#ted knoll

[incorrectjohndiesattheendquotes]

John: Ted, guess what time it is?

Ted: What?

[the BATMANTIS??? tackles Ted]

John: Fuck if I know!

[incorrectjohndiesattheendquotes]

Ted Knoll: Lets play the game of whose life sucks the most. I'll win. I always win.

Dave: You don't want to play with me.

[incorrectjohndiesattheendquotes]

Dave: You don't trust me at all, do you?

Ted Knoll: Well, I'll tell you what. You make it through tomorrow without killing anybody, especially me, or yourself, then I'll start trusting you.

Dave: Fair enough.

[incorrectjohndiesattheendquotes]

Ted Knoll: (about Dave) So, this is how an immature, engaged, college dropout, with no car, no job, and no money saves the world.

John: That was like eight burns in one sentence.

Amy: An octo-burn!

[incorrectjohndiesattheendquotes]

Ted Knoll: I need to find my daughter. She's going to drive that Nymph man crazy.

John: Is she really annoying?

Ted Knoll: She's so annoying. She's amazing, but so annoying.

[incorrectjohndiesattheendquotes]

Ted Knoll: You're a font of useful information.

Dave: No one's ever accused me of being useful before.