Not me getting emotional over people saying that Harrow doesn't care about Gideon, like. How do y'all even read books 😭😭
Anyway here's a completely factual list of things Harrow does throughout GtN and HtN (no Nona because she's barely in Nona) that show Harrow may be incredibly bad at expressing her emotions but she cares very deeply, indeed:
GtN:
- Harrow is the first to pay Gideon a compliment
- Harrow leaves bread for Gideon even though she herself is overwhelmed by food and doesn't eat breakfast
- Harrow thinks someone is dangerous and immediately decides to take them on herself instead of putting Gideon in danger (she thinks she is giving Gideon the safe/easy task)
- Harrow refuses lyctorhood when she finds out the price , even though it's all she's wanted and it's the only thing that will save her house (and she knows she NEEDS to save her house and continue Anastasia's line)
- Harrow begs Gideon not to die
- Harrow says she "cannot conceive a world without [Gideon]"
- Upon becoming a lyctor the first thing she does is beg the Emperor for Gideon's life
- And when he says no, sorry impossible, she says "how can you ask me to live with it?"
HtN:
- Upon becoming a lyctor, Harrow, genuius extraordinaire, decides that if she lobotomizes herself to forget Gideon and override her name, it MIGHT save her soul (she isn't even sure if it will work! It's the only thing she has to try) even though she knows this risks her own life (not to mention her brain, which is like the one thing she is incredibly proud of)
- She spends the next few weeks puking and being mad generally having a pretty bad time of lyctorhood
- she dies even Gideon's name on her lips even though! She doesn't even know! Who Gideon is!
- her mind reconstructs several AUs of her relationship with Gideon
- she repeats their wedding vows from GtN
- Upon remembering Gideon, she is extremely happy that her scheme worked
- She threatens to hurt anyone who says Gideon killed herself and insists Gideon was murdered
- Upon learning that Gideon's soul is in control of her body she decides to take a nap in the tomb/(pocket dimension?) Instead of reclaiming her body and destroying Gideon once and for all.
And this is just like. Completely factual information, i haven't included any of the meta or allusions or parallels to other relationships that are drown. This is just. A list.
