#thanks hamlet

[cxnscience]

. . . . . Alright.

[cyanpeacock]

Irrevelant.

No revelations are taking place here.

Collective consciousnmess without Self only semantic network now

[goldrushrunning]

I like the phrase "GET THEE TO A NUNNERY" because its a fantastic replacement for "YOU WHORE" or "GO TO CHURCH" and i can yell it in public without the glares of suburban mothers

[professorfangirl]

bring the love

That's what my best friend says to me, just about every day when we head off to teach: bring the love. That's how I connect to students, by bringing my love of the subject and wearing it on my sleeve, and using it to show them ways into the text. I've had to remind myself of that lately in fandom. A friend just made a post about how an argument with another fan-friend over s3 had led to an impasse, so they finally unfollowed each other. That kinda got me in the gut. To tell you the truth, I actually just had to use some therapy stuff in working through my feelings about this season, because I was starting to do some unproductive things in responses to it, and to other people about it. I've just been so mad.

So I did this thing I've been told to do with anger: ask what's under it. For me and many others, anger's usually a cover for a more frightening emotion: here, under the anger at the season was disappointment. And under the disappointment was (oddly) hurt, and loss. And under the loss, attached to it, was fear, fear of losing the best part of fandom: the connection. The love. That might be what we all fear most in our lives, the loss of love and connection, shared joy and validation. And I for one get so much of that in fandom that when I don't enjoy the show as much, when I just can't engage, I get scared I'll lose love. Which is why my friend's post tugs so, so hard on my heart.

So I have a choice to make: is there a way to engage? I managed it just now, I found something interesting in the text and pulled it to the surface, and that made me feel better. Made me interested. Even the things that frustrate us can be interesting things to talk about. To connect over. And damn if that connection isn't more important than anything, even, strangely enough, the show. To my heart, anyway.