Martin: Hey don't mean to impose, could you pick up the creamer for the break room?
Tim: isn't this something that's supposed to be provided?
Martin: Oh- There's creamer- It's just. Very bad.
Tim: that cheap french vanilla shit?
Martin: Mmhm.
Tim: yeah sure.
Tim: wait, do you even drink coffee?
Martin: Well, no. But Sasha does. And Jon sometimes.
Tim: oh thank god.
Martin: What?
Tim: you went five minutes with out mentioning the boss.
Tim: i was sure prentiss got you again.
Martin: Oh fuck off Tim.
Tim: :p
------
🌩: Oh my god. Stop.
🍃: too good for Hand Written Invitations are we?
🌩: You send me one once a week. It's lost the pizzaz. It's lost the flavor.
🍃: you say this as if I have other people to go sky diving with
🌩: Of course you do! Everyone! Everyone is into free skydiving! Just don't bother asking first!
🍃: it's not the same with them
🍃: they just don't Get It
🌩: Oh my god.
🍃: you can even invite that cute Dead boy
🌩: Oh My God.
🍃: don't feel like you have to pretend for me
🌩: Stop. I'm begging you to stop.
🍃: all i'm saying is i Posed Nude for a lot of painters during the golden years
🌩: No one calls it that. Stop telling me about your childhood flings with Italians.
🍃: some of them were German.
🍃: and Flemish.
🍃: and there was this one Dutch boy.
🌩: Wait.
🍃: sure a bit Spiral for my taste but there's really nothing wrong with that either
🌩: Wait.
🍃: oh, Spiral's a sore spot for you huh
🍃: memory does Go first
🍃: something to look Forward too
🍃: well ignore that I Suppose but really, cross fear is totally acceptable.
🌩: You're exhausting.
🍃: i'm sure some people would argue but everyone does it Eventually
🍃: look at Peter Lukas.
🌩: They divorced like ten times.
🍃: but he keeps coming back to him, Doesn't He?
-------
Sasha: I might be a little late today.
Jonathan Sims: Don't worry about it.
Sasha: Cheers.
-------
👧: ლ(●ↀωↀ●)ლ so excited so excited so excited
🐛: HHHAAAHHHAAAHHHAAA WWWHHHYYY
🧒🏻: (ٛ⁎꒪̕ॢ ˙̫ ꒪ٛ̕ॢ⁎) why they say!!!
🐛: OOOHHH TTTHHHEEE RRRIIITTTUUUAAALLL
🧒🏾: (☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞ i'm so excited i can barely stand it!!!
🐛: BBBUUUTTT IIITTTSSS NNNOOOTTT EEEVVVEEENNN YYYOOOUUURRRSSS
👦🏾: i know!!! that's what makes it stressful. but if you need ANYTHING ᕕ༼✿•̀︿•́༽ᕗ
🐛: HHHAAAHHHAAA IIILLL AAASSSKKK YYYOOOUUU FFFIIIRRRSSSTTT
👧🏼: ♪～(◔◡◔ิ)人(╹◡╹๑)～♪
🐛: WWWHHHIIICCCHHH OOONNNEEE IIISSS MMMEEE
👦🏿: the cute one ♫ ┌༼ຈل͜ຈ༽┘ ♪
-------
Jonathan Sims: Hey.
🌀: hEy
Jonathan Sims: Are you-
Jonathan Sims: [Is Typing]
Jonathan Sims: You know what. Never mind. I was going to ask you something stupid. It doesn't matter.
🌀: lMaO sUrE
-------
🍃: anyway, Enough about me
🍃: invite the cute Dead boy
🍃: it's so Romantic
🍃: the view Alone
🌩: Okay, first of all, we're just friends. Second of all, even if we weren't, I don't need dating tips from you.
🍃: Debatable.
🌩: Third of all. Even if I was gay, and even if Oliver was interested, and even if I asked him out on a date.
🍃: phenomenal hypotheticals lad.
🌩: What on Earth makes you think I'd invite you along?
🍃: hmm.
🍃: if i was a Lesser man, i would say something like
🍃: how dare You
🍃: my Own son
🌩: We're not related.
🍃: but! instead!
🍃: i can just point out the Space station i own
🍃: and call it a Day
-------
Jonathan Sims: Elias, call an exterminator. This is getting ridiculous.
Elias Bouchard: Jon, don't be ridiculous. You want to involve more humans with Prentiss' worms?
Jonathan Sims: I'm not even talking about the worms, which I would argue proves my point beyond all reason.
Elias Bouchard: What are you talking about then?
Jonathan Sims: I had to kill three spiders today Elias. Three.
Elias Bouchard: Yes, you're very brave Jon. I'm very proud.
Jonathan Sims: Are you in your office?
Elias Bouchard: No where else in the world I'd rather be, Jon.
-------
🕸️: hey oli
🕸️: no hard feelings right?
🕸️: we're still buds?
🕸️: still friends?
🕸️: still tight?
⚰️: Was that a pun
🕸️: it's not fun if you point it out kid
🕸️: keep up
🕸️: anyway listen, friend
🕸️: buddy
🕸️: pal
⚰️: What do i have to do to make this stop
🕸️: lmao thats the spirit
🕸️: could you be a doll and swing by the watcher's place?
⚰️: I'm not even in London
🕸️: so cute, i swear
🕸️: yeah you are.
🕸️: turn around bff
⚰️: Is it poisonous?
🕸️: i want you to look at that question
🕸️: think about who you sent it to
⚰️: What do you want
🕸️: just bring a box of lovers over
⚰️: A box of what
🕸️: i picked some little buddies out special
🕸️: mated pairs
🕸️: to really make it last for like
🕸️: forever
🕸️: do you know how many eggs a cellar baby lays?
🕸️: like thirty
⚰️: You know you could higher literal delivery men right
🕸️: and if a box of lovers has like 100 of these bad boys
🕸️: you know my little dudes live pretty long?
⚰️: Fine
🕸️: fuck yeah
🕸️: you're so cool oli
⚰️: Delete my number
🕸️: already gone
-------
: Are you concerned at all?
👁️: About what should I be concerned about? No please, tell me. God forbid there's a blind spot in my vision. Perish the thought.
: So you're aware of the situation?
👁️: Go ahead, I'm listening.
: ...I'm sure you're handling it.
👁️: Just like I handle everything else. By myself.
: Where did this bad mood even come from?
👁️: Well this sanctimonious prick texted me.
: You're allowed to pick your own Archivist.
👁️: If you were wondering what the divorce was about, it's this, we're here, we've arrived to the point.
: I'm not trying to condescend to you.
👁️: Spoken like someone about to start condescending.
: You're literally sitting on a nest, Elias.
👁️: Bold of you to assume I don't want it there.
-------
Tim: are you still mad?
Martin: ...No.
Tim: great uh, good.
Martin: I'm sorry for snapping.
Tim: no, it was a shitty joke. Sasha already told me off.
Martin: Oh thank god. I was sure Prentiss got you.
Tim: fair.
Martin: Apologizing on your own? Really had me worried.
Tim: alright alright, yes yes, get it out.
Martin: I already got it out.
Tim: you're better than all of us Martin.
-------
Sasha: Want to come over?
Tim: yeah sure.
Sasha: Bring some wine over, yeah?
Tim: long day?
Sasha: Oh, you wouldn't believe it.
Tim: try me.
Sasha: No, I mean, you literally wouldn't believe it.
Tim: really. try me. i'm down for anything.
Sasha: Yeah you are.
Tim: up top
Sasha: I'm already outside, Tim. I don't know how much higher you want me to get.
Tim: you have to come get me now actually i'm swooning too hard
Sasha: The things I do for casual work hookups.
-------
🐛: RRREEEAAADDDYYY???
👦: d(-_^)
🐛: CCCAAANNN YYYOOOUUU SSSEEEEEE IIITTT
🧒🏻: (๑´ڡ`๑三๑´ڡ`๑)
🐛: CCCUUUTTTEEE
👧🏻: i'm nothing if not (ฅ⁍̴̀◊⁍̴́)و ̑̑
🐛: JJJUUUSSSTTT WWWAAAIIITTTIIINNNGGG
🧑🏿: ʅ(｡Ő౪Ő｡)ʃ
🐛: :::)))
👰🏻: hey wait listen if you're just burning time...☆⌒ヽ(´ε｀ )
🐛: ???
👰: burn some time with me (((*☣ω☣(ε◕* )))
🐛: HHHAAAHHHAAA OOOKKKAAAYYY
👰🏿: ღ꒡ ᴈ꒡)♡⃛(꒡ε ꒡ღ
-------
Jonathan Sims: Stay away from any Michaels.
Martin: I don't think I know that many but I'll try my hardest too.
Jonathan Sims: Sasha had an experience earlier today.
Martin: Just one more thing to look out for.
Jonathan Sims: Stay safe tonight.
Martin: Will do. You too.
-------
Martin: [Screen Shot Sent]
Martin: Oh my god.
Tim: wow.
Tim: when's the wedding?
Sasha: Don't be a dick, Tim.
Tim: i'm being sincerely supportive of our coworker and his weird crush on the boss who lowest key hates him.
Tim: how am I being a dick?
Sasha: Tim.
Martin: I think that's the nicest thing he's ever said to me.
Tim: and you've even got it saved for posterity.
Sasha: Oh Martin.
-------
🍃: if you want to make it a double date, i've got Takers
🌩: I keep waiting for it to stop and it just doesn't.
🍃: you have to stay on “The Grind” as the kids Say
🌩: I can't believe I'm even entertaining this but who?
🍃: Peter's moping again.
🌩: No.
🍃: that's fine
🍃: didn't want to make out with him anyway
-------
⚰️: Done
🕸️: someone should promote you
⚰️: Can I ask why you call them that
🕸️: my chums?
⚰️: Yeah
🕸️: well
🕸️: The Mother spins her webs and her Children are all upon them
⚰️: and
🕸️: i guess
🕸️: in this analogy
🕸️: i'm a college drop out turned baby sitter
🕸️: just to make ends meet
🕸️: my life is so hard
🕸️: so trying
⚰️: So it's bitter
🕸️: huh?
🕸️: haven't you been paying attention oli?
🕸️: they're great kids
-------
🌀: yOu Up?
Jonathan Sims: Wholly and entirely against my will, but yes. Go ahead.
🌀: bOuGhT a FrIeNd A fIrE eXtInGuIsHeR. hE wAs De-LiGhTeD.
Jonathan Sims: [Is Typing]
Jonathan Sims: [Is Typing]
Jonathan Sims: [Is Typing]
Jonathan Sims: I don't know if I'm more mad about you kidnapping my employee or about that atrocity.
🌀: gotta love the hustle though
