*Waits until everyone is asleep, then cuts the sprinklers; proceeds to take a match and light the ugly tree on fire* BURN, B*TCH! *Laughs maniacally and disappears, but not before throwing the replica of Brownie into the flames*
*Wakes up to the smell of smoke and the fire alarm blaring, then rushes into the den to find the Christmas tree ablaze!* NOOOO! *Grabs a fire extinguisher and puts the blaze out, then starts sobbing once I see the burnt Brownie replica* BROWNIE NOOOO! *Cries as I think Brownie actually died in the flames*
*Runs to the den* HOLY SH*T! ZIMMY, WHAT HAPPENED!?
*Holds up the replica and points at the tree* BROWNIE'S GOOOONE! *Continues sobbing*
*Starts crying along with my dad, but sees Brownie come in through the cat door* Daaaa! B'ownie! *Points to Brownie who rubs against my dad*
*Gasps* Brownie!! *Holds the little kitten gently, glad to have her back; is still upset about the burnt tree and gifts*
*Sighs* I'm sorry, Zimmy. Luckily, I have a backup plan...*Pulls out a little pre-built plastic tree* Here, buddy! *Sets it up and gathers whatever presents survived the fire* At least two of your and Baby's gifts survived...
*Feels a bit better, but is still upset*
*Hugs Zimmy* Hey, it'll be okay. Considering that you and Baby have been good this year, Santa's going to bring you something special!
But, remember when I mauled Tak-e-over and-
Zimmy, you were just protecting your friend Miyuki. Your heart was in the right place.
*Nods, then nuzzles Dib*
*Hugs my two dads tightly*
(The kittens start rubbing up against the three.)
*Sneers at the abhorrent display, then goes to execute the second part of my plan*
