I saw The Choir and The Throes last night, which probably means nothing to 99% of you rappers out there. Really I think only Ben Horne even understands what this all means, and he’s gone, but my thoughtspew is coming fast and I don’t want to lose it. The dudes were mad old, the crowd was sitting and munching nachos, but I was launched back into a world of weird sadness and good memories of when we were all younger and I was indoctrinated into weird music by my older brother Ben.
Anyways, Ben died (The Choir’s “Salamander” was on his fav songs list at the time of his death) and I ended up with his “Wide Eyed Wonder” cassette. Yesterday, The Choir came to Vienna and played that album in its entirety, and here are some pictures of me with Derri and Steve signing Ben’s old tape, and Bill with my own copy of “Fall on Your World”. It mattered to me. The rest of the story probably doesn’t to you (or anyone), but here I go, back way back…:
Ben or Eric bought the 2nd Throes album in ’93 or ‘92 when we had no idea what ripping off R.E.M. sounded like, but we played that album on steady repeat, one of the only non-Petra CDs in the house. Dudes certainly got weird, and I didn’t realize how good it was to have Mike Knott and Derri Daugherty featured on some jangly indie rock. “Noose of Trust” was the classic, and I remember Ben copying lyrics and printing them, posting onto his wall. Listening to that album now is not like hearing music, but like living as a 7 year old, smelling the blue downstairs carpet and looking up to older brothers. When they busted out the gates with “Say Hello” last night, I was way more emotional than I expected, confused as to what strange mixture of memories and forgetfulness was hitting me, like I don’t even think about that I’ve lost my best mentor unless I remember the music that he was shoving onto me all those years ago. Time. Yesterday the guitars were chiming, Campbell’s vocals were as charming as ever, but the flashbacks were better.
In ’96, Dad took me to Family Bookstore to pick out a disc for my 10th birthday. After seeing that “Away with the Swine” was peaking on some CCM chart, I ended up with The Choir’s “Free Flying Soul,” not knowing that they were legends a decade in. That CD ruled and inspired me as maybe a dozen other albums have. And it was WAY over my head. But I latched onto some elements. I remember waiting by the door at Canterbury Woods Elementary School dismissal to go home a few days after my birthday cos I desperately wanted to hear “The Chicken,” running home to put it onto Ben’s stereo before he got home from Cross Country practice. This was a turning point for me, the first band I had known before Ben and that he totally loved. (He tried to trade my copy off of me for Mesa or some such garbage many times. That’s one thing about older brothers – they’ll give you the Rick Schus and swear they are Cal Ripkens.) Eventually, Eric or Ben bought (or BMG’d?) the “Love Songs and Prayers” Choir Best Of, and we proceeded backwards to hear all sorts of classics of that hope/faith/despair/darkness/love/God/sex/weird mix that The Choir did so well.
“Car, Etc.” was the one they pushed onto the family, and I have never thought it anything less than genius. It is the one song that I think transcends mere nostalgia from “Wide Eyed Wonder”, a real classic. Last night, Steve shook all sortsa bells, Derri did the incantations, and Robin chanted along and it was a real peak experience.
It doesn’t touch listening to it on a tiny boombox with your brothers in the kitchen tho.
