wounds.

You started for the back, Wrecker and Hunter following close behind. But you didn’t make it far before Cid stopped you all again.

“Wait. One of youse is missing.” When you looked back at her, Cid’s eyes were flitting between the three of you. “Is Goggles on the ship or something?”

You decided to borrow Hunter’s words, and only offered her, “Mission gone wrong.”

Oh, what an understatement that was. But she didn’t deserve to be privy to the details. She didn’t have the right to know of the pain that stabbed at you, that bit and clawed at your heart, reminding you that you were alive instead of him. She was not a friend. She was hardly an acquaintance. If you couldn’t even talk to your own family about the ache you felt, why should she get to know?

True to her word, though, AZI was flitting around the back, taking stock of the various liquors that Cid ordered for the parlor. He lifted his head when he heard you all approach. You might have been imagining things—and you surely were, because droids don’t express emotions in the same way as sentient beings—but the med droid almost looked happy to see you. Part of you had felt bad for leaving him behind with Cid. He had been Omega’s friend after all. But, Hunter wasn’t keen on returning to Ord Mantell back then. Not after the incident at the ipsium mines. You could hardly blame him, so you didn’t push. Now, you wish you had. If you had come back for AZI all those rotations ago, he would have already been on the ship or at least on the sanctuary that was Pabu. There would have been no need to come back here and endanger your family’s lives any further.

“Oh! I was wondering when you were coming back!” AZI chirped, coming around the many boxes. “Cid had not been very happy when you all didn’t return. But I knew you would come back! And I was right! I knew that if you left, you wouldn’t leave me behind.”

“We need your help,” Hunter said, ignoring the droid’s words. He had previously been standing in front of Wrecker, shielding the droid’s view of the injured Omega. Now, he stepped out of the way. “Omega got hurt, and it’s gonna take more than a few bacta patches to fix her up.”

AZI stared. You could almost sense the hurt he could be feeling. Whether it was at the knowledge that you all weren’t there for him or that his friend was knocking on death’s door, you couldn’t be sure. “I see. I shall get started then.”

You reached out, your fingers grazing the droid. If he could have blinked at you in confusion, you were sure he would have. “Thank you. And…I’m sorry.”

“No need for apologies or gratitude. This is what I’m here for.”

You weren’t sure how long you watched AZI tend to Omega. It felt like days—long, agonizing days as he flitted around her—though you doubted it was any longer than a few hours. You had lost track of time. Between watching him fix up Omega and occasionally tending to you, Hunter, and Wrecker when he needed time for the medicine to work its magic on her, it all kind of felt like a dream. Or, really, a nightmare. The crushing weight of this reality was starting to settle on your chest. You didn’t like this. You didn’t like it at all.

At some point, Hunter brought you some breads and a glass of water. “Eat,” he said, ordering you like you were a soldier. You and him both knew that you would ignore him if he asked. “He wouldn’t want you to starve.”

You let out a quiet huff of a laugh, if you could even call it that. “He would talk about the benefits of a well-balanced diet, go on about how the food here was hardly sustenance, but that fed is best.”

Hunter wiped away a tear that rolled down your cheek. You’d hardly noticed it. How long had you been crying? You’d been so sure that you were holding it together still. “We’ll get through this.” He nodded his head at the door, gesturing to where Wrecker had disappeared after AZI put his neck in a brace. Wrecker had been placing a huge amount of space between you and him. The guilt must have been hurting him, too—even if he had nothing to feel guilty for. “Wrecker and I were talking about staying on Pabu full time, after Omega is fixed up.”

“What about Crosshair?”

Hunter’s jaw clenched. “I can’t trust that his message wasn’t a trap. I’m not going to lose any more of my family on the chance that he’s switched sides. He’s given no indication that he wanted to join us before.”

“It’s not a trap. I know it’s not.” Perhaps it was a low blow, being so close to the incident, but you couldn’t stop yourself from saying, “Tech knew it wasn’t a trap.”

Hunter swallowed, hard. You watched as his Adam’s apple bobbed. Then— “Tech…died so his family could be safe. I’m honoring his wishes.”

“Crosshair is part of this family. His message, it was a sign that he still cared. That despite everything, he still cares.”

Hunter started to argue, but his mouth snapped shut when Omega groaned. He shot you a look—this wasn’t over. But the conversation would have to be tabled for another day.

You squeezed his shoulder. “We can go to Pabu if that’s what Omega wants. Whatever she chooses, I’ll respect.”

“Hunter?” Omega managed to say. She said your name as she realized you sat beside him.

Hunter immediately leaned over her, stroking her hair. You reached out, taking one of her hands, giving it a squeeze. Hunter offered her a small smile, and said, “Hiya, kid.”

“You gave us a right scare there,” you said.

Omega let out a groan and started to sit up. “W-What happened?”

You and Hunter shared a glance. You could hardly put into words the ordeal you all just experienced. You weren’t sure you could explain it to her without crying, but you also didn’t want Hunter to shoulder that responsibility. He already carried too much weight on his shoulders.

But before you could say anything, AZI entered the room. He chirped, “Hello, Omega. I am relieved you are awake.” He did a quick scan of her, the light blue light illuminating her face. “You each sustained multiple injuries. However, you all will make a full recovery with proper treatment and rest.”

Omega sat up, a hand clutching her head. Hunter reached around, helping her so that she didn’t make things too hard for herself. You gave her hand another squeeze. At this point, it was probably more for your comfort than hers. She was alive. She would be okay. That’s all that mattered right now. If you could focus on that, everything would be okay. Eventually.

At the sound of Omega’s voice, Wrecker came into the room. He wouldn’t look at you, even when you tried to meet his gaze. You understood why—the guilt he must feel would be tremendous. He was the brawn on the operation. He was the muscles. It’s his job to make sure that no one in his family has to take the brunt of any injuries. In his eyes, he failed. In his eyes, he’s the reason your heart is broken. In his eyes, he’s the reason Tech died.

You hadn’t been sure how to comfort him, so you let him go off on his own for a while. You weren’t quite sure how to comfort yourself. So, you let him sit in his misery and you in yours. Now, though, you wish you’d done something. It hurt, him not being able to look at you, even if he thought he was trying to spare you the pain.

“You’re—You’re okay,” Wrecker said. He stumbled forward, kneeling in front of Omega, letting out a breath. He was the perfect picture of held-back panic. He held Omega in a quick hug, careful not to press on any of her injuries. “Don’t scare us like that again.”

Hunter offered her a drink. “How do you feel?”

“I don’t know,” she mumbled. Her face twisted, contorted into sadness. You’d almost hoped she hadn’t remembered. She doesn’t deserve this kind of pain. She shouldn’t have to know this kind of loss. “The last thing that I remember, we were in the railcar when…”

She gasped, her eyes going wide. Her eyes darted toward you, searching for an answer to the unsaid question. But you couldn’t meet her gaze. If you did, you would cry. And if you cried, you would confirm her worst fears.

She looked to Hunter. “Where’s Tech?”

Hunter looked away, looked at you. You gave a nod. She had to know. “Omega, Tech didn’t make it.”

You dropped Omega’s hand, letting your hand come to rest on Hunter’s shoulder. You gave it a squeeze. You’d meant what you said, that he shouldn’t have to shoulder all this responsibility. You felt bad for making him say it, but you suppose she would only believe the news from him.

“We have to go back!” Omega said. “What if he’s hurt? He—He needs us! Tell him, Wrecker! We can’t just leave him!”

You looked at Wrecker, seeing his eyes squeeze shut. Oh, that must have killed him. That must have confirmed every dark thought that swirled in his gentle mind. Was it too soon to force everyone into a group hug?

“Omega,” you said, reaching out, stopping her from jumping out of the bed. “You saw him. He calculated the odds right before he did it. He knew his chances, and he’s seldom wrong.”

“NO!” Omega smacked your hand away. “Tech’s not gone! You know he’s not! He—He can’t be!”

Her face screwed up as the tears began to fall. Hunter took your place, wrapping his arms around her. She sobbed into his chest. Your heart clenched at the sight. She was alive, but she was hurting. And you weren’t sure what to do about that. Nothing that you said would help her. Nothing you said would bring him back.

You rose to your feet, glancing between the members of your family. “I-I need to go,” you mumbled, stumbling out of the room.

You didn’t make it very far, nearly collapsing into a seat at the bar. Your shoulders trembled as you tried to keep your sobs at bay. Until that moment, it hadn’t quite hit you that he was gone. You knew he was. You were there when he fell. You saw the calmness in his eyes, his acceptance of his fate. You could feel the unspoken words on the tip of his tongue as he said his final words. You felt the tremble of the railcar, the panic in your chest as the line snapped, as he plummeted…Going, going, gone.

You’d lived through all of that, but a naïve sort of part of you had hoped. Had prayed to the Maker, to the Force, to whatever cosmic being there was that controlled Tech’s fate that he had made it. But at that altitude? With a railcar plummeting with him? Even if he survived the fall, the railcar landing on him would surely do him in. Tech had accepted his death, but you couldn’t.

How could you? He had meant everything to you. He was the air you breathed, the reason you stayed with the Batch for so long. When the war ended, you had no reason to stay. Your contract with the Republic ended the moment that battles stopped. But he…He gave you one look, one unspoken plea, and you stayed.

What was the point now?

You lifted your head as Wrecker collapsed into a seat next to you. He stared at the bar. Knowing that he wouldn’t make any move, you grabbed his hand, gave it a squeeze. “It’s not your fault,” you whispered. “There was nothing you could have done to change what happened.”

Maybe the words were partly said for your own peace of mind, but it brought neither you nor Wrecker any belief. “He was gonna ask ya out when we got back to Pabu,” he mumbled. “He knew you liked looking at tha stars, so he planned a midnight picnic. Was gonna tell you every fact he knew about every star, planet, comet in tha sky.”

“…Oh.” You weren’t sure what else to say. What could you say? How could express the remorse of never getting to experience a future you so badly craved?

“He wanted to come back to ya. He was supposed to come back to ya. And I’m the reason he didn’t. You should hate me.”

“I could never hate you, Wrecker,” you said. You squeezed his hand. “I meant what I said. His fate was sealed when he went out with me to make repairs.”

“I saved you. I should have saved him, too. I could have saved him.”

Your bottom lip trembled. “He made you get me first. He made his choice. Wrecker, he knew his fate. You…You did everything he wanted you too. Okay? So don’t, don’t feel bad about what happened.”

The sound of two glasses hitting the bar pulled you from your conversation with Wrecker. When you looked up, Cid was sliding you and him a couple of drinks. Your stomach twisted. You didn’t like the look in her eyes. There was something she wasn’t telling you. “Here,” she said. “These are on the house.”

You pushed the glass in front of you away. “Nothing ever comes for free with you, Cid.”

Wrecker pushed his glass, too. “It won’t help.”

Cid was silent for a beat. “I’m sorry about Goggles. I always liked him.”

“Yeah. Me too,” Wrecker said.

You watched Cid. She had her arms crossed over her chest, one of her clawed fingers tapping anxiously. You sat a little straighter, sniffed back a couple of your tears. No matter what grief you were experiencing, you needed to keep your mind sharp. You had walked right back into the lion’s den. You needn’t give Cid any opportunity to betray you.

Wrecker noticed, too. “What’s with you?” he grunted.

Cid wagged one finger at him. “You know, I tried to look out for you kids. But you got too much heat on you. And you brought it here, to my place of business! I had to make the best of a bad situation.”

You watched the rage contort on Wrecker’s face. Oh, you don’t know if you had ever seen him so mad before. You almost expected him to reach across the bar and kill Cid with his bare hands. Instead, he growled, “What did you do?”

“Sorry, Muscles. Sorry, Killer.”

The doors to the parlor slid open. You were immediately on your feet, shoved behind Wrecker as a group of commando clones entered the parlor, their blasters raised. One shot at Wrecker, and he charged, more stun bolts firing at him. One hit you, and you went down easily, not able to put the same kind of fight as Wrecker. As you fell, you prayed to the Maker that Hunter got away—or at least that he convinced Omega to leave you all behind if he wanted to play hero.

The commando clones had you and Wrecker kneeling with your hands bounds behind two of them, maybe another half dozen behind you, all of their blasters raised at the door, waiting for Hunter. Hemlock stood beside you, watching you curiously as you avoided his gaze. He knew something. He knew something about Tech. Your eyes fell to the case he was holding, wondering what its contents were. Was it Tech’s head? His helmet? Some other cruel piece of his life, of his memory to taunt the fact that you all lost?

Hunter emerged from the back, his blaster raised. You let out a breath. At least Omega wasn’t with him. At least she might have escaped. He wouldn’t have come out unless he was sure she was long gone.

“That’s not very strategic, Hunter,” Hemlock said. “You don’t need to use your enhanced senses to know you’re outnumbered.”

Hemlock turned to Cid, raising the case. “The Empire thanks you for your assistance,” he said, passing the case to the Trandoshan.

Oh. It was just credits. Maybe Hemlock wasn’t so cruel to taunt you all with Tech’s death using whatever part of him they uncovered.

Cid and Hunter shared a look, before Hemlock said, “Our business is done. Leave.”

Cid’s head dropped. She turned, walking past you and Wrecker. She paused for a second, looking like she wanted to tell you something. Maybe an apology. You weren’t sure. All you knew was, whatever she had to say died in her throat as you reared your head back, spitting at her. Childish, sure. Gross, definitely. But Cid didn’t deserve your respect. Not now. Not after she sold you all out.

Hemlock turned his attention back to Hunter. “Please, consider your next move very carefully. I would hate for this to end poorly for all of you. Here is how this is going to go. You will lower your blaster and hand over Omega. And I will allow you to keep breathing.”

“Omega’s not going anywhere with you,” Hunter growled.

“Oh. Well, who knew clones are so paternal? Fascinating,” Hemlock said. He paused for a moment. “I was saddened to learn of your friend’s demise. What was his name? Oh, yes, Tech.”

You let out a growl. He didn’t deserve to say Tech’s name. What right did he have to talk about Tech?

Hemlock glanced back at you, his eyebrows raised. As he took in your expression, he turned more fully. He reached out, a finger running down your cheek. You fought the urge to bite him. That wouldn’t end well. “Ah, yes, the girlfriend, right?” he mused. Not technically. You and Tech never made anything official. “From what I gathered, the two of you were rather…intimate. I didn’t know clones could do that, either. Though, I suppose his form of intimacy is far different than a…normal human, wouldn’t you say?”

“Don’t you dare talk about him,” you spat. “You have no right.”

“So protective,” he said. Chuckling to himself, he turned back to Hunter. Beside you, Wrecker growled, only to be hit with a blaster by one of the clones holding you all captive. One of the commando clones handed him something. You couldn’t quite see what it was. “I’m afraid this was all I could salvage. Consider it a gift.”

He tossed the object at Hunter’s feet, and you could finally see what it was. A sob caught in your throat. No. No. No, no, no. If that was all they managed to recover, then that meant…Another sob escaped you before your could stop it.

“To lose one of your own, it must weigh heavily on you as their leader.” Hemlock glanced back at the clones. Several of them pressed their weapons into Wrecker. One of them reached out, grabbing you by the hair, yanked your head back. He pressed his blaster into your temple. You wondered how eager he was to shoot. At least if you died, then you could be with Tech. “And if you don’t lower the blaster now, you will lose more.”

Wrecker shook his head. You couldn’t do the same, not with the way you were being held, so you did your best to convey your message in your eyes. Don’t lower your blaster. We’ll be fine.

Still, Hunter slowly lowered the blaster and set it on the floor. He picked up Tech’s goggles, the glassiness in his eyes clear.

“Wise decision,” Hemlock said. He motioned to the clones, and two of them stepped forward to bind Hunter’s wrists. They pushed him to where you and Wrecker were kneeling on the ground.

Another clone came from the back and reported, “Sir, the girl is not in the office.”

“She’s long gone,” Hunter said. “Like I said, Omega’s not going anywhere with you.”

“Hmm. We’ll see.”

Oh, how could Hunter have been so right and so wrong all at the same time? Omega was, indeed, long gone, but she’d been taken by Hemlock. Despite your family’s best efforts, no one could stop Hemlock. Part of you wished that Omega had listened to Hunter, that she escaped and left you all behind. But the other part of you understood. She’s lost too much. If she lost you, Wrecker, and Hunter to the Empire…You weren’t sure how she would survive that kind of heartache. But now, the three of you and Echo floated through space, with no idea on where to go. Your mission had been a failure—you didn’t have the first clue where Hemlock’s base of operations was. Everything that you all fought—everything that you all lost—was for nothing.

Eventually, Hunter told Echo to fly you all back to Pabu. Returning there and clearing all of your minds before making the next move was important. Everyone’s emotions were still high. Even if you all could come to a decision, could fall upon some useful information, there was no guarantee that a rescue operation would be successful. While Omega was in more danger the longer she was in Hemlock’s control, it would do her no good if all of you were captured trying to save her.

You spent the journey laying in Tech’s bunk. Your face pressed into his pillow, bundled up in his covers, trying to commit his scent to memory. His bunk always smelled clean. Crosshair, back in the days of the Republic, once told you that Tech had been incredibly messy before you were assigned to the team. But the moment Tech met you, he went out of his way to keep his area as clean as could be. Back then, you thought Tech was just trying to be kind, to make you feel welcome. Now, you realized he was trying to impress you.

Tears burned at your eyes at the memory. You tried blinking them away, focusing on the scribbles on the wall of Tech’s bunk. Most of them were about ship repairs that he would be doing with you, or upgrades to weapons. But there was one in the corner, near his pillow, that caught your eye.

In his messy scrawl, he had written out a series of steps to win a woman’s heart. Most of them were checked off, save for three. Step 7. Take her on a date—make sure it’s something she would enjoy. Step 8. Kiss her—refer to holofilms for best approach. Step 9. Ask her to be yours—let it be her choice.

You let out a choked laugh, running your fingers over the words. Wrecker was right. Tech had been planning to ask you out. Oh, he had planned everything out. You wondered how long he had this plan. What you would give to have him back for just a moment, to ask him every question you ever wanted to ask, to listen to his voice, to be with him, to tell him you love him, too.

When the Marauder landed, you reluctantly left the comfort of Tech’s bunk, joining the boys. As you walked out of the ship, you saw Phee waiting. She wore a bright smile on her face, her eyes twinkling. Considering your abrupt departure, you had no doubt that she had a million questions she wanted to ask about the mission.

“Didn’t think you guys would be back from your secret mission so soon,” she teased. “Did you get what you were looking for?”

You looked at her, and shook your heard. It was one thing to tell Cid that the mission was a failure—she didn’t really care about your family. But to tell Phee? Who had gone out of her way to bring you guys to a place to a call home? Who showed time and time again that she cared, even if she had a funny way of going about it? It hurt.

Her smile didn’t waiver. She understand yet. “Ah, well, that’s okay. I’m sure you guys’ll get ‘em next time! Say, what’s the long face’s for? The mission wasn’t that bad was it?”

Hunter squeezed your shoulder. You reached up, squeezed his hand back. Behind you, you could hear Wrecker shuffle his feet and the quiet whhrr of Echo’s scomp as he fiddled with it. No one offered an explanation.

“Geez, you guys look rough. Must’ve been real bad out there.” Phee glanced between the four of you, her smile falling. “Say, where’s Brown Eyes? Where’s the kid?”

You opened your mouth but no words came out. You looked back at Wrecker, Hunter, and Echo, but none of them seemed keen to answer. Phee seemed to know, though. You all wouldn’t be so put out, so mournful looking, if something bad hadn’t happened. When you looked back at her, she had stepped closer to you, a hand coming to rest on your shoulder.

“I don’t know what happened, but I’m sorry,” she said.

Your lip quivered. Kriff. You couldn’t take this. None of this was supposed to happen. You all were supposed to find out where Crosshair was, you were supposed to rescue him. Everyone was supposed to be reunited. You all were supposed to come back to Pabu and live as normal a life as you could manage. You weren’t supposed to lose Tech. Omega wasn’t supposed to be captured.

Shrugging off Phee’s hand, you ran off. No one bothered to follow you, to call after you. For that, you were grateful. You didn’t want to be around anyone right. Not for a while.

You settled on the docks. It was nearly dusk when the Marauder landed, so most of the fishermen had docked their boats and returned to their families with whatever they managed to catch. It was the perfect place for you. Almost no one around to bother you. You were as alone as you felt.

Sitting on the edge of the dock, you let your legs hang over. You leaned all the way back so that you stared at the sky. The beautiful reds and oranges soon faded into a black abyss. The stars started to peak out, winking down at you. Once upon a time, you would have killed for the opportunity to watch the stars like this. There was seldom free time like this in the last few years. The stars once brought you comfort, providing you a map for your way back home. But it was different now.

The stars no longer brought you comfort. What was the point in the stars guiding you home if he wasn’t there to go with you?

Your eyes fluttered shut. For the first time since the incident, you let yourself cry. Sure, tears had escaped before, when you didn’t want them to. But you had been holding them at bay this entire time, trying to focus on the tasks at hand. Now, there was nothing to do. There was nothing you could do. Nothing, except mourn. A sob wracks your chest. You cover your face with your hands, letting everything you’d been holding in out.

You cried, and you cried, and you cried. Until there were no tears left. Until you uncovered your face, staring back at the stars, sniffling.

A steady clunk! of a set of boots alerted you to a guest. You had a one-in-four shot of guessing who’d come to comfort you, but you didn’t care enough to see who it was. Did it matter? None of those four people were the one you wanted. And none of those four people was the kid you were supposed to protect.

You saw Hunter’s face as he finally reached you, sitting down beside you. He said nothing. Hunter was never really the comforting type. He’d gotten better since Omega joined the team, learning to navigate his emotions so that he could be a better parent. But this wasn’t the sort of thing he’d been prepared for. None of you were prepared for this.

“I asked Shep to set you aside some dinner if you decide you’re hungry,” he said. “He said you can come into his house anytime you decide you’re hungry and take it. It has a note on it for you, in his fridge.”

“Thank you,” you said.

A silence passes over you. There’s so much to say. There’s so much you want to say. So much you aren’t sure how to say. How do you navigate this sort of sudden loss? What was the right way to grieve? What was the right way to comfort? A thousand possibilities flooded your mind. None of them felt right. Finally, you settled on an apology.

“I’m sorry for running off,” you said. “If I worried you, I’m sorry. That wasn’t my intent.”

Hunter shrugged. “I knew where you were. I figured you just…needed time.”

“No amount of time can bring him back.” You sat up, looking out at the dark sea. If you jumped in now, you might sink fast enough under the weight of your armor that, by the time Hunter dove in after you, it would be too late. Even with his enhanced senses, the water would drown it all out. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save Omega.”

“You’re sounding like Wrecker now,” he said. He had heard your conversation with him back at Cid’s. Usually, he kept quiet about conversations he overheard. But things were different now. No one knew how to navigate this sort of hurt. “They got us while we were down. I don’t know if there was anything we could do to save her.”

You rested your hand on Hunter’s shoulder. “We’ll get her back.”

“We will,” he affirmed. He reached for something that you couldn’t quite see. When he brought his hands back into your view, you gasped. “I, uh, came to give you these.”

“Hunter, no—”

“I talked with Wrecker and Echo. We all agreed that he would have wanted you to have them. Anything of his, it’s yours. But these especially.”

As he pressed the goggles into your hands, a tear rolled down your cheek. Oh, this was too much. How could you look at these goggles and not want to jump off the dock? How could you look at the cracked lenses and not picture his eyes squeezing shut as he hit the ground? How could you not imagine the way he looked at you, in the split second before he made his choice? How could you not see of how he looked before, when you all were leaving for the mission, the fire in his eyes as he searched for a way to rescue his brother? How could you not dream of the soft look in his eyes the night before, when you rested your head on his shoulder and told him how you wished the two of you could have a peaceful life? You ran your thumb over the light that used shone red, indicating his constant filming of his surroundings. It was off now. Part of you wondered why, but you dismissed the thought. It was probably broken in the fall.

“What do we do now?” you ask. You look up at Hunter to see him already looking at you. His eyes were glassy still. You wondered if he had allowed himself the privacy to cry yet, or if he was still playing the part of the stoic leader. “Echo’s probably going to return to Rex soon. Wrecker’s in no position to fight. Kark, neither of us are either. We don’t have the first clue where to look. We don’t have—”

Hunter squeezed your shoulder. “We’ll figure it out. I don’t know how, but…We’ve faced horrible odds before.”

“We had a hundred percent success rate back then.”

“I don’t know what we’ll do,” he said, “but if we stick together, we’ll figure it out. I know we will.”

You wanted to push back, to argue, to feel something other than this grief, but you didn’t want to hurt Hunter in the process. So you let it go. Instead, you asked, “Could you tell me about? What he was like before I joined the team?”

Hunter let out a chuckle. “When we were cadets, Tech was a complete menace. Worse than the rest of us, if you could believe it. Always challenged the Kaminoans at every turn.”

You laughed, the picture forming in your mind. You leaned back against as Hunter talked, and soon he did, too, telling you everything about what little Tech had been like. For a moment, you forgot all that you’d just endured. For a moment, you felt at peace. But then you felt the weight of Tech’s goggles in your hands, and you were thrown back into the reality you were faced it.

Tech was gone—you were sure of it. But he died to make sure his family would live. You weren’t going to let him die in vain. No matter what it took, no matter what you had to do, you would get Omega and Crosshair back.

You swore it.

#tech bad batch fic

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#tech bad batch fic