#textiversary

[clairemahoney8]

14 years ago I absolutely hated your guts. 5 years ago, I got into the mortgage business and recognized that I should probably swallow my pride and get on your good side because professional relationships are crucial in this business. But it was 1 year ago today that @jenniferklarson called me asking if I’d be willing to let her set me up on a date. We stayed in the friend-zone for another month, but it definitely didn’t take that long for me to be smitten. I literally don’t think ANYONE ELSE that knew us would have EVER put us together. I certainly never would have 😂 but turns out you are absolutely perfect for me and I didn’t even know that being this happy was possible! I love you SO MUCH @mattmahoney7. Forever 🙌🏻 #didnotseetthatonecoming #whoknew #jenniferdid #textiversary #themahoneybunch

[strangertexts-blog]

Out of context (and taco shells)

Sometimes it's fun to read my stranger texts out of context. But first, full disclosure: I have more than one repeat offender. Very few of them feel the need to share their very intimate lives with me as much as the original RO did, though. So when the StrangerTexts get sparse, I get creative and fill in the cracks in their personal story. It's like MadLibs, but with Verizon screw-ups providing the outline. 

South Carolina, 1/16/11 12:54PM [side note: we just shared our 1-year stranger-text-iversary--what should I send? Candy hearts with over-sharing phrases on them?]

What time r we walking?

SC, 1/16/11 5:27 PM: Muffintop is ready [to go on that walk today]

SC, 1/16/11 6:44 PM: Muffintop is ready [you really can't wait to get that muffintop going]

SC, 6/16/11 4:56PM: Can you call me in today? [ohhh, so that's where you get your muffintop--from sitting on your ass and not going to work]

SC, 7/21/11 3:09PM: Can you call me in today? [no wonder muffintop needed to go on that walk so bad]

SC, 7/23/11 6:48PM: Where is the taco shells? [on the top shelf with your grammar and work ethic; all three being clearly out of reach]

SC, 8/30/11 2:20PM: How did lavern stone die? [Not sure. Did you try googling it? Because I did, and I found his online memory book/tribute/obituary thing. It wasn't that hard. I won't share though because that's not what I do. That's what Verizon does for me.]

SC, 1/18/12 7:55PM: I'm in churh [Looks like you left that 2nd "c" on the shelf with the taco shells] 

SC, 1/18/12 7:59PM: What did you leave on voicemail......m in churh [God does look down on those who listen to their voicemail during Bible Study. However, Jesus did say "blessed are the stranger-texters, for they shall inherit the muffintop."]