Right, being brave and posting something that may make people start to dislike me, refuse to rp with me or outright unfollow me.
I am dropping almost all of my threads. I will try and see if last minute inspiration strikes me today and if not then so be it.
If I do not reply to you by 23:59 GMT tonight, our thread has been dropped.
(Quickly noting: this does not necessarily effect threads in which my partner had gone on hiatus before I started having problems. People I haven't got replies from which this applies to off the top of my head: nagayakonoha, konohascherryblossom, toad-sage-jiraiya. If you want to continue our thread drop me an ask. Same applies if you think too much time has passed.)
If you want to find out why, click read more:
Now before anyone starts thinking it's because I'm not happy with their skills as a roleplayer, this is not the case at all. Lately I have had a melancholy when it comes to my muse and I find myself wanting to start new threads to be re-inspired but as the threads pile up, I get more discouraged and start seeing replying as an obligation due to how long I've made people wait.
Making this issue worse is that for the past month or so I've been finding out that more and more people are too shy/intimidated to approach me. The thing is with this is that while it makes me think "oh, maybe this is because they think I'm a good roleplayer or something?", it also builds on pressure not to dissapoint people.
This isn't your lot's fault for that mindset coming about: a problem I've had for years in real life is that my family acts like nothing that I do is ever good enough. I don't want to sound big headed, but I'm naturally talented in several areas and because of this, there are expectations that are too high for me to realize and the pressure my mum puts on me is so bad that I've burst into tears over it on more than one occasion. Unfortunatley, the moment enough/certain people compliment me on any sort of skill I start piling on pressure and am scared of proving other's opinions of me to be wrong.
As you can guess by my typing this, the issue's extended to roleplaying.
Dropping the threads I'm not feeling confident on replying to means I will reduce the load and overall pressure. Also, this is my mind feels like a screw up; it's what I want. My having to reset things proves to myself I am fallible and am allowed to mess up so I can alleviate pressure in this manner as well hopefully.
The now 8 hour time limit means that I won't fool myself into thinking that certain threads have hope in me keeping up the inspiration in them.
If any of you feel you can forgive me for this, I would be delighted to do a new thread with you in future, even if the current one has been dropped. Please don't be scared to drop me an ask or think the current predicament has anything to do with you personally as I would feel awful about that. Note that our muses' relationship has not changed, merely that the current thread will be over.
Tagging those currently still in my bookmarks and some afore mentioned people. If you're tagged, you may not get reset - we'll see in 8 hours' time.
....Just realized that thepinkkunoichi's account is missing. Again. I guess that makes things with her easier.
Sorry reblooming and kazenokyuubi in particular if this ends up affecting you - I probably shouldn't have asked to join in the first place if there was a risk of something like this happening.
