#the_ocdproject

[farewell-to-lorien]

A Quick Look into Relationship OCD

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

What is Relationship OCD?

A subtype of OCD characterized by obsessions & compulsions around uncertainty of a relationship. R-OCD doesn't just affect couples; it can affect any valued relationship, including pets, colleagues, friends, parents, etc.

Examples of relationship obsessions

"What if I don't love my partner?"

"What if I chose the wrong partner?"

"What if I don't love my kids?"

"What if I'm not good enough for my friend?"

Examples of relationship compulsions

Reassurance seeking from family/friends. Eg., asking a friend if they think their relationship is working.

Mentally reviewing a list of reasons why you and your partner are meant to be together.

Comparing your relationship by spending hours on social media to examine other people's relationships.

Checking whether you feel sexually aroused by your partner or not.

“So, how is relationship OCD different from relationship doubts?”

Almost everyone experiences relationship doubts at some point in their life.

However, for someone with R-OCD these thoughts are relentless and impair normal daily functioning.

Someone with R-OCD will spend at least one hour a day engaging with these obsessions and compulsions.

For someone with R-OCD, the obsessions and compulsions are carried from one relationship to the next, independent of how well the relationship is going.

[farewell-to-lorien]

A Quick Look into Gender Identity OCD

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

What is Gender Identity OCD?

A subtype of OCD characterized by obsessions & compulsions related to a person's gender identity. People with GOCD experience intrusive thoughts about doubt/confusion of their gender identity.

Examples of gender obsessions

"What if I actually identify as male?"

"What if I'm transgender?"

"What if I'm actually female?"

"How do I know for sure that I'm male?"

"What if I'm living a lie?"

"What if I'm actually cisgender?"

Examples of gender compulsions

Checking emotional responses to certain stimuli to use as "proof" of their gender identity. Eg., "How do I feel when I wear women's clothes?"

Mentally reviewing past memories to try and find certainty over their gender identity.

Rumination to try and "figure out" their true gender identity.

Excessively researching transgender forums to compare thoughts/feelings to those who are transgender.

Gender Identity OCD

GOCD is rooted in the inability to tolerate uncertainty, rather than the idea of actually being transgender/cisgender.

Compulsions are often focused on trying to know for certain whether their intrusive thoughts are a sign of an unrecognized desire to transition their gender presentation.

GOCD is commonly referred to as transgender OCD (TOCD). The term TOCD is increasingly discouraged as both cisgender and transgender people can experience gender identity OCD.

"So, how is gender identity OCD different from gender dysphoria?"

The difference

By nature, OCD is ego-dystonic—meaning the intrusive thoughts a person experiences DO NOT align with the sufferer's values/identity.

Someone with gender dysphoria will experience distress related to their gender identity no longer aligning with the gender they were assigned at birth—usually affects those who are transgender.

Whereas, someone with GOCD experiences distress in not being able to prove with 100% certainty that they are accurate in their gender identity. In other words, it isn't rooted in distress of gender, but rather uncertainty.

[farewell-to-lorien]

A Quick Look into Meta OCD

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

What is Meta OCD?

A subtype of OCD characterized by obsessions related to OCD itself. In other words, the OCD goes meta and the individual beings to obsess about obsessing.

Examples of meta obsessions

"What if my OCD gets bad again?"

"What if I develop obsessions about X?"

"What if the theme I used to have comes back?"

"What if I actually like/enjoy my obsession?"

"Do I really have OCD? What if this isn't OCD?"

"What if I'm using my obsessions as an excuse?"

"What if I'm lying about my obsessions?"

"Am I anxious enough about my thoughts?" (Aka, backdoor spike)

Examples of meta compulsions

Trying to problem solve/find an answer.

Excessively researching symptoms of OCD to seek certainty on whether this is OCD or not.

Seeking reassurance from therapists/fellow sufferers/OCD advocates. Eg., "I was just wondering if this is a sign of OCD?"

Meta OCD

Occurs when the obsessions are no longer about the theme of the obsession, but rather the obsessions themselves.

Meta-OCD can present as a result of trauma associated with experiencing OCD. It makes sense why an OCD sufferer would be worried about getting bad again, when the "bad" was so torturous.

Just like anything else related to OCD, the challenge is to accept the uncertainty. "Maybe it will get bad again, maybe it won't."

[farewell-to-lorien]

OCD Treatment & Recovery

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject and @treatmyocd on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

Exposure & Response Prevention: What is it?

ERP therapy: a type of behavioral therapy that exposes people to situations which provoke their obsessions and resulting distress, while helping them to prevent their compulsive responses.

The goal of ERP: to free people from the obsession-compulsion cycle so they can live a better life.

ERP is the gold standard treatment for OCD.

Regardless of the theme of the obsession, ERP works via the same fundamental mechanism...

1) Exposure

Purposeful exposure to thoughts, images, objects, or situations that provoke obsessions and result in subsequent anxiety/distress.

2) Response Prevention

Choosing not to engage with compulsive behavior to alleviate the anxiety/distress that has been provoked by the exposure.

How does ERP work?

ERP reduces obsessional fear by habituation and inhibitory learning. Frequent exposure to a fear based stimulus will result in a natural decline of anxiety over time (habituation). As a sufferer begins to learn that they can tolerate anxiety without reliance on compulsive behaviors, they gain new safety information which disconfirms their original belief and inhibits the obsessional fear (inhibitory learning).

Is ERP right for me?

Every OCD sufferer's story looks different. Only you can decide whether treatment is something you want to enter into. Here are a few things to consider...

What are my goals? Am I willing to go outside my comfort zone? How long am I prepared to be in treatment for? Do I have a strong support system outside of therapy? Do I have access to a therapist I trust and respect?

Getting started

Finding a therapist

The first step is finding a therapist. While there are many therapists to choose from, finding one that can effectively treat OCD can be a challenge.

NOCD is one of the world's leading providers of affordable effective OCD treatment.

All therapists at NOCD are licensed ERP therapists.

To get started and to find out more, visit www.nocd.com.

[farewell-to-lorien]

A Quick Look into Existential OCD

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

What is Existential OCD?

A subtype of OCD characterized by obsessions & compulsions related to a preoccupation with philosophical questions about life & existence.

Examples of existential obsessions

"What if I am not really here?"

"What if my life is a simulation & nobody around me is real?"

"What is the purpose of life?"

"What if we are just an accident?"

Examples of existential compulsions

Avoiding TV shows/books/places that feature themes of unreality, simulations, or alternate universes.

Checking for physical reactions to check that they exist. Eg., pinching oneself.

Excessive research into philosophy/psychology/religious texts to try and find answers to intrusive thoughts.

Mentally reviewing answers about existence.

“So, how is existential OCD different from deep thinking?”

Existential OCD

The thoughts are intrusive; they do not stem from curiosity or interest. Instead, they are a source of major anxiety and distress.

The intrusive thoughts come with an urgency that demands a person answer them with 100% certainty in order to relieve anxiety.

The lack of certainty causes immense distress which detracts from the ability to live life in a fulfilling way.

...vs. Deep Thinking

Existential thoughts and philosophical theories are met with interest and curiosity.

A deep thinker is able to think about existential theories without the demand for absolute certainty.

A deep thinker is able to get on with their life after debating a philosophical theory.

[farewell-to-lorien]

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

...which is why it is so distressing.

Those with POCD tend to love children. Those with Harm OCD tend to be kind people. Those with SO-OCD tend to value their identity. Those with Postnatal OCD tend to love their baby. Those with Relationship OCD tend to value their relationships. Those with Religious OCD tend to value their religion.

In summary

OCD goes after what you value.

Obsessions are ego-dystonic.

This is what makes OCD so distressing.

This is why your obsessions make you feel disgusted, afraid, repulsed, sickened, terrified, scared, distraught, etc.

[farewell-to-lorien]

#1: Logic does not satisfy OCD.

OCD always comes up with a "but?"

#2: Evidence does not satisfy OCD.

OCD always comes up with a "but?"

#3: Rationale does not satisfy OCD.

OCD always comes up with a "but?"

#4: Reassurance does not satisfy OCD.

OCD always comes up with a "but?"

The take-home message:

Nothing will satisfy OCD. Any attempt to satisfy OCD only serves to feed the obsession-compulsion cycle. The answer lies in accepting uncertainty.

OCD rests when you rest.

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

[farewell-to-lorien]

How to help someone with OCD

(Transcribed from this post from @the_ocdproject on Instagram, edited for grammar and spelling.)

Avoid reassurance

Reassurance such as "I saw you turn the iron off" does not help your loved one, it helps OCD. It reinforces the sufferer's belief that there is something to be reassured of and that they cannot tolerate the anxiety of uncertainty.

Don’t accomodate

Following obsessional rules laid out by a sufferer (eg., changing clothes upon entering the house) reinforces the idea of danger. Accomodation does not help your loved ones, it helps OCD.

Research

Read up on OCD to ensure that you aren't making any unhelpful comments that may prevent the sufferer from opening up. I would suggest the following materials:

https://iocdf.org/ https://www.treatmyocd.com/ https://www.ocduk.org/

Draw up a plan

In times of high anxiety when OCD has reclaimed its power, it may be useful to have a pre-prepared plan with your loved one. Eg.:

When I ask if I locked the door:

Remind me of how OCD works

Remind me it's OCD and I don't need reassurance

Delay for 15 minutes and then ask me if I still want reassurance

Look after you

OCD not only affects sufferers, but also those around them. In fact, it can be really dificult to live with someone who has OCD. Not only is it upsetting to see someone you love in such distress, but the constant plead for reassurance or living by obsessional rules can be draining. Remember, it is not your responsibility "cure" someone of their OCD.