#tess rambles

[incorrectsibunaquotes]

Sibuna is better than me, because my coping mechanism for scary things is to make jokes. Fortunately, I’m very funny, but unfortunately the whole squad and I would be laughing and probably die immediately

[spacehostilityy]

thoughts on nnt's interaction with taboo topics

As I am rewatching NNT (starting with the middle of season 2, since it's my favorite and that's also where I left off last time) as an actual grown adult, I am even sadder that there are such weird things in the series. I enjoy dark/dead dove content in media generally and am vehemently anti censorship and pro don't like/don't read. However, this is not the case with the weird age things and pedo bait in the show. The weirdly young looking designs of certain characters (Meliodas and Elaine esp) do not add to the plot or make a commentary or engage directly in dark/fetish fictional content; they just make viewers uncomfortable. I'm not even mad at the insanely skimpy outfits the ladies of the show wear (the men are constantly flaunting their slutty and impossibly tiny waists, so I feel like there's pretty equal treatment there). I'm mad that a show/manga with genuinely devastating plotlines, incredible action sequences, compelling world building and magic systems, flawed, nuanced, and touching found family relationships, and beautifully tragic romance also has out of place pervy actions done by and to intentionally young looking characters while targeting a teen and up audience.

Like, I'm all for sexy, even fucked up sexy, media. But this is not it! It's an action adventure fantasy with random weird interactions that drag down the enjoyment/plot !!

I wouldn't advocate for total character redesigns. I love a short man/tall woman relationship, and I understand that Meliodas is supposed to look a bit unassuming, but it's weird to see him with an adult Elizabeth with no mention of it and seemingly no commentary. Petite women also... exist? There's really no reason to make Elaine look so young. AND MERLIN?? Literally no reason for her to have a child form when her established character is a promiscuous and empowered woman in her 30s. Obviously, I'm beating tf out of a dead horse, but man. Seeing the acceptance of diversity, the genuinely great writing, and gut-wrenching storyline in just a few season 2 episodes really reminds me of what could have been if n*kaba hadn't randomly placed taboo content in his series that does not explore the taboo in any critical way AND is intended for a mainstream audience (seemingly not an adult audience either, since there isn't really actual cursing or explicitly sexual scenes that aren't unfunny jokes)

In conclusion, i will always mourn what nnt could have been if it removed the shock value taboo and acted like it actually respected its teen and up audience as capable of hearing the word fuck while not wanting to see uncomfortable age differences explained away by ancient magic.

[rosiac-ash]

"Hottie alert <3" grown ass man giggling over a man from his source by the way

[cravingstudyvalidation]

how the fuck are we already 6 months into 2023.

[the-malevolent-tides]

Writing both Alastair and Jesse as fathers in The Malevolent Tides >>>

[tess-or-no]

am i really the only one who unironically likes “ME!”? i feel like i can’t be.

[upon-the-waters]

Finding the Divine Daughter

Aka, I’ve finally come to the end of the spiritual tailspin I’ve been in since last October.

TL;DR (So many of my posts need these because I am a writer at heart, and I don’t want people getting annoyed at my paragraphs clogging up their feeds): I’m kind of obsessed with the way the Holy Spirit and the Christian perception of Divine Feminine has some parallels to the Mother and Daughter in Filianism. So I’m going to talk about it, with a lot of words. A LOT of words... You’ve been warned.

First off, in some Gnostic sects there’s the concept of Sophia’s daughter, Zoe. If Sophia is Divine Wisdom, Zoe is Divine Life. But yet, Zoe and Sophia are also two different ways of looking at the same entity-- a Mother and Daughter, that are also as One. A Gnostic interpretation of the Book of Genesis states that the Holy Mother Pistis Sophia sent forth the emanation of Herself, Her Daughter, Sophia Zoe. I’m going to make a quick clarification here, and that is that Sophia, or Lady Wisdom as spoken of in the Bible, and the Holy Spirit are the same entity. So already we have Sophia/Holy Spirit spoken of in Mother/Daughter terms. However, this is just within Gnosticism, and I personally have a lot of problems with Gnosticism (the amount of patriarchy still in it, but also its demonization of the material world, which I believe God created good). And while Zoe was the catalyst to the research that led me to discovering Filianism, to me the parallels don’t stop there.

Within the Bible, Sophia Herself is often characterized as a Daughter-figure, as She tells us in the book of Proverbs that She was birthed by YHWH before creation. Catholic tradition also equates Sophia with Mother Mary; I believe Valentin Tomberg in particular referred to the Divine Feminine as Maria-Sophia. To me, Maria-Sophia-- or Dea, to use the Filianic name-- is already pretty clearly Mother, so my research focuses primarily on finding Her Daughter aspect.

Sophia is also often equated with Shekinah, the Kabbalistic Jewish title for the Presence of God. According to the Northern Way website, where I first learned of Shekinah, She is the Mother, but I think it makes far more sense to see Her as the Daughter-- the immanence of God as opposed to the transcendence. Shekinah is also seen by some as the Bride of the male God, who was lost in the wilderness as a result of humanity’s fall from grace. However, there is an implication that this was actually voluntary on Her part, as she chose to remain with humanity and share in our sufferings-- much like the Holy Daughter. In fact, I’m almost positive the Janite website used to refer to Shekinah as a way of looking at the Holy Daughter, but I’m unable to find it after crawling through the Wayback Machine for a while... they do, however, call the Holy Daughter Zoe Sophia among other names! 

There is a very clear parallel between Shekinah and the Holy Spirit-- both of them are said to have descended down to us and given themselves to us. They are both said to be the Soul of the World, the spark of divinity present within creation.

St. Hildegard writes of two aspects of the Holy Spirit-- Sapientia and Caritas, Wisdom and Love. To make these names easier to pronounce, I translate them as Sophia and Charis. It is my belief that these two aspects of the Holy Spirit are the Celestial Mother and Holy Daughter aspects of Dea, the way She was seen by Hildegard and now by me. Sophia is the Creatrix, and Charis is the World Soul. Charis also means Life, not just Love-- I believe that Charis and Zoe are different names for this Daughter Holy Spirit, but I personally prefer Charis. St. Hildegard tells us that the Holy Spirit is both the sun and the moon. She is transcendent and immanent-- in Filianic terms, She is Mother and Daughter.

In the article I reblogged recently from the Chapel of Our Mother God, on Mary’s Immaculate Heart, Mary is equated to the Solar Mother. However, I believe that the Immaculate Heart shows Mary as both Mother and Daughter-- something the Chapel acknowledges when it discusses the Heart shown pierced by swords. Mary is also referred to as Queen of Heaven, which in Filianism is a title of the Daughter.

The Immaculate Heart is paralleled to the sun with its two fundamental qualities-- Warmth and Light. These two qualities correspond to the Divine Love and the Divine Wisdom, respectively, and are shown as the Immaculate Heart is both aflame with love and shining with wisdom. The Filianic Creed states that the Celestial Mother is Pure Light, and the Holy Daughter is Perfect Love. That is why, to me, Mary is the Holy Mother God, as well as the Daughter who suffered for us, intercedes for us, and brings us with Her to ascension as the Queen of Heaven, and parallels neatly with St. Hildegard’s writings of the Holy Spirit as Wisdom/Sophia and Love/Charis, my names for the Mother and Daughter Holy Spirit. Catholics are fond of saying that Mary is the Daughter of the Father and the Mother of the Son, and I like that (although I ultimately see the “Father” as genderless). However, they also call Her the Spouse of the Holy Spirit. To me, Mary is the Holy Spirit. St. Maximilian Kolbe basically says this as well, and that this is what the Immaculate Conception means. 

Finally: St. Therese, the saint I credit with sending me on this crazy crisis of faith last year? She once said of herself: “My call is love... In the heart of the church, my mother, I will be love, and thus I will be all things.” Is it a coincidence that she eventually led me to finding Charis, Holy Love, Holy Spirit, Holy Daughter? Maybe. But I really don’t think so.

[withclawsandsympathy]

look I know we feel like we just sit inside and stare at screens all day during this pandemic but in the midst of this terrifying and horrific thing unfolding all around us, we chose to make art, to draw and to write and to create.

The world crumbled around us and we chose to keep telling stories instead of succumbing to that. Stories about perseverance. Stories about love. I just think that’s really a beautiful thing.