#thatsneakymedic

[infernoparadis]

*Arrives.*. His only excuse was that he was seriously injured from a mission to the point of months of rest. But he wonders what has changed from the Akatsuki hideout.

"KABUTO!" Sasori's infuriated yell thunders through the candle-lit hallways of the Akatsuki base. Oh, someone told Sasori that Kabuto was here (it was Deidara), and he was not happy.

Seconds later, Sasori comes galloping--yes, galloping--down the rock-chiselled tunnel with terrifying speed for such a large puppet as Hiruko, coming within mere inches of trampling Kabuto.

"Where the 'ell 'ave ye been?! I ain't 'eard 'air or 'ide of ya, n' after months ya just walk yer 'appy arse in 'ere?" Sasori's tail shot toward the medic, its pointed tip stopping millimetres from Kabuto's nose, and stone walls echoing with the faint drip, drip, drip of lethal poison.

"Ye best get talkin' n' it best be a damn good excuse, or I'm turnin' yer bludgin' ass into fertilizer for me garden."

[saisbrothershin]

*Arrives from under Shin's floorboard. Where he was hiding. *.

"Pssssst. I managed to sneak out a couple of pain killer pills from the medical ward for you and your brother to use if you need them. But I'm sorry that I couldn't take the bottle. Too obvious and would be suspicious so make it count if your cough is too much to bear."

"... Oh! And I almost forgot. Cut the pills in half and take them only two times a day with food. We're still kids so be careful about overdosing."

(smol Kabuto sneaking around and helping out Shin and his brother. ;_;)

“I’m really sorry, otouto,” Shin sighs as he patches up his brother’s injuries. “I didn’t think they would beat you, too.” When his brother giggled at Shin’s snarky comment back at Root headquarters, though, that sealed the boy’s fate. The snarky comment sealed Shin’s. That, and the fact that neither of them killed the bystander who saw the assassination that was officially an “accident.”

Shin is almost ready to get patched up himself when the floorboards open and produce a person. Suddenly on high alert, Shin dives in front of his brother and prepares to fight—but it’s just Kabuto, another of the unfortunate boys in Root. He’s got…pain pills?

Shin doesn’t know how to react to this gesture. It’s so unlike anything anyone in Root ever does. Shin looks at his brother, who seems equally perplexed.

“Th…thank you?” Shin ventures. Could those couple of pills really mean relief from the beating and his illness, too? The thought takes away the constant tension inside him, making him sag to his knees.

“Thank you,” Shin says again. “You’re something else, Kabuto-kun.”

[kagami--uchiha]

"Well, aren’t you just sweet as a cookie full of arsenic..."

(That last ask got me wondering if Kagami is more deadly than he appears. :'D )

Kagami smiled. This gentle, soft and kind smile he always had. The curly haired Uchiha moved in a little closer, invading Kabut's spce with movements that weren't threatening, yet the way he held eye-contact was meant to send that intimidating little message.

Slowly, so very slowly did he tilt his head from one side to the other, the black coils moving in acocordance - slow and like the shadow of an eldritch horror that sought to drown out all light. Suddenly his skin seemed so incredibly pale compared the inky blackness of his hair, it was like staring at the moon that made a full contrast against a starless night. Mysterious, beautiful... cold.

One of his claw-gloved hands reached out, the very shap tip of it slowly dragging along the sensitive skin of Kabuto's jawline until the whole fingertip then fully came to a stop under his chin, curling there before he lift his face up some. Kagami's eyes opened a hint more, the shadow of the Mangekyo Sharingan visible in the darkened greys, like a warning as to what his eyes are capable of.

"I would rather compare myself to thallium.. I like to kill efficiently.. albeit slowly. And the sweetness of the cookie will stay... as I am tasteless.", he whispered right against Kabuto's lips, he had leaned in closer and closer while he spoke. "... So be careful of the kind if treats I offer to you.. Who knows what they are laced with~."

After which Kagami went back to his initial position, his smile no longer carrying the feeling of threat. No, he just looked as innocent and kind as ever. "I don't know why you would accuse me of such a vile think, Kabuto-saaaaan~!"

[lord-danzo]

✶

[MEME] Send ✶ and I’ll write a headcanon about our muses

It's a faint, distant childhood memory that ambushes Kabuto while he's eating his breakfast. He has a stressful day ahead. Maybe that's why it pops up in his head now.

Kabuto sits down next to a shoe that's the side of his lower leg. He's very tiny. He slides open the door of a room.

"He's out of bed, again?" Danzo's voice asks. He is on the couch, and has his back turned to Kabuto. He looks over his shoulder, displeased.

"Oh!" Mother NoNo's head pops up above the couch.

"What is it, boy?" Danzo asks.

"I'll take care of it," says Mother NoNo. She gets up from the floor, and goes to Kabuto. She picks a red piece of fabric up from the floor.

"He doesn't need much sleep. Good quality for a shinobi." Danzo says to her back.

"Kabuto-kun isn't going to be a shinobi," she says over her shoulder to the other adult. "You can finish without me," she adds.

Danzo huffs a laugh.

"What is it, honey? Had a bad dream?" Mother NoNo pulls her dressing gown tighter around her body. Her lips and mouth are wet, and she presses the wetness into her mouth with her thumb. "Let's get you to bed." The red thing in her pocket is made of lace. "I'll give you a rub over the head, and then I tuck you in. You have to sleep at the same time as the other children, ok?"

They go to the children's sleeping area, and she assures him that no, he can't sleep with his helmet on. She tucks him in, wishes him a good night, and then she goes back.

"Daddy?" she calls softly for him, even though they are roughly the same age.

It confused the little Kabuto, but the adult version understands.

[avengernomore]

*Arrives and definitely slapped Sasuke hard enough to leave a mark. Damn the consequences!*

@thatsneakymedic

If Kabuto attempted to flee, he would find himself tightly bound, one snake around his legs, and another wrapped around his middle, binding his arms tight to his sides, as Sasuke rubbed gently at the handprint Kabuto had left on his face.

"Well, that was impolite and unpleasant." He said coldly. "Would you care to explain yourself?"

[kagami--uchiha]

*Squints* "So... Are you and Danzo are a "thing"? And if so, are you going to be a problem to Orochimaru?"

Kagami's gentle expression slowly turned into a grin. Not the one that spoke out of amusement, more the one that held secrets that were deep, dark and unknown. From his crouching position that he has on the wall, he leaned a bit down to Kabuto, one of his clawed hands holding himself steady on the wall. ".. Offering yourself in your master's stead, perhaps?"

[infernoparadis]

*Presents him a first aid kit with a bow on it as a present to them. (Medical stuff isn't cheap yo!)

"Happy Birthday. And about that slap... "sorry" about that."

"Hmph. You mean that pussy-ass slap, hn? I barely felt it," Deidara says, as if his face still wasn't bright red and puffy from the slap. He'll take the first aid, though, so Sasori stops bitching about wasting medical supplies on him.

[kisamc]

*Gets curious and he decides to peer over what they're eating, but he grimaces at the petrified dried seahorse staring up at him. As if pleading to be saved despite it being dead.*

He'll just sit a bit further away from Kisame now. (Hello! 👋)

Even if it was just a glance, Kisame could ALWAYS tell when someone was eyeing his food. HIS FOOD. He didn't like sharing his meals. However, dried seahorses... Was not a "meal". It was just a little snack ( very tasty! ). He liked the crunch, even if crunch in general was not his favorite type of bite.

He looked over towards Kabuto, who was now wearing a grimace. Clearly, he didn't think Kisame's snack looked appetizing. Even more of a reason for him to offer some. Since the answer would be "no thanks", and he could keep eating the seahorses while feeling like he had been both polite and generous. A win-win.

❝ Would you like a taste? They have a lovely crunch. ❞ To demonstrate, he popped one in his mouth and crushed it between his teeth.